GETTING MORE TALE #456: An Anniversary to be Celebrated
Christmas is a stressful time of year, and that goes double when you work retail.
Today is the 10 year anniversary of one of the most stressful but important days of my life.
Although it wasn’t much of a plan, at one point I figured I could turn the record store in a career. The Boss Man had sold a few of us on that idea. “Within five years, I want to have 100 stores across the country, and you’re going to be a big part of it.” I heard that, T-Rev heard that…a number of us heard that. We grew store by store, but downloading slowly put the brakes on that. After The Great Change (Napster and the like) I eventually came to the realization that my career plans were not going to work out. However depression and despondency grew within me, and one particular supervisor made my life at work hell for years. I could not pull myself out of that rut. Finding new work wasn’t easy either. Deep inside, I knew that I would have to reach a breaking point before I was truly ready to move on from the job I once loved.
That breaking point happened 10 years ago today, December 19 2005. They pushed me one step too far, and made demands that I later found out they could not make. I finally worked up the courage to say “I quit”. That was the last straw; I had been shoved around that place for way too long. The true story of this happening can be found in Record Store Tales Part 320: End of the Line, if you want to read how it went down that day.
Short version: Second best decision I ever made.
(The best decision I ever made my marrying my wife!)
I love music so much, and having a job working with music every day? Why, that’s the dream job isn’t it? And it was, for several years. I’m glad to have done it. Without the store I would have no Record Store Tales, and my collection today would be but a fraction of its size. Moving on from something you once loved can be a hard thing. “Maybe this will be the year it gets better again,” I said a few times. When a relationship becomes toxic, sometimes the only way for both parties to be happy is to move on.
10 years ago, I made the serious decision to make the break after 12 years of joy and pain. The funny thing I just realized is, while Record Store Tales could not exist if I never worked at the Record Store, they also could not exist if I never quit! They would have continued to gather dust on a hard drive, because I wouldn’t have been able to tell the stories under confidentiality restrictions, and that would have ripped my heart in two had I stayed.
Things worked out for the best! Thanks for reading along. And if you haven’t, it’s not too late. You can read all 320 chapters of the original one-and-only Record Store Tales right below.* Happy anniversary!
15 minutes ago, I was sitting in my theater seats. That’s how fresh this review is!
As mentioned in this morning’s post, Star Wars Episode VII is the movie I really wanted to see, ever since 1983. We didn’t care about backstory, we didn’t want to see prequels. All we cared about was “What happens next? What happens to Han, Luke and Leia?” That’s one reason Timothy Zahn’s written sequel, the “Thrawn Trilogy”, was so well received by fans worldwide. But that’s just a book — what really happens after the second Death Star is destroyed?
Now I know, and I am not disappointed.
Director JJ Abrams has re-captured the magic. The lived-in universe is back. The wooden, stiff dialogue and exposition are gone. The new quartet of leads (Adam Driver, John Boyega, Oscar Isaac, and especially the impressive Daisy Ridley) are everything we wanted out of a new generation of Star Wars heroes and villains. They will now join the pantheon of characters that live on in our hearts. The camaraderie and friendships that were never believable in the prequels have finally come back to life. Without the misguided hands of George Lucas at the tiller, the Star Wars sequel trilogy has begun anew, with life.
Rey is a scavenger on the desert planet of Jakku. The parallel here to Tattooine is unmistakable and obviously intentional, but Jakku has its own charm by being strewn with original trilogy space junk. In fact, the whole movie is littered with original trilogy callbacks, from certain objects on a familiar starship, to the overall look and deco of the universe. The galaxy has seen a lot of wear and tear, but a new threat called the First Order has risen, and wants to see the end of the New Republic. The Republic (which we don’t get to see much of), is defended by a secret organization much like the rebels, called the Resistance. They are led by General Leia Organa, continuing on doing what she knows how to do best. How does Rey fit in? When a droid carrying a secret message for the Resistance (sound familiar?) and an ex-stormtrooper fall into her life, it will never be the same again.
Uber-fans will like to know that there are some shots and lines in the trailers that are different in the movie.
