Helix’s fifth album was an important one. They were following the “big hit” album (Walkin’ the Razor’s Edge) and there were expectations. The band collected another batch of original material and hit the studio with producer Tom Treumuth again.
1985’s Long Way to Heaven is the second album with the “classic” Helix lineup: Brian Vollmer, Brent “the Doctor” Doerner, Paul Hackman, Greg “Fritz” Hinz and Daryl Gray. All but drummer Fritz contributed songs, with Vollmer, Hackman and Doerner leading the pack.
The two singles were the opening tracks. “The Kids Are All Shakin’” is a catchy for American radio play. It has always been a damn fine song.
Down in New York City, All the way to L.A., Boys and girls are gonna shake it, Yeah, each and every day.
There’s also a reference to a fan letter from Poland that was a big deal to the band at the time. “Kids Are All Shakin’” is a great rock and roll celebration, but the single version with additional keyboards is better.
The other single was the hit acoustic/electric ballad “Deep Cuts the Knife” written by Hackman and Bob Halligan, Jr. To this day it remains one of, if not the very best ballad Helix have done. It has atmosphere and bite, and a killer vocal performance by Brian Vollmer.
There are good tracks after the first two, but nothing quite as memorable. “Ride the Rocket” (Vollmer/Halligan) is fun but silly. I’m sure you can guess what kind of rocket Brian is singing about when he says “Reach in the pocket”. Other decent songs include the title track, which has a great chorus melody, and the heavy-as-fuck “House on Fire”. There’s also another ballad called “Without You (Jasmine’s Song)” that is worthy of praise.
There is nothing wrong with any of the other tunes, and some have some pretty cool moments. “Don’t Touch the Merchandise” has a nifty a cappella section that proves what great vocalists the band are. It’s just that none of the other songs really have a lot of staying power in the brain.
Long Way to Heaven was one of those follow-ups that was good enough, but always remain in the shadow of the more successful predecessors.
“The Sound of A” is in the air…but it took 50 years to get there!
Alice Cooper’s Paranormal was one of the most delightful rock releases of 2017, which really came as no surprise. Alice has been consistently awesome for several albums in a row. Any time he works with producer Bob Ezrin, you can count on quality. The new five track Sound of A EP is quality.
The song “The Sound of A” was written in 1967 by Alice and bassist Dennis Dunaway. When Cooper reunited with members of the original band for some songs on Paranormal, Dunaway suggested revisiting “The Sound of A”. With Bob Ezrin’s help, “The Sound of A” has become another in a long line of understated Cooper classics. It has the sound of Welcome to My Nightmare with a hint of the present. Another apt (but coincidental) comparison would be “Journey of 1,000 Years” by Kiss.
“The Sound of A” is packaged with four unreleased live songs: “The Black Widow”, “Public Animal #9”, “Is It My Body” and “Cold Ethyl”. Of these, the real treat is “Public Animal #9”, an old School’s Out favourite that has never seen release on any Alice live album. This is from Columbus Ohio in May 2017. As is often the case, “The Black Widow” is shortened live, but “Public Animal” is damn fine. Can you believe it took this long to get a live version? It’s one of the best on School’s Out, albeit in the shadow of a big hit. Even “Cold Ethyl” is hard to find live. You can locate it on 2011’s No More Mr. Nice Guy via Concert Live, and the semi-official Extended Versions and Alone in His Nightmare.
Don’t miss The Sound of A. Consider it a live EP with some stuff you’ll be glad to have.
GETTING MORE TALE #656: The One They Call Dr. Feelgood
Hard rock peaked in the summer of 1989 with Dr. Feelgood. The charts were already filled with hard rock acts. Warrant were picking up steam. White Lion and Winger were getting airplay. Bon Jovi and Def Leppard were still raking it in with their last albums, New Jersey and Hysteria. Aerosmith were back. All we needed was the return of Motley Crue.
The Crue were not exactly laying low, but they did have problems to resolve. Nikki Sixx “died” of a heroin overdose on December 23 1987, but was revived with a shot of adrenaline right to the heart. Then he had to deal with a lawsuit from an imposter named Matthew Trippe, who claimed he took over the role of “Nikki Sixx” in 1983 and was owed royalties. Both these incidents inspired new songs. “Kickstart My Heart” was about by the overdose and subsequent recovery. “Say Yeah” took a shot at Matthew Trippe and that whole strange situation.
