Reviews

DUAL REVIEW: The Trashmen – “Surfin’ Bird” / Family Guy “I Dream of Jesus”

THE FAMILY GUY: “I Dream Of Jesus” (Episode 2, Season 7)

My buddy Chris and I seldom agree on anything to do with TV shows. (Two and a Half Men? Seriously Chris?) One fact that we do agree on: “I Dream Of Jesus” had the potential to be the best Family Guy episode of all time. They had it going in the first half, only to blow it in the second.

In a nutshell: Peter gets all nostalgic for the song “Surfin’ Bird” by The Trashmen. He acquires a record and torments his family by playing and singing the song so much that he is literally driving Stewy and Brian insane. To me this was Family Guy at its absolute best.

That was the first half. The second half involved Peter befriending Jesus and the episode just got weird from there. Chris and I both agree: The proper way to end this episode would have been to have another giant chicken fight. Bird is the word. Chicken fight. It could have been perfect!

3/5 stars

surfin

THE TRASHMEN: “Surfin’ Bird” (1963)

I love the oldies. I always have. It probably came from watching movies like Christine and American Grafitti. This is right up my alley. For 1963 this is absolutely raging! “Surfin’ Bird” (actually a combination of two other songs) is rock and roll! I defy you to not get this stuck in your head!

I love stuff like this. If I was a young teenager in 1963, I would have wanted this record.

5/5 stars

Part 34: SPECIAL! “Bands That I Think Suck” FROM THE ARCHIVES!

I was cleaning out the closet two weeks ago.  I found a folder, full of old writing.  I found stuff that I had written with chums Danesh and Andy back in highschool.  But most interestingly, I found this.  This is not my first published work (that would be an article about turtles from grade 2 in the local newspaper).  This may be, however, my first published work along the lines of what I’m doing now.

Dating back to 1995, my second year at the store, I was already getting jaded!  This is my very first music article:  “Bands That I Think Suck”.  It was published in the University of Waterloo paper Scientific Notation as a comedy piece.  Thanks to Abbas Rizvi for doing so, wherever you are.

I still stand by most of this, but I have since grown to like Pink Floyd.  (See:  Part 28: The Boy Who Killed Pink Floyd). 

OK…ON WITH THE EMBARASSMENT!

REVIEW: Alice Cooper – Old School (1964-1974) (4 CD/DVD/LP/7″ SINGLE & BOOK)

ALICE COOPER – Old School (1964-1974) (2011)

This might be the last time I obsessive-compulsively buy one of these crazy expensive box sets. With fresh memories of how beautiful the AC/DC Backtracks Deluxe box set was, I eagerly placed my preorder. I mean, Alice Cooper 1964-1974! The golden years! The orginal Alice Cooper Band! When it finally arrived I was blown away by the packaging, bonus goodies, and other finds.

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However, musically, this is almost not even worth owning. You have to be a massive, massive, die hard Cooper fan to want to hear a whole five minutes of Bob Ezrin’s kids giggling and singing during the School’s Out sessions. You have to be a masocist to want to hear that horrible loud feedback that just goes on forever during a seven minute run through the same song. The radio ads are nice, but hardly what we as collectors want out of a box set of this stature. Sprinkled in with this junk are the odd good live takes, such as “Under My Wheels” in New York 1973. Unfortunately there are just as many early tracks from the Zappa years that aren’t nearly as good, nor recorded that well. Everything on the first two odds n’ sods discs are either live, rough sketches or demos, studio sessions, or radio ads. Lots of repeat too — there are three takes of “Muscle Of Love”, you will hear “School’s Out” three times in different forms, and “I’m Eighteen” three times as well.

The third CD is, disappointingly an interview disc. It’s a shame to spend this much money and only get three CDs worth of music (the fourth CD is a live one). I did enjoy hearing Alice discuss Muscle of Love and the end of the original band. The other surviving band members, and Ezrin, participate in the discussion.

The only real treasure here musically is the fourth CD, a 10 song set from the Killers tour in 1971. This set is duplicated on a 180 gram vinyl enclosed within. It is from bootleg sources, but where sound quality suffers, the band makes up for it in youth. Lots of static and noise but the band is absolutely on fire in a way that they are not on the first two CDs. I also like that they duplicated the look of 70’s bootleg vinyl with the packaging.

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Finally, there is a 7″ single, heavy vinyl, a replica of Cooper’s first single from 1967 as Nazz. The tracks are “Wonder Who’s Loving Her Now?” and “Lay Down And Die Goodbye”.  (I only wish that there was a way to download this in mp3 format with the purchase of this set.)  See scan below for complete tracklist for the entire box set.  LeBrain is nothing if not helpful!

