Reviews

REVIEW: The Max Rebo Band – “Jedi Rocks” (1997 CD single)

THE MAX REBO BAND – “Jedi Rocks” (1997 BMG CD single)

This is, in my humble fan opinion, one of the worst pieces of music ever included in a Star Wars movie, if not the very worst.

The 1997 Star Wars special editions are derided for many reason, but one that is not talked about nearly enough is the replacement of certain pieces of music.  In this case, “Lapti Nek” from the 1983 cut of Return of the Jedi was removed.  Why?  Because George Lucas loves to tinker.  He wasn’t happy that the singer in the band, Sy Snootles, didn’t have enough articulation and so thought to himself, “What could I do with a new song and a computer?”  The unfortunate results are called “Jedi Rocks”, by Jerry Hey.

The original song, “Lapti Nek”, plays in Jabba’s palace just before he feeds Oola the slave girl to his pet Rancor monster.  In universe, it is performed by the Max Rebo band, originally a trio featuring keyboardist Max, singer Sy and flautist Droopy McCool.  The band is expanded in the special edition to include more singers, including a really annoying big-mouthed Yuzzum named…uhg…Joh Yowza.  You can just tell that certain parts of the song were designed to show off what computers could make Yowza’s mouth do in the scene in question.

This is shit.  At least “Lapti Nek” sounded a little alien.  “Jedi Rocks” sounds like generic blues rock written by a highschool music teacher for his class to perform at the spring pageant.  And it sounds completely terrestrial, aside from the silly cartoonish vocals.  You can identify an Earthly harmonica, drum kit, organ, saxophones, guitars and bass.  That should never be the case when you’re talking about an alien band from a galaxy far, far away.  More than half the track is bland jamming that could have been on any soundtrack from virtually any Earth-bound movie with a bar and a band in it.

The only reason to buy this single, since you’ll never listen to it, is the clear picture disc.  The CD single released for The Empire Strikes Back was a shaped Vader-head disc, but they realized this were not good for the insides of your CD transport, which prefers a perfectly balanced disc.  Hence, they switched to clear picture discs that look shaped but are not.

Cool disc, bad song.

0.5/5 stars

 

REVIEW: Deep Purple – Bombay Calling – Live in ’95 (2022 CD/DVD reissue)

DEEP PURPLE – Bombay Calling – Live in ’95  (2022 – Edel CD/DVD reissue)

Years ago, I begged for a CD issue of Deep Purple’s live DVD Bombay Calling.  You could download the audio on iTunes and burn your own double live, which I did, but that just doesn’t do it for a physical product collector.   I’ve made my case for physical product here over the years many, many times.  Unfortunately, this physical release was pooched by Edel by excluding one song.  Like similar CD bootlegs of this 1995 concert, the new Edel CD is missing the opening track “Fireball”!  It’s still there on DVD, and it was always there on the iTunes edition, but it’s missing from CD 1.  That’s a real shame since it’s a good version of “Fireball” and it’s the damn opener!  (The original DVD of Bombay Calling was issued in 2000.  iTunes got it in 2003.)

When originally released on iTunes, this was promoted as an “official bootleg”.  Now it seems to be marketed as some kind of deluxe live album, limited and numbered to 10,000 CD/DVD sets.  The hype sticker calls it “the best rock show ever staged in India.”

This concert was recorded on April 18 1995, which eagle-eyed fans will realize is well before the Purpendicular album.  Bombay Calling was recorded not long after “the banjo player took a hike” and Purple ultimately carried on with Steve Morse for the next few decades.  Joe Satriani stepped in for a short while, but it was Dixie Dregs guitar maestro Morse that took the Man in Black’s place permanently.  This concert was recorded at the very start of Morse’s tenure, and features a few songs they would drop from the set a year or two later.  It also features a brand new tune they were working on called “Perpendicular Waltz”, later spelled “The Purpendicular Waltz” on the album.  The lineup was fresh, feeling each other out, but full of energy and the excitement of a band creatively reborn, both in the studio and on stage.