Fearing the band would end up dead if he did nothing, manager Doc McGhee sent the band into rehab (except for Mick Mars who quit drinking on his own accord). Then, a clean Motley Crue headed up to Little Mountain Sound in Vancouver to work with Bob Rock for the first time.
Bob Rock was on a roll. He finished up the soon-to-be-mega-successful Sonic Temple for The Cult and was recognized for the sound he was able to capture, particularly on the drums. He was also excellent at playing babysitter with musicians who were notoriously hard to work with. To minimize infighting, Rock split Motley up and had them all record separately. And because Aerosmith were in town recording Pump, Steven Tyler dropped by. He offered support for the newly clean band, and vocals on a new track called “Slice of Your Pie”.
The Crue’s first gig clean and sober was the Moscow Music Peace Festival in August of 1989. Although they had finished a new album, they played no new songs, saving them for proper release and promotion. Instead they played oldies from Girls, Girls, Girls, Theater of Pain, Shout at the Devil and Too Fast For Love. It was anything but peaceful. The gig, organized by McGhee, had been pitched to the bands involved as an equal opportunity. Bon Jovi, who McGhee also managed, were arguably the best known in Russia, as they were the only one with an official release there. They were booked to play last, but McGhee stressed there was no “headliner”. There was already friction between bands, because Ozzy Osbourne felt he should have been the headliner. Black Sabbath were massively popular with Russian rock fans, although they had to scour bootleg markets to find any.
Vince Neil live at the Moscow Music Peace Festival 08/12/1989 – Robert D. Tonsing/AP
Things came to a head when Bon Jovi featured pyro in their set, which none of the other bands had. Motley Crue interpreted this as favouritism towards Bon Jovi. Tommy Lee responded by ripping the shirt off Doc McGhee’s back. Motley Crue fired him and headed home on their own.
This drama did nothing to defuse Motley Crue’s momentum. Their new album Dr. Feelgood was released on September 1 1989, eventually going #1 and spawning five hit singles.
Meanwhile back in Canada, I was following all the Motley news with great anticipation. A Hit Parader magazine interview implied that Dr. Feelgood was so ambitious, it might even turn into a concept album. In fact the band had so many new songs that a second album, called Motley Crue: The Ballads was considered for 1990 release. The concept at that point was to do a new Motley Crue studio album that was all-heavy, no ballads. The softer songs would be saved for the second LP. Ultimately they got cold feet and realised putting out an album with no ballads in 1989 was commercially stupid, and so Dr. Feelgood was released with a mixture of tracks – the best 10 songs and one intro.
“Dr. Feelgood” was the first single, and it dominated airwaves just as summer holidays were ending. It, and “Love in an Elevator” by Aerosmith were absolutely everywhere. “Feelgood” had the edge with me, due to its massive drum sound and serious vibe. Bob Rock captured what might have been the biggest drum sound since Zeppelin, or Creatures of the Night by Kiss. Either way, Motley and Aerosmith really put Little Mountain Sound on the map as the studio to beat.
I tried to catch “Feelgood” on the radio and record it, but failed. Instead I bought the cassette single at the local Zellers store. Considering how many tracks the band worked up for Feelgood, I hoped they would be releasing non-album B-sides. They did not. Instead, “Feelgood” was backed by “Sticky Sweet”, probably the weakest album track.
I wondered what happened to all those unreleased songs that Hit Parader mentioned. “Say Yeah” was not on the album or singles. Neither were “Get It For Free” or “Rodeo”. (We’d have to wait another 10 years for them to be issued on the “Crucial Crue” remastered series.) A CD could hold almost 80 minutes of music, but Dr. Feelgood was the standard 45 minutes long. Since CDs were so expensive at the time, some fans argued “You have room, so put all the tracks on there and give us the value for our money.” Of course, this attitude changed later on, when listeners realised that albums with lots of extra filler were not as much fun to listen to. And, sadly, the unreleased Motley songs were pretty much filler. The stuff that went on Dr. Feelgood was as good as they had.