There is a documentary DVD included as well, which although containing lots of fun vintage clips, is very poor value for the money. You are treated to — for the second time now! — the same interview that you just finished listening to! And not only that, but they chose to shoot the interview with the original band in a noisy maintenance room. Why?

SAM_1964

Now, packaging wise, this box set is a whole other beast!

The box itself is shaped like a kid’s school desk. The old wooden kind that they had in the 50’s, with the top that opens up and the ink well. It’s hinged and it opens where the school desk would. It is very sturdy and the hinge is metal. Inside are, as discussed:

The 12″ vinyl of the live 1971 show.
The 7″ single reproduction.
1 DVD, Old School 1964-1974
4 CDs, Old School 1964-1974

There is a yearbook, with the whole story told by multiple sources. However, a few things are brushed over, such as the alcohol problems that were setting in. Alice was a full blown alcoholic, a 2 beer first thing in the morning kind of guy. His guitar player Glen Buxton was so wasted that they had him onstage with his guitar turned down to 0, and having a guest guitarist play way off to the side. So none of this is in the yearbook. Great photos though, particular of Alice’s own yearbook. The entire band were a highschool band. All five guys. Lots of great photos from this era, and on to the mid-70’s.

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There is a booklet, inside of which is a reproduction concert ticket from 1972 for Wembley. (£1.00 admission back then apparently, imagine that today!) There is also a 1971 tour book (Killers tour), a complete reproduction, and a whole bunch of 8 1/2 x 11 poster reproductions. Lastly there is a replica setlist, which is nothing special. The thing I don’t like about this booklet is that you have to be very careful when you put items back into it, or when you fold everything back together you’ll dogear something.

As I said in the beginning, I think this is the last time I buy one of these box sets compulsively. I knew the music was likely to be iffy and it was. I probably should have saved my money, although the box is a beautiful conversation piece.

2/5 stars, regrettably.

REVIEW: Black Sabbath – Heaven and Hell (deluxe edition)

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BLACK SABBATH – Heaven and Hell (2011 deluxe edition)

Of the Sabbath reissues, Heaven and Hell has proven to be one of the most anticipated, but also one of the most skimpy. Anticipated, because in addition to the usual B-sides, this one also includes some previously unreleased live tracks. Skimpy, because the bonus disc only has a minimal seven songs on it.

Even the most diehard of Ozzy fanatics usually begrudgingly concede that Heaven and Hell is a damn fine album. Powerfully heavy, but clean, slick and to the point, Heaven and Hell is the only Black Sabbath album to feature the lineup of Ronnie James Dio on lead vocals, and original members Tony Iommi, Geezer Butler, and Bill Ward. As such it has a different vibe from Mob Rules, due to Bill’s swing and thrift. Nobody can swing like Bill Ward, and I believe that Vinny Appice would agree with me. There is nary a weak song on the whole album (although “Lady Evil” comes close as far as I’m concerned). There are no less than two crucial singles, in “Neon Knights” and “Die Young”, both trademark Dio speed rockers. There is also, of course, the epic title track. A riff so famous that it rivals such classics as “Iron Man” and “Paranoid”. Let us not forget that when Tony Iommi appeared at the Freddie Mercury tribite concert back in 1992, it was “Heaven and Hell” that Brian May chose to introduce Iommi with, not “Iron Man” or “Paranoid”!

Really, Heaven and Hell is a perfect Sabbath album, perhaps the only truly perfect Sabbath album besides the crucial first six with Ozzy. While I love Born Again (my favourite album of all time by anybody) even I must admit that its production values make the record an ugly duckling. No such problem here. Martin Birch has expertly recorded the band. His production is not the wall of sludge of early Sabbath.  It is a clearer, leaner beast, but no less mean.  The teeth are sharp indeed.  (This is before Birch allegedly succumbed to cocaine on Mob Rules.)

The bonus disc begins with the two live B-sides, “Children of the Sea” and “Heaven and Hell” itself, both (in my opinion) superior to the later live versions due to the presence of Bill Ward. “Heaven and Hell” is clipped off at the end however, I believe this is the version from the 7″ single, not the 12″. (But fear not, the full 12″ version is later!) Then there’s a 7″ mono version of “Lady Evil”, the only song I didn’t need to hear twice. Although I have to admit I had no idea they were still making mono records in 1980.

Finally there are the previously unreleased live songs! All the best tunes, recorded live in 1980 with Bill Ward on drums, and in this batch of songs is also the 12″ version of “Heaven and Hell”, the full 12 minute version that I have on the “Die Young” single. This has all the solos and Ronnie’s singalong vocals.

