RECORD STORE TALES Part 266: This sort of thing ain’t my bag, baby!
The weirdest gift I ever received at the Record Store was an Austin Powers “Swedish-made” Penis Enlarger Pump. This was a “gag” gift from a group of co-workers. I recall not knowing how to react! Awkward! It’s true that all of us were obsessed with Austin Powers at the time. Talking like him, reciting lines, all that stuff. But a penis enlarging pump? Sorry, that sort of thing really ain’t my bag, baby! Meanwhile, I had gone to Chapters and bought books for everybody. Normal books. Not…books about penises or penis pumps or anything. The same co-workers packed it up with “gummy boobs”, some silver zebra boxer shorts (too tight, sadly), and plastic handcuffs.
I’m one of those socially awkward guys to start with, so you throw a penis enlarging pump in a box with handcuffs and gummy boobs, wrap it up in Christmas paper and what you get is a blushing LeBrain!
Although I sold the penis pump at a garage sale, I did display it in my bedroom, briefly. Here’s the photo to prove it!