Dr. Feelgood was one of the first CDs I ever got, on Christmas Day 1989, along with my first CD player. The sonics of the album were everything they were hyped to be, but what really impressed me were the silences of compact disc. I was used to tape hiss. As “Time For Change” slowly faded out to nothing, I cranked the volume to 10. It was amazing to hear the fadeout clearly, without the tape hiss that had become part and parcel of music listening.
The album earned some great reviews for its sound, songs and even some of the lyrics. “Time For Change” revealed a new more mature direction. “Kickstart My Heart” took a serious subject and made it inspiring without wimping out. “When I get high, I get high on speed, top fuel funnycar’s a drug for me.” Some called it Motley’s best album, and still hold it as such.
As the album rocketed up the charts, Motley embarked on an 11 month tour. Most of the new album received live attention, with five songs being part of the regular set. One person who was paying attention to this was Metallica drummer Lars Ulrich. Lars fell hard for the Motley drum sound, and sought out Bob Rock to produce their next album too. The rest is history. Like Motley before them, Bob Rock helped push Metallica into the upper echelons.
On Monday June 18 1990, Motley Crue headlined at the SkyDome in Toronto. The following day, June 19, the highschool halls were flooded with Motley Crue T-shirts. Where were all these “fans” last year when I seemed to be about one of two people in school who liked Motley Crue? It was always so bizarre to see concert shirts on people who never expressed interest in the band. All those girls who always seemed to say, “I hate Montley Crue”!
What goes up, must come down. Motley relapsed after partying too hard with the Skid Row guys. Infighting ramped up. As the band were set and poised to top Dr. Feelgood with something truly special, they fired Vince Neil. It was as if they were handed the keys to the kingdom, to promptly throw them off the mountain. Although their 1994 album with John Corabi is a monster (and possibly their all-time best), as a commercial entity, Dr. Feelgood was never surpassed. It eventually sold over six million copies.
We’ll have to see how Motley portray it in their movie The Dirt, but the truth is that Dr. Feelgood was a one-off mega-success story they’d never repeat.
One Night in Nashville is John’s live run-through of the entire Motley Crue album with his ace band, including his son Ian on drums. Many of these songs have never been played live, and never in sequence like this. Veteran producer Michael Wagener ensured a kickass sound.
Ian Corabi has no problem duplicating Tommy Lee’s hard hitting style on opener “Power to the Music”. John’s voice is still more than capable of shredding these songs two decades later. His rasp and power have barely ebbed. Compare this to Motley Crue’s final live album The End and…actually, no don’t compare. Corabi buries The End.
“Uncle Jack” is one of the most pounding tracks on this CD. It was a departure for Motley Crue, a deadly serious track, and John nails every scream. The guitarist also duplicates Mick Mars’ underrated solo, note for note. Yes, underrated. Mars is rarely given the credit he deserves for creating his own style, and thereby defining the sound of the Crue.
If you know the album then you know these songs; if you don’t then buckle the fuck up.
Through the single “Hooligan’s Holiday”, Corabi and Co. breath life into songs we only know from the album. “Everybody wants a piece of the pie” — at least in this Nashville crowd they do, soaking up every riff and blistering scream. Even the complicated “Misunderstood” burns it down. Guitars instead of keyboards, backing band instead of Glenn Hughes, and it’s full speed ahead. Once again the solo is note for note, but there’s a brand new outro where it once faded.
“Loveshine” is a bit of a respite, a nice little acoustic jam a-la Zeppelin III. These last two songs are so far above and beyond what Motley Crue were capable of when Vince Neil was in the band. Corabi opened up entire new soundscapes for them to explore, and “Loveshine” is cool on the psychedelic side. Back to the rock, “Poison Apples” is a tribute to glam rock and what Motley Crue are about. “Took a Greyhound bus down to Heartattack and Vine, with a fist full o’ dreams n’ dimes…” Of all the tracks on Motley Crue, “Poison Apples” was the closest to the original Motley sound, and John owns it.