The new characters serve the archetypes that worked in classic Star Wars movies. You have an orphan on the desert world, a hotshot pilot (or perhaps two), and the cute but witty little droid who helps out at all the right moments, but mostly needs rescuing. Original? Not hardly. The original trilogy, with its familiar set pieces and dialogue, are omnipresent. Fans have set the bar much lower since the prequels, and a group of re-tread heroes will have the fans satiated. Then we have the villain, Kylo Ren, the enforcer of the First Order, and face of the Disney marketing campaign. Much has been made of Ren’s wimpy voice, but in full theater sound it works much better. Adam Driver, an extremely talented and distinguished looking actor, fit the role like a glove. His epic temper tantrums rival those of his idol, Lord Vader himself.
But don’t worry. There aren’t any dreadful “Noooooooooo’s” or lines about sand being course and getting everywhere. There aren’t wishy-washy speeches about love, although Finn and Rey have a bond that could develop into romance later on. Writer Lawrence Kasdan, who worked on the classic trilogy and knew where Lucas wanted to take this thing, helped tremendously. From opening crawl to final scene, this feels right.
In many respects, The Force Awakens is Han Solo’s movie. When he and Chewbacca hook up with our new heroes (in a totally believable way), he takes over the lead and drives the plot forward. Harrison Ford seems to have turned his “Han Solo” knob up to 11. The older, wiser and sadder man has seen it all, now. As another character once said, “It’s not the age, it’s the mileage”. Solo and Chewie’s presence make the whole thing really feel like Star Wars.
My biggest concern going into this was that a Star Wars sequel trilogy would not feel like it was part of the whole; it would feel tacked on to the end. That is not the case. While George Lucas had nothing to do with the film, it does carry his wish that a new Star Wars trilogy would focus on a new generation of heroes, while remaining a story about the Skywalker family. JJ Abrams has done that, in an appropriate and lively way. The new Star Wars is the most exciting in many years, and what it lacks in originality it makes up in spirit. I can’t wait to see where it goes next.
My only serious beef is about this new superweapon the First Order have. Superweapons are a part of Star Wars, and always require blowing up. This one made no sense at all, especially how it was visually depicted. We need Neil DeGrasse Tyson to do a pop-up video and tell us just how stupid that thing is. If you thought the “red matter” and destruction of Vulcan sucked in Star Trek, wait until you see this stupid thing. Just pretend it makes sense and watch the pretty starship dogfights.
Oh, and Luke Skywalker? Some will be disappointed, but those who love Star Wars will have the same goosebumps that I did. Mark Hamill is the man. Luke is back, looking weary but powerful and wise. There are a lot of loose ends to tie up. Get ready, galaxy.
4/5 stars
Don’t forget to tune in tonight at midnight (ET) for Rob Daniels’ Visions In Sound, when he and I will be playing the brand-new Star Wars soundtrack composed by John Williams! Tune in locally on your FM dial to CKWR 98.5, or elsewhere, just click “listen live” via their website! The show runs from midnight to 2 am (ET). Coffee?
Tonight at midnight, you can again catch me LIVE on Robert Daniels‘ radio program VISIONS IN SOUND. Tune in locally on your FM dial to CKWR 98.5, or elsewhere, just click “listen live” via their website! The show runs from midnight to 2 am (ET). Coffee?
Tonight’s subject: STAR WARS: THE FORCE AWAKENS! The brand spanking new soundtrack by John Williams.
This will be our first time hearing it. Last week, Rob and I covered the music from the classic trilogy also composed by John Williams. We had an amazing time talking about the music, what it means to us as fans, and what it does for the films. Tonight will be interesting because I have no idea what the music sounds like! I am hoping to see The Force Awakens this morning or afternoon. One thing I mentioned to Rob last week (and I can’t even remember if this was on or off the air) was that this is the movie we have really been waiting for since 1983.
