Reviews

REVIEW: Union – Live in the Galaxy (1999)

UNION – Live in the Galaxy (1999 Standback)

  • John Corabi – vocals/guitar
  • Bruce Kulick – guitar/vocals
  • Brent Fitz – drums/vocals
  • Jamie Hunting – bass/vocals

This great, forgotten Union live album should be added to the collections of any fans of John Corabi or Bruce Kulick.  Packed with great songs from Union, Motley Crue, Kiss, the Scream, and even Cheap Trick and the Beatles, this live album delivers on every level.  11 tracks live, plus two bonus studio songs.  Power to the music indeed!

There are no specifics about recording dates, but regardless the album has been well sequenced, opening with Union’s own album opener, “Old Man Wise”.   Very much a continuation of the Motley and Kiss albums of 1994 and 1997 respectively.  Mix them up with riff and groove sauce, you’d get something like “Old Man Wise”.  Bruce’s playing is always fascinating and “Crabby” was in top voice.  Grit and power are the words of the day.  This song pounds, and Bruce absolutely rules.  We go straight into the equally grooving but more upbeat “Around Again”.  Union had an excellent self-titled album out at the time, and it makes up the bulk of the album.  Fortunately the band’s original songs set a high bar.  Bruce Kulick doesn’t put out crap.  A third song from the debut, “Heavy D…” might be called a ballad, but really it’s a quiet song with heavy parts.  Or is it a heavy song with quiet parts?  It is performed with gusto in either guise.

“We’re gonna do something from Carnival of Souls!  This is called the ‘Jungle’, baby!”  Then Jamie Hunting comes in with that rolling bassline, originally played on album by Bruce himself.  Kulick’s past with Kiss makes an appearance on “Jungle”, a song Kiss never performed live, so quite a treat.  John Corabi’s spin on a Paul Stanley vocal is full of raspy power yet still appropriate.  Hearing this makes one wish that Kiss did have the balls to play it live.

That’s a lot of heavy rock in a row, and to lighten the mood, it’s the Union original “Love (I Don’t Need It Anymore)”, which is dedicated to a certain someone who was involved with a current event in the news at the time.  It’s a little more upbeat, a little more “Motley” and absolutely one of the best Union songs from the debut.  The chorus kills like a classic from Dr. Feelgood.  Corabi then takes us back to his earliest catalogue, The Scream’s “Man In the Moon”.  The Scream were a sort of musician’s super group, featuring Bruce Bouillet and John Alderete from Racer X.  The Scream was more mainstream than that.  This is a melodic rocker with a bluesy twist, and the band do a slamming job of it.

Bruce Kulick takes center stage on another Kiss song that was never played live, and his vocal debut:  “I Walk Alone”, which he wrote with Gene Simmons.  It begins with a short, Zeppelin-esque guitar exercise from Bruce.  As for the vocals, you gotta give Bruce credit for not going back and fixing things.  This is Kulick’s voice raw and exposed and imperfect and yet…perfect for the album.  In many ways, this is better than the Kiss version, as Bruce adds a really sweet guitar outro.

A fun unexpected cover next:  Cheap Trick’s “Surrender”!  The backing vocal abilities of the entire band enable them to easily pull this off.  You’d look at it on paper and scratch your head a bit, but it’s short work for these pros.  It’s all about the vocals.

A dramatic “Pain Behind Your Eyes” brings to the stage another soft/hard hybrid with wicked drumming and vocals.  However this is just a prelude to one of the heaviest Motley Crue songs ever:  “Power to the Music”.  Corabi takes center stage doing some screamin’ and preachin’ to the crowd.  The demanding song is handled ably by Corabi, seemingly relishing playing this awesome song live on the stage again.  They probably would have blown Motley off the stage doing the same song.

After some band intros, we get some Kulick solo wailing right into the final song “Tangerine”.  Nothing like the Zeppelin song, this is a riff-rocking groover with excellent melodic delivery by John Corabi.  Union were a melodic band, but John’s approach added the grit and grime that is like rock candy going down.  This song slays with a resilient groovy riff.

Bonus studio tracks are two:  an acoustic rendering of “October Morning Wind” from the debut, and a Beatles cover that blows away the more well know Oasis version.  First up though, the rich acoustics of “October Morning Wind” really bring warmth to a cold subject.  “My pain is measured by a sky that is old and grey,” sings John in a song that may well be about seasonal affective disorder.  Then, the Beatles cover is handled with ease.  “You’ve Got to Hide Your Love Away” benefits from similar acoustic warmth.  It sounds live in the studio, and again the lead and backing vocals make it work seemingly without effort!

Union really made a strong impression with their first two releases, the debut and the live album.  Was it too soon for a live album?  When you look at the setlist, absolutely not.  They had enough material with which to build a very strong set of songs, needing only one true cover (the Cheap Trick song).  The bonus acoustic tracks are icing.

