By the suggestion of Peter Kerr! Hot on the heels of our best KISS song lists, here are my WORST songs by my favourite band! One song for every studio album, plus one song to represent the many extra tunes that Kiss have in their discography! Enjoy – or don’t enjoy -the list of stinkiest Kiss songs of all time! (Peeeeww!)
NOTE: Some of these albums have no truly bad songs. Hotter Than Hell and Destroyer, for example. Therefore, I just had to stick my neck out with my “least best”. This is a much more difficult list than picking favourites.
EXTRA SONGS – Nothing Can Keep Me From You (Detroit Rock City soundtrack)
A really hard list. Worst song from Hot in the Shade? Get in line. Worst song from Lick It Up or Creatures? Much harder. Even The Elder was difficult. In most cases I went with my first instinct. I hope you enjoy this list – and sorry Joey about “I Love It Loud”!
In Early December, I hooked up once again with Joey Suto of Rock Show Critique. The topic this time was KISS, and it has been so long since I talked about that band. My channel rarely features my favourite band. It’s hard to find interested parties. I was happy to do this show with Joey. I think it’s one of the best things I’ve ever done. Funny thing – after Ace passed, another channel did a Kiss song list, but it was top Kiss songs from the Ace albums. I let them know that I was peeved that I wasn’t asked to participate. “Who’s the biggest Kiss fan you know?” So I pledged to do a better show. With Joey, we did exactly that!
Not everybody is into videos, so for those who still enjoy the written word, here is my list: One song for every studio album, plus one song to represent the many extra tunes that Kiss have in their discography! Enjoy the list!
FOOD FOR THOUGHT – Now That’s What I Call ‘Kin Music / What Are We Doing This For? (2003)
Thanks to Harrison the Mad Metal Man, the world knows about this incredible and unorthodox Iron Maiden tribute album. Hunt for it and hunt well, for you will want this in your collection far more than the Encomiums and Nativities In Black out there. Food For Thought (a spoof of Piece of Mind) get it far better than any corporate version could. Through its 19 tracks, Food For Thought visit every single Maiden album (to date), and even some non-album material. The tracks are performed in a variety of styles, often imitating the trademark styles of major artists like Deep Purple, Motorhead, AC/DC, and…Kate Bush. It’s not all metal, but it’s almost all brilliant. This is a unique and effective tribute album, infinitely listenable and thoroughly enjoyable. Let’s break it down from first track to last.
1. “Be Quick Or Be Dead”
Not as breakneck. More of a groove. Opens with a distorted transistor radio sounding guitar part; very alterna-90s. There is a second guiltar part in the beginning that sounds inspired by Bruce’s solo Skunkworks album. The wah-wah pedal in the riff is a nice addition. The female lead vocals are a change of pace, but the oodles of guitar solos are really tasty. The chorus is more layered with both male and female vocals. It’s heresy, but I like this version of the song better than Iron Maiden’s.
2. “Twilight Zone”
Let’s take Maiden to Funk Town! Unbelievably, this works really well as a horn-inflected funk song. Like a funkier version of Sledgehammer! I’ve AI Maiden funk stuff before, but believe us when we say that the human-made kind is way way better. Don’t listen to AI; listen to this! Once again, Food For Thought have created a version of an Iron Maiden song that rivals the original. The horns here are very Bosstones.
3. “22 Acacia Avenue”
We’ve gone to Funk Town, so now let’s hit the lounge. Yes, it’s a lounge version of this ode to the oldest profession in the world! It is largely acoustics and fretless bass, by special guest Chris Dale of Skunkworks! Though it opens with male vocals, during the “Charlotte” section the song transforms into a full blown Kate Bush homage. An absolutely genius interpretation and re-imagining. In many ways, these Food For Thought cover are almost like originals. This actual arrangement has little to do with Iron Maiden’s! The piano parts are really completely original.
4. “Angel and the Gambler”
Our first foray into the Blaze era, which this album does frequently. This folksy acoustic version is only 2:14 long. It is either a duet, or mixed with double tracked vocals. The original should probably have been about this length! The delicately picked guitars are like a country picnic. Such a strange re-imagining, but imminently catchy…with a lot less repetition. There’s even a country hoedown at the end.
5. “Mercenary”
One of the best tracks on the album. This lesser known track from Brave New World is performed as a Bee Gees homage via “Stayin’ Alive”. Has to be heard to be believed. The falsetto vocals aren’t bad, but the funk Disco beats are gonna get your butt shakin’. The lyrics are a complete contrast to the dancey vibes of the music! A short one though, as soon we’re off to war…
6. “The Trooper”
Electric violin, with growly metal lead vocals. Musically it’s reminiscent Canadian fiddler Ashley MacIsaac. The heavy growl vocals ground it in metal. There is a even a violin solo to go with what sounds like a fuzzy bass solo. Toward the middle, it goes into a section possibly inspired by Maiden’s “Mother Russia”.
7. “Fortunes of War”
Blaze era track number two with this dark classic, re-interpreted as an industrial/electronica track, with programmed drums and music, and distorted lead vocals. The digital beat is bizarrely catchy, and this track can easily become a favourite. The inspiration might be early Ministry.
