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REVIEW: Iron Maiden tribute Food For Thought – Now That’s What I Call ‘Kin Music / What Are We Doing This For? (2003)

A supplement to Dec 12’s bonus episode of 50 Years of Iron Maiden

FOOD FOR THOUGHT – Now That’s What I Call ‘Kin Music / What Are We Doing This For? (2003)

Thanks to Harrison the Mad Metal Man, the world knows about this incredible and unorthodox Iron Maiden tribute album.  Hunt for it and hunt well, for you will want this in your collection far more than the Encomiums and Nativities In Black out there.  Food For Thought (a spoof of Piece of Mind) get it far better than any corporate version could.  Through its 19 tracks, Food For Thought visit every single Maiden album (to date), and even some non-album material.  The tracks are performed in a variety of styles, often imitating the trademark styles of major artists like Deep Purple, Motorhead, AC/DC, and…Kate Bush.  It’s not all metal, but it’s almost all brilliant.  This is a unique and effective tribute album, infinitely listenable and thoroughly enjoyable.  Let’s break it down from first track to last.

1. “Be Quick Or Be Dead”

Not as breakneck.  More of a groove.  Opens with a distorted transistor radio sounding guitar part; very alterna-90s.  There is a second guiltar part in the beginning that sounds inspired by Bruce’s solo Skunkworks album.  The wah-wah pedal in the riff is a nice addition.  The female lead vocals are a change of pace, but the oodles of guitar solos are really tasty.  The chorus is more layered with both male and female vocals.  It’s heresy, but I like this version of the song better than Iron Maiden’s.

2. “Twilight Zone”

Let’s take Maiden to Funk Town!  Unbelievably, this works really well as a horn-inflected funk song.  Like a funkier version of Sledgehammer!  I’ve AI Maiden funk stuff before, but believe us when we say that the human-made kind is way way better.  Don’t listen to AI; listen to this!  Once again, Food For Thought have created a version of an Iron Maiden song that rivals the original.  The horns here are very Bosstones.

3.  “22 Acacia Avenue”

We’ve gone to Funk Town, so now let’s hit the lounge.  Yes, it’s a lounge version of this ode to the oldest profession in the world!   It is largely acoustics and fretless bass, by special guest Chris Dale of Skunkworks!  Though it opens with male vocals, during the “Charlotte” section the song transforms into a full blown Kate Bush homage.  An absolutely genius interpretation and re-imagining.  In many ways, these Food For Thought cover are almost like originals.  This actual arrangement has little to do with Iron Maiden’s!  The piano parts are really completely original.

4.  “Angel and the Gambler”

Our first foray into the Blaze era, which this album does frequently.  This folksy acoustic version is only 2:14 long.  It is either a duet, or mixed with double tracked vocals.  The original should probably have been about this length!  The delicately picked guitars are like a country picnic.  Such a strange re-imagining, but imminently catchy…with a lot less repetition.  There’s even a country hoedown at the end.

5. “Mercenary”

One of the best tracks on the album.  This lesser known track from Brave New World is performed as a Bee Gees homage via “Stayin’ Alive”.  Has to be heard to be believed.  The falsetto vocals aren’t bad, but the funk Disco beats are gonna get your butt shakin’.  The lyrics are a complete contrast to the dancey vibes of the music!  A short one though, as soon we’re off to war…

6. “The Trooper”

Electric violin, with growly metal lead vocals.  Musically it’s reminiscent Canadian fiddler Ashley MacIsaac.  The heavy growl vocals ground it in metal.   There is a even a violin solo to go with what sounds like a fuzzy bass solo.  Toward the middle, it goes into a section possibly inspired by Maiden’s “Mother Russia”.

7. “Fortunes of War”

Blaze era track number two with this dark classic, re-interpreted as an industrial/electronica track, with programmed drums and music, and distorted lead vocals.  The digital beat is bizarrely catchy, and this track can easily become a favourite.  The inspiration might be early Ministry.

8. “Blood on the World’s Hands”

That’s two Blaze tracks from The X Factor, in a row!  They could not be any more different from each other.  “Blood on the World’s Hands” is jazzy, with piano a’plenty and tasty jazz guitars.  This one swings fast and bold.  The scat vocals and drum break are a total delight!