There is one earlier concert available from this period, which is Purple Sunshine in Ft. Lauderdale Florida, exactly two weeks prior.  That one is truly is an official bootleg, taken from audience sources and released on the 12 CD box set Collector’s Edition: The Bootleg Series 1984-2000.  The setlists are slightly different.  When they hit India for this concert, a new song called “Ken the Mechanic” (retitled “Ted the Mechanic”) was dropped, as was “Anyone’s Daughter”.  They were replaced by long time favourites “Maybe I’m a Leo” and “Space Truckin’” from Machine Head.

Special treats for the ears on Bombay Calling include Steve Morse’s incendiary soloing on “Anya” (which would be dropped from the set in 1996).  His feature solo leading into “Lazy” is also excellent, and of course very different from what Ritchie used to do.  Jon Lord’s keyboard solo is among the best I’ve heard, and even features a segue into “Soldier of Fortune” from Stormbringer.  The solo segments that Deep Purple did often allowed them to play snippets from songs from the David Coverdale period of the band, and this one was unexpected and brilliant.

Highlights:  “Fireball” (boo for excluding from the CD), “The Battle Rages On”, and “Anya”.

I love a good, raw live performance captured on tape, and Deep Purple don’t muck around.  This is special, coming from that transitional period when Steve Morse was just getting his feet wet.  Considering how different he is from Ritchie Blackmore, this smooth switcheroo is quite remarkable.

3/5 stars (subtracting half a star from iTunes edition, for losing a song)

 

Grabbing a Stack of Van Halen 4-LP LIVE: Right Here, Right Now vinyl RSD reissue

A spontaneous Grab A Stack of Rock on a chilly Wednesday afternoon!

Thanks to Dave Lizmi for watching me unbox this awesome new Van Halen – LIVE: Right here, right now vinyl RSD reissue. It’s gorgeous. Bonus track!!

REVIEW: Keel – The Right to Rock (Remaster/bonus track)

KEEL – The Right to Rock (1985, 2000 Metal Mayhem Music/bonus track)

From the Gene Simmons Song Factory, heeeeere’s Keel!

Let’s talk about the bonus track first.  Anybody could tell you that “Easier Said Than Done” was a Simmons song, just from one listen.  Surely enough, scan the liner notes, and it’s Gene and Mitch Weissman, whom fans know from 1984’s Animalize album.  Like many Gene Simmons productions, The Right to Rock bears his name on a few writing credits.  “Easier Said Than Done” is right down mid-80s Kiss alley.  What about the remix?  Structurally, it is unchanged.  The drums sound different, and on a whole the track sounds a little brighter.

That’s it for extras.  The booket is only a single fold-out, with no lyrics.  It has a note from Ron Keel, indicating that this is the first CD issue of the album outside Japan.

(The rest of this review was previously published in 2015)

 

The rest of the non-Simmons songs are basically reworkings of tracks from Keel’s first album Lay Down the Law. That album, like Ron Keel’s debut with Steeler (featuring one Yngwie J. Malmsteen) were on Shrapnel. For the A&M Records debut, they pulled out the big guns. They got Gene Simmons in all his wig-ness, and put out a very corny but tremendously fun music video.

It is “America 1989”, and rock and roll is outlawed. “Those who are apprehended suffer severe consequences.” Can our young teenage Keel lookalike get away from the rock police? Quiet Riot did something similar with their “The Wild and the Young” video a year later. It’s corny fun.

The song too is corny fun. I guess it’s a classic now. It has that stock heavy metal riff that you need: something Motley Crue or the Scorpions would be comfortable with. It has that rebellious rock theme that was so prominent in the 80’s. It has a shout-along chorus. “You got it! The Right to Rock!” Hey, I grew up in a Catholic school. I know what this is about. “Don’t let anyone tell you how to live your life!” I had a teacher call me out on the first day of school for wearing a Judas Priest T-shirt. I could relate to this song in a big way when I was 13.

It should be noted that Gene Simmons, as a producer, is not known for his sonics. The Right to Rock sounds pretty good for the period, but the drums ring shallow and weak. There’s not much presence for the bass guitar, and the backing vocals are the typical rock mush. That’s what you get with Gene behind the console.