So there you have it. Not as much running time as Mob Rules, but Mob Rules also didn’t include anything that wasn’t unreleased.

5/5 stars. A landmark album, and this is the version to own. Oh, and the remastering sounds great!

REVIEW: Orianthi – Believe (II)

I’d like to give a shout-out to Tommy Morais, who requested this review!  Check out his Amazon Reviews, he is one of their top rated reviewers!

I first became aware of Oriantha when Alice Cooper hired her as his new lead guitarist, replacing Damon Johnson.  Doing my research, I saw that she had even worked with Steve Vai and Michael Jackson!  This meant, the lady could play!

Because I don’t do things small, I decided to pick up the Japanese import of Believe (II) to check out her skills.  The Japanese import contains 3 bonus tracks:  two versions of a Cream cover, “Sunshine of Your Love”, and a useless remix of “According To You”.

ORIANTHI – Believe (II) Japanese import with bonus tracks (2009)

I’m not really into this kind of pop rock anymore, but Orianthi does fill this more aggressive pop rock void that Avril used to occupy.  Believe (II) reminds me of that one sincerely good Avil album, the second one, in that it’s undoubtedly rock yet melodic and well recorded, not overproduced.

What separates this girl from the rest of them is that her chops on the guitar are absolutely stunning.  Each song has a solo spot, well composed, and expertly executed.  This girl is a shredder who happens to play commercial pop rock.  Well, OK.  I can dig it.

The best tracks to me seem to the be chosen singles:  “According to You”, “Shut Up and Kiss Me”, and the instrumental “Highly Strung”, featuring Oriantha trading licks with Vai.  There’s also a decent version of “Missing You” by John Waite, which, I guess, I like better than the original, since I really don’t like John Waite.

The songs are written by the usual suspects, song doctors new and old including Desmond Child.  There are a couple tracks though that are not messed with by song doctors, and I hope that Orianthi is moving more in that direction in the future.

Orianthi has a good but not an especially different sounding voice from all the other girls rocking it out there these days.  Her range is good, she has power, just not a particularly unique sound or style.  I also can’t help but think she’s trying to sing “American”.

I think it’s a good enough album for this stage in her career, and I think she is going to grow by leaps and bounds, touring the world with Alice Cooper.  But before Orianthi makes another solo album, I hope she has the opportunity to record with Cooper.

For Believe (II): 3.5/5 stars

REVIEW: Killer Dwarfs – Dirty Weapons (1990)

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KILLER DWARFS – Dirty Weapons (1990 CBS)

I remember when the Dwarfs opened for Maiden on their Seventh Tour of a Seventh Tour. They began playing a new song on that tour called “Nothing Gets Nothing”. It was fast and almost thrash metal in its delivery. The Dwarfs were heavying up!

Two years later, when Dirty Weapons finally hit the stores, it wasn’t thrash metal, but it was an up-ratchet from the previous album (and major label debut) Big Deal. It was also an improvement in sound, production, and song quality in general. This album is the Dwarfs very best. It is near-flawless. It is a must have for any true fan of Canadian metal.

Highlights include:

  • The title track and first single, with irrestible chorus.
  • “Last Laugh”, a great hard rocker, memorable and tough.
  • The angry “Comin’ Through”. “Outta my way, I’m coming through, I know what I want and I know how to get it!”
  • The melodic and rootsy “Not Foolin'”. “Not foolin’ me, you’re nothing but a sleeze”.
  • The atmospheric and slow closer “Want It Bad”.
  • The power ballad “Doesn’t Matter” which should have been the biggest hit of their entire career. Alas, it was one year too early as the following summer was the summer of the power ballads. But the band believed in it so much, they re-released it on the next album. Which, by then, was far too late, as grunge had hit in a big way.

I’ve heard people say that Russ Dwarf’s vocals are similar to Geddy Lee’s.  I’m not sure if I agree, I never saw it that way at the time.  All I know is, this is a great album, my favourite, and one that kept me rockin’ in the early 1990’s.

5/5 stars

REVIEW: Alice Cooper – I’ll Bite Your Face Off 7″ single

ALICE COOPER – “I’ll Bite Your Face Off” picture disc 7″ single (2011)

FACEOFFIf you’re a Cooper fan, this is totally worth buying.  It’s a beatiful 7″ with Ross Halfin photo on one side, and tracklist on the other.  “I’ll Bite Your Face Off” is a nice looking disc to start with.

The song itself is an uptempo rocker from the recent Welcome 2 My Nightmare.  It’s a fairly strightforward song, unlike some of the more quirky songs from the album.  As such, it makes good single material, but it’s not among the best tunes on the album.