8. “Blood on the World’s Hands”
That’s two Blaze tracks from The X Factor, in a row! They could not be any more different from each other. “Blood on the World’s Hands” is jazzy, with piano a’plenty and tasty jazz guitars. This one swings fast and bold. The scat vocals and drum break are a total delight!
9. “Stranger In A Strange Land”
Back to Somewhere In Time with a song that doesn’t get enough attention. Here’s some attention for ya! The mood of the lyrics is captured in this somber, acoustic version with violin as the feature instrument. The words are based on the lost Franklin Expedition, marooned somewhere in the Arctic ocean far from civilization. The fabulous guitar solo is pretty much note-for-note to Adrian Smith’s original. Maiden fans far and wide are likely to enjoy this one, one of the less quirky songs on the album, though still a departure.
10. “Flash of the Blade”
Powerslave time, with a Celtic jig and a violin. The violin handles the main riff, which is performed with hammer-ons when played on guitar. Here is the swipe of the bow. The layered violins also re-create Maiden’s guitar harmonies. The drum part is a perfect homage to Nicko’s signature original. This magnificent metal masterpiece translates well to a new genre that we’ll call violin metal! Unlike many of the other songs on the album, the lead vocal part is true to Bruce’s original.
11. “Wildest Dreams”
Is that Lemmy? The newest song on the album, from Dance of Death, is clearly done in the style of Motorhead. Everything about it screams “Lemmy”, from the distorted bass to the accelerated tempo. And this was already a fast song to begin with! Now it is breakneck. An album highlight.
12. “Futureal”
Best song on the album? What if Bon Scott replaced Blaze Bayley in Iron Maiden? This version of “Futureal” from Virtual XI poses that question. Both the lead and backing vocals could be mistaken for Bon Scott era AC/DC. The solo sounds like Angus. There is even an added lyric referencing “Dirty Deeds”! Honest, it is worth buying the album just for this version, which is so much fun that you’ll play it on repeat. The tempo and vibe are based on “It’s A Long Way To The Top (If You Wanna Rock ‘n’ Roll)”. You might even trick your friends into thinking it’s unreleased AC/DC track. Give it a try!
13. “Nomad”
Very System of a Down/Serj Tankien in the vocals. Very jokey. Feels like a polka. Not an album highlight, but brief.
14. “Sanctuary”
Also brief is this “Speed King” inspired version of the classic Maiden single. Right to the tempo, distorted organ and the solos, it’s very Deep Purple. “Speed King” is a great song to base a Maiden cover on; I’m sure they would approve. If Purple wrote “Sanctuary” in 1970, this is what it would sound like. The only difference is that this singer doesn’t scream, but he really shouldn’t since is a Paul Di’Anno song, not Bruce.
15. “Innocent Exile”
Another foray into electronica. The programmed beats and music are accompanied by female lead vocals. Not bad, because it’s a great Maiden song, but again not an album highlight.
16. “Public Enema Number One”
No Prayer for the Dying is represented here by this lovely acoustic ballad, with mournful vocals, accordion and a fretless bass solo. Though it is a total contrast to the original, perhaps it captures the mood of the lyrics better than Maiden did it.
17. “Heaven Can Wait”
A wake-up call here as we’re bombarded with upbeat 80s New Wave. Is the inspiration here the Talking Heads? Regardless it’s tremendous fun and much shorter than Maiden’s original.
18. “Burning Ambition”
A B-side and a surprising choice at that! This forgotten Maiden song works better as performed by Food For Thought, as an acoustic folksy version, with mandolin. It’s all very Rod Stewart circa “Maggie Mae”. If only it had Rod’s rasp. This track is a lot of fun, especially if you love Iron Maiden deep cuts.
19. “Seventh Son of a Seventh Son”
Food For Thought chose to close the album with what is normally a Side Two opener, “Seventh Son of a Seventh Son”. It works brilliantly in this position. Unlike some of the abbreviated tracks on this album, “Seventh Son” is the full length, well over 10 minutes. It begins very “No Quarter” (Led Zeppelin) to begin, with that John Paul Jones keyboard sound. It gets heavy after the middle section, which could top the Maiden original. The way they use the original music, but play it on different instruments, it fascinating to hear. A track like this is tricky to re-arrange, but here it is!
Find this album. Get it in your collection, and enjoy it over and over again.
Evil Elvis is back in 2026 with his new album Atomic Psycho, but you can get a taste of the new tunes on his new compilation: Evilest Elvis! KC Carlisle is a Toronto psychobilly artist who has a reputation for a hot live show, great musicianship, and horror-inspired lyrics. The tunes range from punky spunk to loungy rock.
The songs:
“Cat Woman” from 2017’s Undead Or Alive: The rambunctious chorus of “Here, kitty kitty” will keep you rocking while that bassline keeps things moving!
“Zombified” from 2001’s Evil Elvis: Now we’re on a slow nocturnal groove, perfect for those spooky nights. This smooth, smoky tune has an intoxicating quality.
“Evil Love” – new song from 2026’s Atomic Psycho: The master of the drum, Cleave Anderson from Blue Rodeo, makes his Evil Elvis debut here. It is incredible to think that this veteran drummer from one of my favourite bands is now burning down the house with Evil Elvis. On this one, EE channels the original Elvis a bit on the chorus, but in ways the King could never have foreseen. “I’ll kill your fuckin’ parents and make it look like suicide!” he growls. “Evil Love” indeed! Cleave absolutely proves his punk rock mettle here. A promising song.
