RECORD STORE TALES #1084: Ghost’s No Cell-Phone Zone

Those of us over a certain age, don’t we all long for the old days?  Wouldn’t it be nice to see an arena full of cigarette lighters instead of cell phones for a change?  Ozzy used to scream to the audience:  “Let me see your cigarette lighters!”  Does anyone ever command an audience to raise their cell phones?

I kid, of course.  The real issue is that some bands today, such as Ghost, don’t want to see a show being filmed and uploaded to YouTube.  I get it.  Bootlegging is far more ubiquitous than it was when I was in my 20s.  Back then, if you had the balls, you could try to a record a show yourself, like my sister’s friend did with the Barenaked Ladies in the 90s with a mono microcassette recorder.  They were able to get a few unreleased BNL cult classics on tape that way.  It sounded like shit, but they had it.  It was easy to sneak in the tape recorder, but you had to flip the tape and make sure you had fresh batteries in there.  Not to mention, you had to actually own a small tape recorder, which not everyone did!  Today virtually everyone has a cell phone, and virtually every cell phone has a hi-def camera built in.  You can even record in stereo on some.

Presumably for this reason, Ghost have initiated a No Cell-Phone Zone at their concerts.

The comments on this news were predictable.  “I have no problem with this,” said one troll, “since I have no desire to see Ghost.”

What about someone like me?  I am a full-time caregiver.  My wife has uncontrolled epilepsy and would not be at a concert of any kind with me.  I get a call, I leave.  That’s it.  I need my phone.

Here’s how it works.

Upon entry, your phone will be placed in a Yondr pouch, and locked.  You take the pouch and phone with you, pocket it, and enjoy the show.  After the show, you can unlock the pouch at an unlocking station.  How many of these are available, and where they are exactly, is not clear from the Ghost press release.  As long as these are plentiful and easy to access, this situation is not too bad.

If I got an emergency call mid-show, I could feel the vibrations, but I would not be able to answer.  However I would be able to step out, unlock my phone, and call back.

If the call turned out to be another air-duct cleaning company, or another scam, I would be pissed off that I exited the show to check my phone.  I wouldn’t have a choice.  If it rings, it could be an emergency.  That’s just my life.  That’s just how my life works and has worked for 15 years.

Although this scheme is something that seems new and therefore scary and threatening, it does seem to be workable.  You can feel your phone vibrate through the pouch, and still know your phone is getting a call.  What happens after that is up to you.  In my case, I would need to know what it was, and chances are, I’ll miss a song because of some stupid scam call.  In most cases, people will not check their phones at all, and just keep enjoying the show.

No cell phones waving in the air in front of you.  It doesn’t seem so bad.

The main factors are two:  the unlocking stations must be numerous, and easy to access.  Otherwise I’d have problems with this plan.

I’m cautiously on Ghost’s side with this one.  It will be interesting to see which bands adopt this, and who are opposed.

Could be interesting!