“Back to the City” has a good Priest-like chug to it. I think Keel were going for something middle of the road with their music, like Priest-meets-Scorps-meets-Crue-meets-Kiss. If so, this hit the mark. Ron’s vocals are overwrought but that’s his style. If you don’t like that kind of vocal, you won’t like Keel.

Kinda stinky is “Let’s Spend the Night Together”. You know, I still gotta give the guys credit. They have made this into a pretty fine pop metal song. If you didn’t know the song, you’d assume it’s an original, in the pop metal genre. So from that perspective, I think it’s kinda cool. Stinky and cool — like good gorgonzola.

“Easier Said Than Done” was written by Simmons/Weissman, the same team responsible for much of the Animalize album. The lyrics even reference “Russian Roulette”, a song title Gene had been toying with for years. (A song called “Russian Roulette” was finally released on Sonic Boom.) So, guess who “Easier Said Than Done” sounds like? That’s right — it is a dead ringer for Simmons-style Kiss. And it’s actually a pretty good song. The problem is Ron’s Gene impression. I can’t help but chuckle at his dead-on Gene vocals. I dare you to refrain from a giggle yourself. Same deal with “So Many Girls, So Little Time”. Kiss fans will recognize that’s a line recycled from the Kiss song “Burn Bitch Burn”.

Onto side two, “Electric Love” is a Keel original, but you immediately notice that the song isn’t as immediate as the two previous Simmons tunes. “Speed Demon”, another original, sounds exactly as the title implies. Quality-wise, it’s only at “Priest outtake” level (Defenders of the Faith era). Then it’s back to Simmons outtakes, with “Get Down”, the weakest of the Simmons songs by a long shot. “You’re the Victim (I’m the Crime)” is a Gene-like title, but this too is a Keel tune. It’s in the same vein as “Speed Demon”, and the same level of quality.

It’s fun to revisit The Right To Rock periodically…but sparingly.

3/5 stars

REVIEW: Talas – If We Only Knew Then What We Know Now… (1998 Japanese/bonus track)

TALAS – If We Only Knew Then What We Know Now… (1998 Warner Music Japan)

The Japanese edition of this Talas live album is something to behold.  It comes with lots of extras:

  • Beefy cardboard slipcase to house the jewel case beneath, plus…
  • A beautiful bonus 22 page photo booklet,
  • Japanese lyric sheet,
  • Two bonus tracks!

The first bonus track is just a shorty, a message from Billy Sheehan.  He briefly explains the history of the band, as much as one can in 34 seconds anyway.  The second bonus track is more interesting and valuable.  It is a vintage studio track called “Doin’ It Right”.  Very pop, but also paradoxically pounding.  It’s not available anywhere else, and it’s not bad at all!  It recalls other early poppy rock tunes by metal bands, such as Quiet Riot and Kick Axe’s obscurities.  One of those Japanese bonus tracks that is worth shelling out for.  But that’s just Common Knowledge!

(The rest of this review was previously publish in 2016)

The Talas story did not end with the breakup of the band.  Of course not; bands both famous and obscure like to reunite for nostalgia shows.  Talas did that in 1997 with the original power trio lineup:  Billy Sheehan on bass, Paul Varga on drums, and Dave Constantino on electric guitar.  With classic material (from the first two Talas albums) and a few unreleased songs, they memorialized their reunion with a brand new live CD.  Billy even pulled his old platform boots out of the closet for this one.

As usual the set opens with “Sink Your Teeth Into That” and an enthusiastic home town crowd.  Talas only sounded better with age.  The original voices are there and just as strong as they were in 1982.  It actually sounds like everyone has improved over the years.  A speedy “High Speed on Ice” is in the second spot ensuring no loss of momentum.  Material from the first self-titled Talas album is included too (unlike the last live album Live Speed on Ice).  “Expert on Me” is very pop in construction, but clearly not as great as the songs from album #2, Sink Your Teeth Into That.  Speaking of which, the slow rumbler “Never See Me Cry” is brilliantly adapted to the stage.

“Power to Break Away” is one of the previously unrecorded songs, and it kicks it just as hot as anything from Sink Your Teeth Into That.  It’s taut with hooks and the prerequisite bass workouts.  “Tell Me True” is the second unreleased song, a slow non-descript dirge ballad that takes a while to get going.