4.5/5 stars

 

REVIEW: Mötley Crüe – From the Beginning (2025)

MÖTLEY CRÜE – From the Beginning (2025 BMG)

There are two things that Motley Crue are really good at:  Pissing off their fans, and releasing compilations.

In 2019, the Crue released The Dirt soundtrack, featuring four new songs and 14 classics.  In 2025, with the well running very dry, they released From the Beginning, featuring no new songs in its 19 tracks, and just one new version of an old classic.

From the Beginning is at least the 7th Crue compilation of hits, depending on what you count and what you don’t (I’m not counting box sets).  This is a band that has only 10 studio albums.  The well is so dry that this compilation includes several tracks from past compilations.   So much could have been done better.

Let’s start with the fail of the packaging.  It’s always interesting when a band chooses a photo of an old lineup rather than the current one.  The inside fold out also features an old photo, meaning current guitarist John 5 is not pictured here, even though he’s on the album.  There are no liner notes, no credits, just an inner sleeve with eight past Motley Crue logos.  (Corabi’s is of course missing, as are several other mid-period Motley Crue logos.)   It’s cheap grey and black printing, no colour.  Absolutely nothing of value in the packaging for any fan, new or old.

Moving on to the one new version of an old song:  the original 1985 recording of “Home Sweet Home” is remixed to include Dolly Parton, who has reinvented herself as a rocker recently, in duet form.  There have been many successful duets when one artist is recorded many decades later over an old song.  This is not one of them.  It sounds fake, and it sounds silly to have 2025 Dolly singing with 1985 Vince.  The guy’s not dead!  There’s no reason for this, except that 2025 Vince Neil is no match for 2025 Dolly Parton.  This congested sounding remix is truly awful, and not because of Dolly Parton.  When singing without the old Vince backing tracks, she sounds magnificent and still powerful.  Couldn’t they even get John 5 to record a new solo over top?  No; they continue to use Mick Mars on their new releases while publicly attacking him.  With all respect to the incredible Dolly Parton, this version of “Home Sweet Home” shouldn’t even count as part of the Motley Crue discography.

True to its word, From the Beginning is a chronological compilation, beginning with the common Elektra mixes of “Live Wire” and “Take Me to the Top”.  This one-two punch always serves well, and the compilation is off to a good start.  If anything, these songs sound more necessary today than ever, no matter who really played bass (which is very loud on this mastering)!  The crunch of Mick Mars’ guitar belching distortion is a satisfying sound, especially at its most primitive.  The classic suite of Shout at the Devil tracks are “Shout” itself, “Looks That Kill” and “Too Young to Fall In Love”.  Even two past superior compilations, Decade of Decadence and Greatest Hits (1998), didn’t include all three.  Decade featured just two songs per album, and excluded “Too Young”.  Greatest Hits (2009) did include all three, and most of the other songs on this set.  There’s something about these tracks that sound like they might be slightly remixed.  Wikipedia credits them as 2021 remasters, but…there’s something off.

Fortunately for the new fan making their first Motley purchase, the original “Home Sweet Home” is included in the Theater of Pain tracks, along with “Smokin’ in the Boys Room”.  For the old fan, we’ll wish they included something else like “Louder Than Hell”, but fat chance of that.  To the point, there should be a rule that “Home Sweet Home” only appears once on any single disc album.

The usual two from Girls, Girls, Girls (“Wild Side” and the title track) are followed by the usual five (yes, five) from Dr. Feelgood (title track, “Kickstart”, “Without You”, “Don’t Go Away Mad” and “Same Old Situation”).  These exact seven songs also appear on Greatest Hits (2009) though not in the same order, just in the same chunk.  Then, just like Greatest Hits, “Primal Scream” from Motley’s first compilation Decade of Decadence makes it appearance.  This song is like a wake up shot after snoozing through the same-old same-old.

At this point the compilation drops the album-by-album continuity, because as we all know, Vince Neil was fired from the band in 1992 after Decade of Decadence.  Motley doesn’t like to acknowledge several of the post-80s albums in their compilations, including Motley ’94 with John Corabi, and New Tattoo with Randy Castillo.  In this case, they also ignore 1997’s electronica-inflected reunion album Generation Swine and the new songs from the compilation albums of the era.  (These include the aforementioned Greatest Hits which had two new songs, and Red White & Crue which had four, all of varying quality.)  Instead we jump to 2008’s Saints of Las Angeles, a comeback album of sorts, and the last studio album the band would produce to date.  The title track is an appropriate addition and still kicks today with a chorus that is worthy of past glories.