This is where you’d flip sides on the original album, so it’s the perfect spot for telling a story: track 7, “John Joins the Band”. He got the call before it was even announced that Vince had left the band, and he couldn’t say a word to anybody. One of the first songs they wrote together was “Hammered”, an old riff that John brought to the band. Even darker is “Til Death Do Us Part” which was actually supposed to be the title of the album at one point. It’s one of many long bombers, but things lighten up a bit on “Welcome to the Numb”. Dig that slide guitar riff, another very Zep aspect to this batch of songs. By John’s intro, it sounds like a ball-baster of a song to play live. He says they didn’t think they were going to be able to do it! But they killed it, and John says that’s due to the hard work of guitarist Jeremy Asbrock.
Your head receives a good solid smack with “Smoke the Sky”, a waste-laying blitzkrieg of a smokeshow. Corabi touts the health benefits of rolling a joint. “Home grown version complements the senses, opens up my mind.” Perhaps Peter Tosh put it better, when he sang “Birds eat it,” and “It’s good for the flu, it’s good for the asthma.” Regardless of who said it best, “Smoke the Sky” is a flat-out mosh.
“Droppin’ Like Flies” continues the ass-kicking, but at a more sensible pace, trading speed for mass. And although in theory it shouldn’t work, after this fairly relentless assault, the album always closes on a ballad called “Driftaway”. After a sentimental version for the Nashville crowd, there’s a bonus track. This is another ballad, “10,000 Miles Away” from the Japanese Quaternary EP, live for the first time. Icing, meet cake.
This Corabi live album is far stronger than any of the three Motley Crue live albums. In terms of performance, John’s band just kills Motley Crue. Of course, they had a brilliant set to work with. Finally hearing these songs live, and in album context, is a long fulfilled wish. John Corabi has long been respected by the rock community and this CD is a testament to why.
Vanilla Fudge, Rod Stewart, Black Sabbath, Dio, Cactus, Blue Murder, King Kobra…those are just a handful of the bands who have boasted an Appice in their ranks. Drumming brothers Carmine and Vinny have been recognised by fans and critics alike for their rhythms and associations with amazing bands. Now they step out on their own, with a duo album called Sinister.
The musical directions are all alloys of good ol’ heavy metal. “Sabbath gave us metal!” goes one line (more on that later). You know what you’re getting. There’s even a Sabbath medley called “Sabbath Mash”. Joining the Appice brothers are familiar names such as: Craig Goldy (Dio), Tony Franklin (Blue Murder), Robin McAuley (MSG), Paul Shortino (Ruff Cutt), Joel Hoekstra (Whitesnake), Ron “Bumblefoot” Thal (Guns N’ Roses) and Jim Crean (who regularly plays live with the brothers).
Many tracks have both drummers, with Vinny panned to the left and Carmine to the right. It’s not immediately obvious, but if you listen, the drums sound huge! Double drummers are not something we’re used to hearing, so pay attention and listen to the individuals and what they’re doing. You won’t be bored, even if you’re not a drummer.
Everything rocks — no ballads. You’ll find a sludgy Sabbath vibe on some tracks such as “Killing Floor” (lead vocals by Chas West). Jim Crean kicks ass on “Danger” which comes from the brisk Dio end of the spectrum. Another Crean song, “In the Night” is the most immediately memorable. It takes a few listens to absorb Sinister. Headphones may help, but give it a chance because it’s not an immediate listen. Other tracks are familiar. Blue Murder’s “Riot”, with Robin McAuley singing, is a damn fine heavy explosive.
What about drum instrumentals? Well, of course! You would feel ripped off if the two brothers didn’t go head to head. “Drum Wars” is exactly what you’re looking for. What Vinny and Carmine have done is create drum parts that compliment each other and work in unison, creating a fuller sound. You’ll also get a kick out of “Brothers in Drums”, which tells the story of the Appice brothers. “Is that my brother, on TV? That’s what I wanna be!”
The album goes a little sentimental on “Monsters and Heroes”, heavy as hell, but the lyrics may bring a tear to your eye. “Sing a song, singer, you’re the man on the mountain…” Yes, it’s a tribute to Ronnie James Dio, with lyrics by Shortino, who worked with Dio back in 1985 on Hear N’ Aid. Sabbath gave us metal indeed, but “Monsters and Heroes” captures a little bit of why we miss Dio so much.