In ’83 when the credits rolled, all we really wanted to know was “what happens next?” Lucas had long teased us with the idea of three trilogies, but after Jedi it soon seemed unlikely that a sequel trilogy would ever happen. In 1983, we didn’t care about whatever happened Episodes I, II, or III. Many of us consider that to be backstory that would be better off left to the imagination. Kind of like reading the indices in a Tolkien book. We really wanted to see what happened next with Luke, Leia and Han. Would Luke become the most powerful Jedi ever? What new threats would emerge now that Vader and the Emperor were dead? And most interestingly, would Luke find and train new Jedi Knights, as Yoda instructed him? “Pass on what you have learned.”
That’s what we wanted to see. Then Lucas crapped out and said, “No more Star Wars. We’re done.”
By the time 1994 rolled around, his tune changed. It was Jurassic Park that did it. Lucas became enamoured with computers and said, “Now we have the technology to go and do Star Wars the way I always wanted to do it.” He began work, and as the prequels emerged from 1999-2005, Lucas often said “I only have ideas for six movies. That’s all there is. There are no sequels. The story is about Anakin Skywalker’s fall and redemption.” Yada, yada, yada….
I’ve always believed that George Lucas, much like his creation Han Solo, was just “making it up as he goes”. Although George did come up with story ideas for Star Wars Episode VII and beyond, what we will see today is a brand new creation. Lucas always said that if there were to be any sequels, they would be about Darth Vader’s grandchildren with Luke playing a mentoring role, like Obi-Wan Kenobi.
Today, we finally find out.
But tonight, I hope you’re able to tune in and catch what I assume and hope to be some incredible music. The Force Awakens will be the seventh Star Wars film composed by John Williams, and I am certain that it will be a treat. I’ve already reviewed all the classic trilogy soundtracks already, so if you need to catch up before the awakening, here they are:
GETTING MORE TALE #455: How to Make a Music Video (The Old-Fashioned Way)
In 1988-1989, a teenage LeBrain and his buddy Bob were very active in the school film program. We both took the highschool film course, and loved it. I remember writing an essay comparing the early and later films of Steven Speilberg, and scoring 98% or 99% on it. I just loved film and still do today, but Bob and I had our eyes on a different prize. We wanted to make a music video.
We both had guitars, and another kid in the film club named John had a camera. A kid from drama class named Dave offered to be the drummer. We didn’t have any drums (or even sticks), but that’s OK; Journey used the “no drums” thing as a gimmick in their video for “Separate Ways”. Taking that as inspiration, I got Dave to hit rocks and tables with chopsticks. We tried to access the drum kit in the school music room but it was booked. We could still do it, thanks to Journey. We could make an awesome music video!
It was our vision, so Bob and I got together one Saturday afternoon and spent several hours planning and doing rough storyboards.
The Charlie Awards were film awards for highschool kids, and Bob and I sought to enter our video that year. It was fall, and we began planning. The first thing we needed to do was pick a song. Wanting something upbeat that would allow us to run around a lot and make rock poses, we chose Poison’s “Nothin’ But A Good Time”. There was only one problem, which was that neither of us owned the album. So, I conned my dad out of the $10 to buy a copy at A&A Records & Tapes. I told him it was for a school project, which is true, but I didn’t tell him it was for a non-credit school project. Nor did I tell him the tape would then become part of my permanent music collection!
Bob and I plotted out what we needed to film. We wanted an intro similar to what Poison did in their very fun video (although this opening has since been edited out, probably due to “Rock and Roll All Nite” playing in the background of it). We got an English teacher, Mr. Payette, to help us out. In the school cafeteria, Bob’s character was sweeping the floor, playing air guitar and lip-synching to Van Halen’s “Jump”. Then Mr. Payette stormed in! “I pay you to clean the equipment, not play with it!” he yelled, nailing his part in just one take. Bob, not used to a nice guy like Mr. Payette yelling, was visibly having trouble keeping a straight face: but it worked! In the next shot, we utilized jump-cuts to have Bob’s leather jacket, sunglasses and guitar suddenly appear on him. And then the song began.
