rush

Part 54: Stalkers

Flashback: July 1994.

When I first started at the store, my first day, my new boss gave me the orientation.  We were both young, early 20’s.   It went very well.  I was excited.  I’ll never forget one thing he said:

I think you’ll find that it’s hard work, but rewarding and fun work.  You get to listen to music while you work, the discount is really good, and you’ll meet so many girls here.  Trust me, this is the best place to meet them.

That proved not to be the case.

Flash forward:  June 2004.

In the 10 years since, I had not once — not even once! — dated a girl through work.  Granted I’m kind of an idiot when it comes to girls.  Never did know how to talk to them without sounding like the biggest idiot in the world.  Also I somehow pick up a stutter when talking to them.

Anyway, year after year, I stuttered my way through a decade of probably talking like an idiot in front of hundreds of female customers.

One sunny afternoon in June, I was working the late shift.  It was a really nice day, a “windows open” kind of day.

I was working with this guy Matt.  Around 6 or so, I had to step out to pick up some boxes from another location.  Rush, “Summertime Blues” was on the radio, the first time I ever heard it.  When I returned to the store about 45 minutes later, I said, “Matt!  Holy shit man, I just heard the new Rush from their covers album.  It’s amazing man!”

Ignoring me, he said,”Did you see those two blonde girls in the store before you left?”

I said, “Yeah, the two hot ones?”

Matt responded, “Well one was hot, the other looked like the Angry Walrus.  That one left you a note.”

He handed me a piece of yellow paper with a kitten on it.  It just said “Paula” and then a phone number.

“Seriously?” I asked him.

“Seriously.  I wouldn’t make something like this up, man.”

Good enough for me.  The one he referred to as “the so-so one” looked good to me!  The glorious prophecy of my boss has come true!

I called the number on the paper and we agreed to go out for coffee.  I asked her about the note she left, I told her that’s never happened to me before.  She told me she was there with her friend, she noticed me there, but I left before she could hand me the note personally.  So she asked Matt if he could give me her note.

We went out four or five times, but it clearly wasn’t happening.  And that’s where it gets weird.

When she sent me the “Let’s just be friends,” email, she added a double whammy for me.  She told me that the story about seeing me in the store and leaving the note was actually a frabrication.

See, she’d see my profile on some site somewhere, and I must have said that I worked in a record store in the tri-city area.  Rather than get an account and send me a message like a normal person would, she tried something different.

“Well,” she began, “in your profile you said you worked in a CD store.  You said you were from the KW-Cambridge area.  There was a picture of you there, so I figured I could just checking stores until I found you.”  Pardon?  “I’m sorry I lied about just walking in and seeing you there.  Anyway, you’re cool and I’m cool but it’s just not happening, so…”

So…that was mildly creepy and I didn’t feel so bad about it not working out after that!

Part 52: Air Guitar

RECORD STORE TALES Part 52:  Air Guitar

I can’t help it.  When a good song comes on, it’s an unconscious reaction:  I start strumming the chords in air guitar…beating the air drums…slappin’ da bass!  (Nobody plays air keyboards.)

Everybody around me was embarrassed to the nines.  But you can’t stop the rock!

I jumped on counters.  I even once jumped down on the floor and did the Angus Young spinny spinny thing.  When there were no customers.  Sometimes I had to jump right off the counter as a guy was coming in.

“Yeah…heh…just playing some air guitar…”

The first time I was ever caught playing air guitar at work, it was actually at my first job at the grocery store.  I was working in the parcel pickup area, and it was March break, about 11 in the morning, and it was dead down there.  So they get you to sweep up the area, clean it up real good.  And we had a tape deck down there.  Well, I started playing air-broom-guitar when one of the assistant managers walked in.  He just smiled.  Probably thought I was half out of my mind.

My air guitar at weddings is now legendary.  It is now tradition that I get down on the dance floor and do the Angus Young spinny-spinny during “You Shook Me All Night Long”.  Last time, I did it in a kilt.  Don’t worry, I didn’t wear the kilt “traditionally”.

