Directed by Michael Crichton and featuring Gene Simmons
Being in was never enough for Gene Simmons. Dating Cher and Diana Ross gave him a taste of Hollywood stardom. He saw movies as his next mountain to climb. Gene secured an audition with novelist and sometimes director Michael Crichton. Crichton asked Gene to communicate, without saying any words, his desire to kill him. Whatever Gene did worked, and he scored the role without even having to read for it.
Crichton’s next film Runaway was a Tom Selleck sci-fi vehicle and Gene played the villain Dr. Charles Luther. Turning his back on Kiss and leaving Paul Stanley to do all the heavy lifting, Simmons cut his hair and got filming.
Set in the “near future”, Runaway depicts an America in which robots are commonplace. Every household has some, and they have failsafes built in to protect humans. Selleck played Jack Ramsay, a veteran cop now on the “runaway squad”, a quiet department dedicated to capturing errant robots. His latest case is a shocker. A robot has committed the first ‘bot-human homicide in history. What caused it to malfunction and deliberately kill its owners? Ramsay discovers a strange chip inside designed not only to override its safety protocols, but also to order the robot to kill. But who would do such a thing?
Who else? The evil Dr. Charles Luther played by the God of Thunder himself.
Dr. Luther developed new templates that allow robots to identify and assassinate specific humans. They are worth a fortune on the black market, and so Luther killed his partners and went rogue. However his ladyfriend Jackie (Kirstie Alley) doublecrossed him and stole the chips. When Ramsay and his cop partner Karen find Jackie, they narrowly escape Luther who was tracking her. Not only does he have killer robots, but also a huge-ass handgun that has homing bullets that can even turn corners. They try to set up him by having Jackie return the stolen chips, but in one of his best scenes, Gene Simmons stabs her in the back in the middle of a kiss.
Jackie didn’t turn over all the chips. Ramsay still has some. Being the evil genius that he is, Luther hacks the police computers and finds out where Ramsay lives. This leads to a very typical final confrontation, in which Luther kidnaps Ramsay’s son and brings him to an under-construction skyscraper. Of course he would. It’s a standard movie cliche involving elevators and heights. Conveniently, the movie establishes early that Ramsay has a fear of heights. Of course he does!
Luther does have one neat gadget for this long and fairly boring ending. He has robotic spiders that spit acid, programmed to kill anything that comes down from the building. Tom Selleck eventually bests Gene Simmons as you knew he would, but Gene also gets one of the cheesiest movie after-deaths you will ever see. You know those scenes when you think the villain is dead, but he’s not? Gene gets to make a funny face and go “RAAAAHHHHH!” before dropping down dead for real this time.
Michael Crichton was certainly a fine science fiction writer, with titles like Jurassic Park and The Andromeda Strain to his credits. As a movie director, he was less successful. The Great Train Robbery (1979) starring Sean Connery and Donald Sutherland, and based on his own novel, was his best work. Others point to Westworld (1973) as his best work as a director. The main point is, nobody looks to Runaway for movie gold. It’s sluggish, clunky and at times pretty goofy. As a science fiction film, it utilized intelligent concepts and envisioned a future that was very different for the cinema in 1984. Runaway had a story idea. Jack Ramsay was a complicated character, with a cliche but workable back story. It was just poorly executed. One redeeming value is its Jerry Goldsmith score, which was his first all-electronic soundtrack.
While Runaway isn’t considered Michael Crichton’s best film, it might be Gene’s. His next roles were less flattering. He played a transvestite villain in Never Too Young to Die with John Stamos. There was a cameo in the horror cult classic Trick Or Treat. Opposite Rutger Hauer, he played a stereotypical terrorist in Wanted: Dead or Alive. His last film before returning to Kiss full-time was an early George Clooney film called Red Surf. Gene was a friendly weapons dealer.
Meanwhile in Kiss, Paul Stanley had clearly taken over leadership. All the singles were his. Since Gene had short hair, he wore a pretty silly wig on stage with Kiss. None of this helped his image in the eyes of fans. He did earn a good review for Runaway from Roger Ebert, but otherwise the movie was a dud.
It’s true: By all measurements, Hero, Hero is an exploitive compilation of Judas Priest material. Their first record label, Gull, was prone to do this. However this is no typical “hits” set; this one is of interest to collectors and die hard fans.
