GUEST REVIEW: Europe – War of Kings (2015) by Jesse A. Jones

For Tommy Morais’ excellent 4/5 star review of this album, click here, and to skip directly to the comment that started it all, click here!

GUEST REVIEW by academic and rock fan “Jesse A. Jones”*

WAR OF KINGSEUROPE – War of Kings (2015 UDR)

The Swedish rock band Europe stormed onto the charts in the mid 1980’s with uplifting keyboard oriented pop rock, written by singer and founder Joey Tempest, a golden fluffy-haired gifted soul.  Then their slide down the charts began.  Albums like Out of This World sold fewer and fewer copies and the band finally broke up in the early 90’s, amid rumours that even their own mothers now preferred The Hives.

Unfortunately for fans and the band, these would be the last great albums Europe would make!  The fact that mainstream rock magazines still praise Europe is shocking nonsense.  It’s hard to believe anyone buys that stupidity!  There has not been a real “Europe” in 26 years!  It’s a conspiracy involving many producers, record label execs, musicians, writers, FIFA and the worldwide media cartel as a whole.  The Bilberbergers know but say nothing, while the Rothschilds remain silent.  I have proof written on the back of a beer mat that in 1994 Matt Groening was forced to rewrite a Futurama episode that obliquely referenced the scandal.  Shadowy elements of the secret world government have stifled independent thought and critical opinions, ensuring we will all remain unquestioning and loyal, to both our governments and rock bands alike!

Well, ladies and gentlemen it is my sworn duty to tell you the truth and I will not be silenced, or my integrity bought for 30 pieces of record company silver!

The problem is the Europe of today has nothing in common with the real group Europe that topped the charts in 1987.  Literally. Committing a conspiracy of great scale, they have been secretly and knowingly touring with an imposter singer since 1989!  Their last horrible and fake albums (lifeless and without soul) were not written by the real Joey Tempest.  Without Joey’s talent and unique abilities, the band is a lost joke; twisted and sad – imagine, it would be like Deep Purple without Nick Simper – just unthinkable!

The truth remains shrouded in mystery.  The only details now known, thanks to a covert informant “C.A.”, is that the imposter Joey forced out the real Joey sometime in 1989, using a complex web of lies and half-truths. Plastic surgeons and vocal coaches helped the fake Joey in his goals, and were paid off for their silence, or disappeared.  Some say that the real reason that the late celebrity plastic surgeon Dr. Fredric Brandt suffered from depression was keeping this whole thing secret.  Then, having successfully replaced Joey without anyone noticing, Europe continued to tour with a new voice and face fronting the band, raking in millions.  It is quite remarkable that very few fans have noticed this imposter.  “Joey’s” voice changed on 1991’s Prisoner’s in Paradise album but the complicit media have either ignorantly or purposely covered it up.  Fans have wondered why Joey’s hair style and hair colour changed on that album, assuming it was just a superficial change.  Little did they know that the head and face behind the hair had also changed! Joey would NEVER let his hair go flat like that! Wake up people!

JOEY THEN NOW

Europe with the imposter have made a semi-successful go of it, edging themselves towards world domination, even placing third in Sweden’s Got Talent in 2013, but for an unknown, sinister purpose.  True fans, distinguishable from the herd by their password ‘Cherokee – marching on the trail of tears’, who know and appreciate the talents of the real Joey, have wondered what happened, but no-one listens.  As for the fake fans, how could YOU do this to the real Joey?  How could YOU not even notice this shadow of a Joey up there on stage singing fake odes to “Carrie”?  Shame on the fans, and most of all shame on the band for not stopping this charade 26 years ago!

Just look at the songs here!  “Children of the Night”.  The real Joey would never have written a song about “children of the night”,  “California 405” is the highway that O.J. Simpson was chased down – a definite clue that there was something more going on here than meets the eye!  Why would Europe specifically reference that notorious highway unless they were implying some sort of wrongdoing behind the scenes?