Imagine Billy Sheehan plowing his bass right through a funky Led Zeppelin riff.  That’s “Thick Head”, an awesome track from Talas (1979).  “You” has a cool vibe, almost like an unheard Aerosmith demo from the Done With Mirrors era.  A few other tunes from the first Talas (“Most People”, “Any Other Day” and “See Saw”) are adequately entertaining.  Back to Sink Your Teeth Into That, “King of the World” is still one of the best Talas tunes, overshadowed by only a few like “Shy Boy”.  Here, “Shy Boy” is preceded by a Paul Varga drum solo.  The sheer velocity of “Shy Boy” itself makes me wonder how Varga did it.  It’s just pedal to the metal, blurring the lines and smoking the minds.

Nothing like a good cover to help draw a live album to a close.  Talas did two:  “21st Century Schizoid Man” and “Battle Scar”.  The King Crimson cover is a daring one to attempt.  They somehow manage to strip it down and pull it off with integrity.  As for “Battle Scar”?  Total surprise there!  Max Webster were just across the border from Buffalo, and Billy Sheehan nearly joined Max at one point late in their career.  Introduced by a Billy Sheehan bass solo, this Max/Rush cover is the set closer.  As a final addition, “Battle Scar” surely makes this one hell of an album for the history books.

Since this is a more recent release on a well known label (Metal Blade), it turns out that If We Knew Then What We Know Now is an easy CD to find in the shops.  Fortunately this is a good first Talas album to add to any collection.

4/5 battle scars

 

 

#1060: Max the Axe’s Garage Sale (Trillion Dollar Treats)

RECORD STORE TALES #1060: Max the Axe’s Garage Sale

A huge thank-you to my host Max the Axe today at a fantastic garage sale!  BEHOLD!

“9:00 AM!” he said.  “Serving shots and weed to my Facebook friends starting at 9 AM!”

There was no way I was missing this garage sale.

I only had four hours sleep, and a large Tim Horton’s coffee, to prepare me.  I didn’t think I could make it.  After the events of last night, which left me rocked (in a bad way), I didn’t think I was up for it.  But at 9:00 AM I said “to hell with it, let’s go,” and Jen and I were in the car off to the Trillion Dollar Treats that Max had on offer.

First up:  cassettes!  I picked up six:

  • Poison – Flesh & Blood
  • Metallica – Metallica
  • Van Halen – Diver Down
  • Extreme – II:  Pornograffitti
  • Ozzy Osbourne – No Rest for the Wicked
  • Van Halen – Women and Children First

You can blame Tim Durling for my sudden interest in buying Cassettes That I Already Own On Remastered CDs.  He did point out the Diver Down cassette was an unusual cover variant, with the image slanted taking up the whole cover.

Speaking of Tim Durling…

  • Led Zeppelin – Led Zeppelin IV

I’ve caught the 8-track bug, baby!  Tim remarked that my copy was in better condition than his.  Max had more 8-tracks but none from bands that I collected.

So that’s cassette and 8-track.  What about CD and vinyl?  Maxie has plenty of both, but my tab was starting to rack up.  I gave him $20 for this rare AC/DC longbox, still sealed.

It’s the live “Highway to Hell” single, with long box intact and not in terrible shape.  I used to have CD longboxes, but I foolishly tossed them when I moved, assuming their were worth next to nothing.  Just paper.  But now…

Next up:  Max has been trying to sell me a tape deck for years.  This one was $20, a Kenwood.  My old Sony has seen the better of days, and Max says this one runs perfectly.  I guess we’ll find out soon enough, to try out these new tapes I just bought, huh?

Finally, we have the magazine scores.  Some MAD, some Cracked, some Star Wars, and some music!  Even a M.E.A.T Magazine!  A little bit of everything, and…woah, that’s Lee Aaron!!

Max has so much stuff, and you still have time to get down there.  Kites, speakers, tape decks, collectables, magazines, all killer deals!  Blank media galore.