9. “Stranger In A Strange Land”

Back to Somewhere In Time with a song that doesn’t get enough attention.  Here’s some attention for ya!  The mood of the lyrics is captured in this somber, acoustic version with violin as the feature instrument.  The words are based on the lost Franklin Expedition, marooned somewhere in the Arctic ocean far from civilization.  The fabulous guitar solo is pretty much note-for-note to Adrian Smith’s original.  Maiden fans far and wide are likely to enjoy this one, one of the less quirky songs on the album, though still a departure.

10. “Flash of the Blade”

Powerslave time, with a Celtic jig and a violin.  The violin handles the main riff, which is performed with hammer-ons when played on guitar.  Here is the swipe of the bow.  The layered violins also re-create Maiden’s guitar harmonies.  The drum part is a perfect homage to Nicko’s signature original.   This magnificent metal masterpiece translates well to a new genre that we’ll call violin metal!  Unlike many of the other songs on the album, the lead vocal part is true to Bruce’s original.

11. “Wildest Dreams”

Is that Lemmy?  The newest song on the album, from Dance of Death, is clearly done in the style of Motorhead.  Everything about it screams “Lemmy”, from the distorted bass to the accelerated tempo.  And this was already a fast song to begin with!  Now it is breakneck.  An album highlight.

12.  “Futureal”

Best song on the album?  What if Bon Scott replaced Blaze Bayley in Iron Maiden?  This version of “Futureal” from Virtual XI poses that question.   Both the lead and backing vocals could be mistaken for Bon Scott era AC/DC.  The solo sounds like Angus.  There is even an added lyric referencing “Dirty Deeds”!  Honest, it is worth buying the album just for this version, which is so much fun that you’ll play it on repeat.  The tempo and vibe are based on “It’s A Long Way To The Top (If You Wanna Rock ‘n’ Roll)”.  You might even trick your friends into thinking it’s unreleased AC/DC track.  Give it a try!

13. “Nomad”

Very System of a Down/Serj Tankien in the vocals.  Very jokey.  Feels like a polka.  Not an album highlight, but brief.

14. “Sanctuary”

Also brief is this “Speed King” inspired version of the classic Maiden single.  Right to the tempo, distorted organ and the solos, it’s very Deep Purple.  “Speed King” is a great song to base a Maiden cover on; I’m sure they would approve.  If Purple wrote “Sanctuary” in 1970, this is what it would sound like.  The only difference is that this singer doesn’t scream, but he really shouldn’t since is a Paul Di’Anno song, not Bruce.

15. “Innocent Exile”

Another foray into electronica.  The programmed beats and music are accompanied by female lead vocals.  Not bad, because it’s a great Maiden song, but again not an album highlight.

16. “Public Enema Number One”

No Prayer for the Dying is represented here by this lovely acoustic ballad, with mournful vocals, accordion and a fretless bass solo.  Though it is a total contrast to the original, perhaps it captures the mood of the lyrics better than Maiden did it.

17. “Heaven Can Wait”

A wake-up call here as we’re bombarded with upbeat 80s New Wave.  Is the inspiration here the Talking Heads?  Regardless it’s tremendous fun and much shorter than Maiden’s original.

18. “Burning Ambition”

A B-side and a surprising choice at that!  This forgotten Maiden song works better as performed by Food For Thought, as an acoustic folksy version, with mandolin.  It’s all very Rod Stewart circa “Maggie Mae”.  If only it had Rod’s rasp.  This track is a lot of fun, especially if you love Iron Maiden deep cuts.

19. “Seventh Son of a Seventh Son”

Food For Thought chose to close the album with what is normally a Side Two opener, “Seventh Son of a Seventh Son”.  It works brilliantly in this position.  Unlike some of the abbreviated tracks on this album, “Seventh Son” is the full length, well over 10 minutes.  It begins very “No Quarter” (Led Zeppelin) to begin, with that John Paul Jones keyboard sound.  It gets heavy after the middle section, which could top the Maiden original.  The way they use the original music, but play it on different instruments, it fascinating to hear.  A track like this is tricky to re-arrange, but here it is!