Downhill from here, as we go to the irritating and completely un-memorable “The Dirt (Est. 1981)” from The Dirt soundtrack, itself a greatest hits with four new songs.  The presence of Machine Gun Kelly, who played Tommy Lee in the movie, makes this one a slog and an obvious attempt to lure in new younger fans.  Staying chronological, “Dogs of War” from the recent Cancelled EP is a nice addition since it features the current lineup and John 5 on guitar, but is otherwise forgettable.

Finally, the album closes on the Dolly duet, which we should really refer to as a fake duet since it sounds so achronological, both on the album and as a song.

For a similar but superior listening experience, just buy Greatest Hits, Decade of Decadence, or just the plain old 20th Century Masters, which at least had some text inside.

1.5/5 stars

REVIEW: Ginger Baker’s Air Force – “Man of Constant Sorrow” single (1970)

GINGER BAKER’S AIR FORCE – “Man of Constant Sorrow” (1970 ATCO 7″ single)

When Blind Faith broke up in 1969, Ginger Baker formed the Air Force featuring musicians such as Steve Winwood, Alan White and Denny Laine.  They released two albums, Air Force and Air Force 2, with the debut being a live album recorded at Albert Hall.  They also released one single, a studio version of the traditional “Man of Constant Sorrow”.  Its live counterpart was on the debut Air Force album, but the 3:31 studio version was only on the single.  Today you can buy several compilations and additional live albums, but in 1970 this single would have been one to seek.

Most people today are familiar with the version of “Man of Constant Sorrow” that was released as a single from the soundtrack O Brother Where Art Thou.  Based on the same traditional music, Ginger’s version is vastly different, though clearly the same song.  Opening with soft electric guitar picking by Denny Laine, Ginger soon comes in with a pitty-patter that is distinctly him.  Fiddles join in, and ample soulful backing vocals.  Aside from Laine’s emotional lead vocals, the defining characteristic of this song is the bombastic (but not out of place) drum pounding of Ginger Baker.  Horns join in at the halfway point, lending the song a celebratory Mardi Gras kind of feel.  Though it starts quiet and unassuming, it ends as a magnificent folk-soul monolith.

The single B-side is an instrumental live cut of the original song “Doin’ It” from the debut Air Force.  It was recorded 15 January 1970 at the Albert Hall with a ten-piece band including three saxophones and Hammond organs.  This is a tribal but funky jam, with the bass by Ric Grech blazing the trail.  Like “Man of Constant Sorrow” it builds louder and louder as it goes.  This short 3:47 (fade out) jam is in and out before you know it, but works as an intense but fun workout from some of the greatest musicians ever to hit the stage.  Certainly, the drums and two additional percussionists are a main focus and worth paying attention to.

A terrific single that is not too hard to find.

4/5 stars

EPSON MFP image

REVIEW: Ghost Super 7 Ultimates Papa Emeritus IV figure

So close… but rite here right now, so far…

SUPER 7 – Ultimates Papa Emeritus IV figure

7″ of satanic panic?  Absolutely, for here is a Papa Emeritus IV “Ultimates” figure from Super 7.  These limited edition deluxe action figures offer supreme poseability, lots of accessories, and supreme packaging.  But is it worth the $70 that Amazon was asking for this evil doll?

Let’s take a close look at the figure, his accessories and packaging.

Photos and packaging can be seen in above video

The box is a cathedral-like window, which looks great as a backdrop for your figure.  Papa can be displayed in his cloaks and mitre, or more simply in a shiny blue suit.  He has options for interchangeable heads, and a selection of pop-off hands for either guise.  The plain Papa has hands in plain black gloves while the more decorative Papa has hands with skeleton-like designs on them.  He has two soft-goods pieces of clothing to dress him up:  A vest-like undercloak, and a poseable wire-blacked cloak.  Both are intricately decorated.  Take care to keep both in excellent condition.

While it is easy to swap out Papa’s parts and clothing for any display option, this is the point at which the figure loses some character.  Fully cloaked, his articulation is limited.  You can’t lift his arms very high, which makes the “devil horn” hand kind of pointless.  He has a hand that can hold his microphone, but it works best with the two-piece mic stand so Papa doesn’t have to lift it.   Without the cloak, he can pose much better, simulating his dance moves from the video for “Rats”.  His shiny shoes look perfect for this.

Unfortunately, Papa needs at least one head with an open mouth.  Otherwise he never looks like he’s singing, which makes the microphone somewhat useless.

Super 7 got a lot right on this figure.  The articulation is good enough on the base figure.  The paint and details are spectacular, which is important for a premium figure.  Not enough attention was paid when it comes to his accessories.  Extra hands with varying finger positions are a standard feature now, but keeps like a cheat to include all of them in an accessory count.  You can only use two at a time, after all.   Instead of so many hands, an alternate “singing head” and perhaps Papa’s staff would be more useful.  I’m also quite fond of miniature albums coming with action figures, but Super 7 didn’t ask for my opinion.

