Alice Cooper

REVIEW: Alice Cooper – Welcome 2 My Nightmare (2011)

Alright folks, dig in, I plan to get as detailed as possible as to the different bonus tracks and versions.  Enjoy.

I make a point of trying to collect all the different bonus tracks for an album, if I really like it.  For this review, we’ll be taking a look at the contents of the Classic Rock Fan Pack edition, the Canadian retail version, the Best Buy version, the iTunes version, and the vinyl.

 

ALICE COOPER – Welcome 2 My Nightmare (2011)

At long last, we have Welcome 2 My Nightmare. Yes, it really does harken back to the Alice Cooper sound of old. Yes, you can definitely tell when members of the original band are involved. Yes, these songs are very diverse.

In fact Alice’s sounds from many eras are revisited: disco Alice, rocker Alice, campy showtunes Alice, a slight nod and a wink to the stone ages and some Zappa-like inspiration. There’s even surf-rock in “Ghouls Gone Wild”, and elsewhere, a Kip Winger cameo. Unfortunately there also a bit of a modern touch: an unfortunate cameo by the talentless Kesha.

Regardless, Alice and Ezrin (let’s give credit where credit is due, Ezrin is the George Martin of this album) have created here a modern masterpiece, a great record to cap Alice’s modern career with one more undenialble winner. Welcome 2 My Nightmare contains a few musical interludes and clues from the first Nightmare, particurly “Steven”, but it’s mostly it’s own beast. It is surprisingly listener-friendly, very melodic and 70’s sounding with plenty of instrumentation and production value.

The prime influence here seems to be sounds of the past, and that’s fine with me. Alice knows what he’s doing and sneers his way through these snappy numbers. Everything builds and changes and builds again, each song is constructed masterfully. Alice and Ezrin have a clear plot in mind. Don’t forget these are the guys who did “Gutter Cat Vs. The Jets” back in 1972.

My favourite tune: The Tom Waits-ish “The Last Man on Earth”, a 1930’s sounding showtune-esque classic, along the lines of Alice’s previous song “Crazy Little Child” from Muscle of Love.

Second favourite: “The Underture”, which reprises the greatest musical anthems from both Nightmare albums in one grandios outro.

One really important thing I want to mention: This is the most fun Alice Cooper has been in while. Welcome 2 has humour and the musical chops to make the album a fun listen from start to back. Whether you like albums such as Brutal Planet or Along Came A Spider is not really the issue.  They’re just not albums to make you chuckle along while you snap your fingers. Welcome 2 My Nightmare, like the original Nightmare from 1975, is a lot more fun.

And now, for the collectors, a word about bonus tracks and the versions you’ll find them on.  Clickity-click for bigger pictures.

   

On the LP you will find the exclusive bonus track called “Flatline”.  I will say though, this Cooper platter really is one to own on vinyl. The sounds are rich and deep. The packaging is gorgeous, gatefold sleeve and nice big booket and all.

“Flatline” is a little staggering, though. Alice did not write it and does not perform on it.  It should best be considered a Bob Ezrin construction.  It consists of the sound of a hospital heart monitor beeping and flatlining for 3 minutes and 30 seconds, with electronic sounds and music in the background. Yet if you are into the concept of concept albums, this song might be a must-own.  It seems to conclusively answer the disposition of the album’s main character. His fate, left somewhat ambiguous in the final vocal song, “I Gotta Get Out Of Here”, is sealed.

(Oh!  And I love that titles such as “I Gotta Get Out Of Here” refer back to earlier Alice nightmare-esque characters such as Dwight Fry.)

The Canadian standard retail edition is full of excellent bonus tracks.  You get three live tunes, all recently performed:  “Poison”, “The Black Widow”, and “No More Mr. Nice Guy” are from the Download Festival.

“Under The Bed”, is also on the Canadian edition, and it is a studio original.  It is an excellent song that would have fit seamlessly right near the start of the story, lyrically and musically. Great song. Don’t know why it’s not in the main body of the album.

