This review comes by request of, well, several readers. Done With Mirrors was Aerosmith’s first record on their new deal with Geffen. That means it wasn’t included in the massive 13 disc Box of Fire that I reviewed recently. I intended to get around to Done With Mirrors anyway, but the reader anticipation adds an interesting sort of pressure.
I know some people hold this album in high esteem. “36 minutes of classic Aerorock,” said one reader. I know that Done With Mirrors is a bit of a cult favourite album in some ways. The band ignore all but one song in their live sets, but some fans have loved it since it came out. I think it’s possible that some readers, knowing my love for underdog albums, are hoping I’m going to come out with some really appreciative glowing observations about the album.
The fact of the matter is, I’ve never been a fan of this album. “Let the Music Do the Talking” is probably my second favourite Aero-tune ever, right after “Chip Away the Stone”. As an album, I have always found Done With Mirrors to be so-so at best, and I’ve never really warmed up to it over the years. Why is that?
I decided to do something different for this review, and listen to the album as background music while working on something else. I came away with some strong impressions, so I immediately gave it another listen. Rather than go song-by-song, I’d rather just talk about the feeling I get from the album now.
I used to think the production (by Ted Templeman) sucked. I think it could use some embellishment, but hot damn! Aren’t Joey’s drums sounding fucking awesome? Yes they are. I’d say Joey’s the MVP on Done With Mirrors, as he is so rock solid consistent right through!
I used to think the songs (all but “Let the Music Do the Talking”) were pretty much just crap. I think anyone would have to admit that these are not the catchiest tunes Aerosmith have ever written in their storied career. They do, however, rock. They rock hard. “My Fist Your Face” is exactly what it sounds like — a fist right in your face!
I used to think that Steve and the band sounded tired compared to the earlier material, or what came after. I still think that’s true, but even tired, Aerosmith were capable of blowing out the speakers with bluesy riffs and Steve’s scats. If you pay attention to the lyrics, you’ll hear that Steve’s as sassy as ever. I love the name-dropping of “Joe Perry, oooh Mr. Style.”
Compared to, say, Pump, Done With Mirrors doesn’t fare too well. Letting it stand on its own and just enjoying it as a batch of rockers, it’s actually not as bad as I remembered. Maybe all these years I just haven’t been letting it in.
Big surprise: How swampy and cool “She’s On Fire” is. No idea why it never clicked with me before. I can say the same for a few songs on this album. While very few would make my own personal road tapes, there aren’t any to skip. It’s a fair chunk of solid, hard rocking Aerosmith. No ballads, no fluff, no embarrassing forays into other genres.
Finally, gotta love the cover art and double meaning. I’ve always been fond of the packaging way before hearing the album.
What happened to the good ship King Kobra? Hilarious misspelled name, silly coordinated hair colours (all but veteran drummer Carmine Appice, who complimented their red and blonde with his red and black), and production by the guy who brought you Quiet Riot — what could possibly go wrong? They even had their own “kobra” signature hand gesture, and weird complementary stage moves in an expensive music video.
When you have lyrics like, “I’m ready to strike, I’m cocked and loaded tonight,” but you’re not David Lee Roth or Gene Simmons, you’re already fighting an uphill battle. Carmine saw the sudden success of bands like Quiet Riot, and decided “why the hell not”? He picked up some great players for this project. Bassist Johnny Rod ended up in W.A.S.P. later on. David Michael-Phillips played with Lizzy Borden after Kobra. Mick Sweda formed BulletBoys. Mark Free formed Unruly Child, and ultimately became Marcie Free. She still fronts Unruly Child today. Meanwhile Carmine Appice reformed this lineup of King Kobra, substituting in Paul Shortino for Free, and getting good reviews for it.
So talent aside, there’s no worries there. There are two major issues with this record. One: the muddy Spencer Proffer production which lays a muffly blanket over the band. All but Appice of course, who bears a very Frankie Banali-like sound on this album. The guitars are empty transistor radio renditions of what guitars should sound like. Two: filler material kept Ready To Strike from fulfilling its potential.
It’s not all filler of course — much of it is damn good. The first three tracks in a row (“Ready to Strike”, “Hunger”, and “Shadow Rider”) are all really good, actually. Famously, “Hunger” became a minor hit, although it was actually written by Canada’s Kick Axe, and recorded by them under the name Spectre General, for Transformers: The Movie in 1986! I prefer the King Kobra version, because Mark Free really nailed that vocal.
Other decent tunes include “Shake Up”…I mean, it’s OK. It has a good pre-chorus, “And the beat goes on and on and on…”, but the lines about home work and yard work were pretty goofy even back then. Like that one, “Tough Guys” is also a good tune (mid-tempo mellow rocker) sunk by a bad lyric. “The world’s greatest lie, is that all of us tough guys don’t cry.” No thanks, not cranking that one with the windows down.