If you can get one of these with free shipping or on sale, go for it.  Imperfect figures get imperfect scores.

3/5 stars

 

REVIEW: Thomas Polychuck – Thomas Polychuck (2024)

THOMAS POLYCHUCK – Thomas Polychuck (2024 Deko)

Out of the gates, Thomas Polychuck’s new instrumental solo album impresses.  With former Dream Theater keyboard player Derek Sherinian on almost every track, the direction is instrumental progressive rock.  Derek has plenty of room to shine, frequently playing off with the guitar and providing loads of those vintage Dream Theater hooks.

The opener “Genèse” commences the album very much like the familiar bands we love so much, with big guitars.  It then goes on its own fun tangents.  This fascinating track has guitar melodies and a really cool interlude with flute sounds.  Anyone who enjoys instrumental guitar rock will dig this track.  Sherinian adds loads of texture on keys.

Simon Phillips gets things going on “The Cyclone” with a cool tribal sounding drum intro.  Then Polychuck and Sherinian get jamming on a funky little groove, incorporating jazz, shredding, and rock riffing.  You can hear things reminiscent of Richie Kotzen’s solo work in the notes.  Derek and Thomas sound like they’re having a blast soloing with each other.  It sounds very live, however they achieved it.

Polychuck goes full jazz on “Dieze11”, a lovely piece with soft guitar and piano.  The soft drums are a nice change of pace, and the busy bassline has room to breathe.  The main feature is the guitar, which lingers nowhere for very long, before darting off in another direction.  The result is that it feels like the guitar is telling a little story.

Back to the shred, “1316” breaks off at a speedy pace, like a metal rocket fuelled by guitar.  Derek continues to complement the music with keyboard textures that explore different sounds and voices.  Though the guitars are cranked up, you can still hear jazz note choices in the solos.  Then, suddenly it breaks into a Rush-like groove from the mid-80s.

“Construct” gets even heavier, but fortunately Polychuck has the wisdom to lay down a more melodic guitar line overtop the heavy chords.  Between the guitar and keyboards, there are a lot of tasty bits here to grab on to.  “They Carry On” is another jazz number with upright bass by Maciek.  Picture a smoky jazz club at night.  Not too loud, and totally authentic.  Polychuck allows the bass to have its moment.   It is followed by the awesome “Reality”, an anthemic guitar number with some very nice melodic elements.

The unexpected ballad “Sign From Beyond the Veil” is the most beautiful track on the album.  With subtle organ by Chris Madden, Polychuck’s guitar sings softly of hopeful feelings.  A very uplifting track, with a vibe like classic Joe Satriani.  Soft though it may be, there are a lot of interesting guitar sounds going on.

The final track is a driver called “Retold Story” featuring Brian Tichy on drums.  The drums kick on this one, and Polychuck goes once again for a storytelling guitar style.  He goes from fast to slow, mood to mood, never staying too long in one place, but always offering interesting sounds and licks.

Having heard Polychuck’s earlier music, with influences across the board from pop to dance to metal, and now here with hardcore progressive rock and authentic jazz, one wonders where he can go next?  Classical, country, blues?  The sky is the limit for this talented musician.  This album would be cherished by lovers of musicianship, and those moments when progressive rock meets jazz.  An unexpected treat to finish 2024 with a flourish.

4/5 stars

DVD REVIEW: George Lucas In Love (1999)

GEORGE LUCAS IN LOVE (1999 MediaTrip)

Directed by Joe Nussbaum

This short, which pays homage to Star Wars creator George Lucas in the style of Shakespeare In Love, is a funny, creative little film that any old-school Star Wars fan will enjoy. A fictional account of how Lucas came up with his epic saga simply by taking inspiration from life around him, it is loaded with references both subtle and obvious. Much better than “spoof movies” today, George Lucas In Love, in a mere 9 minutes, is loaded with more laughs than the entire Scary Movie franchise. The Flanneled One himself is a fan.

It is 1967, and young George Lucas has writer’s block. He just can’t seem to finish his movie about space farming. Instead he decides to “write what he knows”, and we all know what happened after that.  Stay tuned for the not-so-surprise ending.

The DVD is padded out with some other unfunny shorts, Evil Hill, ll, Film Club, and Swing Blade. Don’t waste your time. There is also an audio commentary and some behind-the-scenes features.

Keeping the run time in mind, pick this up at a reasonable price if you can — which may be hard as it is out of print.