Find this album.  Get it in your collection, and enjoy it over and over again.

5/5 stars

 

50 Years of IRON MAIDEN bonus episode: The Greatest Iron Maiden Tribute Album You Never Heard – Food For Thought

50 Years of IRON MAIDEN bonus episode: The Greatest Iron Maiden Tribute Album You Never Heard – Food For Thought

GRAB A STACK OF ROCK #130

This is an episode that we have been looking forward to since the very start of this series.  Tribute albums wouldn’t usually figure into our Iron Maiden story, but this is one that we felt so strongly about that there wasn’t even a question.  Check out Sweden’s Food For Thought, who did the best Iron Maiden tribute you’ve never heard.

With 19 tracks spanning the debut album all the way to Dance of Death, Now That’s What I Call ‘Kin Music / What Are We Doing This For? (2003) is the coolest tribute album you’re likely to hear.  Each track is performed in a unique style, from metal to folk to electronica, often in the style of known artists.  Therefore if you would like to hear “Sanctuary” done in the style of Deep Purple’s “Speed King”, you will hear it on this album.  What if Lemmy was in Iron Maiden?  Or Bon Scott?  All those questions will be answered tonight.

Harrison and Mike break down the album’s 19 tracks, including deep cuts, hits and a B-side. We also play song clips to illustrate our points.  It might not be an easy album to find, but our goal is to get your shopping for Food For Thought at the episode’s conclusion.

We hope you enjoy this episode and ultimately the album!  Tune into the premiere as we always like to interact in the comments.

 

Friday December 12 at 7:00 P.M. E.S.T., 8:00 PM Atlantic.  Enjoy on YouTube.

Past episodes:

Handy YouTube Playlist:

REVIEW: Mötley Crüe – From the Beginning (2025)

MÖTLEY CRÜE – From the Beginning (2025 BMG)

There are two things that Motley Crue are really good at:  Pissing off their fans, and releasing compilations.

In 2019, the Crue released The Dirt soundtrack, featuring four new songs and 14 classics.  In 2025, with the well running very dry, they released From the Beginning, featuring no new songs in its 19 tracks, and just one new version of an old classic.

From the Beginning is at least the 7th Crue compilation of hits, depending on what you count and what you don’t (I’m not counting box sets).  This is a band that has only 10 studio albums.  The well is so dry that this compilation includes several tracks from past compilations.   So much could have been done better.

Let’s start with the fail of the packaging.  It’s always interesting when a band chooses a photo of an old lineup rather than the current one.  The inside fold out also features an old photo, meaning current guitarist John 5 is not pictured here, even though he’s on the album.  There are no liner notes, no credits, just an inner sleeve with eight past Motley Crue logos.  (Corabi’s is of course missing, as are several other mid-period Motley Crue logos.)   It’s cheap grey and black printing, no colour.  Absolutely nothing of value in the packaging for any fan, new or old.

Moving on to the one new version of an old song:  the original 1985 recording of “Home Sweet Home” is remixed to include Dolly Parton, who has reinvented herself as a rocker recently, in duet form.  There have been many successful duets when one artist is recorded many decades later over an old song.  This is not one of them.  It sounds fake, and it sounds silly to have 2025 Dolly singing with 1985 Vince.  The guy’s not dead!  There’s no reason for this, except that 2025 Vince Neil is no match for 2025 Dolly Parton.  This congested sounding remix is truly awful, and not because of Dolly Parton.  When singing without the old Vince backing tracks, she sounds magnificent and still powerful.  Couldn’t they even get John 5 to record a new solo over top?  No; they continue to use Mick Mars on their new releases while publicly attacking him.  With all respect to the incredible Dolly Parton, this version of “Home Sweet Home” shouldn’t even count as part of the Motley Crue discography.