Crummy tunes: “Attention”, “Piece of the Rock”, “Breakin’ Out” and “Dancing With Desire”. Stinky. I can’t decide how I feel about the overwrought “Second Thoughts”.
Overall: Middle of the road album that neither astounds nor repulses. It has enough good tunes to warrant a place in my collection. How about you?
For Tommy Morais’ excellent 4/5 star review of this album,click here, and to skip directly to the comment that started it all,click here!
GUEST REVIEW by academic and rock fan “Jesse A. Jones”*
EUROPE – War of Kings (2015 UDR)
The Swedish rock band Europe stormed onto the charts in the mid 1980’s with uplifting keyboard oriented pop rock, written by singer and founder Joey Tempest, a golden fluffy-haired gifted soul. Then their slide down the charts began. Albums like Out of This World sold fewer and fewer copies and the band finally broke up in the early 90’s, amid rumours that even their own mothers now preferred The Hives.
Unfortunately for fans and the band, these would be the last great albums Europe would make! The fact that mainstream rock magazines still praise Europe is shocking nonsense. It’s hard to believe anyone buys that stupidity! There has not been a real “Europe” in 26 years! It’s a conspiracy involving many producers, record label execs, musicians, writers, FIFA and the worldwide media cartel as a whole. The Bilberbergers know but say nothing, while the Rothschilds remain silent. I have proof written on the back of a beer mat that in 1994 Matt Groening was forced to rewrite a Futurama episode that obliquely referenced the scandal. Shadowy elements of the secret world government have stifled independent thought and critical opinions, ensuring we will all remain unquestioning and loyal, to both our governments and rock bands alike!
Well, ladies and gentlemen it is my sworn duty to tell you the truth and I will not be silenced, or my integrity bought for 30 pieces of record company silver!
The problem is the Europe of today has nothing in common with the real group Europe that topped the charts in 1987. Literally. Committing a conspiracy of great scale, they have been secretly and knowingly touring with an imposter singer since 1989! Their last horrible and fake albums (lifeless and without soul) were not written by the real Joey Tempest. Without Joey’s talent and unique abilities, the band is a lost joke; twisted and sad – imagine, it would be like Deep Purple without Nick Simper – just unthinkable!
The truth remains shrouded in mystery. The only details now known, thanks to a covert informant “C.A.”, is that the imposter Joey forced out the real Joey sometime in 1989, using a complex web of lies and half-truths. Plastic surgeons and vocal coaches helped the fake Joey in his goals, and were paid off for their silence, or disappeared. Some say that the real reason that the late celebrity plastic surgeon Dr. Fredric Brandt suffered from depression was keeping this whole thing secret. Then, having successfully replaced Joey without anyone noticing, Europe continued to tour with a new voice and face fronting the band, raking in millions. It is quite remarkable that very few fans have noticed this imposter. “Joey’s” voice changed on 1991’s Prisoner’s in Paradise album but the complicit media have either ignorantly or purposely covered it up. Fans have wondered why Joey’s hair style and hair colour changed on that album, assuming it was just a superficial change. Little did they know that the head and face behind the hair had also changed! Joey would NEVER let his hair go flat like that! Wake up people!
Europe with the imposter have made a semi-successful go of it, edging themselves towards world domination, even placing third in Sweden’s Got Talent in 2013, but for an unknown, sinister purpose. True fans, distinguishable from the herd by their password ‘Cherokee – marching on the trail of tears’, who know and appreciate the talents of the real Joey, have wondered what happened, but no-one listens. As for the fake fans, how could YOU do this to the real Joey? How could YOU not even notice this shadow of a Joey up there on stage singing fake odes to “Carrie”? Shame on the fans, and most of all shame on the band for not stopping this charade 26 years ago!
Just look at the songs here! “Children of the Night”. The real Joey would never have written a song about “children of the night”, “California 405” is the highway that O.J. Simpson was chased down – a definite clue that there was something more going on here than meets the eye! Why would Europe specifically reference that notorious highway unless they were implying some sort of wrongdoing behind the scenes?
Just listen to the song “Praise You” on this album. As if the real Joey would have written “Praise You”! This rude, obscene imposter has terrible lyrics and evil facial expressions. He is a demonic devil from hell who only cares for himself, not the fans and certainly not the spirit of the original Joey – with the voice, face and hair of an angel. The real Joey gave the fans everything he had. His reward was being ousted by an imposter who now receives all the love and praise from ignorant and deceived “fans” who are too stupid to notice the difference. His only goal in this world is to lie and fool as many fans as possible while he laughs raking in the money! No talent, no soul, no voice! That’s the fake Joey right there. Just listen to War Of Kings, it’s as if he and the whole band are actively setting out to destroy the affection of the fans and ruin the legacy of the band as a whole. Well I won’t sit idly by and let this happen! No sir!