Just listen to the song “Praise You” on this album.  As if the real Joey would have written “Praise You”!  This rude, obscene imposter has terrible lyrics and evil facial expressions.   He is a demonic devil from hell who only cares for himself, not the fans and certainly not the spirit of the original Joey – with the voice, face and hair of an angel.  The real Joey gave the fans everything he had.  His reward was being ousted by an imposter who now receives all the love and praise from ignorant and deceived “fans” who are too stupid to notice the difference.  His only goal in this world is to lie and fool as many fans as possible while he laughs raking in the money!  No talent, no soul, no voice!  That’s the fake Joey right there.  Just listen to War Of Kings, it’s as if he and the whole band are actively setting out to destroy the affection of the fans and ruin the legacy of the band as a whole.  Well I won’t sit idly by and let this happen! No sir!

Some will say, “Well you are wrong.  His hair and voice change with style and age.”  No.  Look at his eyes.  They are not the same eyes, you can see the yawning chasms of hellfire deep in those pupils.  Joey tried to warn you what was happening.  Read the lyrics to “Stranger on the Track”!  Make sense now?  Joey was warning you that “danger” was on his back and nobody listened.  Joey stood for love and the truth!  Long live love!  Long live the truth!  One day Joey will return and prove this all to be true, with the original angelic voice of Europe!

It is hard though to bear this burden, sometimes even I start to doubt, but then I only have to look down at the words tattooed on my thigh; words of inspiration, words of power, the real Joey’s words and I find the strength to go on, in his name.

Rock now, rock the night
‘Til early in the morning light
Rock now, rock the night
You’d better believe it’s right.

No rating

* Professor Emeritus of Applied Conspiracy at the University of Punkeydoodles Corners and author of ‘Paul Is Dead: The Amazing Beatles Conspiracy’, ‘Lennon Lives! Why John Isn’t Dead’ and ‘George! Satan’s Favorite Beatle’.

164 comments

    1. It was one of those weird things. First contact happened via Ouija board. Then he proceeded to email me this review, but encoded, one letter at a time. It took a month to transmit and decode the whole thing.

      Liked by 1 person

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        4. By the way, I heard that the people who fudged Obama’s birth certificate have done the same for the “Fake Joey”.

          Rumour has it that John Norum has not yet noticed it’s a different Joey.

          I keep receiving more info, encoded of course. I’ll continue to bring you the news.

          Liked by 1 person

  3. No offence to the author of this piece, but the evidence has been there for a VERY long time. Since 2006, Europe has been basically confessing to this conspiracy. ‘Secret Society’ is riddled with clues. Just look at the artwork and song titles: “Always the Pretenders,” “The Getaway Plan,” “Devil Sings the Blues.”

    They followed that album with ‘Almost Unplugged,’ which, with a deep listen, reveals the fate of the real, but perhaps now deceased Joey Tempest; songs included “Forever Traveling,” “Wish You Were Here,” “Yesterday’s News,” “Hero,” “Suicide,” and “Memories.”

    Imposter Joey Tempest nearly comes clean on ‘Last Look at Eden’ with the confessional “Only Young Twice.” And if that alone doesn’t convince, you just spend a little time examining the cover to ‘Bag of Bones’ (I advise holding it upside down in a mirror).

    But for the record, I have to confess that I actually prefer the imposter Joey Tempest to the real one. (The real Joey Tempest wore a mustache: http://neh9401.com.ne.kr/artists/Europe/europe2.jpg) And while I do see why some would find cause for alarm, I’m more concerned that no one seems bothered that Ian Haugland is also an imposter. The real Ian Haugland had hair. The imposter Ian Haugland is bald, has tattoos, and is somehow fooling everyone that he is the real deal. Why aren’t more people shocked about this?

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    1. Chris! That was exactly my thought. What about Ian? Clearly, not even the same guy. Obviously. To anyone with eyes, he’s different.

      I too prefer the new Joey.

      Well done with your analysis and comments Chris!!!

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        3. I think Joyce and “The Chief” are related. Same laugh.

          Perhaps they are the same person. The Chief stopped calling around the same time Joyce started calling. Hmmmm.
          Another conspiracy.

