Part 140: For I Have Dined On Honeydew

RECORD STORE TALES Part 140:  For I Have Dined On Honeydew

Back in 19xx, I decided to do a road trip to get some proverbial “good lobster”.  I took T-Rev with me, not because he likes seafood (“nothing that swims” was his slogan) but because you need a road trip companion for a 2 hour drive to get lunch!

We both had Sundays off.  We ditched the record store, and hit the road one Sunday morning for Kincardine, Ontario, home of Pelican’s Roost.  It was the best lobster place in the province.  It’s not there anymore, but it sure was awesome.  T-Rev brought some road tapes.  He was always the master of making road tapes.  I remember he did one that was basically the best of Use Your Illusion I and II.  Another one collected the best tunes by Four Horsemen.

Problem:  The Roost was closed!  It didn’t open again until 5.  I sheepishly apologized to Trevor and asked if it was cool if we stayed until they opened.  He agreed, in the meantime we had lunch at Hawg’s Breath.

Then, we killed time looking for discs.

Kincardine didn’t have a record store then (it did in the late 80’s/early 90’s), but it did have a discount shop with a few thousand used discs to go through.  The great thing about out of the way places like this was finding weird stuff that was valuable, that nobody realized was valuable.

What T-Rev bought that day was not valuable.  It was, however, just too weird not to buy.  So he did.  What the hell were with those track titles?  “Muffle That Fart” was sure to be a top smash hit.

That certainly worked up an appetite for some lobster!

The Pelican’s Roost opened, and I put that unsightly album cover behind me!  I ordered the lobster tail with butter while T-Rev had the chicken.  We returned home with full bellies, and a disc that was just too weird to leave behind!


  1. I love road trip stories. Even better, I love going on road trips!

    I also love out-of-the-way places where they have piles of discs and nobody knows what they have. The chances of hitting gold are too tantalising to resist.

    But that album cover, man. THAT takes the cake! That is a thing of beauty. I mean, imagine going to all the work of making a record, and then choosing to do THAT for your cover art. It’s total artistic expression! It’s GORGEOUS! It may be among the greatest album covers ever. Ahahahahaha I love it!

    Also, you didn’t tell us if YOU got anything that day. Did you find any actual treasures in the unknown heaps in the backwaters of Kincardine?


  2. i hope she meant it as a “comedy album” (i can’t remember…i did listen to it though!) I wonder how many other “shots” they took that didn’t make it as the cover!



        1. Sure why not? They wrote a song about frickin’ TRANSFORMERS for cryin’ out loud.

          That’s my story and I’m sticking to it — “Hellrider”. Megatron is name-dropped right there in the lyrics. Megatron. See for yourself!


        2. I wouldn’t put it past them although Halford’s always making up words like that. It was only a matter of time before he came up with Megatron! I’ll check the lyrics but I might have to take your word for it.


        3. Yes! He’s the white jet.

          In the latest issue, Transformers #85, Starscream helped Optimus Prime finally kill Megatron. Yup, Megatron’s dead. Sorry about your luck Halford. Better change the lyrics.


        4. Yes and no…Megatron has “died” twice before. I’m talking strictly just the Marvel comics continuity from 1984-present. But writer Simon Furman has stated when the series reaches 100, that’s it, over, finito. So I assume when he killed off Megatron in 85, that’s it. I’m sure it will be. Besides, there are worse baddies out there then Megatron. In fact, the very page after Megatron dies…Galvatron emerges from the ice. And Galvatron is way, WAY worse.


        5. Maybe Rob and Glen need to team up and do a Transformers rock opera.

          Incidentally I was working on an Optimus Prime trilogy with my sister, she just never had the interest in it that I did though. Shame. It could have been a huge hit.


        6. You know, if it’s done properly, haggis is lovely. First time I had it, at a ceildh here in Ontario, it was disgusting. Next time though, in Scotland, it was lovely. I think it takes somebody who knows what the hell they are doing when they’re making it to help you like it.

          Speaking of fun stuff to eat, we were out at a friends’ place for dinner last night, and he made a jambalaya that included kangaroo meat. Never had that before. It was GOOD!

          Priest has a Transformers song? And is it on the movie soundtrack?


        7. Truffles are good. The kangaroo was really good too. Of course, the sauce for the jambalaya was heavy on the cayenne, so probably just about anything would have tasted awesome! ;)


    1. What? Awful album cover? No way, man! That thing is a work of art. GORGEOUS! Face it, she got there years before Rihanna did.

      Yep, I liked Kangaroo. Ostrich is awesome in burger form. Mmmmm. Alligator and snake, both were like chicken. I also ate choclate covered fire ants and grasshoppers. Venison heart, YES! Really, any part of bambi is good for me. And elk. Gotta get you some elk. So much meat on one animal, could feed a family for a winter. And it is so lean. Amazing. And moose! Game-y, but beautiful. And bison! No fat at all. Perfect as a roast with onions and garlic and potatoes and carrots and… oh man I am so hungry just talking about it. Dude, I’m hungry. Let’s eat something that used to be alive!!


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