Some will say, “Well you are wrong. His hair and voice change with style and age.” No. Look at his eyes. They are not the same eyes, you can see the yawning chasms of hellfire deep in those pupils. Joey tried to warn you what was happening. Read the lyrics to “Stranger on the Track”! Make sense now? Joey was warning you that “danger” was on his back and nobody listened. Joey stood for love and the truth! Long live love! Long live the truth! One day Joey will return and prove this all to be true, with the original angelic voice of Europe!
It is hard though to bear this burden, sometimes even I start to doubt, but then I only have to look down at the words tattooed on my thigh; words of inspiration, words of power, the real Joey’s words and I find the strength to go on, in his name.
Rock now, rock the night
‘Til early in the morning light
Rock now, rock the night
You’d better believe it’s right.
No rating
* Professor Emeritus of Applied Conspiracy at the University of Punkeydoodles Corners and author of ‘Paul Is Dead: The Amazing Beatles Conspiracy’, ‘Lennon Lives! Why John Isn’t Dead’ and ‘George! Satan’s Favorite Beatle’.
Part 3 of 3 in this week’s Helix miniseries. The original review was posted in August 2012, but this is completely new and improved!
HELIX – No Rest For the Wicked (1983 EMI)
Finally! The big break came, after nearly 10 years of hard work. The trick was re-branding Helix as a “metal band” instead of a plain old bar rock band. An early video for “Heavy Metal Love” was filmed in T-shirts and jeans. It was only after they switched to leather clothing and a more “metal” image, did people start to take notice. “Heavy Metal Love” was re-filmed for a more metallic music video, and Helix were more or less off to the races. They had a boost from CanCon rules, which meant the video went into rotation on MuchMusic.
“Heavy Metal Love”, written in a crummy hotel room in Seaforth Ontario, is an ode to Joan Jett; or rather a fantasy about Joan Jett. It remains as fun now as it was then. Helix re-recorded the tune in 2006 for their Get Up EP, but it is this version produced by Tom Treumuth that has become timeless. Indeed, it was chosen for the wedding scene in theTrailer Park Boys movie that same year. It’s still a great groove, and a whole lot of fun.
“Fun” is a great word to describe Helix’s music in general, and No Rest For the Wicked is perhaps their strongest effort, at least from their years on Capitol Records. It is true that I gave Breaking Loose (1979) high praise and a 5/5 star rating, but No Rest is easier to sink your teeth into on just one listen.
Helix in 1983 consisted of:
Brian Vollmer – lead vocals
Brent “the Doctor” Doerner – guitar
Paul Hackman – guitar
Mike Uzelac – bass
Greg “Fritz” Hinz – drums
The only lineup change this time was the drum seat. Leo Niebudek departed, and was replaced by Fritz Hinz, ex-Starchild. (Starchild’s claim to history is an early single produced by some unknown guy named Daniel Lanois. Fritz played on their later, uber-rare Children of the Stars album.) With Hinz, the band had acquired an easy-to-love showman who had the chops required. I shall never forget the sight of Fritz’s buttless chaps, giving us the moon at a 1987 concert.
Even though I hold Breaking Loose in very high esteem, No Rest For the Wicked is probably just as good, but in a different way. The new heavier direction didn’t alienate their old fans, but it did gain them plenty of new ones. It seemed a lot of kids on my street had a copy of this LP or cassette. It’s more than just the one song — every track is great, every single one of ’em. The title track still serves as Helix’ show opener. Live, they change part of the lyrics to “Ain’t no rest for the Helix band!” It’s true! It’s an unrelenting and cool metal assault. But again…plenty fun.
Need some party rock? Look no further than “Let’s All Do It Tonight”. Listen to that one, and then try to forget the chorus! If you like that kind of melodic hard rock, then you’ll probably also dig “Don’t Get Mad Get Even”, the second (much less seen) video made for the album.
Need some sleeze? Then “Check Out the Love”, before you do the “Dirty Dog”. Both songs are killer grooves. “Dirty Dog” never fails to make the setlists today. It is suspended by a killer riff and Vollmer’s shredded vocal cords. And let’s not forget “White Lace and Black Leather”. (Like they did with the track “Breaking Loose”, Helix put the title song on the next album!) This is about as dirty as they get, and I love it.
Need a ballad? Naw, didn’t think so. But just in case, Helix put on a ballsy one, in “Never Want To Lose You”. Sounds wimpy, yes, but it has the guitars and heavy chorus necessary to keep you from losing your cool.
Need a boost of adrenaline? Then the doctor prescribes “Ain’t No High Like Rock ‘N’ Roll”. Kicking up the pace a few notches, it still retains that Helix knack for melody.