Since we had no idea how to make a music video and synch up the cassette audio afterwards, we had to figure it out as we went. We wound up shooting the “band” miming the video multiple times in many locations. Rockway Gardens in Kitchener was one such location. The school stage was another. We also did an incredible scene in a Geography class that was just terrific. We wanted a really angry looking teacher for that one, so we asked the Science teacher Mr. Marrow. He was a nice guy, but he sure could look mad when he needed to! For this shot, we taped a Samantha Fox swimsuit poster to one of the geography maps. Marrow pulled the map down, only to reveal Miss Fox! He then gave the camera a glare and stormed out. It was great. We filmed some guitar solos at the same time.
We spent a few months filming shots for the video, gathering scenes from different locations. We took some inspiration from the Beatles and had all of us rolling down a hill, jumping around on rocks, me doing several power slides…all kinds of rock and roll. Still winging it, we figured we would have more than enough great shots when it came time to editing.
We did not expect editing to be easy and it was not. Not in the least. At our disposal, we had a state of the art VHS editing suite. The school board owned it, and each high school got to keep it for a couple weeks a year. We had access to the suite in early ’89, around March. Bob and I stayed late at school every day for two weeks trying to get the video done by the deadline. We also had permission to skip a few classes. Still figuring things out as we went, we did not realize that the audio synch was a huge problem.
Bob pieced together the editing technique we would use. He chose a “master take” of us miming on the drummer Dave’s front lawn. This was a good master to use, because the audio was excellent. Bob was pumping the song through his car stereo, so we had a nice loud audio track to edit to. Then, when the video was done, we’d overdub the original song from the Poison cassette onto the video. Although it was hard work, the video pretty much edited itself. Bob and I both had plenty of shots we wanted to include, so it was just a matter of inserting them at the appropriate points. We had seen so many music videos over the years that cutting it was like second nature, once we figured out how to do it.
That’s when we ran into the audio synch issue.
Cut completed, we dubbed in the brand new clean audio direct from the Poison tape. By about halfway through the song, we started noticing problems. Even though every shot was perfectly synced in with the “master track”, the clean audio overdub was not. We struggled and struggled, trying to cue it up differently, and make it synch. We just couldn’t do it. By the end of the song, each line of the lyrics was off synch with our lips by at least one line. We called in the film teacher to help us. That’s when we learned something that we didn’t know about cassettes.
“Where is the original audio coming from on this video?” she asked. We explained that Bob had a great car deck, so we used that for our master take.
“That’s the problem then,” she said, telling us something we did not want to hear. “Car tape decks and regular cassette recorders often run at slightly different speeds,” she explained. “That’s why your audio is off. Either the car deck is playing the song fast, or this tape deck here is playing it slow, or both.”
There was nothing we could do with the technology at hand. We had no way to slightly speed up the cassette so it would match the video. And we were out of time on the editing suite. It had to go back, and if we couldn’t change the tape speed then we’d be stuck with a video we couldn’t synch up.
Using what little time we had left, we re-edited the end of the video slightly, to try and bring the words back into sync where they were the most glaring. We were able to fix some shots, but we were out of time and had to declare the project finished.
Bob and I attended the Charlie awards and saw some really amazing video work. In particular there was some clay animation that was brilliant, but there were also plenty of videos that were not nearly as good as ours. We got a special mention, but did not win a Charlie award, because of the audio synch. It was bittersweet, but Bob and I were both really proud of that video.
I still am, in fact! I have it on VHS, and it will always bring back great memories. I just wish we had a chance to do it again, right!
BRANT BJORK and the LOW DESERT PUNK BAND – Black Flower Power(2014 Napalm)
I’m a little pissed off that I didn’t get this album last year. If I had, it might have dramatically changed my Top 5 of 2014 list. Ever since I first grew to love Black Sabbath, I mourned that nobody (including Sabbath) were able to really capture the ingredients that made the early band special. Brant Bjork and the Low Desert Punk Band have grabbed onto some of that magic. Their bassist, Dave Dinsmore, is the most Geezer-ish bassist I have heard outside out Geezer Butler himself. The songwriting gravitates to those chunky kinds of riffs that Black Sabbath made their home. That’s not to say that Black Flower Power is a Sabbath clone — not at all — but it does have those elements, among many. You’ll hear me reference the Sabs more than once in this review.