True to its word, From the Beginning is a chronological compilation, beginning with the common Elektra mixes of “Live Wire” and “Take Me to the Top”.  This one-two punch always serves well, and the compilation is off to a good start.  If anything, these songs sound more necessary today than ever, no matter who really played bass (which is very loud on this mastering)!  The crunch of Mick Mars’ guitar belching distortion is a satisfying sound, especially at its most primitive.  The classic suite of Shout at the Devil tracks are “Shout” itself, “Looks That Kill” and “Too Young to Fall In Love”.  Even two past superior compilations, Decade of Decadence and Greatest Hits (1998), didn’t include all three.  Decade featured just two songs per album, and excluded “Too Young”.  Greatest Hits (2009) did include all three, and most of the other songs on this set.  There’s something about these tracks that sound like they might be slightly remixed.  Wikipedia credits them as 2021 remasters, but…there’s something off.

Fortunately for the new fan making their first Motley purchase, the original “Home Sweet Home” is included in the Theater of Pain tracks, along with “Smokin’ in the Boys Room”.  For the old fan, we’ll wish they included something else like “Louder Than Hell”, but fat chance of that.  To the point, there should be a rule that “Home Sweet Home” only appears once on any single disc album.

The usual two from Girls, Girls, Girls (“Wild Side” and the title track) are followed by the usual five (yes, five) from Dr. Feelgood (title track, “Kickstart”, “Without You”, “Don’t Go Away Mad” and “Same Old Situation”).  These exact seven songs also appear on Greatest Hits (2009) though not in the same order, just in the same chunk.  Then, just like Greatest Hits, “Primal Scream” from Motley’s first compilation Decade of Decadence makes it appearance.  This song is like a wake up shot after snoozing through the same-old same-old.

At this point the compilation drops the album-by-album continuity, because as we all know, Vince Neil was fired from the band in 1992 after Decade of Decadence.  Motley doesn’t like to acknowledge several of the post-80s albums in their compilations, including Motley ’94 with John Corabi, and New Tattoo with Randy Castillo.  In this case, they also ignore 1997’s electronica-inflected reunion album Generation Swine and the new songs from the compilation albums of the era.  (These include the aforementioned Greatest Hits which had two new songs, and Red White & Crue which had four, all of varying quality.)  Instead we jump to 2008’s Saints of Las Angeles, a comeback album of sorts, and the last studio album the band would produce to date.  The title track is an appropriate addition and still kicks today with a chorus that is worthy of past glories.

Downhill from here, as we go to the irritating and completely un-memorable “The Dirt (Est. 1981)” from The Dirt soundtrack, itself a greatest hits with four new songs.  The presence of Machine Gun Kelly, who played Tommy Lee in the movie, makes this one a slog and an obvious attempt to lure in new younger fans.  Staying chronological, “Dogs of War” from the recent Cancelled EP is a nice addition since it features the current lineup and John 5 on guitar, but is otherwise forgettable.

Finally, the album closes on the Dolly duet, which we should really refer to as a fake duet since it sounds so achronological, both on the album and as a song.

For a similar but superior listening experience, just buy Greatest Hits, Decade of Decadence, or just the plain old 20th Century Masters, which at least had some text inside.

1.5/5 stars

#1221: $538.00 in Customs?!

RECORD STORE TALES #1221: $538.00 in Customs?!

In September 2023, I received an email from a musician that I will not name.  Below is an edited version of what I received:

Hi!! My name is XXXXX XXXXX, I have a couple of CDs out.   I see that you collect physical media.   If I send you one of each, would you review them for me? XXXXXX XXXX produced and sang back up vocals among other things on the first album.   The second album is acoustic, with XXXXXX XXXXXX playing all acoustic guitars.  I wrote every track on both albums except one song that was XXXXXX‘s… Anyway would love to send you a couple, let me know my brother and have a great day!!

The names that I redacted include a famous musician that I recognized from a fairly big “hair metal” band.  Normally I decline all review requests, because as the sender noticed, I collect physical media and that’s what I review.  For him to offer a couple review copies, I immediately said yes.

I forgot about it for a couple weeks, but eventually received a parcel notification in the mail.  The first things I look at every time a parcel notification arrives are:

  • Pickup date/time (usually next day at 5:00 PM).
  • Customs charges, if any.

My eyes popped when I saw the customs charges.

$538.00!

I had never seen anything so high before.  When I used to order toys in from the United States, I would often get $500 of toys in one box, and the customs would usually be well over $100 for the box.  I’d never seen anything this high before.  What the hell did I order that had $538.00 of customs on it?  I couldn’t think of anything I ordered that would be that expensive.