Also recommended, chase this with the live album called Live In Buffalo, which was recorded for radio shortly afterwards. It has high-octane live versions of most of these tracks as well as a sneak preview of the next album, Walkin’ the Razor’s Edge.
I think this one sounds particularly good on vinyl. Gimme an R!
Having already done it once themselves, why not do it again? Once again Helix with manager Bill Seip raised the funds to record an independent album. Drummer Brian Doerner was gone, replaced by Leo Niebudek. On bass, Keith “Bert” Zurbrigg hung around long enough to record one new song (“It’s Too Late”). He was replaced by the young, talented and troubled Mike Uzelac. He was only 17 when he first joined Helix. He told them he was 19.
Sticking to the same formula as Breaking Loose, there is really no deviation in sound. Some members have changed but little else. The band still managed to come up with enough good material to fill an album to follow the first. I don’t know if the track “Breaking Loose” was a leftover from the first album or not, but quality-wise there is nothing “leftover” about it. I would call it a typical Helix party rocker: a fast one, often used back in the day to open their sets. The lyrics are the kind of thing that Helix were about: the weekend!
“4 O’clock Friday afternoon, Punch that time clock, now you’ll be home soon, Your week’s all done, now it’s time to roll, You’re like a time bomb about to explode.”
Vollmer reminds us “You only got two days, so make it last,” a philosophy I heartily agree with. Brent Doerner and Paul Hackman lay down a pair of ripping guitar solos for the icing on the cake. Then “It’s Too Late” is the kind of melodic mid-tempo rocker that their first album was loaded with. Surely something like “It’s Too Late” could have worked on the radio, and I think that was the intent. That takes away nothing from the song, which is classy with quality.
“Long Distance Heartbreak” at almost seven minutes is Helix’s longest song ever. In the early days they tended to experiment with their songwriting, coming up with the odd mini-epic. Like many Helix classics, this one reads as a road song. Thin Lizzy they were not, but Vollmer captures the heartbreak in their lyrics while Doerner and Hackman take care of the guitar drama.
Helix get even more serious for a moment with “Time For a Change”, and “Hangman’s Tree” also brings a few issues to the table. “Time For a Change” is sadly even more valid today.
“Everyday there’s a new headline, Another war and another lie, When will we learn to stop this killing while we can?”
It’s interesting that Helix didn’t seem to know their direction yet, but still infused every song with their bare honesty. They were riding a line between a party band and a more serious, more experimental rock band. In the end they chose the route that they were intended for, but that takes nothing away from these early songs. “Time For a Change” and “Hangman’s Tree” are unexpectedly ambitious for a young bar band from Canada. In each case, it is the guitar work that elevates the songs.
“It’s What I Wanted” lightens the mood, a mid-tempo rocker with a great melody. I don’t know why it is, but these melodic rock songs really sound like home to me. They conjure images of a more innocent time, when the world seemed smaller to me. They capture and bring back hazy, happy pictures of Kitchener in the late 70’s.
Brent Doener comes back with his only lead vocal on the track “Mainline”. Sounds like Brent was having no trouble getting satisfaction back then. “She keeps me happy, what can I say?” he sings, lamenting that his lady keeps him up all night and late for work in the morning! “Pick up my cheque at the end of the day, I find I’m down a couple hours’ pay.” So in essence, “Mainline” is about choices. You can either have tons and tons of sex at all hours of the day, or get to work on time. It’s your choice, people!
“Women, Whiskey & Sin” is pretty simple in its message. This smoking track is more like Helix would evolve on later albums like No Rest For the Wicked. “Ain’t no laws to hold us back on a Saturday night,” sings Brian Vollmer. (Hate to tell ya Brian, there actually are laws about some of the things you boys were doing back in the day!) Then “Thoughts That Bleed” is a proggy, slow closer with lots of dynamics, similar to how Helix ended the first album with “Wish I Could Be There”.
Ultimately there is no question that Helix made the right move to drop some of these softer, more progressive moments and focus on the heavy metal side of their sound. It got them signed to Capitol Records and secured their biggest hits. That leaves these first two albums as evidence of an earlier, more naive Helix willing to stretch out a bit more.
Long before they gave you an ‘R’, Helix earned a reputation as the hardest working band in Canada, year after year in the cold dirty clubs of the Great White North. Formed in 1974, Helix had a number of lineup changes before they even recorded their debut. If you want to get technical about it, even on their first album, Helix only had two remaining original members in singer Brian Vollmer and bassist Keith “Bert” Zurbrigg. Helix really solidified when they eventually acquired guitarist Paul Hackman, and twin brothers Brent (guitar) and Brian Doerner (drums).