“I’ll Bite Your Face Off” was co-written by Neal Smith, of the original Alice Cooper band.  It was performed by all the surviving members of that band, too:  Smith (drums), Michael Bruce (guitar) and Dennis Dunaway (bass).  It is their first recording together since 1974.  Wow.

On the flipside is a great live version from the Download festival. This recording is not available anywhere else. It features a great Steve Hunter guitar solo and a truly rocking backing band.  If you want to complete your Welcome 2 My Nightmare collection, I’m afraid you’re going to need this single!

Awesome. 5/5  stars.

REVIEW: Led Zeppelin – self-titled box set (1990)

LED ZEPPELIN – self-titled box set (1990, retail price approx $60 CAD at press time)

It was the fall of 1990, and I was on the verge of graduating highschool and entering the “real” world. However, my musical development was way far behind — everybody’s was, in 1990. Poison, Whitesnake and Motley Crue ruled the charts: All bands, one way or another, influenced by Zeppelin, by the way. Yet, I had avoided actually hearing a Zeppelin studio recording. MuchMusic’s endless showing of The Song Remains The Same had cooled any interest I might have had in this great band. I really didn’t like that concert, and I still don’t listen to it.

In 1990, pop rock was showing its first signs of death and I was becoming interested in bluesier, more authetic sounds. I was beginning to listen to FM radio and I heard a song called “Travelling Riverside Blues”. The slide guitar was eloquent and infectious. Immediately, I wondered what I was missing.

A friend, Danesh, who also had never owned a Zeppelin album in his life, picked up the box set released that fall. I asked him how it was. Cryptically, he responded, “It’s good.” It went on my Christmas list and I anxiously opened it on December 25, 1990.

I didn’t get to start plowing through the thing until the next day, after the turkey and Christmas guests were gone.  On the 26th, I woke up early.  I read the liner notes and I listened to the whole thing in one marathon almost-5-hour-session. Today, this is the running order that I associate these Zeppelin songs in, not the original studio album order.  I listened to the box set in these marathon sessions 3 times during the Christmas break!

This was actually the first box set I ever owned.  Not too many bands I liked had one, back then.  In fact I think the only other box on the market at the time that even slightly interested was The Ultimate by Tommy Bolin.

I loved the cover art.  I was obsessed with the crop circle phenomenon.  I bought a T-shirt with this design on it a few weeks later.  upon seeing the cover, my friend and fellow Zeppelin fan Andreas said “Figures, Zeppelin created everything else in rock, why not crop circles too?”

For the record, this is still no substitute for owning all the Zeppelin studio albums. They have a life all their own. However, Jimmy Page carefully assembled this running order to breathe new life into these tracks, and breathe they do.

I can’t imagine a better opener than “Whole Lotta Love”. It is a one-two punch followed by “Heartbreaker”, and then “Communication Breakdown” takes things to an out-of-control pace. Geniously, Page followed this with “Babe I’m Gonna Leave You”.  Total switch of pace, and another brilliant side to the band.  But yet even on this, Plant refused to tame down his vocals, straining at the leash to let hell loose.  I was hooked. I couldn’t even fathom a set of songs better than these. Better late than never, right?

I was entranced by the swirling “Kashmir”, a song I will never tire from.  I could not believe the power of “What Is and What Should Never Be”.  The Rush-like complexity of “Achilles Last Stand”.  The tender acoustics of “Going to California”.  The muddy, churning synth of “In The Evening”.  The dark, foreboding blues of “When the Levee Breaks”.  The fun, upbeat reggae of “D’Yer Mak’er” (still don’t really know what that means).  The tropical heat of “Fool In the Rain”.  The ominous “No Quarter”.  Song after song, hour after hour, Led Zeppelin continued to reveal new layers of this band to me.

The only songs that I didn’t care much for, and still consider also-rans, are a lot of the tracks from Coda, their posthumous outtakes release.  I felt stuff like the punk rock of “Wearing and Tearing” and the folky “Poor Tom” were not as great as the A-listers.  While they are not without their merits, I don’t believe that today they can stand up against “The Immigrant Song” or “Tangerine”.

We kids didn’t really get the lyrics, or why Robert was singing about wearing flowers in your hair.  We found the lyrics amusing, quaint.

Today I own all the individual Zeppelin albums in box set form (The Complete Studio Recordings), but I still listen to this box and its sequel, 1993’s Box Set 2. When I have 5 hours at home, this is the way I prefer to go. This box set creates a journey. Each disc is a journey with a distinct opening and a distinct end, but the entire running order is like that as well.   There are distinct sections, moods, and movements in the box set.  Witness “All My Love” as the final track. I couldn’t imagine a better way to end a five hour journey than that hopeful fade out.

Then Bonzo died and the hope was gone.

