WTF SEARCH TERMS XXXII: Dicks Get Clicks edition
I’ll admit it with no shame: Sometimes I insert certain phrases into reviews, hoping they will eventually garner some hits from bizarre search terms. I did that this week with my Ozzy Osbourne: Ozzmosis review. Trying to strike while the iron was still hot, I claimed that Rick Wakeman’s organ sound on the album was “bigger than Orlando Bloom’s wang”. This may or may not even be true.
Only a day later, I got my first hit for this. The evidence is below.
I admit I’m getting some smug satisfaction from this. Dicks get clicks. At least if they belong to Orlando Bloom (and therefore, by extension, Katy Perry).
A safely anonymous friend of mine said, “I came across the uncensored versions. Oh my. I never thought twice about Orlando being hot or whatever, but dayum. I guess I just needed a mouth…errr eye opener.” I guess lots of people will be searching for Orlando Bloom’s wang.
Here are nine more search terms from recent weeks, none of them nearly as classy as Orlando Bloom’s wang.
- shit hand in shower
- shower poop guy
- russian milf
- www . fuck animals . com
- porn mcgangbang
- marilyn manson sucking dick pictures
- japanporn
- guy porn fuck she male real play mp4 down
- videos of trailer park aex partes
Thanks for joining us for these fucked-up search terms. Whose wang will it be next month? Who knows?
So hang on, these are search terms used here ie searching in mikeladano.com? Or are these search terms that land people here? That I can understand but if searching those terms within ‘this’ site I don’t understand!?
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These are search terms from a search engine, not the search bar here. Crazy stuff still!
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I’ll take “pictures and terms I do not need to see or hear ever” for 500 Alex.
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I could have looked, but I chose not not.
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Shit hand in shower? What the hell? Are there some articles on this blog that I’m missing or something?
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I suspect you may have missed past stories about “Joe Big Nose”, one of our longest serving store managers, and one of the most…”unique” people I’ve ever seen. He used to claim that he shit in the shower, and then backtracked on that claim. The jury is still out.
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I didn’t really get the reference when I read the Ozzy review. Now I do. Eh … thanks?
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Oh don’t thank me. Thank Orlando Bloom and whatever they’re putting in the water down under.
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*packs bags. Looks for flights*
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We should ask Bruce what the hell they are putting in the water down there.
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It’s probably all that sun.
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I’m curious now how the rest of the cast of Lord of the Rings measures up. Hobbit or Balrog-sized?
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Maybe there’s a feature on the special edition DVDs?
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Weirdly enough, on the first film DVD, there IS a hidden special feature where Jack Black pierces his dick with the One Ring.
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…
No words.
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Damn. I think you have more messed up search terms than I do. I’ll have to up my game.
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I suggest comparing something to Bieber’s wang. He followed Orlando in the wang stakes, by appearing nude the day after. (They are rivals.)
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That’s hilarious that ‘wang’ was the term they searched for – 32 editions in, bonus rhyming title this time too!
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And yay, I’m not spam on your site anymore Mike!
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Lemme know if you see more issues….
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I have a feeling that a lot of my stuff gets marked as spam
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Derek Kortepeter came up with the title this time. He’s a generous man!
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OMG that man has a penis? WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO? I, for one, am shocked! … Seriously, its like most people are still in grade school, fascinated with the stupidest shit.
Ah well, it got you a hit… I hope they forgot the cawk and stayed for the rawk.
Also, what is this: “videos of trailer park aex partes”
Video of trailer park axe parties? Or maybe aex is an acronym and a french person wanted part of something? And if it is trailer park axe parties, that seems like a bad idea on so many levels.
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Haha, fantastic!!! Love how someone chose that exact word of ‘wang’. Great search terms all round Mike, keep up the good work! :)
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You probably don’t remember Wang Computers from the 80s?
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No but I really want to!!!!
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One of the Simpsons episodes in the early days had Martin wearing a “WANG Computers” T-shirt.
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I remember that episode! I remember him saying something to the effect of “it distracted everyone away from this t-shirt!”
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YUP! That’s the one.
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Haha, jesus the Simpsons is embedded in my mind forever. Bake ’em away toys.
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Dicks get clicks, haha, that made me laugh.
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Thanks Vinnie! At least they get clicks when it’s Orlando’s dick.
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Well it’s a win, win situation then.
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