Hero, Hero (named for a lyric from the song “Dying to Meet You”) was originally released in 1981 to take advantage of Priest’s rising star. The original two releases on Gull records, Rocka Rolla and Sad Wings Of Destiny, had been exploited previously in a compilation called The Best Of Judas Priest, which was a single record. Hero, Hero was a double record which included all of Rocka Rolla and most of Sad Wings, as well as the crucial Joan Baez cover, “Diamonds and Rust”, in an alternate take (previously heard on Best Of).
So, if you have all that material already, why is this album required at all? Cover art aside, of course. That cover (a pre-existing painting) is brilliant. There is also a Kiss bootleg called Barbarize with the same cover.
The reason is revealed in the liner notes. All of Rocka Rolla had been remixed for this release. Why is unknown, as that record sounded just fine for what it is. The remixes are, in general, not even all that different. The major changes are made during “Cheater”, the “Winter” suite, and “Rocka Rolla” itself, during which major portions of the songs are noticeably shifted around. “Rocka Rolla” has its verses rearranged, and there’s a burst of harmonica in “Cheater” where there never was before.
The remix done to Rocka Rolla doesn’t really add or subtract anything from the album, which makes it that much harder to understand why it was done. Why Gull records spent the money to remix these tracks is unknown, and the names of the engineers involved are a mystery. But there it is: Rocka Rolla remixed in its entirety but not in order, here on the Hero, Hero album. Because they’re less familiar to the ear, they sound fresh, but in many cases you’d struggle to point out differences. A little reverb here, a little echo there.
Highlights including a bluesy “Cheater” and the flanged chug of “Diamonds and Rust”. The six tracks from Sad Wings of Destiny are brilliant. “Dreamer Deceiver” and “Deceiver” are used to open this CD, but that is not the original running order. Normally the album begins with “Prelude” and “Tyrant”, also from Sad Wings. The original Canadian cassette version on Attic maintained the original running order with “Prelude” at the start. Essentially, the Connoisseur Collection CD has side one and side two flipped.
Fair warning to CD buyers: There are some shoddy reissues of this album that don’t have the remixed tracks. Transluxe is one such version. To make your life easier you might just want to look for an original 1981 LP. The pictured CD from Connoisseur Collection (1995) does have the remixes, so you’re good to go if you spot one.
– Animalize Live Uncensored(from 4 CD set Radio Waves 1974-1988) (2015 American Icons broadcast release)
The Animalize tour was the most successful that Kiss had done since the original lineup. It was an exciting stage show including a finale with the band playing on a levitating platform over the stage. It was logical to film the Detroit concert, returning to the Cobo Hall where much of Kiss Alive! was forged in 1975. It had been a long time since Kiss released anything live. The sequel album Alive II came in 1977, and then Kiss underwent radical upheaval and change, as we have documented through this series. In the 1970s there was a pattern: Three studio albums and then a live album. Animalize was the sixth studio album since Alive IIwith no Alive III on the horizon.
Fans had their own theories as to why Alive III never materialized when due, but it likely has a lot to do with the lineup changes, shifts in direction, and fading fortunes. These events all struck right around the time when the third live album would have been appropriate, but as Kiss replaced members and took off the makeup, they had to re-establish themselves as a valid, current entity not dependant on past glories.
The Animalize Cobo Hall concert that was filmed was released in 1985 as the home video, Animalize Live Uncensored. For an entire generation of Kiss fans, Animalize Live Uncensored was our own Alive III. You could break down KISStory up to this point into three distinct eras as seen in the chart below. Kiss had a whole new generation of fans, the MTV generation, who associated the makeup with ancient history. We didn’t have our own Kiss Alive. Without one, we made Animalize Live Uncensored into our unofficial Alive III.
Kiss were introducing yet another guitar player to the fans, but Bruce Kulick was fitting in great. Animalize Live Uncensored gave the fans at home a chance to check out his interpretations of new and old Kiss classics. He gave the Mark St. John tracks a smoother soloing style with more emphasis on hooky licks. The threw on tons of the flash that was in vogue at the time, but he didn’t showboat. He did exactly what the bosses (Paul and Gene) wanted, and he did it well enough to win over fans and keep the gig.