          Liked by 1 person

        4. The Chief got pissed off at “Greg”. I heard him say once he was done with him. I think he was upset at Craig making fun of him. I remember emailing Marko to tell him the Chief said he was done with it.

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        7. I love The Chief, Bubbles, and Raymond. I think Craig really grinds their gears though. “Bubbles can I put you on hold?” I have not heard Bubbles call Craig in quite a while, I think Craig was mad he was always drunk and swearing.
          I only hear Raymond call Craig when it is awesome tickets now though. Have you heard his kitty song? WOW.
          I would love to hear the Chief again. I might ask Craig to tell Joyce we want The Chief back.

          Liked by 1 person

        8. A couple weeks ago Stacey was hosting and she asked Raymond if he missed Craig? Raymond answered “No, he’s mean to me.” Kinda felt bad for him because he really doesn’t mean to be annoying…

          Bubbles…never cared for that guy! He might be the one who called me “LeCock”.

          Liked by 1 person

        10. This is true.

          I’m emailing you the Chief’s recording now. Enjoy! He’s calling asking why “Dustin Bieber” never confronts him about calling him a “Little Turd”.

          Liked by 1 person

        11. I feel bad for Raymond as well. Probably the nicest guy in the world. My dqughter always asks me why I like that guy, he’s so annoying. I just say I think he’s funny. At least Marko treats him nice. He seems like he is easlily offended. I heard the Stacey call as well. I’m not sure if it was that call or another that she tried to get his Facebook page out of him. He wouldn’t give it out though.

          Liked by 1 person

        12. I admit there are times, like when he is the only one calling, that I get annoyed. But I find him funny, he makes me chuckle and Dave Jutzi told me he’s super nice in person. Mandy said the same thing.

          Mandy just started a new job on the radio in the US! I can’t remember where she’s living now. I wanna say Iowa.

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        13. OH MAN!!! Was that ever supremely awesome. You should do a blog post about that type of stuff. If you have any more calls recorded post them. Funny stuff. If you do that would be great. I love how he can’t get anyone’s name right. I never knew his real name either. Thanks so much. Made my day

          Liked by 1 person

        14. Sadly I don’t have many more recordings :( But yeah that one was solid gold! I loved the Chief, I woulda partied with that guy.

          I’ll see if I have anything else good to send you.

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        15. I just googled Mandy Grant and she is in Moscow Idaho. She was the first program director that started playing a few obscure tunes. She put up with my calls and emails about the station programming. I hope she is doing well. Now Mike is pushing the boundaries even further. I like where the station is heading.

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        16. I was right it started with an I!

          I have always liked the people at Dave. Patrick lives in the same building, so I can actually say I’ve seen him in his boxers and vice versa (doing laundry and such). Simon is a real serious metal fan. That guys knows his metal. And yes Mike, he is really aiming to please as much as he’s allowed, I think. He mentioned to me a full album playback of Kiss Alive. I suggested Iron Maiden – Live After Death ;)

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        17. I know most listeners got pissed off at Raymond when he would win everything. The tipping point was when the prize was $1500 for every second counts and he called in about 10 times, and no one else could get in. I knew it was Dear MF but Raymond just kept rhyming off random songs as if he would luckily guess it. I think it is a.combination of Craig, but probably more so the mean things jealous people say on Facebook and when theu call in that hurt him most.

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      1. No kidding, Mike. I found myself reading his Wiki page and all sorts of other stuff … then I was all “eh? what on Earth am I doing!?”

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    2. ” Joey would NEVER let his hair go flat like that! Wake up people!”

      Did you really think that would be an actual statement, Doreen?

      I have a question, what Facebook group are you guys from? Because 99% of these hits today came from Facebook.

      Liked by 1 person

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    4. Doreen, ask Joey’s wife if she thought “George! Satan’s Favorite Beatle” and “John Lives!” are real books…

      Amazing how people skip to comment without reading the whole thing.

