Today’s chapter of Record Store Tales is a direct sequel to Part 35.5: Spoogecakes!
RECORD STORE TALES #902.5: Spoogecakes 2 – Electric Boogaloo
LeBrain HQ has eyes and ears everywhere! We are like Hydra: cut off one head and two shall takes its place.
If you recall, when I launched this site in 2012, I had one anonymous hater. Really nasty, too. You can read the comments yourself. This came right out of the blue. The identity of the hater was confirmed by one of her co-workers at the Record Store: an employee there at a location I once managed. I had barely begun publishing my stories. “Grow up or shut up,” went one of the kinder comments. This only inspired me to keep writing, with more energy and frequency. Obviously I had struck a nerve! I actually owe this hater a huge thanks. The drama she created catapulted me into another level, and the hits have only increased in the years since. She provided the launchpad, so I do owe her my gratitude. Craig Fee dubbed her with the nickname “Spoogecakes”, and I ran with that name for the Record Store Tales that followed. I turned her hatemail into a chapter of the story. Lemons into lemonade.
Hey, you wanna troll Record Store Tales? Then Record Store Tales will troll you right back. Some of my former co-workers there thought it was incredibly nasty of me exploit her vitriolic comments for views the way I did. (What they thought of her actions — my so-called friends who were groomsmen at my wedding — they didn’t share that with me.) I hadn’t planned on writing about her at all. She was a non-entity and completely unimportant to my story. She wrote herself in, as far as I was concerned.
Fast forward to the present: she’s still at the Record Store, and just as endearing as ever. A few months ago, I was just sitting here boppin’ through my day, when I got an email from a source bearing a tidbit of inside gossip. My source revealed that Spoogey has been promoted to a manager of some kind, and isn’t the kind you’d want to work for. I have obscured certain text to protect the identity of the informant, but the bones of their message are below.
“[Spoogecakes] is training someone, and that person has to leave home at 4 AM to get to the store, to suit [Spoogey’s] needs.”
Good luck with training someone after they’ve spent five hours on a bus. Hope that worked out for ya. Stuff like that never happened when I was training. I drove people to and from training if I had to. (Ask Shane.)
The training in question involves a box of used CDs that we would use to practice buying techniques. How to check the discs for quality, how to check inventory, and how to price them. The process of this training was previously detailed in Part 94: Staffing. (You can also watch a demonstration of me doing this in a live stream from last year.) In all my time at the store, I never made anyone get up at 4 AM for this. The story continues:
“In retaliation, the trainee wanted to leave a surprise for [Spoogey] in the box of used discs. I got the impression it was a used sex toy. The plan was for her to find it in the box with the other used items.”
My source said that the gist of the conversation was that “no one likes [Spoogey]. The manager of the store was in disbelief of her antics.” The source also suggested that the conversation would have been a lot worse and more graphic if there were not customers in the store.
Some things never change!