Air guitar is an expression of one’s connection to the rock.  If the rock connects, then the air guitars come out.  Next thing you know, you’re doing Van Halen on the countertops, pretending it’s the “Hot For Teacher” video.  It happens!

 

MOVIE REVIEW: Rush – Beyond the Lighted Stage (blu-ray)

 

 

RUSH – Beyond the Lighted Stage (blu ray, directed by Sam Dunn)

OK, as a Rush fan, I am biased. I loved Beyond The Lighted Stage. For those who are not Rush fans, I am sure you will enjoy Kim Mitchell’s description of Geddy’s voice. (“Like a cat stuck in the door with a blowtorch up its ass!”)

This blu-ray looks absolutely amazing in beautiful 1080p. Consisting mostly of interview footage, Sam Dunn and co. have created another fantastic, glowing, appreciative documentary. Gathering up such fans as Mitchell, Billy Corgan (who is a SERIOUS fan), Trent Reznor, Les Claypool, Jack Black, and Sebastian Bach, Rush is finally given the movie treatment that they deserve. Dunn covers the early years, the 80’s, Neil’s tragedies, and beyond. Outside of Neil’s books, I have never heard him speak about his personal tragedies before. This was especially enlightening.

Amazingly, somebody in the Lifeson clan had a camera rolling at the dinner table one night when a 16-year-old Alex told his father that he wanted to quit school and do music full time. It is hard to believe such footage exists, but here it is. Such footage is very special, but only one of many such moments in Beyond The Lighted Stage.

Bonus features are fantastic. A hilariously tipsy dinner at a hunting lodge gives you that fly-on-the-wall feeling. A revealing bit with Geddy and manager Ray Danniels sheds light on the day that Geddy was fired very early in the band’s career. Live footage of “Working Man” with Rutsey on drums is a blu-ray first. Samples of other Rush DVDs give you some more music to sink your teeth into. A little bit more detail on Hemispheres, Presto, and Roll The Bones are also available as bonus features. This is just a portion of the generous bonus features included.

Certainly, since they still have not been inducted into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame, Rush have not achieved the ultimate in mainstream appreciation. This movie goes a long way into making up for it. Best of all, it maintains the feeling that Rush fans are in a secret underground club — those who “get it”. This is “our” band, not “theirs”. Now you can get the whole story, the way the Rush fans see the band.

Enjoy. 5/5 stars.

Part 27: Store Play

Another suggestion from Tommy Morais, my Amazon rock buddy from the east!  He wants to read about glam rock bands, and Canadian bands!  I played a lot of each at the store, especially in the earliest days.  I’m gonna throw some prog and metal in here too.  Here’s some of my fondest memories.

LeBRAIN’S STORE-PLAY CLASSICS!

1996.  We had just opened our flagship store, and I was selected as manager.  This meant I’d be working alone for most of the day, and I could play what I wanted.  In the earliest days there were fewer rules.  The boss might make fun of me for playing Poison, but in the old days, he never told me to take it off as long as it was only once in a while.

I remember playing glam metal stuff like:

PoisonNative Tongue.  I enjoyed trying to turn kids onto music they’d like, but would never touch if they knew who it was.  It sometimes worked!  I think I sold one copy of Native Tongue that way, anyway.

Motley Crue – self titled.  This is in my top three Motley records of all time.  The one without Vince Neil.  A guy from the HMV store in Waterloo gave me props for playing it.  I once sold it to a guy who hated the latest Crue, Generation Swine.  I turned him onto self titled instead.  Instant fan.

David Lee RothYour Filthy Little Mouth.  I played this a shit-ton in the spring of 1995 too.  I don’t know why I like it so much, it’s so cheesey.  Dave does country!  Dave does reggae!  Dave does jazzy loungy stuff!  Dave does VH!  But Dave does write hilarious lyrics, and I did like that.