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  6. Ok……where to begin…..must post fast since I’m sure the guys in white coats coming for ya……The band EUROPE is not a bunch of swap ins for the “real” band as ya say…..can’t give ya proof on Ian or Leven,but they are the real deal.As for Joey Tempest I could….birth certicate,marriage certicate,childrens birth certicates,etc……and oh ya a DNA report!!!!!!!Ya must be in a very bad mental condition,all of ya!!!!!And please feel free to reply to my post…When ya meds kick in be best time!Until then…..Go get help…….

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    6. Hey Miranda, I just found your youtube channel “JoeyTheRockstar”. I also found this comment on your video for “High Enough” (Damn Yankees).

      “Are you the psycho b—- that wants everyone to think you’re married to Joey Tempest? Is this supposed to be Joey singing to you?”

      Seems there are some who don’t believe you are who you say you are, Miranda. Why would that be?

      Liked by 1 person

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      2. Just for shits and giggles I might send a lady friend over to your place, knock on the door and say “Hi, it’s me Miranda. Soooooooooooooooooooo I’ve been reading on your blog post you have quite the collection of Europe music.”
        I’ll ask her to wear a Charles Manson shirt and clean her fingernails with a jack knife. ;)

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  7. WHAT A LOT OF NONSENSE! ARE YOU FOR REAL? I AM A PERSONAL FRIEND OF JOAKIM LARSSON’S, AND I KNOW FOR A FACT THAT HE IS THE REAL JOEY TEMPEST AND IS STILL THE FRONTMAN WITH EUROPE. ARE YOU SANE? WHAT YOU HAVE CLAIMED HERE IS SHEER UNADULTERATED RUBBISH! I SUGGEST YOU GET YOURSELF A PAIR OF GLASSES. YOU MIGHT BE BETTER TO VISIT A PSYCHIATRIST, AS YOU SOUND AS IF YOU NEED ONE!

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    1. “* Professor Emeritus of Applied Conspiracy at the University of Punkeydoodles Corners and author of ‘Paul Is Dead: The Amazing Beatles Conspiracy’, ‘Lennon Lives! Why John Isn’t Dead’ and ‘George! Satan’s Favorite Beatle’.”

      Liked by 1 person

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    1. Billy, sounds like you didn’t get the joke! Google “fake Joey Tempest” and look for the person who spams all the Europe reviews with this conspiracy theory.

      “Jesse A. Jones” is a fake name — a combo between Jesse Ventura and Alex Jones. Get it? Conspiracy theories.

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  10. I FORGOT TO SAY THAT I AM A PERSONAL FRIEND OF JOAKIM LARSSON. HE HAS HIS HAIR CUT SHORTER BECAUSE HE KNOWS THAT HE WOULD LOOK A BIT DAFT IF HE WENT ABOUT WITH THAT LONG HAIR NOW, AS HE IS ALMOST 52 YEARS OLD. MOREOVER, IF HIS VOICE SOUNDS DIFFERENT, THAT IS OWING TO THE FACT THAT THE VOCAL RANGE OF ALL VOCALISTS DECREASES OWING TO THE PROCESS OF MATURATION. THEIR VOICES DEEPEN. JOEY IS NOT IMMUNE TO THIS. LISTEN TO OTHER ROCK VOCALISTS SUCH AS DAVID COVERDALE. IN HIS PRIME, HIS VOICE WAS AWESOME. NOW, IT HAS DETERIORATED. DO YOU THINK IAN GILLAN COULD BELT OUT CHILD IN TIME NOW LIKE HE DID IN HIS EARLY DAYS WITH DEEP PURPLE? THERE ARE OVER I50 FAKE JOEY TEMPESTS ON FACEBOOK, USING HIS NAME. I KNOW FOR A FACT THAT HE IS THE REAL JOEY TEMPEST. SO DOES MY PARTNER. THE JOEY TEEMPEST WHO IS SINGING WITH EUROPE TODAY IS NO IMPOSTER.

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    2. Click the link to Tommy’s review and look at the spam comment from “carrieann”. Then realize this is a work of parody! I did not invent this theory.. I was spammed by it. This ‘review’ isn’t even filed with my reviews. It’s filed with my WTF Comments.