Not every song brilliant, and 13 is a large number of tracks, but Sinister grows as you listen. (Stay tuned to the end!) It’s a grower thanks in no small part to some great performances by an assortment of rock n’ roll veterans. Any fan of heavy metal will find something to enjoy with Appice. Serious Sabbath or Dio fans should consider adding it to their collections, as an extension of the discographies. Bonus: there’s a poster inside!
In fact he was diagnosed 10 years ago, but it has now gotten to the point where it will affect his guitar playing. Glenn Tipton will be unable to tour as usual behind their forthcoming new album, Firepower. His onstage guitar role will be filled by co-producer Andy Sneap.
Tipton’s statement reads in part:
“I want everyone to know that it’s vital that the Judas Priest tour go ahead and that I am not leaving the band – it’s simply that my role has changed. I don’t rule out the chance to go on stage as and when I feel able to blast out some Priest!”
We wish Glenn Tipton all the best in his fight against Parkinson’s. Priest’s new album Firepower will be out March 9 2018.
RITCHIE BLACKMORE’S RAINBOW – Black Masquerade(2013 Eagle Rock from a 1995 TV broadcast)
It’s a damn shame it took so long for this recording to get a release. Recorded in 1995, this CD release was a German TV broadcast, and is the only live Rainbow album to feature singer Doogie White. The only difference from the recent Stranger In Us All album lineup is the drum seat. John O’Reilly was jettisoned in favour of Chuck Burgi who was with Rainbow from 1983 to 1984.
There are some clear mixing problems on some tracks, notably the opener “Spotlight Kid”. The backing vocals sound as if they are from another song, or audio leakage from another broadcast. There’s little else wrong, aside from those things that happen in a real live setting.
In some respects this lineup of Rainbow was rather faceless, but Doogie White was an entertaining and versatile frontman. He’s comfortable in all eras of Rainbow, and he does them all, plus two eras of Deep Purple. That means Doogie White not only sings his own material (seven tracks from Stranger In Us All) but also must sing the songs of Ian Gillan (“Black Night “, “Smoke on the Water” and “Perfect Strangers”), David Coverdale (“Burn”), Ronnie James Dio (“Man on the Silver Mountain”, “Long Live Rock ‘N’ Roll”, “Temple of the King”), Graham Bonnet (“Since You’ve Been Gone”) and Joe Lynn Turner (“Spotlight Kid”). White even does a classic Ian Gillian singalong in “Black Night”, imitating Ian’s “Doo doo doo doo doop!”, before breaking into a traditional drinking song with improvised lyrics.
What about Ritchie? Brilliant as ever, and even though he is notorious for…not enjoying…being filmed, it doesn’t seem to inhibit his performance here. Extended solo sections sound like joy. Perhaps having his true love on stage with him, Candice Night on backing vocals, soothed the savage Man in Black. Regardless he sounds as flawlessly and quintessentially “Ritchie Blackmore” as ever. There’s only one.
Live albums from obscure, buried periods like this often yield solid hardened gems. “Hunting Humans” and “Ariel” are better live than they were on album. Things are looser and livelier. “Wolf to the Moon” has guitar and keyboard interplay that takes it further than it went on album.
The most intriguing track is the Dio-era classic “Temple of the King”. As Doogie tells it, when the band were recording in America, they’d often pop out for a drink. Sometimes they’d play music in bars and “Temple of the King” came from those times.
Given that there is so much bloody live Rainbow out there (with another brand new live album just announced!), Black Masquerade can understandably go fairly low on your want lists. If you see it though, don’t hesitate.
GETTING MORE TALE #620: The Retired Jedi Master (of Rock)
It is always sad when one of my old Jedi Masters of Rock loses their passion for it.
I think for Bob, that began when he entered college. While Bob taught me the ins and outs of Iron Maiden, Ozzy Osbourne, Dio, and Motley Crue, he was drifting away from heavy metal. There is nothing wrong with diversifying, but his passion for the heavier side of things was waning.
I remember in the summer of ’91 when Motley Crue released their awesome new groove-laden single, “Primal Scream”. I asked Bob if he liked it, and his response was that the new Motley was “too heavy”. My heart broke in two pieces that day. I was so excited about that track. Motley were doing exactly what I wanted them to do: turning it up and giving no fucks. Bob just wasn’t into that.