4/5 stars

#1204: By The Light of the Silvery Moon

O, By the light of the silvery moon
I want to spoon, to my honey I’ll croon love’s tune
Honeymoon keep a-shining in June
Your silv’ry beams will bring love dreams
We’ll be cuddling soon
By the silvery moon
(Edwards/Madden 1909)

Oh, the moon! That might explain things. You see, the moon affects the brain.
(Amman – Clash of the Titans 1982)

RECORD STORE TALES #1204:  By The Light of the Silvery Moon

I’m not a nocturnal person, though I used to pull a few allnighters with Jen when we were first dating.  I do have insomnia, so I often wake in the middle of the night.  At home, this usually means checking my email and having a drink before heading back to the sheets.  At the cottage, I enjoy stepping out into the cool summer air and having a look around.

I don’t bring a flashlight.  I let my eyes adjust to the darkness and wander.

You see things at night.  When visible, the moon lends a silvery sheen over the entire landscape.  Not quite enough to read by, but certainly enough to see the ripples of waves on the water.  Under the cover of trees, silver slits of light pierce the darkness, creating spotlights on the earth.  If there is a breeze, the movement of the trees can really make you feel as if you’re not alone.

You hear things at night.  Once or twice I heard a coyote, crying like a human child and echoing through the valley.  Another deep dark night, I heard a growling that I could not see.  We do get bears here.  Sometimes the swaying trees can create a growling sound as they move in the night, but this growl scared me and I made a quick retreat back to the house.

I enjoy the total solitude at 3 AM.  I feel more connected to nature by the silence (other than wind, waves and nocturnal beasts).  I don’t wear shoes on these walks.  I can feel the grass or cool sand beneath my feet.  Sometimes I stub my toe on a tree root, but that’s a small annoyance in the grand calculus of the pitch black night.

I try not to make a sound.  Just observe with my senses. Feel the cool air on my back.  It’s mental health maintenance.  While I love living in Kitchener (for many great reasons), I feel truly free and alive in the wilderness.

A special moonlight treat is when the silvery satellite turns blood orange.  A moonset is a very special sight that not many get to know, or even know about.  I’ve seen a few of them.  When a crescent moon hits the horizon, people describe as the image of a blazing sailing ship on the edge of the lake.  This year, wildfire smoke has prevented us from seeing the moon kiss the horizon, but its orange glory remains as a fiery ember in the sky.  When the moon is full, you can imagine it is a burning Balrog, climbing out of a gaping maw in the dark mines of Moria.

Truly the world looks alien at night in the light of the moon.  Perhaps that is why I love it so much.  I have always yearned to see other worlds, but the beauty of the Earth is enough to last many lifetimes, if you go out at night under the light of the silvery moon.

 


Of all the versions of “By the Light of the Silvery Moon”, Little Richard’s is one of the highest charting, going to #17 in the UK, 50 years after the song was written. Other renditions were performed by Gene Vincent, Doris Day, Fats Waller, Etta Jams, Burl Ives, Ray Charles, Julie Andrews, and even Bugs Bunny (Mel Blanc) among countless versions.

#1202: Jock Jams

RECORD STORE TALES #1202 Jock Jams

At the Beat Goes On, we had a lot of teachers as customers.  Teachers were interesting customers.  They were like sheep, all looking for the same thing.  It was so bizarre the first time I was swamped by teachers all coming in looking for the same CD.  A CD that was out of print, incidentally.  That CD was TSN’s Jock Jams disc.

In the late 90s, teachers were told at a teaching convention that kids learn better to certain kinds of upbeat music.  1995’s Jock Jams was given as an example of the kind of music to play in class.  Teachers were told to get a copy, play it in class while kids worked, and note the improvement in their performance.  Jock Jams!  That is what they were told to buy.  They couldn’t get it at the mall, since it was out of print.  So, they came to us, a used CD outlet.  We were swamped, at every location, by teachers.

“Do you have Jock Jams?” asked the first one.  I didn’t have one in stock, but I called one of our other stores who did have it.

“Can you get them to hold it for me?  I’ll be right there,” said the teacher.  That teacher would be the only one to score Jock Jams on that day.  Shortly thereafter, a second customer came in asked for the exact same CD.  That always raised my eyebrows when it happened.  When multiple people came in asking for the same album on the same day, over and over again, it meant something had happened.  Sometimes it meant an artist won an award.  Other times it meant the artist had died.  This time, much to my surprise, it because of a teacher’s convention, where they were told to buy an out-of-print and out of date CD.

“Do you have Jock Jams?” asked a second customer.

“No,” I answered in surprise. “We just sold our only copy.  Literally just now, a guy came in and got our only copy.”

“When can you get another? I need it for my class. I’m a teacher.”

“Well, we are a used CD store, so we’ll get another copy when it is traded in. I can put you on a wait list,” I answered.

“How long will that take? I need it for September.”

“Impossible to guess,” I replied. “The CD is out of print.  Someone has to have a copy, and trade it in first. I can put you on a waiting list.  Or I could get you Jock Jams 2?” I offered.

“No no,” answered the teacher.  “We were told to get Jock Jams 1.”