      :)

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    3. Doreen, please. You need to calm down or you might pop an artery. Btw, you look a lot like David Coverdale. I wonder if that’s the real Coverdale because I’ve heard there’s an imposter around. I mean, the real David Coverdale would never dye his hair blonde and record bad covers of his own songs…

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  12. carrieann is the real Joey Tempest? All these personal friends of the band seem to have been fooled by fake Joey, too. Jeez this guy is good!

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  13. Joakim Larsson and his wife are personal friends of mine. They are also personal friends of my partner. We ask him to do cover versions of songs for us, which he does. We also met him recently. A fake? Plastic surgery? Don’t make me laugh! Are you one of those who is going to write a book about this, hoping to make money? If so, forget that idea. Anyone with even a shred of common sense would know that what you are claiming is pure fabrication. If l wasn’t so furious about this, l can assure you that l would laugh my head off!

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    1. You should be laughing because that is what the rest of us did. Don’t be furious, it’s not good for ya.

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  14. You read what Joey’s wife has said on here. I am a personal friend of hers too, as is my partner. We met him recently. Take it from me that this is pure fiction. You trying to make money writing a book about this, hoping to make money? If so, forget it, because anyone who has even one iota of common sense would know that what is being said on here is put fabrication.

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    1. Billy, what’s the matter with you?? Can you not read?? Everybody here agrees with you. The author of this review agrees with you. It is a parody of a pre-existing online conspiracy theory. “George! Satan’s Favorite Beatle”. Seriously, you thought this was real? FIFA?

      Have a coffee. Take a deeeeep breath. Try to keep up at the comments already posted here today.

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      1. If you ask Billy Low nicely perhaps he could get a mixed tape of cover songs for you since he is good friends with Joey Tempest and his wife. Wink wink. Nudge nudge.

        P.S. When does the book come out?

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        1. It’s coming out on the 12th of never!

          It’s hilarious — these people cannot read. Writing a book would probably be useless. These people think “George! Satan’s Favorite Beatle” was a real book???

          Facebook gets dumber every day.

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  15. I wonder if they are all the same sh*t disturber hacking your post almost 3 weeks after you posted it, trying to get a rise out of you. Unless it takes the Facebook crowd 3 weeks to take in the info and come up with a response.

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    1. I think it’s 3 people. Maybe one of them is Joey’s wife maybe not. All that matters is they commented before they finished reading.

      “The real Joey would never let his hair go flat!”. They think that’s a real statement anybody would say?

      I can honestly say I wish I wrote those jokes. Alas, I did not. I would like to take credit for “George! Satan’s Favorite Beatle”, believe me. I cannot. I didn’t come up with that hilarious title.

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        1. This is weirder because it’s a work of parody not a serious review…

          But in all fairness these comments may come from Sweden and maybe the English jokes were lost on them? It’s possible.

          Thanks for the laughs everyone! Especially Boppin.

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  17. What’s happeninhg here???
    How can anyone get so worked up over this? I mean, everybody – as in EVERYBODY – knows that what that carrieann moron wrote is stupid and anyone with a functioning brain will figure that out in 2 bloody seconds.
    Come on now, it’s nothing to get mad about, all you can do is laugh it off and make fun of that carrieann – and Jesse A Jones – idiot instead. Fer Chrissake, how can anyone take this seriously???

    Second, all you “friends” of Tempest that has been commenting here, MIKE DID NOT COME UP WITH THIS OR WRITE THIS!!!!! Is that so hard to understand? He’s not the one you should get angry at. Don’t shoot the messenger!
    He only posted what this Jesse A Jones wrote, which is more or less the same that that deluted carrieann posted in the real review.
    Think about it, it’s a good thing he did because if he hadn’t, you wouldn’t have known about these people writing this garbage, ok?

    I completely understand that it can’t be fun for Joey reading such crap, but Mike’s the wrong guy to take shots at – he hasn’t done anything wrong. And again, no need for screaming, we all know that what is written is completely stupid!

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    1. Just to clarify — Jesse A Jones is not a person. It’s a fake name based on noted conspiracy theorists Jesse Ventura and Alex Jones.