While collecting online, I found tracklistings that seemed to indicate that the US Best Buy edition had different bonus tracks.  It does not.  I mistakenly purchased it myself.  The only difference between it and the Canadian edition is a Best Buy sticker on the wrapper, advertizing the bonus tracks.  Therefore US readers, you can get these valuable extra songs at Best Buy.

iTunes, of course, has its own bonus tracks, forcing me to buy the album again.  One is the video for “I’ll Bite Your Face Off”, a good performance-style video.  Its only flaw is that it was filmed before the lovely Orianthi joined the band.

iTunes also has two exclusive studio songs.  “A Bad Situation” sees Alice singing in an exagerrated Elvis Presley type-voice, but the song is a pretty straightforward rock track.  According to Alice, a bad situation would be the nightmare of working 9-5 every day in the same day job.  That’s how this song would have fit into the concept of Nightmare.

“We Gotta Get Out Of This Place” is a cover of The Animals classic, recorded specifically to be a bonus tracks, also on the iTunes version.

ITunes has a 25 minute audio dialogue with Alice Cooper as a final bonus track.  This worthwhile listen has Alice discussing all the songs, their makings, and meanings.  Very cool bonus feature.

Lastly, we have the Classic Rock Fan Pack.  Click to embiggen.

             

The Fan Pack was a pain in the ass to buy and I do not at all recommend the experience to anyone.  It was something like a month late and they were impossible to communicate with.

But you get one of those cool 132 page full colour magazines, including interviews with everybody from Ezrin to Kip Winger to Kane Roberts.  You get posters.  You get a cutout Alice Cooper mask (yippee?).  You get a little metal School’s Out badge.  (No idea why not a Nightmare badge but oh well.)  And lastly, Alice Cooper face paint, that will no doubt be cracked and dried when you open it.

For the album:

5/5 stars

Part 5: The Dream Job

RECORD STORE TALES PART 5:  The Dream Job

Of all my highschool friends, there was only one who had a job that he enjoyed.  Peter worked at Steve’s TV, still pretty much the best video store in town.  All my other friends worked at the typical places.  One guy worked at the closest convenience store every weekend.  Two more worked in the McDonalds kitchen. A few more worked at rival fast food places.  All pretty typical for kids at age 16.

Peter on the other hand (who later became the best man at my wedding) had his wicked job.  Back then there wasn’t much to choose from, the biggest chain store was Jumbo Video.  Everything else was pretty crusty, except for Steve’s TV.  Steve’s started in the late 70’s.  Back then they had one room, one wall of videos (3/4 VHS and ¼ Betamax) and a small bin of video discs, the precursor of laserdisc.  They used to offer package deals:  Rent a VCR and five movies for a weekend for a special price.  Not too many people had VCRs back then.

The store grew and grew and relocated pretty close to home.  That’s where Peter worked during highschool, that and learning an electrical trade with his dad later on.   We used to call him “TV Pete” because TV seemed to be his big love back then, so working at Steve’s TV was totally appropriate.  Peter used to borrow movies from work, tape them, and bring them back the next day.  Peter always had copies of all the new releases, and a library hundred of titles big.

I first became interested in working in a record store in highschool.  There was a small record store in Kincardine, Ontario that sold a mix of CDs, LPs and cassettes.  I bought a couple titles there over the years, including Out of This World by Europe, and Judas Priest’s monstrous Painkiller.

I thought to myself, what a great summer job that would be.

Instead, during the fall of 1989 my dad told me to go into the local Zehrs store, and speak to a man named Don.  I went out and got myself a haircut.  It was the first time I had a hair cut in 5 years where I didn’t ask the barber to “leave the back long.”  I cut ‘er all off.  It was a bit of a blow, as my hair had become…well, not great, but it was long enough that it was my trademark.