“Too Fast For You” – a 2015 single that ended up on Undead Or Alive, is a personal favourite. There’s an Alice Cooper vibe here, of the Detroit variety.
“Surfin’ To Hell” – from 2011’s Tattoo’d Fuckwit. This adds surf rock sounds to the repertoire. The guitar solo is manic panic fun.
That concludes “Side Eh” of the album, and on to “Side B”:
“My Evil” from 2017’s Undead Or Alive: A jaunty number with organ and a shuffle beat. This impressive song has lush backing vocals, on a chorus that reminds me a little bit of Big Bad Voodoo Daddy. Possibly the best track on the album and a song which deserved to be a hit somewhere somehow! “GO!”
“I Wanna Wed (The Undead)” is a funny title, from 2001’s Evil Elvis. This has the most traditional rock and roll sounds, like something out of a 1950’s graveyard. Just pure fun, with a Halloween dance party vibe.
“Wolf Woman” – from 2006’s Viva Las Vampire: If you have a thing for a woman with body hair, you will probably love this ode to werewolf love!
“Heavenly Body (From Outer Space)” is the second of the new songs to come from 2026’s Atomic Psycho. The bassline plays a bit of the Twilight Zone theme before Cleave rings the band in with a thumping beat. We’re off to space this time! The backing vocals provide a the hooks on the chorus. Once again, the musicianship and singing are really top notch here. The guitar solo is way fun!
“Let’s Make Sin” from 2011’s Tattoo’d Fuckwit: “Come on baby, let the sinnin’ begin!” Vampire love is fun way to end the album. But wait!!
There’s more! Two “XXXtra Tracks” bring the total track count to 12.
“Backseat Love” – from 2017’s Undead Or Alive. A fun duet with one foot in the 1950s and the other in the grave!
“Hey Space Girl!” – from 2001’s Evil Elvis. The roughest, most garage-y song on the album. An ode to a woman from Mars that’s here to stay. “Hey space girl, wanna see my laser gun?”
This album was dedicated to photographer Ron Boudreau, a staple of the Toronto scene who took pictures of many of the bands I loved. Rest in peace Ron.
SPASTIC PHONO BAND – “Wings Under Japan” (1980 7″ single, Slipped Disc Records)
INVESTIGATIVE REPORT – 45 years ago…
[Editor’s note: the authors of this report have asked to retain their anonymity.]
The year: The harsh winter of 1980, remembered for its deep cold and snow. In the realm of popular music, all four Beatles were still alive, even though the band had been broken up for a decade. One of the Beatles soon found themselves in a wee bit of trouble. This trouble would spill all over the world news, causing rippling effects and ramifications far beyond the shores of England, for that winter in New York State, a band would go on to record a song….
The Beatle in trouble was the still-babyfaced Paul McCartney. It was no secret that he was already known for enjoying the green leaf. Back in 1972, McCartney was arrested in Sweden for possession of Lady Ganja. He was released without charges at that time, but his reputation was now cemented. McCartney wanted to book a Japanese tour in the mid-70s, but the country was very strict about illegal substances and refused Paul permission to play. The fans in Japan would have to do without.
Finally, in 1980, Japan had a change of heart and granted permission for Paul McCartney and Wings to tour in the Land of the Rising Sun.
He just needed to make sure he packed appropriately for the trip.
Paul McCartney is an undisputed musical genius. His songs will last 100 years. That does not mean that Paul always used his head. Despite the scrutiny he was bound to experience upon entering Japan, he decided to bring a stash with him. He was arrested upon discovery at the Narita Airport with 220 grams of Hawaiian green. Reportedly, he didn’t even attempt to hide the electric lettuce, just packing it in his carry-on bag with his clothing. Paul subsequently spent 10 days in the keiji shisetsu (刑務施設); actually the Tokyo Metropolitan Police Department. Teenage girls numbering about 50 serenaded the station during Prisoner 22’s incarceration.
Unfortunately for Paul, the nature of this arrest and jailing far away from home meant headlines all over the world. “PAUL IN CHAINS” and “EX-BEATLE ARRESTED IN JAPAN” went the articles, along with a photo of McCartney being escorted by Japanese officials. It was huge news, especially in the UK where it became a bit of a media circus.
The judge in the case determined that McCartney brought the drugs for personal use and not trafficking, and decided that Paul had spent enough time in jail. He was taken to the airport, and flown to Holland, where he was (perhaps surprisingly) refused entry. He still had time for a chat with the press.
“How did you get out?” asked the reporter.
“Walking on foot,” answered Paul in typical cheeky Beatle humour.
The experience was “a drag” for Paul. “I was woken up at six in the morning, then had to sit cross-legged for a roll-call. It was like Bridge on the River Kwai. They shouted out ’22’ in Japanese, and I had to shout back, ‘Hai!'”
The 11 date Japanese tour was cancelled at the cost of 2.5 million dollars and 90,000 tickets.
Did he learn from his experience?
“Now I have made up my mind never to touch the stuff again. From now on, all I’m going to smoke is straightforward [cigarettes]. No more pot.” He later acknowledged his own stupidity. “Well, to this day I have no idea what made me do it. I don’t know if it was just arrogance or what. Maybe I thought that they wouldn’t open my suitcase. I can’t put myself back into that mindset now…to this day I have no idea what made me do it.”
