This summer is just burning by. This week, we’re burning through five more chapters of Record Store Tales MkII: Getting More Tale!

GETTING MORE TALE #506: I’m Eighteen

The old Record Store was 95% used CDs, bought from the general public.  Like any store selling second hand goods bought pawn-style from walk-ins, we were regulated.  As discussed in Record Store Tales Part 254: You Don’t Need to See My Identification, if you wanted to sell your shit to me, you had to present to me a government issued photo ID.  That’s the law, and I was the sheriff, so show me your damned ID or you don’t get to sell your stolen CDs for weed money, got it!?  It’s not like we were taking IDs just for fun.  The cops really did go over our records (Record Store Tales Part 309: Penmanship), and every once in a while this would result in them catching a thief (Record Store Tales Part 307:  Court).  It was tedious but necessary work.

Part of the law regulating how we went about our business stated that you had to be 18 years or older in order to pawn stuff.  People would complain.  “But they’re just CDs, it’s not like I’m selling you a stolen television.”  Yeah, but the laws don’t differentiate between you selling a TV, a Garth Brooks CD with a cracked case, or an X-Box.  Some customers had a hard time grasping this concept.

To save yourself work, it was always advisable to ask a young-looking customer if they were 18 or older before you started going over their CDs.  If they weren’t 18, you’d ask them to come back with a parent.

Here are some responses from customers who were asked if they were 18:

1. “But I’ll be 18 next week!”  OK, then come back next week.  You can’t vote if you turn 18 “next week”.

2. “Can you call my mom? She’ll tell you I can sell these.” No, you call your mom, and get her in here with her ID.

3. “Did you know it’s illegal to ask someone their age?” Uhh.

4. Several kids just went outside and asked strangers to sell their stuff for them, just like kids trying to get an adult to buy them liquor. Sometimes people would do it. Not exactly the wisest choice. If those CDs were stolen, guess who’s name is attached to them now?

5. You’d get the inevitable people who are flattered that you thought they were that young. “Thanks for the compliment!” Well, you’re very welcome!

The kid that really pissed me off (and this only happened once) was the kid who lied to me about his age before I went ahead and priced all his CDs. He had a lot of stuff, DVDs too, and it took a lot of time and work to go through and price them all. I checked each and every one for quality, I looked them all up in inventory, and I organised them according to value. I made the offer, the kid accepted it, and then I asked him for a piece of his ID.

And then I saw he was only 17.

I was pissed and I didn’t try to hide that. I had wasted all that time going through his shit that he couldn’t even sell, because he lied about his age.

That kid would be in his early 30’s today. I hope he learned to stop being a lying ass!