“Jock Jams 2 will have similar music, just newer songs that your students will know better than Jock Jams 1,” I mentioned.

“They said to get Jock Jams 1,” replied the teacher with zero initiative.  And so, the customer left their name and number and I put them on a wait list.

Then the next customer came in.

“Do you have Jock Jams?” they asked.

“No, we sold our only copy this morning. Are you a teacher?” I asked.

“Yes, how did you know?”

Because of that teacher convention, we had 20 customers come in that day for Jock Jams, and added seven names to the waiting list. It took years to clear that waiting list.  Notably, a few went for the more recent Jock Jams 2, but most were steadfast.  “We were told to use Jock Jams 1,” they would answer.

“Well I can tell you that you’re not going to get Jock Jams 1 in this town, this semester,” I regrettably informed them.  “Your students won’t even know the songs on Jock Jams 1.”

“We’re supposed to use Jock Jams 1,” they would reply.  OK…lots of luck!

We ended up cranking our prices up on Jock Jams 1 any time they came in stock.  They used to be $8.99.  Now we would ask $19.99.  Supply and demand, and there was very little supply and much demand.  Teachers didn’t want alternatives to Jock Jams. “We were told to get Jock Jams,” they would bleat like sheep.  This went on a couple years, every August.

Every time I see a Jock Jams CD, I think of that damn teacher convention that brainwashed these people into thinking that Jock Jams, and only Jock Jams, would improve their students’ learning.  Only towards the end of the rush would teachers finally break down and buy something else that was similar in style, like a MuchDance album.

I lost a lot of faith in the teachers of the late 1990s during the week of that convention, and the rush on Jock Jams.  No imagination, no flexibility, no originality.  What was the world coming to?

 

 

REVIEW: Hello! My Name Is Blotto – The Movie!

HELLO!  MY NAME IS BLOTTO – THE MOVIE! (2025 – 1 hour 44 minutes)

Directed by Rob Lichter

I am a firm believer in documenting music history.  There are many groups throughout rock history that have had hits, fans, and stories to tell, but with scarce documentation.  One such band was Blotto – until now.

In 2025, director Rob Lichter (also known as Bert Blotto) finally released the long-gestating Blotto documentary film, Hello! My Name Is Blotto – The Movie!  This film has been a labour of love, and that love comes across in every frame.  Meticulous attention to detail, comprehensive live and TV clips, and extensive interview footage with all the band members make up the bulk of this loving look at Albany’s greatest…comedy rock band?  Rock comedy ensemble?  What are Blotto anyway?  This is a question that comes up during the movie several times.  Why didn’t the record labels get what Blotto were selling?

“We were not musical enough to be a musical band, and not funny enough to be a comedy act!” sums up guitarist and singer Broadway Blotto.  “We wanted fame with a living wage.”

“We weren’t rich and famous; we were solvent and well known,” responds guitarist and singer Bowtie Blotto.

Starting out in the early 1970s as the Star Spangled Washboard Band, three of the founding members of Blotto first began playing comedic bluegrass music.  They used costumes and aliases:  “Broadway Harris” for example (no relation to Bill & Emily).   The roots of Blotto were forming, though in a genre far removed from rock.  You’ll see early TV appearances, featuring Bowtie’s much bigger hair, and some music that was later rocked up into Blotto songs, such as “High School Honey”.  The Star Spangled Washboard Band earned great reviews and plenty of laughs.  Their knack for quick comedy was evident, as the chemistry between Sarge, Broadway and Bowtie blossomed.  It’s possible that I saw the Star Spangled Washboard Band on television back when I was a child, as they appeared on programs like the Mike Douglas Show, which was a TV staple in our house.

From the bass-playing hotspot of Ballston Spa, New York, came Cheese Blotto, a gifted musician who had a knack for groove.  The Washboard Band never launched into super-stardom though, as misfortune derailed a big New York City gig.  The band broke up in 1978, but of course, they couldn’t stay apart forever.  Working as a bartender, Cheese was eager to be on stage instead of serving drinks, so he called his old buddies for a jam.  They didn’t even have a name, but washboard was out and rock was in.

The band acquired singer Blanche Blotto, who started as a fan (a “Blottette”), and became a key member, singing lead on “Stop (In The Name of Love)”.  Finally, they found drummer Lee Harvey Blotto, who fit in like a glove from day one.  “You’ll know the songs better than they do,” he was assured.

Blotto wisely decided to record some demos.  “I Wanna Be A Lifeguard” became a hit, earning radio play in New York City, and crucial airtime on the fledgling MTV.  “Lifeguard” was in fact the 36th song ever played on MTV, on day one.  Did you know the video was filmed on a freezing cold April day?

