CD stores

Part 317: Rival

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RECORD STORE TALES Part 317:  Rival

There were very few people that I had standing orders to kick out if they ever came into the store. Sure, there were some. The Barefoot DJ was to be kicked out if he ever came in without shoes on his feet. The Creepy Twins, a couple of racist identical twin brothers, were to be kicked out if seen. The one that I remember most clearly was the owner of a rival CD chain. He was notable for his coiffed blonde mane. He looked like he was a member of Def Leppard, and still does to this day.  The fear was he would steal ideas for his own store.

That CD chain owner, who I shall dub Mutt Lange, had a longstanding rivalry with my boss, the owner of our stores. Mutt seemed like a total douche.  Just a pompous ass.  When we first started out, we based our pricing scheme on Mutt’s own catalog. He published an annual catalog, which we bought several copies of each year. When we first started creating our own price database, we used Mutt’s as the starting point. That really would have chapped Mutt’s ass if he had known.  I was even sent into Mutt’s locations to buy the newest catalog.  They needed to send someone that wasn’t recognizable.

I recall not really being into Mutt’s stores. I don’t remember ever buying anything there besides the catalogs. T-Rev found some old Saga CDs there, but it wasn’t really my kind of place. A lot of cheap mainstream “Super Saver” CDs, but not a lot of the stuff I was looking for. The catalog was useful, because it not only indicated retail prices, but would tell us if an album was still in print (or not).

My boss also checked out Mutt’s website regularly. I learned a valuable lesson there.

“Look at this,” my boss said while loading up Mutt’s site. “This hasn’t changed in three years. His site is exactly the same. He hasn’t added anything, he hasn’t changed format, or changed the look at all. It looks like a place that isn’t even in business anymore.”  That was a good point, so when we started up our own site, he made sure we gave it a good solid revamp semi-regularly. They’d change the graphics, the layout, and the way the search engines worked. That was probably the best lesson that I learned about e-commerce. Keep changing things up. People have short attention spans, but if it looks like your store is defunct, they’ll probably assume it is.

Back to Mutt himself – I recall seeing that blonde mane walk through my doors one summer day. It was actually T-Rev’s doors; I was filling in for him while he was helping to build a new store. And yeah, I had to kick him out!  Not a fun experience I wanted to repeat!

Part 307: Court

COURT

RECORD STORE TALES Part 307: Court

I can only say so much about this subject, for hopefully obvious reasons. I can say this: Yes, I have had to testify in court, in a case of stolen CDs.

It was the Monday after Mother’s Day, in the year 2000. It was a long, ongoing case, a break and enter. I had forgotten all about it. I had made my written statement a year prior. The store had done nothing wrong. We did everything exactly as we had to, when dealing with a situation like this. As per the instructions of the police, we took all the correct ID from the suspect when buying the CDs, and followed all the correct procedures. When dealing with stolen goods, the police actually preferred us to buy the goods rather than send the person away. That way, they get evidence.

Unfortunately since I was the buyer this time, I was a witness and was therefore subpoenaed to testify. Two of my co-workers from other stores also had to appear in court. I was the only one who decided to wear a suit and tie for my appearance. The other two came in jeans and T-shirts.

“Mike!” laughed Cam. “What are you wearing a suit for? You look like you’re the one on trial!” I looked around. Indeed, the only people who seemed to be dressed as nicely as me were the people who were on trial and their lawyers! And I didn’t look like a lawyer.

“I thought you had to wear a suit to court,” I said in ignorance.

Without going into details, here’s what I remember:

– Cam got a parking ticket because there wasn’t any parking available.
– We spent hours waiting in a room that looked like school class room. Hungry and unable to leave, we decided to order a pizza. We pooled our cash together but didn’t have much left for a tip. I remember that the delivery guy threw the extra coins back at us.
– A year after the incident, I couldn’t remember what the guy looked like. I remember him being big, and bald. That was not enough to satisfy the court that I could recognize the accused. My testimony was all but useless.

I remember reading in the paper a short while later that the defense lawyer got his client off. It wasn’t really a surprise to me.

I only had to go to court twice, both for this one case. The experience left me with a bad taste in my mouth. The store had paid cash for the CDs we bought from this guy, but we never got compensated for them when the police took them as evidence. In my experience, we only ever got compensated once, and that was just for four CDs. Although we always cooperated with the system, and made sure we always followed procedure, we got burned too.

Part 185: Staffing 2.0

A sequel of sorts to Part 92:  Staffing.

RECORD STORE TALES Part 185:  Staffing 2.0

It’s amazing sometimes how clueless people are, when it comes to looking for a job!  I’ve seen everything.  I’ve had people hand me resumes that were folded up into teeny tiny squares.  I’ve had kids apply that were so quiet, their moms had to do all the talking for them.  Friends, too.  Who am I hiring?  You, or your friend?

When we hired new people, we’d put ads on our website and do a cattle-call for applicants.  We did that in May 2004.  Here’s a memorable candidate:

Date: 2004/05/14
07:05

Tonight I have to work a little later than usual, til 6, to deal with all the incoming resumes. Here’s a hint to people who apply to jobs: If you drop off a resume, and then decide to shop in the store as a customer, don’t be an asshole with the staff. Don’t complain about store policies, don’t come in with a group of loud roudy friends, and don’t be a smartass. How can people be so stupid? Do you want a job, or not?

Needless to say, that guy did not get the job.  Instead we hired a guy named Kam.  Kam started about two weeks later:

Date: 2004/06/02
09:44

Today I start training new boy K. Should go well. [Name deleted] said she had good vibes about this kid. I sure hope she’s right because I don’t want to be overworked right now. K looks like Chad Kroeger, if Chad Kroeger cut off his hair, but that’s not K’s fault.

The good vibes about K were in fact correct.  He worked out great!  So great in fact that a few years later he served me by being a groomsman at my wedding!  Thanks, man.

NEXT TIME ON RECORD STORE TALES…

Who put these fingerprints on my Van Halen tin?