Interestingly, even though the unreleased/rare tracks here were later reissued on the Complete Studio Recordings (they were “Traveling Riverside Blues”, “White Summer/Black Mountainside”, and “Hey Hey What Can I Do”), one slipped through the cracks and to the best of my knowledge is only available on this set:  Moby Dick/Bonzo’s Montreaux”, an interesting remix (today we would call this a “mash-up”) of Bonzo’s two drum solos intertwined.  It is not on the Complete Studio box. It’s not because it’s inferior or redundant, in my opinion. Jimmy lovingly put this track together as a tribute to his friend 10 years after his death, and it works brilliantly.  It neither replaces the originals, nor gets in their way, because it’s more a cool showcase of Pagey’s mixing skill, if you asked me.

10 years gone? It was hard for me to believe that Zeppelin had been gone for only 10 years at that time. It seemed to me like they were part of pre-history, something that predated everything I’d known. Yet all the bands I knew cited Zeppelin as an influence, from Kiss on down to the newest groups, like Cinderella (who worked with John Paul Jones). They were a part of my rock and roll soul without me even knowing it. Hearing this box for the first time was like discovering a part of myself!

Liner notes are excellent, and until reading The Hammer of the Gods, was pretty much my sole source of Led Zeppelin information and photographs.   They are ample, and include an essay by Cameron Crowe.

Interestingly, even though this set has theoretically been supplanted by newer, superior sounding collections, it remains in print and reasonably priced.  There must be something to it, I guess!

5/5 stars

Part 26: You Wanted the Best, You Got the Best…

My Amazon reviewing buddy Tommy Morais suggested that we talk a bit about 80’s Kiss.  And why not?  I think 80’s Kiss is an under appreciated era.  Sure, some of those albums are under par.  But some of those albums are also among the best that Kiss have ever done.

It’s a good suggestion, so I’ll go with it.  Here ya go, Tommy.  80’s Kiss.  My take. In the order I got heard the music.

80’s KISS

I grew up in the 80’s.  While I knew “Rock and Roll All Nite”, my real introduction to Kiss was essentially “Heaven’s On Fire” and “Thrill’s in the Night”.  I saw the videos on Much and was surprised to discover that Kiss were not wearing makeup anymore.  And the songs were rocking and good.  Later on, a buddy brought over Lick It Up, and played, “And On The 8th Day”.  I said, “That doesn’t sound like the same guy singing,” and they said it wasn’t; they explained it was Gene Simmons (the scary looking one).

I was curious and started taping the music videos. 

Asylum (1985)

This wasn’t my first Kiss album, but it was my first 80’s Kiss album.  I had already acquired Hotter Than Hell and Alive (See Part 3: My First Kiss.)

My dad bought it for me at HiWay Market, in Kitchener, where the Zehrs is now.  It didn’t come with lyrics so I had to try and figure out what they were singing, a task I found very difficult. 

I knew “Tears Are Falling” already from the video, and very quickly my next favourite song became “Uh! All Night”.  I thought that the title was embarassingly bad even then, but the riff was so damn catchy.  Much to my surprise, “Uh! All Night” became the next video, loaded with girls.  I had no problem with that.  My next favourite song, “Who Wants to Be Lonely” became the next video.  I realized I had a knack for predicting the next Kiss singles, something I did without fail for the next three albums in a row.

The other two strongest songs on this album are Paul’s “King of the Mountain”, with Eric Carr’s thunderous drum intro, and Gene’s “Secretly Cruel”.  The rest of the songs are in my opinion pretty much filler, although “Radar for Love” isn’t bad.

Animalize (1984)

I taped Animalize off George, next door.  I taped it on a crappy 120 minute Scotch, it was all I had.  It sounded awful, and I think that might be part of the reason why I consider Animalize to be Kiss’ weakest. 

I love the two singles, “Heaven’s on Fire”, and especially “Thrills in the Night”.  My next favourite song is “Get All You Can Take”.  (I had no idea as a kid that the chorus went, “What fucking difference does it make?”  Like I said, I couldn’t really make out Kiss lyrics that well, and I had no lyric sheets.)  I think the rest of the album is very weak, especially when it comes to Gene songs.  “Let me put my log in your fireplace.”  Yow!

Lick It Up (1983)

This was the next 80’s Kiss album I acquired, on cassette, for Christmas of 1985.  My parents bought me a brand new duel tape deck, a Sanyo, and this was the first thing played in it.  I loved Lick It Up.  By now, I knew a lot of these songs from the Kiss Animalize Live Uncensored home video that I taped off George.  Yes this was my first time hearing the studio versions of “Young and Wasted” and “Fits Like A Glove”.   I quickly grew to love “Dance All Over Your Face” and of course “And On The 8th Day”.  Unlike the previous two 80’s Kiss albums, this one was loaded with excellent Gene material.  Finally, I grew to love two Paul songs:  “Exciter” and “A Million To One”.  Only the filler song “Gimme More” really fails to excite me today.