I called the post office to see if they could tell me who sent the parcel?  That was a headache and a half.  They really did not want to look for the parcel and read me the sender’s name or address.  I was persistent and kept asking.  “All I need to know is who sent me this parcel, because I have no idea what it is or where it came from, and $538.00 is a lot of money.”

They probably have some kind of policy at the post office about revealing information like that over the phone.  However, I was not letting up, and I didn’t want to drive to the post office to look at a parcel that I was very unlikely to pay for.

Finally I was given a first name.  Not a super common version of the first name, so it immediately connected the dots.  It was the guy with the two CDs that he was sending me for review.  Two CDs…for $538.00?  That made no sense.  What the hell did he put for the value of the parcel?  Did he mean to write $20.00, but wrote $2000?  Did he send me 200 CDs instead of two?  I asked how large the parcel was, but Canada Post had already hung up.

I never contacted the guy back, and he never emailed me when his parcel was eventually returned.  I don’t know if he’s still making music or not.  There is at least one other artist (a country singer) with the same name, but I did find his albums on Discogs.  His debut came out in 2009 with a followup in 2021.  Neither are on a label, but the second CD does have a photo of the famous musician from a name band.  Neither album had a selling history.

I wonder what happened to my mystery musician?  I wonder what the customs screwup was?  I’ll never find out now!

 

 

 

 

#1218: When Did You Get Your First CD Player?

RECORD STORE TALES #1218:  When Did You Get Your First CD Player?

 

When I seriously got into music in 1984, cassette was the dominant format in my demographic.  I was 12.  Older kids and adults still bought a lot of records, but when we gathered in the streets, our music was played on portable tape decks:  “ghetto blasters”.  Whether tethered by electrical cords or running free with weak C and D cell batteries, cassette dominated.  Then, one morning, CBC radio was doing a special on a new format:  the compact disc.  Host Clyde Gilmour had the longest running show on Canadian radio, and was known for playing classical and jazz music.  Gilmour’s Albums was the first time I ever heard a CD, but over the radio, it could not be properly appreciated.

In 1987 my cousin and his family came to visit.  They brought with them a CD player and the soundtrack to Good Morning Vietnam.  My biggest takeaway after seeing the format in person myself was there were no side breaks on CDs.  It was a one-sided format.  I had never considered such a thing before.  I didn’t have the imagination to picture a live album without side breaks.  Such a thing had never existed.

It didn’t take me long to discover the temptation of compact disc:  the “bonus track”.  Van Halen’s OU812 was the first CD I spotted with a bonus track called “A Apolitical Blues”.  The Columbia House music catalogue, which we signed up for in 1989, always listed when a format had a bonus track.  Very few records did, but many cassettes and many more CDs did as well.  It was a way of taking advantage of a longer running time without breaks, and to tempt people to make the switch.

For that reason, I officially adapted CD as my newest musical format on Christmas Day, 1989.  My first CDs were Alice Cooper’s Trash, Motley Crue’s Dr. Feelgood, Whitesnake’s Snakebite, and Winger’s debut – with bonus track.  Bob and John Schipper came over to visit during the holidays.  I demonstrated the sound of a CD by putting in Dr. Feelgood, cuing up Time For Change, and letting them listen to the silence at the of the fade.  I cranked it to max.  “No hiss!” I explained.  They didn’t appreciate it the way I did.  Cuing up songs by demand was also a treat.  I remember using it to isolate the track “Ride Cowboy Ride” by Bon Jovi and recording it on its own for cassette.

My first was the Panasonic seen below, atop my parents’ old 8-track deck.  The first of countless many.

I asked some friends for their stories about their switch to CD.  They answered the call, some with pictures.

bicyclelegs:

1990 I think, but I don’t remember the make or model.  By 1990 it was getting harder to find new releases on vinyl in Australia, so my hand was forced to a certain extent. But it was also a financial thing: before 1990 I simply couldn’t afford a CD player.

Dan Chartrand:

Same here for the bonus tracks! Mind you, some cassettes had bonus tracks…and even vinyl had bonus tracks…wish the internet was around to investigate more… My first CD was Dio’s Lock Up the Wolves due to the bonus track that wasn’t on the cassette or vinyl.