      This ‘review’ (which it is NOT) is a parody of comments I got SPAMMED with by somebody called “carrieann”. Click the link to Tommy’s review. And click the other link(s) I posted.

      Carrieann has been spamming up the internet with this conspiracy theory since 2014. Google it. Click for links. I didn’t make it up.

      Carrieann spammed me and many other sites. And it was kinda hilarious.

      This post is a PARODY of PRE-EXISTING Joey Tempest conspiracy theories already out there. It is intentionally ludicrous, excessively stupid and far fetched. That’s what PARODY is.

      Don’t blame me or anyone else in this forum if you’re passed off. Get a sense of humor and blame the original carrieann if you’re mad.

      And then I recommended you buy Mr. Jones’ book, “George! Satan’s Favorite Beatle”.

      Peace love and chicken grease,
      Mike

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      1. To all of you sudden, Facebook Mike Ladano haters that have popped up I would suggest you go and read his previous blog postings about Europe. He has been touting the band for years, and he comes across as really liking, perhaps loving the band.
        If you really like Europe I would let you know that this has probably sparked a renewed interest in the band. I think you and the band should thank Mike for giving the band the most internet chatter it has possibly had in over 20 years. Any coverage is good coverage. All this Europe talk has got me for one looking for my first Europe album, so thanks Mike.

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        2. Here here!

          Not only is this getting people like Brian to buy Europe albums for the first time, but I’m underlining how utterly stupid the original “theory” was in the first place.

          Liked by 1 person

        3. Brian, although it’s not as popular a choice, can I suggest Start From the Dark? I still really love that album. I think it’s really easy for fans of 80s Europe for get into.

          Thanks for the comment but I’m not too worried.

          This Billy guy who is “furious” makes me laugh though. Talk about going right over his head.

          Maybe the original “carrieann” who spammed me with this story will return for an encore eh!

          Liked by 2 people

        4. The Facebook hate has me thinking of Craig Fee. Unfortunately these people don’t have cat profile pictures — just ones of David Coverdale!!!!

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        8. It’s true! And I’m dying for War Of Kings on Japanese import with bonus tracks.

          I JUST got Bag of Bones (Japanese with bonus tracks) so I’m usually about an album behind, before I can afford to catch up, you know what I mean?

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  18. Dear all, including Facebook people:

    I have altered the beginning of this post to clearly state that it is a work of parody. I think that makes the joke much less funny (you don’t see The Onion doing that), but clearly some folks needed it.

    Best,
    LeBrain

    Liked by 1 person

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  19. I READ THIS ENTIRE BLOG AND I AM QUITE UPSET. I WAS LOOKING FOR INFORMATION ABOUT CONTINENTS. THIS DOES NOT HAVE ANYTHING TO DO WITH THE CONTINENT OF EUROPE. HOW ABOUT A DISCLAIMER FOR ME.

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    1. DEAR BOPPIN TURN OFF YOUR GODDAMN CAPSLOCK BEFORE IT BREAKS MY EYES.

      I WILL PUT UP A DISCLAIMER JUST FOR PEOPLE WHO THINK “JOEY TEMPEST” IS THE NAME OF A STORM THAT HIT THE CONTINENT OF EUROPE.

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    1. I really can’t say any more. Apparently Joey was not amused ;)

      Joey would find this hilarious if he was in on the joke from the start with that stupid comment from carrieann.

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  22. LISTEN TO ME BROTHERS AND SISTERS FOR I, YOUR HUMBLE MESSENGER, SPEAK THE TRUTH. I was having a routing filling when my dentist revealed to me that I was in fact a part of a CIA experiment to place gps trackers IN TEETH. “The original patient, 001, went underground and has not been heard from since, as such you are his replacement for the experiments” my dentist told me. I asked who this individual was and my dentist stated, “I’m tired of hiding the truth, it was indeed Joey Tempest, he is now moving off the grid and may have removed the tracker from his canine tooth.” I tell you this, I AM PATIENT 002 AND JOEY, YOU NEED TO KEEP RUNNING FROM BIG BROTHER. DO NOT LET THEM CATCH YOU!!!!!