Lick It Up is the first Kiss album featuring their bare faces, played up by Kiss appearing on the front cover in just their every day street clothes of jeans and jackets.  The guitars are performed by Vinnie Vincent, a brilliant player.  When Vinnie is restrained, like he was with Kiss, his tones and solos are absolutely stunning and perfect.  When left to his own devices, he comes up with stuff like Vinnie Vincent Invasion.

This is, to me, tied for best Kiss album of the 80’s.  It is tied with.,.

Creatures of the Night (1982)

I taped this one off George as well.  It swiftly became a favourite.  Chock full of solid rockers, I swiftly found myself drawn to “War Machine” and “Rock and Roll Hell”, both angry and rebellious Gene songs.  There are really no weak tracks off this one.  I think “I Love It Loud” gets pretty boring after a while, but it’s still a classic Kiss song.  The drum sound on the original mix of this album is insane.  If you have the CD with the non-makeup cover, then you have a remixed version.  The drums are toned down.  The original is the superior version, and the one to own (if you only own one.  I don’t, I have both).

Although Ace Frehley was on the original album cover and in the video, we all knew that Ace was essentially out of the band by this time and didn’t play on Creatures. 

Unmasked (1980)

This, the second of the “Kissco” albums, is not particularly one of my favourites.  Even as kids, we found it pretty poppy, with not enough rock and roll.  We liked “Is That You?”, “Talk To Me”, and “Torpedo Girl”, but we found the rest of the album to be incredibly weak.  Much like Creatures, we knew that Peter Criss did not play on Unmasked, even though he was in the video.  The drums are ably performed by Anton Fig, who had previously played on Ace Frehley and Dynasty.

I loved the cover.  I know Gene and Paul don’t think much of the cover now, but you have to get this one on vinyl.  Playing off their comic book excesses, the cover are panels from a comic book, involving Kiss finally unmasking.  (Get it?)  And then they remove their masks, only to reveal that underneath, they still look exactly the same!  Which played into the face that although fans were begging to see Kiss’ faces, they weren’t going to take off the makeup just yet.

Music From “The Elder” (1981)

As the Kiss collection started to complete itself, I realized I eventually needed The Elder.  George dutifully taped Bob and I both copies.  He wrote the titles on virtually illegibly, and we ended up phoning him to ask him what the hell the songs were called!  “George, what does this say?  ‘Escape from the Ish’?  What is that?!”  And why did he write the album title as Music From?

George straightened us out, it was a concept album and that was the title on the actual cover.  “Escape From the Island” was an Ace Frehley instrumental and one of the only songs we liked.  We found the album pretty weak, but there were songs we kept coming back to, such as “The Oath”.  It was a pretty weird sounding album, then and now.  I mean, not too many three chord rock bands make ambitious concept albums, and the result is a blocky, awkward but intriguing mess of songs.  Yet I love this album!  Weird, eh?  Hated it then, though!

Incidentally, if you owned this album, and the concept made no sense, there’s a possible reason:  On the original American releases, the songs are in the wrong order.  The record company felt you needed to start with a rocker like “The Oath”, but the “correct” tracklisting (now available remastered) has “Fanfare” and “Just A Boy” as the start of the story.

Killers (1982)

Bob brought this German LP with the backwards “KIZZ” logo back with him from his summer vacation in 1986.  He returned with Killers and Alive II, which I recorded from him.  I eventually bought his copy of Killers, so this very copy I’m talking about is the one I own today.

Killers was a Europeans hits disc, pink cover, with the band in their Elder-era outfits, headbands andf ponytails.  However it represents a return to the rocking Kiss sounds of old, as it contained four new songs, all sung by Paul:  “I’m a Legend Tonight” (love it!), “Partners In Crime” (meh), “Nowhere To Run” (fave!), and “Down On Your Knees” (pretty decent uptempo Paul rocker). 

Bob and I especially loved “I’m A Legend Tonight”, but “Nowhere To Run” became a close second, and eventually overtook it. 

As a compilation, it’s a good one.  It has all the hits, including the live version of “Rock N’ Roll All Nite” from Alive!  The CD I have is from Japan, and has two extra songs not on the European one:  “Shandi” and “Escape From The Island”, which was edited off their version of The Elder.