Manager Bill Seip, who eventually guided Helix to a major label deal with Capitol Records in the early 80’s, was an early believer. Under his leadership, they managed to scrape together enough cash to record an independent album — something very few bands did back then. They released it on their own “H&S Records”, for Helix & Seip. What is remarkable about the album they created, Breaking Loose, is how great it still is today. I know people, very respected in the local rock community, who will tell you this is Helix’s best album.
Breaking Loose isn’t metal, but what it lacks in firepower is made up for in class, ambition and natural talent. Brian Doerner is one of the most respected drummers around, having acquired an extensive discography over the decades. As for Brent Doener and Paul Hackman, together they forged a guitar partnership that would take them up to the big leagues. They are not Downing & Tipton, nor are they Smith & Murray. Doerner & Hackman (R.I.P.) were in a hard rocking bar band, and Helix were damn good for their demographic. What they brought to the table was ability, but not flash. Both were capable of writing songs on their own, as the writing credits on Breaking Loose attest to.
Having toured extensively, Helix worked up a number of originals. The entire album is written by the trio of Doerner, Hackman and Vollmer, in various permutations. Even then, Brian Vollmer had a remarkable voice: power with just a tiny bit of grit, but also the ability to sing clean. The production on the album is flat by today’s standards, but perspective and context are everything. For a self-financed album in 1979, it sounds incredible! Though it lacks the oomph of Helix today, it’s perfectly listenable.
Starting with the mid-tempo “I Could Never Leave”, Helix right away hit you right off the bat with one of their catchiest tunes. You’ll notice the nice backing vocals, Brent being particularly audible. “Don’t Hide Your Love” has a similar vibe, that being hard rock with an emphasis on catchy melodies. Maybe Helix were aiming for the radio, but the songs aren’t wimpy by any stretch.
“Down in the City” is a Vollmer ballad, and a pretty good one too. The lyrics are cringe-worthy, but the music had ambition. It starts as a pretty, folky acoustic song and eventually builds with more guitars into something different. Plenty of guitars to go around. Then like night and day it’s onto “Crazy Women”, written and vocalized by Brent, otherwise known as “The Doctor”. Doerner has a quirkier writing style, which is a good thing, because it helped Helix stand out a little more from the pack. “Crazy Women” has plenty of guitars of course, but also has a neat drunken stumble to it.
Brent closed side one, and opened side two with a legendary song that helped them get a following on the west coast: “Billy Oxygen”. It’s still a favourite to this day, a short fast rocker about a guy named Billy Oxygen, captain of a starship called an ES-335, looking to meet some aliens to party with. Out of this world? Wait until you hear the band playing the shit out of it! Brian’s drumming reminds me of a good jazz drummer — fast, accurate, and hard! Keith Zurbrigg throws down a little bass, playing off with Brent and Paul in a three-way solo for the ages.
If you don’t like “Billy Oxygen”, then I’m not sure if we can be friends. The impact this song had on me cannot really be measured, as I played it on repeat ad-nauseum. As I recounted in Record Store Tales Part 2 (!), this tune even inspired me to do some writing of my own:
When I was in University I tried my hand at bad, bad science fiction short stories. Suffice to say, none of it survives today with good reason. However, Helix had a little moment in my fiction: My spaceship was called an ES-335, named after Billy Oxygen’s ship in the song. And only a little while ago did I learn that ES-335 wasn’t the name of a spaceship at all. An ES-335 was a Gibson guitar.
“Here I Go Again” is not the Whitesnake song, but another one of those melodic rock songs that seemed a bit contrived to get some radio play. That’s just speculation on my part, but I’m glad it was “Billy Oxygen” that did get the airplay. That’s not to say anything negative about the fine “Here I Go Again”. There isn’t a weak song on this album, but two other highlights are definitely “You’re A Woman Now”, featuring female backing vocals and a structure that builds into something dramatic, as if it’s Helix’s own “Stairway To Heaven”. “Wish I Could Be There” brings back the outer space theme, and has acoustic and heavy sections, sort of Helix’s foray into prog rock.
I should note that both “Wish I Could Be There” and “Billy Oxygen” made the Sausagefest countdown a few years ago, a lofty achievement indeed. “Billy” even cracked the top five. Musical scholar Scotty Geffros holds both songs in high esteem, and voted for them accordingly, as did I. Our host, Iron Tom Sharpe also voted for “Billy”.
This lineup only lasted for one album, both Brian Doerner and Keith Zurbrigg departed shortly after this, leaving Vollmer the sole original member. Their legacy of the lineup is this debut album, something any band would be proud of. Unfortunately, CDs are hard to find. Capitol did a bare-bones but fine CD reissue in 1992, with both Breaking Loose and the second album White Lace & Black Leather, on one disc. That release was called The Early Years, but it went out of print many years ago. Brian Vollmer did a CD reissue of each individually, but both are now sold out.