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    1. So sad Matthew Trippe isn’t still alive. He would have had a field day with this post…

      That said, I wouldn’t be surprised if all those “friends” of Temp really are just upset (and humorless) fans of the band and that none of the above has even met the band. So please Miranda, Billy and Miss Capslock Doreen, prove me (us) wrong here. If you can.

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      1. Matthew Trippe aka Fake Nikki!

        I’m sure Miranda really is Mrs Larrson. Just looking at the Facebook pages.

        But the point is, there’s someone out there who is saying there’s a fake Joey, which is obviously ludicrous. Whoever that person is, we don’t know. But this was a satire of that idiot’s spam comments.

        So these people – all caps Doreen, and Mrs Tempest, and Billy, we’re not even reading the damn article. They couldn’t have or they would be known it is a goddamn parody.

        I mean how much more obvious could it be? Look at the goddamn picture!

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        2. However, that was before the days of the internet when you couldn’t dispute a hoax in 10 seconds and save yourself tons of public humiliation by fact checking something before looking absolutely stupid in a public forum seen right around the world. At least the people back then had a valid excuse.

          Liked by 1 person

        3. I really hope these people aren’t who they say they are because that disappoints me.

          Should I do a followup “WTF Comments” post with some of the highlights from this thread? People who follow comments here get these things, but not people who just read the posts.

          Thoughts?

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        6. It is up to you for the WTF. I would love to see them here again, along with others I haven’t read. However you may want to find Ron Beasley’s wand to ward off the trolls. Right Billy Low, unless you’re too busy listening to the cover songs Joey did for you. Perhaps that is why it took 3 weeks to respond to this post. HAHAHAHAHAHA

          Liked by 1 person

        7. I’m gonna go for it, in as nice a way as possible. It’s more Billy and Doreen rather than Miranda Larrson who are the ones not paying any attention to the words they are allegedly “reading”.

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        8. I am seriously thinking, Billy Low, Jesse A. Jones AND carrieann are the same troll. Just a thought. If so, he(she) has succeeded in getting his(her) jollies by getting under peoples nerves. You see the same thing in youtube comments when people say racist things or say a band is shit just to get a rise out of people.

          Liked by 1 person

        9. That’s certainly a more likely theory than Joey being a clone, or me having a book deal.

          Who the fuck would pay to read the shit I post here for free anyway?

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        12. At least ALL CAPS DOREEN(or DOREEN ALL CAPS, or DOREEN CAPLOCKS etc.) and Miranda were smart enough to stop when they knew it was a hoax. They did not want further public embarrassment. I would personally have apologized to you for freaking out, but that is just me. When it is someone you married, or perhaps stalk, whichever the case may be, you fly off the handle without thinking. However someone, not naming any names is either REALLLLLLLLLLY dumb or just a good old shit disturber, or a bit of both. I would go with door number 3.

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        13. You should do a blog post about the random use of CAPSLOCK. I personally think there is a ghost in my room that randomly pushES IT. HEY. STOP THAT!!!!!!!!!!

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    3. I agree Billy. All this nonsense to try and train the unintelligent, misinformed readers that are (like most people on Facebook) quick to judge without knowing all the facts about what parody is.

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      1. Billy, did you even bother to read what anybody here has said? Did you click the links I made available for you, to this ridiculous theory, that were are mocking?

        Didn’t think so!!!!

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    2. Awesome, Einstein! U finally got it. Or did U?
      The only thing you have posted here after your outbursts are “What a lot of nonsense” and “What a joke”. Is that all you can bring to the table?
      Seriously, I don’t think that you, Billy or your girlfriend Doreen Capslock have ever met the Europe guys and I don’t think that, after visiting the Miranda and Joakim Larsson’s Page on FB, Miranda is who she wants us to think she is. But! I’m dying for you to prove me wrong and shut my big mouth up!
      C’mon guys, I dare you!