 

Crazy Nights (1987)

For the first time, there was a two-year gap between Kiss albums.  Crazy Nights was a unique album experience for me.  It was the first time I had waited patiently for a Kiss album.  Asylum, which had come out in 1985, was already out when I first started seriously getting into Kiss.  George kept me up to date on all the Kiss news.  That summer, he told me that the album title was Crazy Nights, and that Paul had been writing on keyboards.  Keyboards, in Kiss?

The day the album came out, George got it on LP, and I recorded it as usual.  We listened to it at his place.  I wasn’t sure what to think.  These were all new songs and it didn’t really sound great.  The title track and first single was a lot more pop, we noticed.  Some of the Gene songs were just awful, and some Paul songs, not better.  “I’ll Fight Hell To Hold You” is one that I felt never sounded quite right. 

Little did I know as a fan that Gene Simmons had pretty much clocked out by this time.  He had gone Hollywood and Paul was steering the ship.  As a result, Crazy Nights is pretty Paul heavy, with only a couple decent Gene songs.  “Good Girl Gone Bad” is the best one, a slow burner about a young girl that Gene claims is the “best love I ever had”.  “No No No” is…well, I won’t go as far as to call it a good song, but it was one of the few fast rockers, and featured a smoking hot solo from Bruce.

Once again I predicted the next single, the ballad “Reason To Live”.  Ballads were huge at the time, but that one was not.  It failed to rocket up the charts, maybe because it was too light.  Too many keyboards.  Paul was no longer playing his guitar in videos, he was just wearing it.  This bugged me to no end.  It really, really bugged me.  Not to mention Kiss’ new outfits were anything but cool. 

For the first time, there was a third video, the much better “Turn On The Night”, a Bon Jovi-esque pop rocker with a very catchy chorus and Bruce solo.  Paul wore his guitar again in the video, but at least it was a rocker.  And my favourite song on the album.

Smashes, Thrashes & Hits (1988)

Rumours of breakup swirled in 1988, after the less-than-successful Crazy Nights tour and album.  I hoped and prayed for Kiss to return to rock.  Then, Gene Simmons co-hosted the Pepsi Power Hour in 1988.  He talked mostly about his new label, Simmons Records.  He was promoting his first two singings:  A “funk-urban” singer name Laz Netto (sp?) and a rock band from the ashes of Giuffria and Quiet Riot called House of Lords.  This worried me.  Clearly, Gene’s focus was not on Kiss.

He also announced the forthcoming release of a new hits album called Smashes, Thrashes & Hits.  It was to feature two new songs produced by Paul Stanley, he said, “You Put the X in Sex” (sic), and “(You Make Me) Rock Hard”.  He also said there was to be a new version of Beth, with Eric Carr singing.  At the time, to me, this didn’t bother me as a concept.  I liked Eric’s voice, but he had never sung lead on an album before, so this should be cool.  Unfortunately, Eric put no rasp in his voice, which I think sank his version.

As for the two new singles/videos?  Not only was “Let’s Put the X in Sex” pure pop again, but Paul wasn’t even wearing his guitar in the video!  He was just…dancing!  Dancing!!  “Rock Hard” was a better song, but once again, Paul was dancing.  And Gene?  He was completely clocked out.  Not only did he look like a transvestite, but he couldn’t even lip sync the lyrics correctly.  Watch the video.  Check it out.  At around 1:50, the lyric, “You turn me ’round”.  You can clearly see Gene mouth the words as “You turn me up”.  You doesn’t even know the words to the damn song, he was so clocked out at that point.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gQj1LuY5b8M

Hot In The Shade (1989)

Paul did a brief solo tour with Bob Kulick and Eric Singer, and promised Kiss would be back later that year with a new album.  Paul’s promise was true, and in the fall I sat and watched the new Kiss video, “Hide Your Heart”.  I hoped it would not suck.

It didn’t!

Paul was playing a guitar again!  And it wasn’t some candy-coloured modern guitar, it was a vintage one.  The song was catchy with a good chorus, but was not overtly pop.  The video wasn’t about hot girls anymore, but had a story to it.  Perfect!  Kiss had finally started to catch up with where I thought they should have been going.

I picked up the album on cassette in Pickering, Ontario while on school field trip to the nuclear plant, of all things.  We stopped at a mall for lunch, and I picked it up at an A&A.  It was long and it took a while to absorb, but I immediately loved the pedal steel solo that opened the album.  That’s what I’m talking about!  It might not have been anything vintage Kiss would have done, but at least it was about the roots of rock again, not keyboards and ballads.

Once again I predicted the singles:  “Forever”, the acoustic ballad, was a great song with yet another killer Bruce solo.   You had to have at least one ballad back then, and Kiss gave us just one out of the 15 songs.  And it was an acoustic ballad, not a keyboard one.  Bonus.