Melissa Nee:

I am thinking 87. It was super early.  I started getting CDs from Columbia House before buying in stores. They were pricey.  I think Bon Jovi was $16.

Chris Preston:

1988 for me.  quite honestly it was mostly because a bunch of my friends had CDs and they raved about how great they were. Peer pressure! I had also stopped buying vinyl by that point and I was growing tired of the poor quality of cassettes. It was time to embrace the future with CDs!

Erik Woods:

It was this. Got it some time in the early 90s.

Henry Wright:

I got my first CD player in June 1992. It was a college graduation present from my parents, I think. I had only cassette for many years but already had about 5-10 CDs before I got the player as I had started buying them around 1990-91, I think. Some of them were things I couldn’t find on cassette (typically from the UK), others were just favourite releases I wanted to upgrade. Before I got the player I would make a tape copy for myself on a friend’s. I don’t know if I thought cassettes were an endangered species but I always disliked how often they wore out or were chewed up by the machines and so I was pretty excited about the new format. I never heard of a bonus track until later although I do recall that new CDs often had the same “extra” tracks that cassettes did unlike the LP or 8-track versions.

Matt Phillips:

Summer of 1993; got my first guitar the same month. And it was the Panasonic with the flip top and the jog dial and the ability to skip to the next song on cassettes. This model:

Larry Russwurm:

1988. Most people in residence in Toronto had them already. Someone in residence had one as early as 1986.

Frank Schenker:

The first CD I ever purchased was Surveillance by Triumph. I also bought the cassette tape at the same time in November 1987 and I didn’t even own a CD player. I the spring of 1988, I purchased a Sanyo boom box with a CD player and cassette tape deck.

Rex Smetzer:

1988.  I just have always loved music & was in college at the time, & got it for Christmas.

Todd Evans:

December, 1984. Technics SL-P1.  In early 1984 a local department store had a Magnavox FD1000 on display that you could demo. They had one CD – Rush Moving Pictures. I must have played with that thing for an hour! My parents bought me one for Christmas that year. I remember that a friend bought me two of my first CDs as a Christmas gift – Asia’s first album and Thompson Twins Side Kicks. My parents bought me one to go with the player, but I can’t remember what it was.

It is warming to see some folks embrace the bonus track as I have.  The CD certainly changed our lives when we made the change.  When and why did you make the switch to CD?  Leave your story in the comments below.

VIDEO: 100th Episode Outtake – Harrison’s First CD Collection

Thank you for joining us on Friday April 25 for Grab A Stack of Rock’s 100th episode.  We actually had a lot more material backlogged for that episode, which you’ll be seeing here, so like and subscribe for more!

This fun short video features Harrison walking us through his very first CD collection photo.  You can see Young Harrison was already into Black Sabbath and Iron Maiden, but why, and how?  Harrison walks us through them all in this fun nostalgia (and metal) filled episode.

 

Friday Preview! A Massive Music Haul!

I came home from work last Friday to find not one, not two, not three, not four, but FIVE parcels containing new music!  Of course, if you unbox something these days, you have to do it on camera.  All of this music will receive a closer look on our annual Good Friday Afternoon Show on Grab A Stack of Rock, tomorrow!  However, nothing can top the first look at a musical surprise!

Catch my reaction as I look at:

  • Six versions of the Darkness’ Dreams On Toast album, which will be discussed in more detail on Friday.
  • A brand new EP of previously unreleased music by Mystique!
  • Killer metal from the UK.
  • A surprise gift of a Japanese import.
  • A very special gift from Blotto!

All here in this spontaneous and magical unboxing video!  Tune in tomorrow for our Good Friday show and a deep dive into all this new music, and much more!

VIDEO: Harrison Unboxes Some Metal CDs! (Ode to Jake Not From State Farm)

Readers may not be familiar with Jake Not From State Farm, so let me introduce you.  If you tune in to John Clauser’s channel My Music Corner, he’s done several great videos with Jake.  Additionally, Jake will be joining us later this year for some albums on 50 Years of Iron Maiden.  It turns out that both Jake and Harrison love Blaze Bayley.  And so, they became friends.