Over in America, shortly after shoveling out from a massive dumping of overnight snow, a young songwriter named “Vic Trola” was inspired to write a song. At least that’s how the credits read on the actual record. A recent online theory postulated that “Vic Trola” was indeed a pseudonym, but these writings are mostly found in conspiracy theory discussions. A fringe group that splintered off the main conspiracy theory group added that “Vic” was short for “Victoria”, not “Victor” as previously assumed. These theories are largely dismissed by the other groups. Our own extensive research has failed to unearth any other compositions written by Trola; just the one that you are reading about today. We do know, thanks to documents obtained in the process of researching this article, that after catching their breath from shoveling the drive on that cold winter day, Trola went inside and began writing. The surviving notes from Vic Trola’s respirologist confirm these facts.
Vic Trola’s song, as it evolved into its final form, was the product of on-stage gigging by the mysterious Spastic Phono Band, and that is where our story really begins. Though their names are now lost to time, and their relationship to Vic Trola is clouded, we do know that they consisted of a tight rhythm section. Both the drummer and bassist were exceptional. They boasted a dual guitar configuration, and multiple lead singers including one female vocalist who appears prominently on their sole recording called “Wings Under Japan”.
The Spastic Phono Band had experience. They had already been working on a set of originals and comedic covers. Favourite hits by Santana and the Might Zep were endowed with new witty words, and they found an audience who shared their sense of musical comicality. Encouraged by the audience reception to these songs, the Spastic Phono Band turned their attention to the hot news of the day: Paul’s arrest in Japan. Presumably with Vic Trola’s lyrical input, they started playing bits of his Beatles and Wings hits in a medley. Egged on by the crowd, and adding throwaway lyrics here and there, the song “sort of wrote itself”, according to a maraca player who claims to have been there at the time (and requested complete anonymity). It took only three or four shows for the song to come together as we know it today. The Paul medley became an instant live hit. The crowds ate it up. They learned the words, sang along and shouted for more! Clearly, the song needed to be recorded in a studio, and put out on a record.
Unfortunately for the band and Vic Trola, who were based out of Liverpool (New York, pop. 2400), there were few studios around within the reasonable driving distance of a beaten-up touring van. Their studio of choice would be unavailable for three weeks, and time was of the essence. The Paul story was hot now, not later! Even if they recorded the song immediately, it would have to be mastered and pressed at a record plant, meaning they had to act immediately. The scarcity of nearby studios presented a challenge. Would these young musical minds be able to publish their Paul pastiche in time?
As they used to say, the Spastic Phono Band let their fingers do the walking: They picked up the phone and eventually connected to something that somehow passed as a recording studio. The old schoolhouse that they booked was certainly was not conceived as a studio when it was built in the last decade of the 1800s. The top floor housed the recording space, but in a decidedly inconvenient design and safety choice, it was only accessible via an outdoor fire escape. All the band’s equipment had to be hauled up the emergency exit: drum after drum after drum, followed by amp after amp. Bags were passed from vehicle to musician and up the fire escape, which wobbled with every tentative step. Also, it was winter. Members of the band were not sure if they were going to survive the combination of snow and ice, metal steps, and gravity. To our great fortune, they did.
The studio owner was also the engineer, and his soul still lived in the 1950s. He didn’t grasp the nuance, or understand the Spastic Phono Band’s particular brand of humour. He did, however, have a friendly personality and got along with the band. A good sounding record began to take shape on tape. The band nicknamed the engineer “Eddie”, a reference to a classic Leave It To Beaver character, Eddie Haskell. Eddie’s studio had all the necessary equipment (minus an elevator). He even had an ARP synthesizer which can be heard on two segments of the recording: “Silly Drug Laws“ and “Banned in Japan”. Though the band did not have the budget to spend more time in the studio to do some further work on the guitars, the band climbed down the fire escape holding in their mittens a reel-to-reel tape of their hard-earned work. Physicists specializing in the behaviour of water at low temperatures speculate that the tape was almost dropped once on the way down, but saved from an icy fate in the snow.
The schoolhouse was demolished in 2025 at 131 years old.
Though recorded, the song still had to be mastered and cut to vinyl. With time slipping away, and Paul McCartney finally starting to experience a decline in the media frenzy over his Japanese vacation in the big house, the Spastic Phono Band were in an ever-increasing time crunch. Their song, heavily dependent on McCartney’s imprint in the public consciousness, had to make its way to a physical record that you could buy. Their preferred manufacturer was fully booked and the band could not wait any longer. The track was complete, mixed and ready to be mastered…but where?
Through furious searching and some tense bidding on eBay, we have obtained some of the logs, unfortunately anonymous, detailing the following sequence of events of the recording:
Monday.
Tempus is fugiting. Much to our dismay, the cute Beatle’s troubles in the Far East are rapidly becoming old news. Also with windchill, it is about four degrees today.