Van Halen – Any time, any where, any how.   But any time we had a copy of 1984?  Hell yeah!  And you couldn’t keep Best Of Volume I in stock for very long.  Certainly not if you played it.  The first year or two it was out, I probably sold it every time I played it!

Def LeppardSlang.  Again, much like the Poison and Crue, I was trying to turn new kids onto these classic bands that had explored new directions.  Unfortunately, Slang sold like shit.  I think it was too different for the old fans, and too old for the new fans.

And now let’s talk about Prog rock.  Ashleigh used to call prog music “smart-guy rock”.   That’s one reason why I wanted to play it every shift we shared.  I was trying to show her I was a smart guy, see?

MarillionMisplaced Childhood.  I played Marillion so frequently, that my co-workers Matty K and Ashleigh knew the words to some songs.  Unfortunately, they didn’t consider that a good thing.

Fish Kettle of Fish.  See above!

Dream TheaterImages and Words.  This came in so rarely, that when it did you had to play it.  It always sold if you played it.  We had so many musicians and wanna be’s (like me) coming into the store, they inevitably would ask what the fuck is this?  This one kid, a drummer named Curtis, loved Dream Theater.  I sold him his first Dream Theater.  Do you know how cool that is, selling somebody their first Dream Theater?  Curtis is a fantastic musician.  He’s jammed with my sister, actually.

RushMoving Pictures.  Like nails on a chalkboard to the girls in the Operations staff.  Could not play this if they were in the city, let alone the store.  But my fuck, what an album.  I remember Tom put a sticker on it that said, “Best album of the 80’s!”.  I thought to myself, “Then I need to hear the whole thing!”  I had never heard “Vital Signs” before.  I am sure Matty K remembers to this day, “Everybody got to evelate from the norm”.

And speaking of Rush!  I did a lot of Canadian themes.  We had a 5 disc changer.  A lot of the time, I would specifically pick 5 Canadian artists to take up a shift.  You’d often hear:

Sloan4 Nights at the Palais Royale.  In my opinion one of the top five live albums of all time.  It is also my favourite Sloan album.

Stompin’ Tom Connors – Anything we had in the store would work, as he didn’t come in frequently.  Unfortunately, Stompin’ Tom didn’t fare too well for store play in Kitchener.  Nobody seems to like him in this town.

Rush – duh?

Triumph – ditto.

Kim Mitchell / Max Webster – Another artist our Operations people hated.  I did one entire 5 disc shuffle of nothing but Kim and Max.  Kim was playing in town that day so I was hoping to drum up some sales.  I failed to do so, but I did try.  I was told to remove the Kim and Max from the player.

Helix / Brian Vollmer – I’d play Helix when it was in, which was infrequent.  I remember playing the Brian Vollmer solo album for Kevin, one of the guys that ended up in my wedding party.  I played the song “Good Times Don’t Get Better Than This” in the store.  I thought he would enjoy it.  Unfortunately, he did not.  I believe the words he used were, “This is not good.”  Kevin, I kindly submit that I strongly disagree to this day.

Even more rarely though came the opportunity to play the early stuff, the stuff with Brent Doerner singing lead.  Once — just once — Breaking Loose and White Lace & Black Leather came in.  I’m kicking myself for not buying them.  But when they were in store, I played “Billy Oxygen” on repeat for about 20 minutes.

Oscar Peterson – I only had the opportunity to do that once though.

Voivod – self titled.  The first one with Newsted.  Metallica had come out with St. Anger and a lot of fans didn’t like it.  I tried to sell this, which was more traditionally prog metal like old Metallica.

Incidentally, at the same time,  I was training a new franchisee around that time.  He was amused by how excited I was that the album Angel Rat, by Voivod, had come in, with 3D glasses intact.  I explained that usually these would be missing, but the CD was mint!  And “Clouds In My House” sounded great in-store!

Voivod crosses the boundary from prog into metal (or is it vice versa?), but I certainly did play a lot of metal in the store.