Shortly after “Lifeguard”, Blotto secured a recording with legendary producer Bob Clearmountain, which yielded two songs in one overnight session.  Unsurprisingly, they sounded great.  Sadly, it never led to a major label deal as they hoped.  “I think Atlantic Records is going in a different direction than Blotto,” went one heartbreaking rejection.

The film is divided into six sections, each one covering an era of the band.   It is augmented by interviews with the people who were there at the time, including MTV VJ Martha Quinn to talk about “Lifeguard” burning up TV screens nationwide.  Buck Dharma, who shared their sense of humour, appears to discuss the hit “Metal Head”.  We even get to see outtakes from the innovative music video.   This movie is packed full of facts, fans, and perspectives from Albany New York, where they became local heroes.  Sadly, the talented Cheese Blotto passed away in 1999, and only TV footage remains of him.  Though we lost Sarge in 2019, plenty of interviews with him remain.  Past members Chevrolet, Hammerhead and Clyde Blotto also appear, fleshing out the documentation of the different lineup changes.

“Chevrolet Blotto, our newest Blotto, was auditioned mainly on the strength of his last name,” jokes Broadway in a vintage interview clip.

There are clips of unreleased songs such as “I Love You Calvin Klein”.  There are so many stories; hilarious stories.  Detailed stories about the creation of the songs and the album covers.  There are tragic stories of loss, and bizarre tales of Blotto haters.  Who could hate Blotto?

This is the only unanswered question that the film leaves open.  Who could hate Blotto?  Though the labels had no idea what to do with them, the fans kept coming back through theme nights, Blottoweens, reunion gigs and new members.  The band never really packed it in.  They moved on; got other work.  Lee Harvey even did double duty as a lawyer and a lifeguard.  But they never really stopped being Blotto.  As Blanche says, it’s always a part of them.

Though I laughed throughout the film, there are tears to be shed as well.  Both Cheese and Sarge went too soon, and it is clear that they are missed.  Each member of the band brought something to the table.  Sarge was not just a singer, but also an artist.  Cheese’s disco grooves were magically delicious, and his decision to go bald brought a new visual dimension to the band.  Their quick wits are on sharp display in the vintage footage.

I have always felt like the world needed more Blotto.  Their small treasure chest of tunes is easy to devour in a sitting or two.  Now, we finally have more Blotto, and a serious addition to the catalogue it is.  Hello! My Name is Blotto – The Movie! is a constantly entertaining deep dive on a band that we needed more of.  A band that the world needs to hear.  Anyone who likes music would enjoy this film, and maybe become a new fan, just a few decades late.

5/5 stars

 

GUEST REVIEW: Twisted Sister – Love Is For Suckers (1987) by Tommy Morais (and remembering A.J. Pero)

My old friend and collaborator Tommy Morais passed away in 2024, but miraculously, I found this 2015 email from him.  It contained a complete review of Twisted Sister’s Love Is For Suckers album that we never published, and a memorial for Twisted Sister drummer A.J. Pero, who had recently died.  I am please to finally publish this final review that Tommy sent me to post.  Rest in peace Tommy.

TWISTED SISTER – Love Is For Suckers (1987 Atlantic)
by Tommy Morais – written March 28, 2015
“The ‘Soft & Filler’ album…”  Bought in 2012 in France for something like 17 euros!

Twisted Sister’s fifth and final studio album Love Is For Suckers (unless you count the band’s 2004 Still Hungry, a collection of re-recordings of Stay Hungry) is one that tends to divide people. Some hardcore fans dismiss it as too pop and lacking much substance, while others have a soft spot for it and thought it was an enjoyable release at the time. There’s some claims to be made about both opinions. The main problem with with Love Is For Suckers is that it really isn’t a Twisted Sister album. “Wake Up The Sleeping Giant” is deceiving in that it almost sounds like classic TS. Yet only Dee Snider as an original member remains, and then there’s Joey “Seven” Franco who was in the current lineup on drums. It really should have been a Dee Snider solo album which is what it was intended as and truly was, but instead the record company pressured this to be released as a Twisted Sister album.

Then it is plagued by a few big issues, besides the absence of the classic lineup. Did you ever see Reb Beach and Kip Winger receiving credits on a Twisted Sister album? Well, they played on this. Probably not a happy thought for most Twisted Sister fans, as it ended up taking an ultimately softer and a more pop direction. Then you have to consider that it may have been competitive and cutting edge in 1987, but Love ls For Suckers has not held up well with time. Also for an album title that claims love “sucks”, it’s ironic that most of these songs are well… love songs.

What’s with the drum sound?! The songs are wimpy but with a thunderous, big drum sound which leads to question that maybe Joey was a good drummer who ended up playing on the wrong album. The production by Beau Hill is about what you’d expect, very “1987” and time has not been too kind to its sound.