‘Twas the good sir knight More Wood that introduced me to Brant Bjork, via Fu Manchu and Kyuss. Yet his solo work has reached and sometimes surpassed the heights of his former bands. I’ve never been disappointed with any of his projects, although Jalamanta was and remains a favourite. Black Flower Power has the potential to be that, too.
Over the course of eight tracks plus two bonus, the Low Desert Punk Band law down a variety of grooving rock. Bjork brings his diverse influences to the table, so you’ll hear latin influences sitting comfortably next to punk rock. Mostly, you will hear pure 1970’s rockin’ groovalicious smoke, and judging by the artwork, it’s the funky green smoke. “Feelin’ so high, so alive” sings Brant on “Boogie Woogie on Your Brain”, so we know where his head is at.
Bonus tracks are always interesting, because I say, hey! Why not just put more songs on the album if they’re good? “Hustler’s Blues” makes sense as a bonus track because it’s kind of outside the general direction of the album. It has laid-back aspects that are more Black Flower Power meets Jalamanta. Brilliant jam, though, especially as it accelerates towards the end. The second bonus track is “Where You From, Man?”, a title taken from the lyrics to “We Don’t Serve Their Kind”. The songs are unrelated, though. “We Don’t Serve Their Kind” is a driving metallic sludge with a chorus that will assassinate your brain; “Where You From, Man?” is a jammy instrumental that meanders around with, what sounds like, samples quotes from James T. Kirk?! (Wonder where he got that idea?) It’s also one of the most Sabbathy, in terms of the early jazzy jamming Sabbath.
No matter your musical persuasion, it’s hard to deny the genius contained herein. If you’re attracted to playing, there’s that. Experimentation, yup, just listen to the guitar noise manipulation that passes for a solo in “Where You From, Man?” Melody is here, in aggressive rock form. Folks, this is quality shit.
Highly recommended, especially to fans of Queens of the Stone Age, Kyuss, Fu Manchu, and the mighty Sabbath.
My first purchase from Mike and Aaron Go to Toronto Again…Again to be reviewed. Bought at BMV on Bloor for $5.99 in excellent shape.
A few years ago I picked up the pretty damn fine Styx 2 CD compilation Come Sail Away. Since that time I pledged to pick up old Styx studio albums on CD, if found used or cheap. Equinox is now the oldest found I’ve acquired. After recording four albums for Wooden Nickel records, Styx finally signed with a major label. A&M released their fifth: Equinox. It was however also their last album with original guitarist John Curulewski, a major songwriting contributor to the early albums. The Styx story continued with them moving from strength to strength and discovering a kid named Tommy Shaw out of Alabama. Shaw picked up the ball and helped Styx finish their touring commitments for Equinox.
When I was younger and not really paying attention to the lyrics, I assumed “Light Up” meant something about stage lights, perhaps lighting up the stage for a show. As an adult, I am convinced that Styx were actually corrupting the youth! Opening the album with a progressive salvo of heavy guitars and spacey keys, it quickly transitions into a celebration. “Light up and be happy, sweet sweet sounds will fill the air,” sings Dennis De Young innocently enough. Dennis seems to imply he’s singing about a sipping a glass of wine, but then: “All I need is just one hit to get me by, ‘Cause baby when you’re near I’m halfway high.” I see what you’re saying, Dennis, you rascal. A great happy-go-lucky tune, “Light Up” is just fun. But then “Lorelei” turns up the rock. This time Dennis is corrupting America by inviting a woman to live with him, pre-marriage I assume! “Lorelei let’s live together!” John Curulewski and James Young bring with them a hint of a southern rock twang in the leads (think the Eagles). Dense, immaculately arranged and lush, “Lorelei” is pure classic rock fun. On the progressive side, Dennis’ synth and organs take center stage on “Mother Dear”, a co-write with Curulewski who punctuates it with heavy chords. Fans of space rock will love this trippy journey into the sonic spectrum. “Lonely Child” starts as an acoustic number, heavying-up as it goes. Twangy space guitars are the highlight. These four songs together are a great side, a good balance between the cerebral and the hard.