The Paul story was soon displaced by other current events. The Iranian Revolution made fresh headlines, and soon came the hostage crisis. Front pages were dominated by the tense 444 day crisis, during which 66 Americans were held hostage at the US Embassy in Tehran. As it happens, another band in the same area as the Spastic Phono Band, a trio, were working on a song referencing these events. One of the songs in their regular set, popular in some of the local Irish venues around the area, was Jerry Jeff Walker’s “London Homesick Blues”. It featured the unique chorus of “I wanna go home with the armadillo.” (Who wouldn’t?) This was easily adapted into “I’ve had enough of the Ayatollah”. The clever lyrical substitute worked, and the band approached the club owners documented only as “The Brothers Three”. The Brothers actually owned three clubs, which seemed poetic. The Brothers Three liked the song, feeling that it tapped into the sentiment of the day. The reached into their pockets and financed a studio recording of the Walker cover. They were now in the record business.
The Spastic Phono Band, who were familiar with the trio in question, learned of this. Realizing it was a good idea, they decided to make their own pitch to the Brothers Three.
Wednesday.
They went for it. Sure, they argued a bit and the oldest one may have smacked the youngest one, but we did get a unanimous decision. The Brothers Three are going to allow us to use the disc maker where they pressed the Ayatollah record.
The record would be made in a little postage-stamp sized record plant (if you could call it that) in Connecticut.
Tuesday.
One of the Brothers Three picked me up in his MG convertible today. We took the tape to a dumpy little record pressing company. Mission accomplished. We ordered 300 copies to be made. Then headed home, but my companion driving the convertible decided to put the top down. It may be February thaw, but it was so cold I still don’t have feeling back in my nose. Considering calling an otolaryngologist.
Frozen noses aside, when the boxes containing 300 copies of “Wings Under Japan” finally arrived, the McCartney story was equally cold.
Friday.
Believe it or not, there isn’t a lot of demand for a record by a band that nobody’s heard of.
The records were delivered to stores, who tried their best to push it, but were fighting an uphill battle. The record was not a hit. The 300 copies did eventually end up in the hands of the public. There are no documents detailing any sales, so we do not know if the band sold them at shows, or by mail order, or any of the other quaint methods available in 1980. Mr. McCartney never stumbled upon the record, as far as the evidence suggests. At least, we know he hasn’t sued. But could he even locate the Spastic Phono Band if he wanted to? We could not. Vic Trola has pulled a DB Cooper: Taken the money (if any) and flown.
Though only the original 300 copies were made, we were able to track one down for this article. It was clearly loved in its previous home.
Housed in a yellow-brown sleeve (the original?), the 45 has a nice maroon label, stating this is on Slipped Disc Records. Charmingly, the song “Wings Under Japan” is split over the two sides…sides 3 and 4. (It has been suggested that this release, with sides 3 and 4 instead of 1 and 2), gave George Lucas the idea to number The Empire Strikes Back as Episode V instead of Episode II as expected. With that film releasing in May 1980, we cannot completely dismiss the claim.)
The track is just over seven minutes combined.
Leavin’ on a Japanese roadtrip, Headin’ down a London runway, Paul said ‘I need to bring along some good weed, Because it helps me relax when I play.’
Guffaw! The song begins with a spoof of “The Ballad of John and Yoko”, now called “The Ballad of Paul and Linda”, with a similar structure, but words about Paul. “The way things are gooooin’, they’re gonna scrutinize me!” And they did…but not long enough for the Spastic Phono Band. The song continues.
Staring at the man with the baggie. Paul said, ‘Maybe I’m amazed! It only amounts to less than half an ounce, Why do you have to get so carried away?’
In perhaps the most obvious yet fun twist, the song then goes into Wings’ “Hi Hi Hi”…but re-written as “High High High”. This is funny because it’s so obvious, it had to be done. It’s amazing nobody else did it. Incidentally the harmony vocals in this section are rich and excellent.
Next up in the Paul medley is “Silly Love Songs”, redone as “Silly Drug Laws”. “What’s wrong with drugs, I’d like to know, ’cause here I go again! I’m in jail…” Another example of great singing by the Spastic Phono Band, but listen to that 1970s groove and the dexterous bassline! This is some serious playing.
Side “3” ends, and so we flip to side “4”. Fortunately in the modern era, we can use our digital capture software to seamlessly edit the two into one track! Next is “Band On the Run”, revised as “Banned In Japan”. In this case, the original song is almost a medley of different sections itself. The Spastic Phono Band do several of them here. “Stuck inside these stone walls, might be here forever!” There is a poignant moment coming here, frozen in time. Little did they know that John Lennon had only months to live, for in December of 1980, he would be murdered in New York. So to hear the line, “I’ll join with Ringo, and George and John and we’ll put the reunion on,” reminds us that finite period of time when such a thing was indeed possible.
A brief pause and then, just like on Abbey Road, wait for a Beatles-y coda.
“Wings Under Japan” is, quite frankly, one of the best parody medley songs (or however you want to describe it) you’ll ever find, for three reasons.
The mystery. Who are the Spastic Phono Band anyway? We may never know. (Or, more accurately…we may never tell.)
The musical prowess. There is some serious playing and singing on this brief single, and your life would be richer if you heard it.
Though depicting events before some of you were born, the lyrics are still hilarious due to the timeless nature of weed jokes.
This great, forgotten Union live album should be added to the collections of any fans of John Corabi or Bruce Kulick. Packed with great songs from Union, Motley Crue, Kiss, the Scream, and even Cheap Trick and the Beatles, this live album delivers on every level. 11 tracks live, plus two bonus studio songs. Power to the music indeed!