Bruce DickinsonBalls To Picasso.  I played this virtually every shift during the fall of 1994.  At the time, I thought “Tears of the Dragon” and “Change of Heart” were among the deepest songs I’d ever heard.  Yeah, well.

Iron MaidenBrave New World.  I love this album.  Matty K knows every word of “Blood Brothers”.

G//Z/RPlastic Planet.  Easily the heavist thing I have ever played in store.  Even I was uncomfortable!

sHeavyThe Electric Sleep.  Incidentally, the greatest Black Sabbath album that was not made by Black Sabbath.  Every time, people would ask, “Is this the new Ozzy?”  Every time.  You could put money on it.

Judas PriestTurbo.  It was the only one I could get away with!

Man, those were good times!   I am sure I could write another dozen of these.  I mean, we played a lot of music.  From Esquivel to Brushy One-String to Pansy Division to Jaymz Bee & the Royal Jelly Orchestra, we tried and sampled everything.

Part 20: I Believe In A Thing Called Love

I’m going to jump ahead.  My wife does not feature into the story until very close to the end, although she is a critical component to it.  I think it’s only fair that I introduce her early.   Jen has, shall we say…good but “flawed” taste in both music, and hockey teams.  (Take a guess which one.) 

RECORD STORE TALES PART 20:  I Believe In A Thing Called Love

When I met Jen in 2005, I knew I had met someone special.  I knew this was something I didn’t want to screw up.   I didn’t know one day we’d be married, but we might never have met if not for music.

It started with Stompin’ Tom.  I think I had told her that I had a stack of new movies, a huge bag of chips & a case of Red Bull, and was ready for the weekend or something.  She responded, “Sounds like you’re ready for a Sudbury Saturday Night.”  So right then and there, boom!  She was speaking my language.

Yes, Jen loves Stompin’ Tom.  I said she had flawed taste in music?  She still thinks Kurt Cobain is the greatest songwriter since John and Paul.  See what I mean?   Her favourite radio station is the grunge one on satellite radio.  I can only take so much grunge in my daily diet.

We bonded over a mutual love of the Beatles, Foo Fighters, Johnny Cash and the old school of country.  She was brought up on a steady diet of Beach Boys and oldies, where I had heard a lot of movie soundtracks and country music growing up.

There are some things I’ll never turn Jen onto.  I know that Kiss and Rush are a completely lost cause with her.  However, lemme tell you a lil’ secret that Jen doesn’t want people to know about.

One night we were coming home from a party at Lara’s house.  I was driving, and Jen had a couple drinks.  (She used to drink wine back then.)  We were coming back to my place after midnight on the 401.  I had Iron Maiden’s latest, A Matter of Life and Death, on the car stereo.  Jen was leaning back enjoying the drive, and then she sat up.

“Who are these guys?” she asked.

“This is Iron Maiden,” I responded.  The song playing was “For The Greater Good of God”, one of their more epic pieces.

I could tell she was really getting into it.  I kept glancing over at her.

“These guys…are…amazing!” she blurted out.  “This music is…wow!”

She claims to this day it was just the booze, but every once in a while, I play that song, and I catch her singing along.

Our wedding was pretty amazing.  For the ceremony itself, we had a Beatles theme.  The girls came in to an acoustic version of “Something” by George, solo.  We signed the register to “In My Life” by Johnny Cash.  We exited to “Here Comes the Sun”.  It was gorgeous outside.

My sister Kathryn played the cocktail hour at the reception with a jazz trio.  Her set ended with their rendition of John Williams’ “Cantina Band” from the first Star Wars!  Bass clarinet as the lead instrument, with guitar and drums backing…it was the perfect wedding version.

Into the dinner, I snuck in some Zappa (“Peaches En Regelia”) and some Kiss (“And Then She Kissed Me”)  We danced to more Beatles, tons of AC/DC, The Darkness, GN’R, and other good stuff.  I had the best music of any wedding I’ve ever been to.

And all because I have the best wife!