I still like to think of classic albums in terms of sides, so this is where I got up to make some fresh coffee. Good thing too, because “Midnight Ride” could not be more different. It’s clearly a James Young song, a pure rock blaze through the night going over the speed limit. Put the caffeine right into my veins, man, this is groovy shit and Styx can rock you harder than you expect. Dennis’ role is limited to backing vocals, albeit stunning ones!
“Born For Adventure” combines the different sides of Styx. You get the rocking guitars and the progressive bent, with the pompous arrangement and smoking musicianship. Then, Curulewski is solely responsible for “Prelude 12”, the acoustic part that introduces the album closing epic, “Suite Madame Blue”. Six and a half minutes of bombastic Styx will drive almost every punk rocker out of the room. In many regards, this is a high water mark. It’s their “Stairway”. Their “Hotel California”. It lacks nothing and continues to impress, 40 years later!
John Curulewski died in 1988, of a brain aneurysm. After Equinox, he decided to step out of the spotlight and ran a recording studio while playing with several local Chicago bands. Shaw took his place and the band has never looked back, but we’ll dedicate this review to John Curulewski who was a crucial part the Styx story.
Tonight at midnight, you can catch me LIVE on Robert Daniels’ radio program VISIONS IN SOUND. Tune in locally on your FM dial to CKWR 98.5, or even easier, just click “listen live” via their website! The show runs from midnight to 2 am (ET). Needless to say I’ll be fueling myself up on coffee.
The subject: STAR WARS! The soundtracks specifically. Last week, Rob covered the music from the prequel trilogy composed by John Williams. Tonight is the original classic trilogy, also composed by Williams, so you don’t want to miss this. And if you do, it should be available online for streaming later on. Rob and I have been excitedly discussing the upcoming film The Force Awakens (only a week away!) and I can’t think of a better way to get ready.
I hope you’re able to tune in and catch some incredible music. I’ve reviewed all the classic trilogy soundtracks already, and you know you’ll be in for a treat.
WTF Search Terms XXIX: Joey Tempest’s Real Hair edition
Good day, eh? Welcome to the latest edition of WTF Search Terms: those whacky things people type into a search engine that somehow lead them here! I find that certain topics go in waves. For example, a popular question often searched for is “Can Marilyn Manson suck his own dick?” (Answer: No.) These things come and go like trends. Nobody will search for Manson’s dick for months, and then suddenly in one week, I’m getting multiple hits for Manson’s wang using different phrasing. Of course, that could still just be one person, trying and clicking in vain that it will be a different site this time….
Lately, Joakim Larsson, better known as Joey Tempest, the lead singer (or not?) of Europe, has popped up in search terms, and in the comments! Remember a few months back, when we were visited by Joey’s supposed spouse, Miranda Larsson? This time, in fact, Joakim himself stopped by to say hello:
Woah!
Before you start kneeling and cawing “We’re not worthy, we’re not worthy!”, let’s have a closer look. Joey apparently uses a Yahoo email address, and according to the IP address, lives in Virginia. His IP address is also an exact match with a previous comment left by “Miranda Larsson”, also living in Virginia. But wait…according to Wikipedia and its source material, “Joey Tempest currently lives in London with his wife Lisa Worthington and sons James Joakim and Jack Johnston Larsson. He does not have any social media pages apart from the official ones for Europe listed on their website.”
Conclusion: Sadly, I do not think the real Joey Tempest has ever had the fortune to stop by here at mikeladano.com. I guess I’ll have to remain content with a bitchy Kenny Hotz comment from a couple years ago.
These recent comments came with a spate of WTF search terms! Seems I’m not the only one wondering about Miranda and Joey and…well…and just see for yourself. Enjoy these Joey (and one for bandmate John Norum) WTFs!
GETTING MORE TALE #453: What is Your Front-Person Style?