There are no specifics about recording dates, but regardless the album has been well sequenced, opening with Union’s own album opener, “Old Man Wise”. Very much a continuation of the Motley and Kiss albums of 1994 and 1997 respectively. Mix them up with riff and groove sauce, you’d get something like “Old Man Wise”. Bruce’s playing is always fascinating and “Crabby” was in top voice. Grit and power are the words of the day. This song pounds, and Bruce absolutely rules. We go straight into the equally grooving but more upbeat “Around Again”. Union had an excellent self-titled album out at the time, and it makes up the bulk of the album. Fortunately the band’s original songs set a high bar. Bruce Kulick doesn’t put out crap. A third song from the debut, “Heavy D…” might be called a ballad, but really it’s a quiet song with heavy parts. Or is it a heavy song with quiet parts? It is performed with gusto in either guise.
“We’re gonna do something from Carnival of Souls! This is called the ‘Jungle’, baby!” Then Jamie Hunting comes in with that rolling bassline, originally played on album by Bruce himself. Kulick’s past with Kiss makes an appearance on “Jungle”, a song Kiss never performed live, so quite a treat. John Corabi’s spin on a Paul Stanley vocal is full of raspy power yet still appropriate. Hearing this makes one wish that Kiss did have the balls to play it live.
That’s a lot of heavy rock in a row, and to lighten the mood, it’s the Union original “Love (I Don’t Need It Anymore)”, which is dedicated to a certain someone who was involved with a current event in the news at the time. It’s a little more upbeat, a little more “Motley” and absolutely one of the best Union songs from the debut. The chorus kills like a classic from Dr. Feelgood. Corabi then takes us back to his earliest catalogue, The Scream’s “Man In the Moon”. The Scream were a sort of musician’s super group, featuring Bruce Bouillet and John Alderete from Racer X. The Scream was more mainstream than that. This is a melodic rocker with a bluesy twist, and the band do a slamming job of it.
Bruce Kulick takes center stage on another Kiss song that was never played live, and his vocal debut: “I Walk Alone”, which he wrote with Gene Simmons. It begins with a short, Zeppelin-esque guitar exercise from Bruce. As for the vocals, you gotta give Bruce credit for not going back and fixing things. This is Kulick’s voice raw and exposed and imperfect and yet…perfect for the album. In many ways, this is better than the Kiss version, as Bruce adds a really sweet guitar outro.
A fun unexpected cover next: Cheap Trick’s “Surrender”! The backing vocal abilities of the entire band enable them to easily pull this off. You’d look at it on paper and scratch your head a bit, but it’s short work for these pros. It’s all about the vocals.
A dramatic “Pain Behind Your Eyes” brings to the stage another soft/hard hybrid with wicked drumming and vocals. However this is just a prelude to one of the heaviest Motley Crue songs ever: “Power to the Music”. Corabi takes center stage doing some screamin’ and preachin’ to the crowd. The demanding song is handled ably by Corabi, seemingly relishing playing this awesome song live on the stage again. They probably would have blown Motley off the stage doing the same song.
After some band intros, we get some Kulick solo wailing right into the final song “Tangerine”. Nothing like the Zeppelin song, this is a riff-rocking groover with excellent melodic delivery by John Corabi. Union were a melodic band, but John’s approach added the grit and grime that is like rock candy going down. This song slays with a resilient groovy riff.
Bonus studio tracks are two: an acoustic rendering of “October Morning Wind” from the debut, and a Beatles cover that blows away the more well know Oasis version. First up though, the rich acoustics of “October Morning Wind” really bring warmth to a cold subject. “My pain is measured by a sky that is old and grey,” sings John in a song that may well be about seasonal affective disorder. Then, the Beatles cover is handled with ease. “You’ve Got to Hide Your Love Away” benefits from similar acoustic warmth. It sounds live in the studio, and again the lead and backing vocals make it work seemingly without effort!
Union really made a strong impression with their first two releases, the debut and the live album. Was it too soon for a live album? When you look at the setlist, absolutely not. They had enough material with which to build a very strong set of songs, needing only one true cover (the Cheap Trick song). The bonus acoustic tracks are icing.
There are two things that Motley Crue are really good at: Pissing off their fans, and releasing compilations.
In 2019, the Crue released The Dirt soundtrack, featuring four new songs and 14 classics. In 2025, with the well running very dry, they released From the Beginning, featuring no new songs in its 19 tracks, and just one new version of an old classic.
From the Beginning is at least the 7th Crue compilation of hits, depending on what you count and what you don’t (I’m not counting box sets). This is a band that has only 10 studio albums. The well is so dry that this compilation includes several tracks from past compilations. So much could have been done better.
Let’s start with the fail of the packaging. It’s always interesting when a band chooses a photo of an old lineup rather than the current one. The inside fold out also features an old photo, meaning current guitarist John 5 is not pictured here, even though he’s on the album. There are no liner notes, no credits, just an inner sleeve with eight past Motley Crue logos. (Corabi’s is of course missing, as are several other mid-period Motley Crue logos.) It’s cheap grey and black printing, no colour. Absolutely nothing of value in the packaging for any fan, new or old.