His tastes were changing. I think a big part of it was that the girls he liked at college weren’t into heavy metal. Bob was checking out more commercial sounds and ballads. One of his favourite groups was Frozen Ghost. I also remember he was very much into Bad Company’s Holy Water. Meanwhile I was digging into the roots of metal and the bands of the future as well: from Deep Purple to I Mother Earth. Our paths diverged. I couldn’t be less interested in new Bad Company, but I was intent on collecting the entire Black Sabbath back catalogue. It made me a little sad, but I’m not regretful about where my explorations took me over the years.
I think it can be summed up as below:
1.The girls we liked didn’t listen to metal. 2. Bob’s tastes diversified while he outgrew metal. 3. I doubled down on metal, going all in. The girls might not like metal, but maybe they’d appreciate my don’t-give-a-fuck attitude?
Bob’s method got him dates. My method did not! But my musical journey took me far and wide. From the deep neon coloured oceans of Frank Zappa, to the craggy peaks of Mount Marillion, and back to the Valley of Judas Priest. As real life took over – job, wife, kids – Bob was no longer the music head that I was. He has always been a hard worker, and a family guy. My passion only grew deeper. The longer, heavier and more complex the tunes, the more interested I was in the band. I loved musicianship. Ballads were starting to sound the same to me, and there were some cool new sounds coming out of the woodwork.
Life took Bob and I in different directions. He met a lovely lady named Trish and now has four kids. I have none. If I had four kids, would I still have time to invest in my passion, music? Bob’s kids keep him very busy, believe me!
Bob sold off his collection many years ago. He had some amazing Iron Maiden 12” singles and picture discs. I bought a few of his singles, but there was one tie-dyed bootleg picture disc EP that I would have loved to get my hands on. I couldn’t tell you anything about it today, except that it was Iron Maiden. He had to do what he had to do. It’s gone now and he has little recollection at all about it. That information is sadly lost to me now.
Not every Jedi Master of Rock stays in the trenches forever. Some do, and end up writing about it on the internet. Bob may have retired his rock and roll shoes, but his influence lives on right here in these pages. Thank you for your wisdom and friendship.
TWISTED SISTER – A Twisted Christmas (2006 Razor & Tie)
One thing I love about Christmas time is the ability to knock out all these Christmas album reviews. I can only listen to this stuff seasonally, and I wouldn’t subject you to it otherwise. In my quest to Review Everything I Own and Then Some, we must occasionally delve into Christmas music.
Rock bands doing Christmas tunes is…well, I mean it worked out OK for Elvis, and then later on Twisted Sister and the guys from Trans-Siberian Orchestra. Each of those artists had success with Christmas music for good reasons, but I think Twisted Sister’s was purely the novelty value of it. The humour. The nudge-nudge-jokey-ness of it. It wasn’t that they made a Christmas album laden with integrity. It’s a joke album as the intro implies.
The album commences with Dee & company singing a traditional acoustic version of “Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas”. They are then interrupted by someone saying “This isn’t Twisted Sister!” It then goes metal with a dash a punk. “Ho ho ho! Let’s go!”
The biggest joke is that, apparently, “We’re Not Gonna Take It” was always just “Oh Come All Ye Faithful” in disguise. This was the big Christmas hit that put Twisted back in the spotlight, and it’s certainly the most enjoyable track on the CD.
Songs follow vague heavy metal blueprints. “White Christmas” is imbued with an Iron Maiden gallop and a couple chords from “SMF”. One thing is clear, and that is Dee Snider’s voice still has it. The guy is a hell of a singer, period. He’s joined by Lita Ford on “I’ll be Home for Christmas”, in the style of Twisted’s original epic ballad “The Price”. Unfortunately this one stinks like Christmas cheese that should have been thrown out last year. A shouty “Silver Bells” is done with a splash of AC/DC, but ends up sounding more like Poison. Bassist/producer Mark “The Animal” Mendoza has a pretty kickass bass solo, though.