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      1. Jon, I’ve been googling. Found this:

        “Speaking of Facebook, beware of Dream Coleman a.k.a. Miranda Tempest.”. Sounds like this goes deeper than we thought.

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      2. Miranda appears to be a phony just like carrieann. All sources say Joey’s wife is Lisa. What’s more I see all sorts of stuff about this Miranda person being a whack job. Who knows? I think we need touched on some very deluded people here.

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        1. Mike. Can I ask you a few important questions?

          1)Have you noticed anyone rooting around your garbage lately?
          2)Have you noticed any personal belongings missing?
          3)Do you hear any feedback when you talk to people on the phone?
          4)Have you ever felt as if your being watched?
          5)Do you have deadbolts and security system?
          6) Do you own a gun of any kind? (The Love Gun cutout does not count)
          7) Are there any relatives you can stay with for a while?
          8) Do you own a bunny and a large cookpot?

          No reason for these questions. This is just routine. Now carry on with your day and don’t worry, you should be ok.

          Oh, and one final question.

          Who would we contact in case of emergency?

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        2. 1. Yes. Just yesterday actually. (for real)
          2. Only toys.
          3. No, just in my head.
          4. I am being watched…
          5. Yes.
          6. No. Unless you count my Phaser.
          7. No. I won’t leave my collection alone.
          8. No bunny! But I’d like to try rabbit.

          Liked by 1 person

        3. Told ya. I knew Joey’s wife’s name was Lisa, but then again I have no clue what’s going on in Tempest’s life and people do get divorced and remarried.
          But as soon as I saw Miranda’s FB-page it felt like something was wrong. She’s a nut-job, alright.
          And I think that Miranda met Doreen Capslock and Billy The Kid while institutionalized because they sound delusional.
          Miranada was talking about men in white coats and meds… Well, it’s not hard to figure out why…

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      3. I think we can all conclude that Miranda Larrson and her friends Billy and DOREEN are all phonies.

        I found the youtube channel for “themirandalarsson”. On that channel is “our duet’ of Tomorrow by Europe.

        All this is, is a horribly dubbed version of the song, right from the album, but with someone else’s vocals added in. It’s so amature it’s hilarious. Echo and phasing galore!

        I can’t seem to paste a link from my phone but search for yourself.

        Miranda is a big phony. Take it to the bank, jack.

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  26. If you see anyone in your area with a t shirt that reads:

    “DAVID COVERDALE RULES AND ROBERT PLANT CAN KISS MY ASS, AND COVERDALE PAGE WAS SO MUCH BETTER THAN LED ZEPPELIN THAT IT IS NOT EVEN FUNNY, AND HIS NAME IS DAVID COVERDALE AND NOT DAVID COVERVERSION, OK, NOW STOP THIS NONSENSE BECASE I DON’T FIND IT FUNNY AND NEITHER DOES MY FRIEND DAVID COVERDALE’S WIFE CARRIEANN, OR WAS IT MIRANDA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”

    Please call 911, burn all of your Tawny Kitaen posters and run as fast as you can to nearest stereo and blast Is this love, as it has been known to calm even the savage beast.

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    1. I think I found the motherlode! A youtube account called JoeyTheRockstar with phony “duets” by Joey and Miranda. Wow. I think there are some seriously damaged folks out there.

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  27. ‘”Paul Is Dead: The Amazing Beatles Conspiracy’, ‘Lennon Lives! Why John Isn’t Dead’ and ‘George! Satan’s Favorite Beatle”’.
    Okay, so listen. Why Lennon Lives ? Why John Isn’t Dead ? Because his spirit possessed The Real Joey Tempest. This demon took Joey’s body and forced Joey’s soul out of the body. This happened 26 years ago. That’s why The Real Joey Tempest is not alive. Demon killed him. It’s Lennon and that’s why he acts, looks like a devil from hell and wrote songs like “Demon head”, “Devil sings the blues”, “You devil you”, “The beast”. There are photos and videos for comparison where similarity is obvious when it comes to looks, music, as a proof. If you want and care to know and see this truth, and you should, you will find them by yourselves.

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