Jake had a batch of duplicate CDs that he donated to Harrison’s collection, two of which I want!  That damn Harrison keeps ending up with more and more CDs that I want for myself.

Joining us for this unboxing episode is the man who introduced us to Jake in the first place, Mr. Johnny Clauser.  Mostly, we let Harrison do the unboxing, and lots of show and tell.  Enjoy this short episode.

#1170: The Smaller the Better – Christmas 2024

RECORD STORE TALES #1170: The Smaller the Better – Christmas 2024

2024 was one of our smallest Christmas gatherings, both in budget and in population, but it was certainly one of my happiest.

Sometimes everything just feels right, and this year’s Christmas Eve was held back at the old family home once again.  It was the first Christmas Eve there in over a decade, but that’s my happy place at Christmas.  A place I can feel comfortable.  After all, it was my home for 29 years.  I settled in with my dad and watched Superman the Movie while Jen made cookies.  We awaited the arrival of my mom, Dr. Kathryn, and a few dogs.

Jen knit custom gifts for the dogs (shawls, mittens and hats).  She also knit custom shawls for the ladies, and toques for the men.  I love mine.

As an introvert, I do well in small groups.  Dinner was the traditional beef fondue (or chicken or schnitzel), with bonus vegan options.  I brought over some special flavoured salts and hot sauces to sample.

We did that Christmas “white elephant” game, or whatever you want to call it.  The “$10 gift game” is another name for it.  Initially, I won this cool set of chocolate “coffee bombs”.  I made it very clear how happy I was with it, and that I intended to make myself a coffee as soon as I got home.  I spotted one with little marshmallows and relished the idea of it.  Then my mom went next and stole it.  I stole it back when I had the chance, and then she stole it again at first opportunity.  The funny coda to this story is that after Jen and I got home, we put on a “Best of Saturday Night Live” show and there was a sketch featuring the exact same game.  One character was complaining that it was a mean-spirited game, because he had received the perfect gift for himself, and someone stole it.  I called my mom to laugh about that.  The story doesn’t end there.

Christmas day featured some sleeping in and some Marvel What If? on Disney+.  SPOILER this episode featured a Kiss song as an integral part of the story, and even had a line of dialogue from Howard the Duck explaining that the song was written by Kiss in 1979.

I won the $25 Amazon gift card at the “Christmas pickle” game.  I wasn’t even going to participate, but after seeing Jen and Dr. Kathryn getting nowhere, I entered the fray.  I quickly boxed Dr. Kathryn into a corner, where she was unable to see the front of the tree, where my mom had announced the pickle to be.  Once spotted, I used the pickle to order the new Van Halen For Unlawful Carnal Knowledge box set.  It’ll be here Saturday.

There were some really cool items in my grab bag this Christmas.

I had hoped someone would get me Brothers by Alex Van Halen, and Dr. Kathryn came to the rescue there.  It’s a beautiful looking book, and emotional too from what I have read while skipping through.

Bubbles from the Trailer Park Boys has a new album out with standards new and old:  Longhauler: The Best of Bubbles and the Shitrockers.  If you need to ask, don’t.  I was surprised that the album was produced and engineered by Eddie Kramer!

Queen’s A Night at the Odeon (1975) is another album that came highly recommended.  I wishlisted it and it magically appeared in my stocking thanks to my parents.  It looks like a winner.

Finally, some anniversary editions from Jen:  Judas Priest’s Rocka Rolla, and Twisted Sister’s Stay Hungry.  Rocka Rolla is probably the best album remix I have heard in my life.  Tom Allom pretty much just made the album sound like itself, but beefier.  As if you had always heard it distant and muffled, and now you can hear it fully for the first time.  As if you just got a new stereo and are hearing this music properly for the first time.  As for Twisted, I find it funny that I already own the 30th anniversary edition, with a very different set of bonus music.

Of interest:  this is probably the 3rd time I have received Rocka Rolla for Christmas.  It is my 2nd for Stay Hungry at Christmas time.

As usual, I received some treats and games, including two more editions of Uno to play at the cottage this summer.  My mom got me some Trailer Park Boys pickle flavoured chips, and who knew that such a thing existed?