Now, fair warning: I have to disclose that I am biased when it comes to this band. I’ve met them a number of times, and I have the phone numbers of two guys who played on this album. For another perspective, I asked Scotty Geffros, who has a Masters degree in Rockology, about his relationship with Breaking Loose:
After being handed this album, as a youngster of maybe 9 or 10, I remember examining the cover first…and seeing the photos of the band on the back, and wondering why the singer had a Blackhawks jersey on? I was told by my father to listen to “Billy Oxygen” and quickly went to the turntable to give it a spin. Low and behold, instant love. From catchy tunes like “Here I Go Again”, to more epic works like “Wish I Could Be There”, this album grabbed me and holds up today as a really good, albeit under-appreciated record.
[Note: I was wondering the same thing. Brian, why are you wearing a Blackhawks jersey?]
I’d go a step further than Scott and call it really great. Being completely honest though, the only complaint I have about this album would be that some of the lyrics were a little weak. Young band…first album…I’ll forgive them. If you can too, then I suggest you hear Breaking Loose at your earliest convenience.
Rest in peace, Christopher Lee — one of my favourite actors. Please check outSean Munger’s excellent tributeto this fine performer. Weirdly enough, he had a heavy metal career too. Check Sean’s site for the scoop.
THE WICKER MAN (1973, Anchor Bay numbered box)
Directed by Robin Hardy
Please, whatever you do — do not see the Nicholas Cage “remake” (I use that term loosely) of The Wicker Man. Do not waste your time. See this version, the classic Christopher Lee/Edward Woodward original.
Police Sgt. Howie (a young Woodward) receives a tip about a missing girl on Summerisle, a fictitious island in the north of Scotland. He takes a seaplane to the island where he is greeted very cooly by the locals. Strangely, none of the elders claim to know of the girl, Rowan Morrison. Howie is not dissuaded and refuses to leave. He sets up in a local hotel to learn more about the island and the girl.
Nothing adds up, as he finds her desk at the school and her name in the school registers, proof that the girl did exist. Howie, a devout Christian, is horrified to find that there are no Christians on Summerisle — only Pagans. Their rituals are strange and disgusting to him, and the local church is rundown and obviously unused for quite some time. The things he witnesses on Summerisle are some of the most interesting images in the film, qualifying it a work of true art, and impossible for serious cinema fans to ignore.
Howie finds the grave of Rowan Morrison and wishes to exhume the body, but to do that he needs permission from the owner of the island, Lord Summerisle (Lee). Lee’s presence in this film is magnificent. Some consider this to be the best work of his career. As Lord Summerisle, he is regal, mysterious and dignified. But is he guilty of obstructing justice, or even accessory to murder? What is the secret history of Summerisle, which has suffered failed crops in the recent past? Who sent Howie the tip about the missing girl, and why?
Disturbingly and suddenly, Howie’s seaplane will not start and he cannot return to the mainland. As the plot slowly begins to unfold, and stranger and stranger things are witnessed upon the island, Howie comes to believe that young Rowan is not dead, but soon will be if he does not act. He aims to stop her sacrifice, and comes face to face with the wicker man himself. (If you don’t know what a wicker man is, look it up.) By the end of the movie, you will be haunted by the song “The Lord is My Shepherd” and the words, “Oh Jesus Christ!”
Movie card included in the box set
The horror in this movie is not gore, or monsters, or traditional horror frights. It lies in the situations that Howie gets himself into, by refusing to leave. The film is not for everybody. I know some people who watch it regularly, and others (like my dad) who have found it so chilling that they will never watch it again. Check it out cautiously. Only then will you know if you have the fortitude to face The Wicker Man!
This DVD edition by Anchor Bay is excellent. Two cuts of the film are included. The extended cut features some of the once-lost footage that enhances the experience. The extended version is the version to watch. There is also documentary footage on the DVD, including speculation as to where the last, lost bits of film may be hidden!
The only thing about The Wicker Man that I find hard to swallow is some of the music (some). Music is critical to the film, yes, but face it…Britt Ekland couldn’t sing!
This is a work of fiction. It is not meant to offend anybody of any religion. It is a simply a horror movie, or more accurately a thriller. The only thing offensive about The Wicker Man is that an American film studio thought it was a good idea to try to remake it!
There was a time in the early 1990’s when I ate up all the new bands coming out. I bought every indi tape I could get my hands on in search of the “next thing” in heavy rock. I tweaked early to bands such as I Mother Earth, Tonic, Sven Gali, and Big Wreck. I still have my old I Mother Earth and Sven Gali promo tapes that arrived in the mail! Then suddenly in the 2000’s everything dried up and there weren’t any more new bands coming out that I liked. I stopped buying music by new rock bands.
Until I got Permission To Land.