Moving on to the one new version of an old song: the original 1985 recording of “Home Sweet Home” is remixed to include Dolly Parton, who has reinvented herself as a rocker recently, in duet form. There have been many successful duets when one artist is recorded many decades later over an old song. This is not one of them. It sounds fake, and it sounds silly to have 2025 Dolly singing with 1985 Vince. The guy’s not dead! There’s no reason for this, except that 2025 Vince Neil is no match for 2025 Dolly Parton. This congested sounding remix is truly awful, and not because of Dolly Parton. When singing without the old Vince backing tracks, she sounds magnificent and still powerful. Couldn’t they even get John 5 to record a new solo over top? No; they continue to use Mick Mars on their new releases while publicly attacking him. With all respect to the incredible Dolly Parton, this version of “Home Sweet Home” shouldn’t even count as part of the Motley Crue discography.
True to its word, From the Beginning is a chronological compilation, beginning with the common Elektra mixes of “Live Wire” and “Take Me to the Top”. This one-two punch always serves well, and the compilation is off to a good start. If anything, these songs sound more necessary today than ever, no matter who really played bass (which is very loud on this mastering)! The crunch of Mick Mars’ guitar belching distortion is a satisfying sound, especially at its most primitive. The classic suite of Shout at the Devil tracks are “Shout” itself, “Looks That Kill” and “Too Young to Fall In Love”. Even two past superior compilations, Decade of Decadence and Greatest Hits (1998), didn’t include all three. Decade featured just two songs per album, and excluded “Too Young”. Greatest Hits (2009) did include all three, and most of the other songs on this set. There’s something about these tracks that sound like they might be slightly remixed. Wikipedia credits them as 2021 remasters, but…there’s something off.
Fortunately for the new fan making their first Motley purchase, the original “Home Sweet Home” is included in the Theater of Pain tracks, along with “Smokin’ in the Boys Room”. For the old fan, we’ll wish they included something else like “Louder Than Hell”, but fat chance of that. To the point, there should be a rule that “Home Sweet Home” only appears once on any single disc album.
The usual two from Girls, Girls, Girls (“Wild Side” and the title track) are followed by the usual five (yes, five) from Dr. Feelgood (title track, “Kickstart”, “Without You”, “Don’t Go Away Mad” and “Same Old Situation”). These exact seven songs also appear on Greatest Hits (2009) though not in the same order, just in the same chunk. Then, just like Greatest Hits, “Primal Scream” from Motley’s first compilation Decade of Decadence makes it appearance. This song is like a wake up shot after snoozing through the same-old same-old.
At this point the compilation drops the album-by-album continuity, because as we all know, Vince Neil was fired from the band in 1992 after Decade of Decadence. Motley doesn’t like to acknowledge several of the post-80s albums in their compilations, including Motley ’94 with John Corabi, and New Tattoo with Randy Castillo. In this case, they also ignore 1997’s electronica-inflected reunion album Generation Swine and the new songs from the compilation albums of the era. (These include the aforementioned Greatest Hits which had two new songs, and Red White & Crue which had four, all of varying quality.) Instead we jump to 2008’s Saints of Las Angeles, a comeback album of sorts, and the last studio album the band would produce to date. The title track is an appropriate addition and still kicks today with a chorus that is worthy of past glories.
Downhill from here, as we go to the irritating and completely un-memorable “The Dirt (Est. 1981)” from The Dirt soundtrack, itself a greatest hits with four new songs. The presence of Machine Gun Kelly, who played Tommy Lee in the movie, makes this one a slog and an obvious attempt to lure in new younger fans. Staying chronological, “Dogs of War” from the recent Cancelled EP is a nice addition since it features the current lineup and John 5 on guitar, but is otherwise forgettable.
Finally, the album closes on the Dolly duet, which we should really refer to as a fake duet since it sounds so achronological, both on the album and as a song.
For a similar but superior listening experience, just buy Greatest Hits, Decade of Decadence, or just the plain old 20th Century Masters, which at least had some text inside.
GINGER BAKER’S AIR FORCE – “Man of Constant Sorrow” (1970 ATCO 7″ single)
When Blind Faith broke up in 1969, Ginger Baker formed the Air Force featuring musicians such as Steve Winwood, Alan White and Denny Laine. They released two albums, Air Force and Air Force 2, with the debut being a live album recorded at Albert Hall. They also released one single, a studio version of the traditional “Man of Constant Sorrow”. Its live counterpart was on the debut Air Force album, but the 3:31 studio version was only on the single. Today you can buy several compilations and additional live albums, but in 1970 this single would have been one to seek.
Most people today are familiar with the version of “Man of Constant Sorrow” that was released as a single from the soundtrack O Brother Where Art Thou. Based on the same traditional music, Ginger’s version is vastly different, though clearly the same song. Opening with soft electric guitar picking by Denny Laine, Ginger soon comes in with a pitty-patter that is distinctly him. Fiddles join in, and ample soulful backing vocals. Aside from Laine’s emotional lead vocals, the defining characteristic of this song is the bombastic (but not out of place) drum pounding of Ginger Baker. Horns join in at the halfway point, lending the song a celebratory Mardi Gras kind of feel. Though it starts quiet and unassuming, it ends as a magnificent folk-soul monolith.