Judas Priest’s “You’ve Got Another Thing Comin'” is the foundation of “I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus”, and it is at this point that you realise a whole album of this stuff is a bit too much. “Let It Snow” is given the doomy treatment, as an amalgam with Black Sabbath’s “Children of the Grave”. I suppose the doomy direction does go better with lines like “The weather outside is frightful”. Maybe Dee & company are on to something here, but I’m not too sure about the Sabbathy version of “Deck the Halls” with echoes of “War Pigs” and “Never Say Die”.
“Chestnuts Roasting on an Open Fire” is a little dull, and “The Twelve Days of Christmas” is too long, as it often is. The only version of “Twelve Days of Christmas” anyone needs for a novelty is Bob & Doug McKenzie’s classic. That’ll make your party pop a lot better than Twisted’s version.
Let’s check some boxes. Is this album:
Fun? ✓ (sometimes)
Heavy? ✓
Twisted? ✓
Creative? ✓
All well and good. But will you:
Listen to it more than once a year? ✘
Enjoy as much as something else you could have played instead? ✘
Be able to use more than one or two songs for your Christmas party? ✘
Ever really look forward to hearing it again? ✘
It is good that A Twisted Christmas brought the band the kind of success they deserved, but it is truly a shame that it is the final Twisted studio album. They were always considered a joke to the critics, they shouldn’t have gone out on vinyl as a joke.
There are way too many CDs in my collection that I don’t like, but I own for one or two rarities. ECW Extreme Music is one of those many. I have never watched an ECW wrestling match in my life. I only know one of the wrestlers pictured inside, Bam Bam Bigelow, because he was in the WWF when I was a kid. I don’t like the 90s version of wrestling with the blood and barbed wire. And I don’t like much of the music they used.
First is the generic riff/loop combo of Harry Slash and the Slashtones, whoever that is. Skip that repetitive crap to get to a White Zombie remix. “El Phantasmo and the Chicken-Run Blast-O-Rama” was a great groove from Astro-Creep: 2000. The “Wine, Women & Song” mix by Charlie Clouser is from their remix CD Supersexy Swingin’ Sounds. It’s an enjoyable remix, which is something best appreciated on its own rather than on a remix album.
Somebody named Kilgore did a carbon copy cover of “Walk” by Pantera, presumably because using the original would have cost more? It’s embarrassingly copycat. Your friends who don’t know will assume it’s Pantera. Fortunately a great Megadeth tune is next. Cryptic Writings is an underrated album, and “Trust” was probably the second best track on it (right after “A Secret Place”). This instrumental mix is an exclusive and has emphasis on Marty Friedman’s lead guitar which replaces the vocals.
Bruce Dickinson (and Roy Z) is next with a lacklustre cover of “The Zoo” by the Scorpions. There’s nothing particularly wrong with it, it’s just a cover, but it’s also a non-album track that collectors will want. Too bad it’s not exceptional like most of Bruce’s output. It’s just good not great. Another cover follows: Motorhead doing “Enter Sandman”! It’s as bizarre and weirdly perfect as you’d expect it to be. Grinspoon are next with their fairly stinky version of Prong’s “Snap Your Fingers, Snap Your Neck”, robbed of all its snarl. John Bush-era Anthrax are more impressive with Metallica’s “Phantom Lord” from Kill ‘Em All. It’s breakneck, and also very cool to hear a Big Four thrash band covering another Big Four group.
Pantera, minus Phil Anselmo, are here for their cover of ZZ Top’s “Heard it on the X”. It’s both ZZ Top and Pantera at the same time, and that’s kind of remarkable. That’s it for this album though — nothing worthwhile from here out. What’s the point of having a cover of “Kick Out the Jams” (courtesy of Monster Magnet) but then beep out the naughty words? Somebody named Muscadine decided to do “Big Balls” by AC/DC, a pretty obvious bad idea. Just awful. Then it’s more of Harry Slash to end the CD with some more pure filler.
CMC International released a lot of low budget crap over the years, and this CD is pretty poor. There are five pages of merch advertising inside, including one for a ECW Extreme Music 2. I skipped that one. This CD is collectable for the Bruce Dickinson, Anthrax and Motorhead tracks. But these are cover tunes we’re talking about, so tread wisely.
HELIX – Long Way to Heaven (1985 Capitol Records)
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