The Darkness are probably the last “new” band (well, they’re only on album #4 now) to come out of the woodwork that I truly love (love being a big word). I’m also pleased that in 2015 they are back once again with a new lineup, album and tour. The story of my Darkness discovery and eventual love was recounted in Record Store Tales Part 80.
A lot of people thought this album was a novelty; a spoof of 80’s metal like Steel Panther are today. They are dead wrong. While The Darkness have ample humour in their music (as did Aerosmith mind you) they are deadly serious as musicians. The guitar work here is quite excellent. You can literally hear Thin Lizzy dripping from the strings, and it doesn’t get any more serious guitar-wise than that. Justin Hawkins takes his vocals to an almost absurd length, but listen carefully. Listen to how cleanly he hit those notes back then. There are very few rock singers who can hit notes like that so consistently and cleanly. Everybody says, “Ahh, but he’s copying Freddie Mercury.” Well first of all, a) no he’s not, Freddie was a very different kind of singer, and b) anybody who can hit notes as cleanly as Freddie is worthy of praise, not derision.
Yes, the leotards are a bit much, but what about the songs?
The album is slightly better sound-wise than demo quality. I think I read somewhere that Permission to Land is little more than an independent recording released by a major. The drum sound for example is thuddy and annoying. However it doesn’t matter, because these adrenaline-filled rockers don’t need embellishment. The band themselves are all the embellishment needed. 10 songs: four singles, and several great album cuts make this record a winner.
“Get Your Hands Off My Woman” is more than just the four-letter-word is was known for, a great little metal song with volume and unstoppable pace. Better still is “Growing On Me” which also had a great video. “I Believe In A Thing Called Love” is just a great, fun song period. I had to have it played at my wedding, where I did the air guitar on the dance floor. There are ballads too — “Love Is Only A Feeling” is the power ballad that Steven Tyler wishes he wrote for the latest Michael Bay turd.
The album cuts are stellar, with “Black Shuck” leading the pack, which masters that AC/DC chug-a-lug. I love “Givin’ Up” as well, with its point-blank lyrics about drugs. I used to think it was a sarcastic look at drugs until Hawkins suffered from his own addictions, but it certainly can be interpreted as an anti-drug song. That’s the great thing about music.
After the success of Permission to Land, the band would grow perhaps a bit too fast for the fans to keep up with. That’s OK though. It could have happened to Kiss too, when they did Destroyer. If the second album wasn’t your cup of tea, that’s alright. There were plenty of singles from this album, with great B-sides to collect. Not to mention that the splendid Hot Cakes reunion album should be sampled by the curious.
Don’t underestimate The Darkness. They were, and remain, an underrated band who provide fun, fast licks, and fuckin’ high lead vocals in their rock and roll!
4/5 stars
Fuck iTunes, buy the CD and check out the action-packed booklet. Just like rock bands used to do it.
You know how most comedies today put all the best stuff in the trailers, and the movies are crap? Paul is the opposite. The trailers sucked (Paul mooning out of a bus window?) but the movie is so much better. To my surprise and joy, Paul is a satisfying sci-fi-comedy with witty dialogue and great performances.
A lot of people (myself included) are sick of Seth Rogen, but Paul succeeds both because of and in spite of him. Simon Pegg and Nick Frost co-wrote and co-starred in a great movie here. It succeeds in combining characters that you actually care about with outrageous situations. Throw in some damn fine sci-fi references and superior casting, and now we’re cooking.
It is a science fiction nerd’s dream. Remember that “Homage-o-meter” that was on the DVDs of Spaced? You could do the same thing with Paul. From little bits of dialogue here and there (“Punch it!”) to flat out homages (re-enacting the Kirk-Gorn fight on the same mountain) this movie is loaded with loving references to the best of the best of the best.
What about the story?
Remember that “UFO” that crashed in Roswell in 1947? Turns out, that was Paul. He crash landed on Earth and has been here ever since, but he just wants to get home. See, the big nasty US government wants to cut out his brain, to gain his powers. In the decades since his arrival here on Earth, his image has been leaked out to us in the form of movies (great Speilberg voice cameo), so as to not shock us when contact is eventually revealed to the world. But before brain surgery and full disclosure, Paul escapes and runs into our two heroes, straight on their way from Comic-Con. Thus begins our sci-fi-bromance-road-trip comedy.
Before too long, Paul, Clive (Frost) and Graeme (Pegg) are on the run from the CIA, with others complicating the mix. Two “hillbilly types” and a Bible thumper are also chasing them for their own reasons. Along the way they meet Ruth (Kristin Wiig), a sheltered Christian girl who has her faith shaken by Paul, but provides much needed help. And let’s not forget Keith Nash! (I want a Keith Nash spinoff movie!)