Opener “Wake Up The Sleeping Giant” is misleading. 1) It sounds like Twisted Sister and 2) It’s the best song on the album, and it leads you to think (and hope) the rest may be up to this standard. “Hot Love” was and is a great candy rock piece tailored for 1987; cheesy but fun and a good overall choice of single. It’s one of the most memorable songs (remember the video that went along?). The title track is actually not a bad rocker at all, it’s consistent as Snider does a good vocal performance and it’s somewhat catchy. This is where the album takes a slide in the quality department with “l’m So Hot For You” and “Me And The Boys” (this one especially is embarrassing) being generic filler tracks that halt any momentum the album had going for it. Sandwiched in between those songs is the slightly better rocker “Tonight” which showcases some aggression; not a bad tune at all. “One Bad Habit” is more filler material. “I Want This Night To Last Forever” has a Van Hagar feel to it, especially during the chorus but is nothing to write home about either. “You’re All That l Need” tried to be a big power ballad but it failed during the chorus, even though it had a nice build up. The keyboards prevent it from being a strong ballad like “The Price”, and as a result it sounds a little too soft and thin. The closing “Yeah Right” ends thing on a more positive note. It’s a solid upbeat rocker and one of the heaviest songs on an album that could’ve used more songs of this calibre.

I own the remastered version with four extra songs. “Statuary Date” is the worst of the bunch. “Feel Appeal” is better than some of the songs that made it onto the actual album, it’s more straight up rock and a little catchier. “I Will Win” is rocking but the chorus doesn’t get it right; close but no cigar. “If That’s What You Want” became “Me And The Boys” although it’s earlier incarnation was stronger and had better lyrics. If you ask me this version should’ve made the album instead!

There you have it. Any way you slice it, Love Is For Suckers is definitely, without a doubt, the worst Twisted Sister album. It suffers from the production, is full of fillers and it doesn’t feature Jay Jay French, Eddie Ojeda, Mark Mendoza, A.J Pero (who left before this was released), even though the liner notes say they were a part of it (minus Pero, replaced by Joey Franco). The first two songs, and the album cover, are the only things that are truly memorable about LIFS. The rest is really unfocused and sub-par. Twisted Sister’s decline had already begun with their previous effort, 1985’s Come Out And Play which would show cracks of the band’s implosion, but this one was a commercial disappointment failing to reach gold status or chart successfully. Simply put, Twisted Sister was no longer a band at this point and the album did nothing to stop them from breaking up and was quite frankly just not very good.

2/5 stars

Mike liked this album slightly more.  Click here for his review.

REMEMBERING A.J. PERO by Tommy Morais

It was grade six.  I was 11 years old, and it was the Friday before a holiday, which meant the whole class got to do nothing but chill and watch a movie. For the rest of the day our teachers let us hang out and do nothing. We each brought pop, chips or both to share. One of my friends Maxime brought one of his dad’s CDs. That CD? Twisted Sister’s greatest hits. He asked the teacher if he could play it for us, and the rest is history. I was introduced to my first taste of Hard Rock and Metal. I distinctively remember telling one of my friends “this is not bad huh?”, to which he agreed. I glanced at the album cover. It said “Twisted Sister Big Hits & Nasty Cuts“. Then l proceeded to tell Maxime that this (ugly) “girl band” was pretty good. I wasn’t familiar with Glam/Hair/80’s metal at that point and even less so with the look. Truth is l had been exposed to some AC/DC, Loverboy and Metallica prior to that but this was the first time it really clicked.  Maybe it was just just the right age, the right time. There you have it, Twisted Sister was the first band I recall really taking a liking to. From then on l discovered my dad and his brother’s LPs and played them on the turntable (I remember digging the first Van Halen a lot).  I definitely have a soft spot for Twisted Sister.
It is with sadness that I learned of longtime drummer and classic lineup member A.J. Pero’s unfortunate passing. Pero was a crucial part of the band and its sound, and a great drummer too. I approached Mike about maybe doing something Twisted Sister related on his blog to which he was very enthusiastic. I wanted to review something AJ played on, like Come Out And Play as l plan to review all of TS’s material in the upcoming days, but with time restraints l had to settle for my (still brand new) Love ls For Suckers. The band has said that were to make some big announcement next week. One can only assume that it is regarding Twisted Sister’s future as a band. Jay Jay said on social media that they were already thinking about hanging it up prior to Pero’s passing. Then Dee Snider said it would be profitable to the Pero family if the band kept playing and that they were thinking about winding down in 2016 for the band’s 40th anniversary. I’m not against them continuing performing live and going out on a final tour to honour AJ and the anniversary of the band just as l am not opposed to the band calling it quits. I have a feeling they’ll at least play a few more shows and maybe do one last concert CD/DVD (that would be cool). Rest in peace A.J., the rock world lost a great drummer.