The single B-side is an instrumental live cut of the original song “Doin’ It” from the debut Air Force. It was recorded 15 January 1970 at the Albert Hall with a ten-piece band including three saxophones and Hammond organs. This is a tribal but funky jam, with the bass by Ric Grech blazing the trail. Like “Man of Constant Sorrow” it builds louder and louder as it goes. This short 3:47 (fade out) jam is in and out before you know it, but works as an intense but fun workout from some of the greatest musicians ever to hit the stage. Certainly, the drums and two additional percussionists are a main focus and worth paying attention to.
7″ of satanic panic? Absolutely, for here is a Papa Emeritus IV “Ultimates” figure from Super 7. These limited edition deluxe action figures offer supreme poseability, lots of accessories, and supreme packaging. But is it worth the $70 that Amazon was asking for this evil doll?
Let’s take a close look at the figure, his accessories and packaging.
Photos and packaging can be seen in above video
The box is a cathedral-like window, which looks great as a backdrop for your figure. Papa can be displayed in his cloaks and mitre, or more simply in a shiny blue suit. He has options for interchangeable heads, and a selection of pop-off hands for either guise. The plain Papa has hands in plain black gloves while the more decorative Papa has hands with skeleton-like designs on them. He has two soft-goods pieces of clothing to dress him up: A vest-like undercloak, and a poseable wire-blacked cloak. Both are intricately decorated. Take care to keep both in excellent condition.
While it is easy to swap out Papa’s parts and clothing for any display option, this is the point at which the figure loses some character. Fully cloaked, his articulation is limited. You can’t lift his arms very high, which makes the “devil horn” hand kind of pointless. He has a hand that can hold his microphone, but it works best with the two-piece mic stand so Papa doesn’t have to lift it. Without the cloak, he can pose much better, simulating his dance moves from the video for “Rats”. His shiny shoes look perfect for this.
Unfortunately, Papa needs at least one head with an open mouth. Otherwise he never looks like he’s singing, which makes the microphone somewhat useless.
Super 7 got a lot right on this figure. The articulation is good enough on the base figure. The paint and details are spectacular, which is important for a premium figure. Not enough attention was paid when it comes to his accessories. Extra hands with varying finger positions are a standard feature now, but keeps like a cheat to include all of them in an accessory count. You can only use two at a time, after all. Instead of so many hands, an alternate “singing head” and perhaps Papa’s staff would be more useful. I’m also quite fond of miniature albums coming with action figures, but Super 7 didn’t ask for my opinion.
If you can get one of these with free shipping or on sale, go for it. Imperfect figures get imperfect scores.
Out of the gates, Thomas Polychuck’s new instrumental solo album impresses. With former Dream Theater keyboard player Derek Sherinian on almost every track, the direction is instrumental progressive rock. Derek has plenty of room to shine, frequently playing off with the guitar and providing loads of those vintage Dream Theater hooks.
The opener “Genèse” commences the album very much like the familiar bands we love so much, with big guitars. It then goes on its own fun tangents. This fascinating track has guitar melodies and a really cool interlude with flute sounds. Anyone who enjoys instrumental guitar rock will dig this track. Sherinian adds loads of texture on keys.
Simon Phillips gets things going on “The Cyclone” with a cool tribal sounding drum intro. Then Polychuck and Sherinian get jamming on a funky little groove, incorporating jazz, shredding, and rock riffing. You can hear things reminiscent of Richie Kotzen’s solo work in the notes. Derek and Thomas sound like they’re having a blast soloing with each other. It sounds very live, however they achieved it.
Polychuck goes full jazz on “Dieze11”, a lovely piece with soft guitar and piano. The soft drums are a nice change of pace, and the busy bassline has room to breathe. The main feature is the guitar, which lingers nowhere for very long, before darting off in another direction. The result is that it feels like the guitar is telling a little story.
Back to the shred, “1316” breaks off at a speedy pace, like a metal rocket fuelled by guitar. Derek continues to complement the music with keyboard textures that explore different sounds and voices. Though the guitars are cranked up, you can still hear jazz note choices in the solos. Then, suddenly it breaks into a Rush-like groove from the mid-80s.
“Construct” gets even heavier, but fortunately Polychuck has the wisdom to lay down a more melodic guitar line overtop the heavy chords. Between the guitar and keyboards, there are a lot of tasty bits here to grab on to. “They Carry On” is another jazz number with upright bass by Maciek. Picture a smoky jazz club at night. Not too loud, and totally authentic. Polychuck allows the bass to have its moment. It is followed by the awesome “Reality”, an anthemic guitar number with some very nice melodic elements.
The unexpected ballad “Sign From Beyond the Veil” is the most beautiful track on the album. With subtle organ by Chris Madden, Polychuck’s guitar sings softly of hopeful feelings. A very uplifting track, with a vibe like classic Joe Satriani. Soft though it may be, there are a lot of interesting guitar sounds going on.
The final track is a driver called “Retold Story” featuring Brian Tichy on drums. The drums kick on this one, and Polychuck goes once again for a storytelling guitar style. He goes from fast to slow, mood to mood, never staying too long in one place, but always offering interesting sounds and licks.
Having heard Polychuck’s earlier music, with influences across the board from pop to dance to metal, and now here with hardcore progressive rock and authentic jazz, one wonders where he can go next? Classical, country, blues? The sky is the limit for this talented musician. This album would be cherished by lovers of musicianship, and those moments when progressive rock meets jazz. An unexpected treat to finish 2024 with a flourish.
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