The reason this works are many. One: the humour is not too outrageous as it is with many of today’s comedies. It combines the right amount of emotion with the juvenile humour. Two: the plot twists and turns. Its carefully woven elements all rhyme, emerging at the appropriate times. Lastly, all the characters are actual characters. It seems character is a writing skill lost in many of today’s movies. Well, Nick Frost and Simon Pegg do not lack that problem. Graeme and Clive are as well written and fully fleshed out as any classic comedy characters.
Jason Bateman, Bill Hader, Joe Lo Truglio, Sigourney Weaver, and the mighty, immortal Jeffrey Tambor (as pompous sci-fi author Adam Shadowchild) all lend their skills to this wonderful movie.
Bonus features are fun. I particularly enjoyed seeing how the live action stuff was filmed since Paul himself was all CG. There are also two cuts of the movie – both equally entertaining.
I can’t resist reviewing this golden oldie, the first compilation released by Purple Records in 1975. Purple had not yet broken up — that wouldn’t happen for another year — but most of the members on this record had left the band. It’s rarely a good sign when a band in their final death throes release a compilation album.
This CD is extraordinarily rare in these parts. When I first started managing the Record Store at which I spent most of my years, I put my name in “reserve” for any used copies that may come in. That was April 1996. Here we are in June 2015, and I only just got it on CD. I did get it on vinyl in the late 90’s, even though I have all the songs, because I enjoy having significant greatest hits albums in my collection. (See point 4, “Historical significance”, in Getting More Tale #367.) Unfortunately, as was the case with many CD issues from the late 80’s, the cover art isn’t even near the same colour as the original golden LP. The CD renders it to a dark, pee-stain yellow.
Saucy Aaron, from the KeepsMeAlive, texted me last month from Toronto, in Sonic Boom on Spadina. “Cool Purple comp,” he texted. “Very short though.” He sent me a pic with a $7.99 price tag, and I told him to snag it! That’s the kind of guy he is. He saw a Purple compilation CD and texted me a photo, unsure if I’d even care, on the off-chance that he’d be helping out a fellow collector. And he did! All it needed was a new jewel case.
Because I have all the songs elsewhere, I haven’t played 24 Carat Purple in a long time. It’s interesting that this, their first kinda-official hits album, only focuses on the Ian Gillan years, even though another version of Purple was currently functioning. I suppose that makes sense, from a contemporary point of view.
“Woman From Tokyo” is a great track to get the party started. I’ve only seen Purple once, on the Purpendicular tour. I recall that this was tune that really got the dudes in their mid-40’s bouncing. Now I’m in my mid-40’s, and I’m still bouncing to it. It’s a nice, safe Purple single. Jon Lord’s piano solo is, well, bouncy! I defy you to sit perfectly still with this song playing.
More to my taste is the accelerated blast through the clouds that is “Fireball”. To me, this track has it all — the perfect Purple mixture of adrenaline, speed, musicianship and that organ! The live “Strange Kind of Woman” brings things back to a moderate pace. Most of the time, I would be opposed to a live track substituting a studio version on a “hits” set, but Made in Japan was more popular than many of their studio albums! This live take, complete with Ian laughing through some of the lines, is probably my favourite anyway. Because Purple were as much a live act as an album band, one can easily make arguments for including live tracks of this stature.
“Never Before”, on the other hand, may have been a single but it’s nobody’s favourite Purple song. Of all their singles, perhaps it is the most ordinary. But at 4:00, it was about the right length to squeeze in before “Black Night” on a side of vinyl. “Black Night” was the real treat for fans in 1975, since this was the live version released only as a B-side before. This electric version is a must-own for its ferocity. It was recorded at the final show of the three that were taped for Made in Japan. Feedback-laden and ragged, this version of “Black Night” kills the others.
Side two of the record was devoted to long bombers, with “Speed King” coming in shortest at 5:50. That means this is the full-on version of “Speed King” complete with intro, which was edited off American copies of Deep Purple In Rock. For some listeners, this intro (purely 50 seconds of instrumental guitar-fucking and drum-wailing, followed by a mellow organ passage) would be completely new to them. Normally you would expect a record label to plop on an edited single version.
Made in Japan is the source for the last two tracks, “Smoke on the Water” and “Child in Time”. The mathematically inclined have probably already calculated that this means 24 Carat Purple is actually 57% live! I think that’s OK in the long run. Consider: “Smoke on the Water” in its live incarnation was released as a successful single. The live “Child in Time” contains, according to my friend Uncle Meat, “the greatest guitar solo of all time.” Since he said it, it must be true, and therefore inclusion of these two live versions is forgiven.
I feel like giving this long-deleted album a number rating is kind of meaningless. Yes it was a great listen, but it’s just a compilation from a band that most people agree are an albums band.
AEROSMITH – Done With Mirrors (1985 Geffen)
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