I don’t like spicy food. I’m a wuss. Mrs LeBrain knows this and usually makes sure our meals cater to my wussy tastes.
This week in her haste, she bought M&M’s Louisiana style chicken wings. In the small print it said “spicy”. She didn’t notice, but “Louisiana” caught my eye and then I noticed the wings were spicy.
“Sweety, these are spicy wings,” I told her.
“They’re the kind we usually get,” she retorted.
I replied “Are you sure? I don’t remember ever seeing Louisiana on the package before.” She’s 1/4 Indian and likes things a lot spicier than I do. But, she was fairly sure we’d bought these wings before and that I liked them. So, stupidly, I cooked the whole box.
I’m sure you can tell where I’m going with this. I ate one wing. Then I was running to the fridge, drinking milk straight from the carton, doing whatever I could to sooth the burning in my wussy mouth. You know what works even better than milk? Table cream. I swallowed a mouth full.
So here we have comedy of errors. Jen can be forgiven for thinking she bought the right wings, but I was a dunderhead for cooking them all! Now she has to finish them! Good thing she likes spicy.
mikeladano.com 
I like the spice. I’ll be right over…😉
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You can have all the wings you want!
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I like some spice (prefer medium to mild) – but I think I’d need the table cream nearby too if I attempted Louisiana style!
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I think you and I would enjoy the same wings. But I sure do like a smokey BBQ sauce.
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I wouldn’t say no to honey garlic!
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I like spicy, it no longer likes me!
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HAH! Well said.
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Oh man, that instant of panic when you get unexpected spicy… even biting into a peppercorn… I can take a bit of spice but not a whole lot. Mainly, I’m with you on this one!
PS I Googled what to do for spicy, and your first instinct was correct…
“1. Drink a glass of milk. When it comes to relief from spicy foods, dairy, especially plain-old milk, does your hot mouth some good. …
2. Drink alcohol. …
3. Take a teaspoon of sugar. …
4. Eat some milk chocolate. …
5. Chew on a slice of bread.”
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I did the milk chocolate thing too. Bread never seems to work for me like good old milk.
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Does chocolate milk work better than plain ol’ white milk, for spicy?
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Haven’t tried that, but one thing I like about the milk is it has that nice bland taste…really helps offset the spice.
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For sure, and better than cold water. I was just wondering if maybe combining the chocolate and the milk would be like a two-fer… time to buy some wings and try it out! ;)
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Plus, you get to eat chocolate! Win!
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Well, I was gonna eat it anyway ;)
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Natch!
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I’m sitting next to you on the Wuss Express!
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Tickets for two please! Ice cream?
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I used to like spicy but somehow got allergic and these days I try and avoid too spicy since I have trouble breathing if the food is too spicy.
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Yikes that’s not good!
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Here’s a kicker. I’m listening to the latest Nickelback and it seems okey. Haven’t heard a filler yet. It’s heavier than usual. I know my reputation is gone now…choke on it.
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Well our friend Jon Wilmenius loves Nickelback and I respect him lots and lots!
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That’s good to hear. I saw them live once and that changed my opinion of them. They truly put on a great show and it’s heavy. Still have trouble listening to their albums ‘cos to me they seem to be full of filler which why this latest one is a nice surprise.
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I can’t do spicy either. It gave me an ulcer as a kid. But i also just like tasting my food!
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Me too! There is so much more to flavour than just heat! I get zero enjoyment from heat.
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