There are two types of people in this world: those that can make music, and those that cannot.
After many years of trying, I have to admit it, that I fall into the latter category. I can’t make music. I tried. I can make some noise and scream, but you wouldn’t pay money to see me in concert. Instead I’ve focused my energy on two things: writing about music, and playing air-music.
Air guitar (and to a lesser degree, air bass) is timeless, and I’ll wager that anyone with arms has done it.
Harder to fake, but much more rewarding due to the physical exertion, is a good air drum session. It’s easy to fake an air guitar mistake, but it’s harder to cover up when you’re on air drums.
It’s arguable that even more popular than these activities is lip-syncing to your tunes. But why stop there? After all, singing the song is only part of a vocalist’s job. The other part is entertaining the crowd, otherwise known as fronting the band. Think about it: Is Ozzy Osbourne successful because of his singing, or is it the fact that he is generally listed as one of the top most entertaining frontmen in rock? Same with W. Axl Rose. Part of the allure of Guns N’ Roses is seeing what kind of mood Axl will be in that night. What will he say? What will he do?
I’ll admit that when I’m alone in the house, blasting the tunes, it’s fun to play frontman and pretend I’m in charge of the best air band of all time. It’s even more fun to do this in the back yard; that’s just an “FYI” for those brave enough. While I’ve never consciously set out to copy a singer, I’ve noticed that my personal style as “air frontman” has been influenced by many of the greats, Mr. Rose included.
Once Guns N’ Roses hit the big time for real, they were touring massive stadiums, indoor and out. Their stage was phenomenally huge, and Axl would run from one side all the way to the other, usually while trying to sing! Duff, he’d just walk it. Not Axl. Many of these stage runs would end with him jumping off a riser. Not to be outdone in this regard is Brian Vollmer from Helix. Starting from their club daze, he used to somersault from the stage onto tables. When I saw him in Kitchener in ’87, during one song he climbed up onto the mezzanines, ran across the entire balcony, and then climbed back down the other side of the stage. I’ve seen Helix a hella-lot, and Vollmer still has no problem jumping on tables. He’s an awesome machine of a frontman, and he taught me that there are no boundaries between audience and band. Looking up to guys like these, when I have the space, as air frontman I like to run and jump too! I can’t do it like I used to in my teens, but I still do it.
Another frontman that heavily influenced my personal style was Paul Stanley of Kiss. Sometimes, depending on the song, it just feels right to play air rhythm guitar too. When performing to a song that felt this way, Paul Stanley became my model. Nobody can dance with a guitar like Paul. Much like Axl, Paul (especially in the 80’s when he wasn’t wearing platforms) was known to run and jump all over the stage. I will sometimes catch myself doing a specific spin that I saw Paul do in the “Thrills in the Night” video.
When not wielding my air-axe, I tend to need something to do with my hands! Who was the master of fronting a band with his hands and voice alone? Why, that would have to be Ronnie James Dio himself. I don’t tend to go for clichés like the devil horns; I make up my own gestures. However there is no denying that Ronnie James Dio is my number one air frontman inspiration when it comes to my hands. There are none better than Dio. There never will be.
These four guys undoubtedly had the most impact on me as an air frontman, but there is one more who cannot be ignored, and that is Mike Patton. My buddy Peter recorded a Faith No More performance from Saturday Night Live, and Patton was climbing up the scaffolding. I’d never seen a weirder performer in a rock band. What a bizarre, yet cool, image. So, if the song called for it, I’d throw in some Patton weirdness. Lurching across the stage, or flailing wildly, or even just standing stock-still, Mike Patton taught me a few extra bonus moves for my bag of tricks.
I don’t know how to dance. I have no dance moves whatsoever. I’m the Seth Rogen of dancing. All I have is the “dice thing”; that’s all I got. But when it comes to rocking the house as the best damn air singer around, I’ll take on all comers!
BRANT BJORK and the LOW DESERT PUNK BAND – Black Flower Power (2014 Napalm)
STYX – Equinox (1975 A&M)
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