RECORD STORE TALES Part 229:  Silent Knight

In a previous chapter, I talked about my early online musical presence in 1994.  Before creating the Record Store’s original online ads, I also got an early start to writing reviews.  The early reviews weren’t very good, but I definitely tried.  Unfortunately back then, there wasn’t much of an online audience for reading reviews of rare Motley Crue EPs!

I did make contact with a few other music fans and collectors in the area.  One guy went by the online handle of “Silent Knight”, named after the classic 1980 Saga album.  He seemed like a nice enough guy, although I soon learned that first impressions can be deceiving.  He had a party at his house that I went to, and it was cool.  I overlooked the fact that he was in his 30’s living in his parents’ house.  I also overlooked his absolutely massive collection of porno videos.  If I recall correct (and I think I do because the subject came up), the VHS tapes adorned one whole wall of their living room.  Turns out Silent Knight was not just into watching, but also into making.

You can trust me when I say I was more interested in his record collection.  He had a great batch of rarities, including some that I wanted.  He invited me over for a recording session, where he taped me the classic Brian May & Friends EP, Star Fleet Project.  He had this crazy blank tape with a metal shell.  I don’t know what the tape was that I used anymore, but the tape that I chose was shite and the recording was almost unlistenable.  However, I also recorded from him some Glass Tiger B-sides for my sister, Black Sabbath’s Seventh Star, and the immortal “Rodeo Song” by Showdown.

Silent Knight and I had a falling out after that.  He made some antisemetic comments.  I don’t know if he was serious or just trying to get a reaction.  I decided to cut him loose, as I didn’t need that kind of negative personality in my circle of friends.  Good thing I did.  Turns out the guy was a total creep.  I know, the guy with the wall of porn VHS tapes was a creep?  Who could have predicted that?

Months and months later, some time in ’95, I started getting emails from somebody else new to the online world, but having learned my lesson I kept my distance.  Later he asked me an odd question.  “Hey, I heard you totally called the cops on somebody else that posts on these boards!  That’s cool man!  Who was it?”

I told him that he must have me confused with somebody else.  Then he revealed himself to be none other than Silent Knight under another handle!  Apparently, someone had called the cops on him regarding his Wall O’ Porn.  I don’t know any details about what he had in the Wall O’ Porn (I really was not interested in checking out somebody’s porn collection) so I have no idea for what reason the cops would have been called, or by whom.  He said I was his only “enemy” who had seen his collection, therefore I was his number one suspect for ratting him out to the cops.  He was trying to get me to confess with his fake account.  The funny thing is, even after he failed (since he had the wrong guy) he still thought it was me.

After I got over his baffling behaviour, my fury set in.  I told him to leave me alone or someone would definitely be calling the cops.  I blocked him on every email I had and never heard from him again.

And just a few weeks ago, I finally got a proper listenable copy of Star Fleet Project on vinyl.  Suck on it, Silent Knight!