Neck still itchy from the clippers, and wearing some ill-fitting dress pants, I walked into the Zehrs store.  The conversation was brief.  My dad must have told the guy that I was getting my hair cut, because he told me my hair was “fine”.  He outlined the requirements of the job, and asked me if I could start the next day.   I accepted.  I was employed!  I began plotting my next order from Columbia House.

During my tenure there I bought my first CD.  (Trash by Alice Cooper.)  Other albuims to follow were Fair Warning  by Van Halen, Damn Yankees, Slip of the Tongue (Whitesnake), the charity CD Stairway to Heaven / Highway to Hell, Black Sabbath’s We Sold Our Souls For Rock And Roll, Ozzy’s Live E.P., and the debut album by Badlands were all bought during the first few months with Zehrs money.

I didn’t like the hours, which interfered with the Thursday edition of the Pepsi Power Hour.  I still caught the Tuesday edition on most weeks, but this meant my metal intake was now cut in half!

It was a job.  That’s all it was.  It was something to keep my dad off my back and make money to spend on albums.  That was pretty much it.  Monthly, the Columbia House catalogue would arrive.  There was never a month when nothing was ordered.  I was trying to explore everything.

But that was nothing, next to the dream job.

1993. Fuck yeah.

In July 1994 my dad once again came to me.  “Go see the guy at the record store in the mall.  He wants to talk to you.”  I put on my cowboy boots (the closest thing I had to dress shoes) and walked over to the mall once again, the same fucking mall where the Zehrs was.  It was awesome.

The store had been open three years.  There had always been a place in the mall to buy music.  This new store was replacing a failed A&A Records, and many predicted the same thing would happen to the new store.  The young guy who started it came to my dad for help setting up an account.  My dad managed the Canada Trust at the mall, and because of that connection, I was the first person thought of when he needed a new part-timer.

The owner worked all day, all night, every day, and rarely even paid himself for three years to keep that place afloat.  He employed his brother and during the busy times hired part-timers.  Then he hit upon the idea of selling his own used CDs at the store.  He brought in a tray, marked it to about half price, and all the discs sold.  He worked up a pricing scheme and was soon buying and selling.  That’s when I came into the picture.

I’d already known about the used discs.  I bought Kiss My Ass for $11.99 there, the previous week.  It had just come out so I was fine with saving $10 on something I only really wanted a couple songs from.  Other than the used stuff though, everything there was overpriced.  It was one of those stores, the ones at the shitty malls with no selection and high prices.  That was all about to change and I got to be in on the ground floor.

I worked there in training for the whole summer, and by fall I was closing all by myself.  Those were the best nights.  Those were the nights when I got to pick the music myself.  We didn’t have many store play discs, and some albums were out of bounds anyway, but I gave a few a shot.  Jar of Flies by Alice In Chains was in the player pretty much every night.  I also found that I really liked David Lee Roth’s “multi-faceted” latest, Your Filthy Little Mouth.  The only problem:  We had a stack of 10 of ’em, and nobody wanted any of them.

The store owner was a shrewd businessman but musically clueless.  While he was playing Anita Baker and Don Henley, kids were coming in asking for Pigface, Soundgarden, Pearl Jam, Nine Inch Nails, and Ministry.  He ordered a pile of David Lee Roth discs, in 1994.  What the hell was he thinking?  He did the same thing again with Motley Crue’s latest.  There must have been 20 of them sitting there.

Very quickly in my tenure there, I picked up many treasures.  Rush Chronicles, a King’s X / Faith No More split live bootleg, numerous rare singles, and deleted back catalogue titles like Twisted Sister’s You Can’t Stop Rock and Roll.  We had the catalogues in front of us, so any time something decent was deleted, I made sure I snapped it up.  I already had a lot of this stuff on cassette, but cassettes don’t last and I wanted to replace them all.

During my time at the record store, I pretty much accomplished that.  If you come back, I’ll share some of the cool treasures that you may never see yourselves.