Am I ever glad I went to Trillion Dollar Treats to see Max the Axe on my Saturday morning.  My Friday was brutal – absolutely brutal.  I am sure you will eventually be reading about it in one way or another.  My real life has a habit of becoming public knowledge, because when I’m hurting inside, I need to get it out.  My only weakness.  Thank you to everyone who sent helpful messages and offered to talk.  I need to single out Boppin, Jex, Tim, James and especially Jen for talking to me last night and this morning.  I love you all.

 

REVIEW: Gordon Lightfoot – Summertime Dream (1976)

GORDON LIGHTFOOT – Summertime Dream (1976 Reprise)

Immediately after Gord’s Gold provided Lightfoot fans with a collection of old and re-recorded hits, Gord made another one:  “The Wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald“.  This mighty song dominated the radiowaves for years over all over the Great White North, arguably granting Lightfoot his most memorable song in his history.  His earlier material from Gord’s Gold and before might be considered the pinnacle of his album-making career, but Summertime Dream isn’t too shabby.

Opening with the musically upbeat “Race Among the Ruins”, but lyrically there is warning here.  “If you plan to face tomorrow, do it soon.”  Don’t let time pass you by.

The nautical disaster song “Edmund Fitzgerald” is second, a mostly historically accurate accounting (within reason) of a great lakes shipwreck.  The great lakes shipwreck.  The stinging guitar lick repeats while the harrowing lyrics induce chills.  Guitarist Terry Clements performed that unmistakable, haunting guitar part, the one that little Canadian kids were dying to learn how to play in their youths.  Did they have any idea they were recording such a timeless song when they were laying down the tracks?  Every feeling, every emotion, every creak of steel and wood can be absorbed through the grooves.  The way Lightfoot paints a picture with words, you feel as if were there. Gene Martynec, who played synth on Lou Reed’s Berlin album, provided light keyboard accents here. You’d miss them if they were gone.

A tender ballad, “I’m Not Supposed to Care”, gently caresses the soul with its light backdrop of pedal steel guitar.  Then, edgier electric guitars back up “I’d Do It Again”, a laid back groove with a country foundation and a rock veneer.  “Never Too Close” also shines with shimmery guitar melodies and a stunning chorus.  Then the somber “Protocol” is a war ballad ranging from days past to the Vietnam War.  “The House You Live In” showcases more pedal steel tones with a warm tune and laid back tempo.  The single “Summertime Dream” is upbeat and bright, recalling hot happy youthful days.  “Spanish Moss” is another lovely song, painting pictures of landscapes we’d like to see. Finally, “Too Many Clues In This Room” closes the album on a dark note, with lyrics aluding to both space and sea exploration.

Not Gordon’s most captivating album, but one without any skips, and one absolute monster of a song.

3.5/5 stars

MOVIE REVIEW: Clerks III (2022)

CLERKS III (2002 Lionsgate)

Directed by Kevin Smith

There was once a time when I would have bought anything with Kevin Smith’s name on it.  Clerks resonated.  Clerks II was side-splitting.  We waited for the next chapter in Dante and Randall’s lives, now owners of the Quick Stop and in control of their own destinies.  And we waited, and we waited, and that film never came.

Then Kevin Smith had a near-fatal heart attack.

Clerks III was scrapped and a new version written.  It is this version that I watched the other night.

I may be the wrong person to review this film.  Take everything you read here with several large grains of salt.

I was not prepared for a movie this dark.  I knew that plot involved Randall having a heart attack and deciding to make a film of his life story.  I did not know how much other tragedies were to come for other characters.  I was triggered a bit by some hospital scenes and didn’t enjoy these bits at all.

I felt that Clerks III was two things:

  • Kevin telling a dark story that reflects where he was at that point in his life.
  • Kevin re-making Clerks.

The movie alternates between these two tones.  I respect the right of a filmmaker to to express themselves in any way they desire, but Clerks III was not the instalment for me.

There was one meta-humour moment with Amy Sedaris having a conversions with Randall involving The Mandalorian, which is funny since Amy Sedaris on that show.  So there are those things still happening, and of course all the self-references back to past movies in the View Askewniverse.  I guess that’s more the movie I wanted, rather than [SPOILER] …all this death.