As for my mom, she used to do this thing when we were kids, where she would take a larger box of candy and split it up into smaller gifts that could fit into stockings.  She did that for me this year…with her chocolate coffee bombs that she got the night before.  She gave me one of each flavour, since I had called about the Saturday Night Live sketch.  Thanks mom.  You win this time.

Hope everyone had as merry a Christmas as we did!

#1169: Discontinuing the Tapes

RECORD STORE TALES #1169: Discontinuing the Tapes

In 1995, the writing was on the wall.  After struggling for years as a new CD/tape store, the boss discovered a goldmine:  selling used CDs.  The story has been told a dozen times or more, but the short version is this.  In early 1994, the boss brought a small tray of used CDs into the store, priced them, and they sold out immediately.  I think the discs came from his own collection with a few from his brother.  He realized that he could buy used CDs from the public for a few bucks, and then flip them for double or triple the price.  The hunger days ended soon after.

Profit margins on new CDs and tapes was slim.  After you factor in shipping, overhead, paying the part-timers, and an expensive magnetic security system, the boss was left with little for himself, if nothing at all.  He could not survive like that forever.  With used CDs, he could control his own costs.  This was something rare in retail.  Costs are usually determined by your supplier.  You could negotiate for better rates, but it was nothing compared to used CDs.  We could pay five or six bucks for a CD, and sell it for ten or twelve bucks.

You know what happened next.  Expansion!  Waterloo opened, followed by a second store in Kitchener.  These stores had 90% used stock, with a small chart for new releases.  They didn’t carry cassette tapes, at all.  While this surprised me, it was a smart move.  We were ahead of the curve by not carrying cassettes in those stores.   We didn’t even carry used tapes.  For one, it was harder to check them for quality compared to CDs.  For second, it simplified things greatly by only focusing on discs.  One product, one display system, one storage system.  You could take the disc out of the case, hide it behind the counter, and put the empty case on the shelf.  The security system was replaced in this simple way.

Eventually the original Stanley Park Mall store had to close.  Rent in malls is higher than that in plazas.  It was the only store that still carried a full selection of new CDs and tapes.  It closed at the end of 1995, right after Christmas.  And we weren’t allowed to tell people we were closing.  Technically, it was a move.  A new location had been procured in Cambridge.  It too was to follow the 90% used model.  Although we called it a move for the purpose of good optics, the reality was that one store closed and another very different store opened in another city.  The manager was the same, and they took the unsold stock and sold it as used, but it was a new store.

Closing Stanley Park put us in an awkward position.  In 1995, we lived in what was essentially a two format world:  CDs first and foremost, with cassettes still strong, but dying off bit by bit every year.  More and more releases were coming out on CD only.  Vinyl?  In 1994, only Pearl Jam had a mainstream vinyl release.  We carried Vitalogy on vinyl.  It was beautiful.  The boss opened a copy to look at it.  He ended up selling that one to his brother.  But what about that awkward position?  Here we were, going into the Christmas season and selling gift certificates to a small but significant number of people who still only had cassettes players.  We were selling gift certificates to people who were not going to be able to redeem them for cassettes except for a small window:  the six days following Christmas.  Many of those people had been customers for five years, since we opened.

“If someone complains about it, tell them to talk to me, I’ll take care of it.”  The boss was not the kind of person who relished giving people their money back, but I am sure he handled those cases as best he could.  We did special order cassettes for customers for a short period of time in some of these cases; they were isolated cases.  We had some cassettes returned in the new year as well, which had to be dealt with.

I do remember some angry customers.  “Where am I gonna buy my tapes now?” asked one guy who was unhappy, to say the least, that we were closing up, moving to a new location, and ceasing cassettes completely.  I suggested the HMV store at the other mall, but even they were noticeably cutting back.

For me, it was interesting to have lived through these changes in formats.  As a fan, I watched vinyl decline in importance to the point where nobody in highschool bought records anymore.  That was 1986.  Then I lived through the advent of CD, and its eventual replacement of the cassette.  I was working in the front lines at the Beat Goes On when Napster came along, and I saw shelf space once reserved for CDs now showcasing bobbleheads.

I wouldn’t trade it for the world.  All apologies to the inconvenienced!