The third and final and most confusing single was “Rise To It”.  Confusing because Gene and Paul put the makeup back on in the video.   In a flashback scene, Paul and Gene sit in a dressing room putting on their makeup, discussing the future of the band.  Could they survive without makeup?  Paul says yes, Gene says he’s nut.  Eric and Bruce, backs turned to the camera, “play” Ace and Peter.  Flash to the present day, Kiss kicking ass without makeup at a live show, then back to the dressing room.  “Yeah, I guess you’re right,” Gene concedes, as they walk out together, fully suited up.

What were they trying to tell us?

It is known now that Kiss were attempting to woo Ace back into the band.  It would be a return to makeup, and the Elder lineup of Stanley/Simmons/Carr/Frehley for a tour.  For the first time, Kiss did not tour to support the album when it was released, but waited until 1990.  By then, the album had petered out, and Ace had declined.  The co-headlining tour with Whitesnake culminated in a disasterours show in Toronto where Paul trashed Whitesnake to the crowd for not letting Kiss use their full stage gear.  The crowd in turn booed Whitesnake, the first time, according to Steve Vai, he had ever been booed on stage.  He had walked onto the stage in front of a crowd cheering, “Yngwie, Yngwie, Yngwie…”, but had never been booed, until Paul trashed Whitesnake on stage.  Kiss did return later that year with their full Sphynx stage show.

Anyway, that was the 90’s.  As far as the 80’s ended, I thought and still think that Hot In the Shade was a step back in the right direction.  At 15 songs, it was too bogged down with filler, and I don’t think it sounded that great.  I never liked Bruce’s guitar sound on it, I felt it was unappealling.  I liked that Eric Carr had a proper lead vocal on his own song (“Little Caesar”) and I liked that the album ended with a seriously heavy rocker, Gene’s thrash-like “Boomerang”.  I was no longer embarassed by the band.

When they would finally return again in the 90’s, they had lost Eric Carr.  But they had also righted the good ship Kiss, with the excellent Revenge. 

But that, dear friends, is another story….

REVIEW: Helix – Good To The Last Drop / S.E.X. Rated (original cassingle!)

HELIX – “Good To The Last Drop” (1990 cassette single)

One thing though that I thought I lost was all my cassette singles. They were stored in a shoebox at my parents’ house, and I thought I lost them in a move. In that box of cassette singles were some tunes that could not be replaced on CD, because they don’t exist on CD. One is the original version of “S.E.X. Rated”, by Helix. There was a remake done on 1999’s B-Sides album with the original lineup, and it’s awesome. There is however an earlier version from the “Good To The Last Drop” cassette single that is early enough that it had to be Paul Hackman on guitar. It was noticably different from the 1999 version, and I have hunted and hunted to find a CD version, but none exist. I tracked down a couple “Good To The Last Drop” CD singles, but they contain just one track, the Remix version of “Good To The Last Drop”, which they later re-released on a Best Of  CD.

“Good to the Last Drop”, the remix version, is superior to the album version.  The main difference is that catchy keyboard hook.  That’s not there on the album version.  It’s not available on many CD compilations now, although its B-side is not.

In 2007, my parents were digging away in the basement and they found the box of cassette singles. There are a couple other winners in there too. But the Helix one is there, and in remarkably great shape, probably because BOTH tracks are on each side, so you’d play the tape half as much.  The integrity of the tape would presumably last longer. At least if one side starts to sound bad, you can play the other side.

The song is really different from the other version, it starts with a spoken-word intro. Somebody that sounds like a radio DJ says, “Hi, this is Johnny (something?). And this is for the girl that wants me to love her for her mind. But I want to love her because of what she doesn’t mind.” And then the band kicks in, and the lyrics to the song are the same as the ’99 version. Sounds like it could be Fritz on drums. On the cassette sleeve, the track is credited as “Produced by Helix” as opposed to Helix and Tony Bongiovi, as the album was. Recorded at a separate session perhaps? Daryl’s bass sounds great, punchy and driving. In general the track sounds great.

I like how the cover says “INCLUDES BONUS UNRELEASED TRACK”. The back cover reveals the tape was released in 1990, probably late 1990 if I remember, because I seem to remember getting this tape around or during Christmas holidays 1990.

Incidentally, I emailed Brian Vollmer about this version of “S.E.X. Rated” and asked if there was a CD version ever coming.  He said he can’t remember anything about another version.  I asked Daryl Gray, and his response is below:

try the CD version of Long Way To Heaven album…

Nope.  Sorry Daryl!  Not there, got that one too.  So there you go!  A Helix rarity that even the band doesn’t seem to know about.  Cool.

5/5 stars