2/5 stars

 

REVIEW: Savatage – Poets and Madman (2022 glow in the dark vinyl reissue/bonus track)

SAVATAGE – Poets and Madman (2001, 2022 glow in the dark vinyl reissue)

Let us start with this vinyl reissue, before we look at the album proper.  Savatage have done a lovely job of reissuing their catalogue on vinyl, with colours galore, epic packaging, and occasional bonus tracks.  This reissue includes one such track on a bonus 7″ record.  Awesome.

The album comes packaged in a beefy gatefold sleeve, loaded with pictures and graphics.  It’s a double album, plus the bonus single.  It also includes a massive booklet with loads of text, an interview, photos and lyrics.  This reissue was done right.  It is always a pleasure when you have something to read along to while you listen.  The two 12″ records glow in the dark, a fun effect when you feel like turning your lights off and listening in pitch black (which will probably be never).  Unfortunately the records have high surface noise.  The bonus 7″ is a clear tie-dyed or splatter design, and sounds excellent.

The bonus track on the single is an extended version of one of the better album cuts, “Awaken”.  It is almost a full minute longer, with the extra meat at the end of the track.  Almost a full minute of extra guitar gymnastics for you to sink your teeth into.  There is music on only one side of the 7″, with the other side blank.

A totally worthwhile vinyl reissue, while we wait for the arrival of new Savatage in 2024.

 

(The rest of this review was previously published in 2014)

Since the death of Criss Oliva, Savatage had become a much more operatic beast, culminating in the formation of Trans-Siberian Orchestra. Here, there are many changes afoot. Guitarist Al Pitrelli departed for Megadeth, although some of his work is herein. Co-lead vocalist Zach Stevens is also gone, having formed the excellent Circle II Circle. This leaves The Mountain King himself, Jon Oliva, to handle all lead vocals for the first time since 1991’s Streets: A Rock Opera. (A new co-lead vocalist named Damond Jineva was hired for the tour.)

This is another dramatic rock opera, and as soon as the needle hits wax, you hear Oliva’s piano flourishes dominate the opening song, “Stay With Me Awhile”. Much like “Streets”, this song is simply an intro to the story which is about to unfold. This time, Oliva and producer Paul O’Neill weave a tale about an abandoned insane asylum and the ghosts within its walls. On a whole it is a much less satisfying concept than some previous Sava-operas, but it backs up the music just fine. And to be honest, that’s why we’re here — the music.

From heavy rockers like “There In The Silence” (backed by a fat synth riff) to slow dramatic ballads like “Back To A Reason”, this is a well-rounded Sava-disc. It is comparable to previous in quality and direction to rock operas such as The Wake of Magellan or Dead Winter Dead, just without Zach.

As with the aforementioned rock operas, there is always a centerpiece on the album. There had to be a counterpoint-vocal-laden masterwork to make your jaw drop in awe and hit that “reverse” button to hear it all again. This time it is a 10 minute epic called “Morphine Child”. With Zach gone, Oliva sings with multiple backing vocalists but the song is no weaker for it.  I’ll confess that even though I usually listen to albums from front to back, I usually play “Morphine Child” three times in a row.  It’s that incredible.

Other standouts include the single “Commissar” which is loaded with guitar flash, keyboards and riffage.  It also features Trans-Siberian-style backing vocals.  “I Seek Power” sounds like classic Savatage circa Gutter Ballet.  “Awaken” is another number that brings to mind that mid-period Savatage sound.  If some fans thought they had strayed way too far into rock opera, then songs like “Awaken” will appeal to their tastes.  I still like hearing Jon screaming a chorus.

I was underwhelmed a bit by the acoustic “Rumor”, but the song does take off fully electric after a few minutes.   Then there’s “Surrender” which feels like an outtake from Streets, but I didn’t find it as memorable.  So there are a couple duds, who cares?

Poets and Madmen is an excellent album, and it fares well against the other rock operas that Savatage has done. Streets will always be the pinnacle, but Poets and Madmen can hold its own against The Wake of Magellan, and it easily out-does Dead Winter Dead.

4.5/5 stars