The Kiss of the 80s were way, way faster than the Kiss of the 70s. Eric Carr could play things that Peter Criss couldn’t, and speed was in fashion. Even old songs like “Cold Gin” and “Detroit Rock City” were sped up and 80s-ized. The fast stuff from their 80s albums, like “Fits Like a Glove” and “Young and Wasted” are done up even faster. Lots of songs by the original band such as “Shout it Out Loud”, “Christine Sixteen”, “Firehouse”, “Strutter” and many more were dropped in favour of new ones. “Under the Gun”, “Thrills in the Night” and “Heaven’s on Fire” were the newest, while plenty of songs from Lick it Up and Creatures were also retained. Using the chart above for reference, only five Kiss songs from the first two eras combined were included. The third era, never before represented in live form, gets ten tracks. The rest of the space is taken up by solos: Paul Stanley (guitar), Gene Simmons (bass) and Eric Carr (drums). There is no Bruce Kulick solo. As you have probably surmised, a Paul Stanley feature solo is as basic as they get, with Gene’s only a modicum more memorable. Eric Carr’s is fun and flashy — more so on video.
One big highlight of Animalize Live Uncensored is Eric Carr’s lead vocal debut on a Kiss release. The Fox was given “Young and Wasted” from Lick It Up to sing, in addition to Peter Criss’ part in “Black Diamond”. And so Kiss fans began a long and painful wait to hear him sing something on a Kiss studio album.
For dyed in the wool Kiss fans, Animalize Live Uncensored is universally remembered for mainly one thing: that is Paul Stanley’s epic song introductions. “Love Gun” is the most legendary, a tale of Paul “partying” too much and having to go to the doctor to get himself checked out. The nurse decides to “start this examination just a little bit early” and asks Paul to remove his pants…where she discovers his (wait for it) “LOVE GUN”! There are so many great Paul intros on this video that it’s worth checking out for them alone. Full visuals help.
But what about a CD release, for that generation of fans for whom this is their Alive III? There are options. None are perfect. In fact, there isn’t even a DVD version. There are only semi-official looking bootlegs and the old original VHS. For CDs, you must go with a radio broadcast release, and none are perfect. Single disc versions are obviously trimmed for time and usually have 15 tracks including a couple solos. There is also a two disc broadcast from WLLZ in Detroit which has all 18 songs and all the solos too. This is available on a quadruple disc set called Radio Waves 1974-1988, released in 2015.* It even has intros and raps not included on the original Animalize Live VHS release! “Black Diamond” has a much longer introduction and much of the talking isn’t available elsewhere. During the encores, they mess around with the traditional “Oh Susannah”. The other intros and raps, the classic ones, are edited or missing completely! You just can’t win.
Only one track from this concert has been officially released on LP and CD: “Heaven’s On Fire”, which was Kiss’ contribution to Ronnie James Dio’s Hear N’ Aid – Stars album in 1986. Kiss completists will want to make sure they have that one.
One could meticulously paste in all of Paul Stanley’s missing and edited stage raps, and add them to your tracklist. It would be bloody time consuming. You’d have to listen to your compiled creation a few times to justify the time spent putting it together. But it could be done. It really is a shame that this broadcast CD is a few intros shy of complete. The sound is iffy at times too, with a lot of static where there shouldn’t be. But for the time being, it’s the best we got.
ALICE COOPER – The Life and Crimes of Alice Cooper(1999 Rhino 4 CD set)
With the benefit of hindsight, 1999 was way too early for Alice Cooper to be looking back with a comprehensive box set. His new album Paranormal will be out this month. He’s been consistently touring and recording. The picture was different in 1999 though, since Alice had been quietly under the radar for much of the decade and there was no sign of new music coming.
This Rhino box set is pretty comprehensive. Though there are plenty more rarities out there to get on singles and elsewhere, Rhino served up a very generous selection of them. Starting in 1966 with singles by The Spiders and The Nazz, Alice’s sound begins to evolve. Those early bands were 4/5 of the original Alice Cooper group: only drummer Neal Smith had yet to join. The early singles are unfocused compared to what Alice was going to do in a couple years. “Don’t Blow Your Mind” and “Lay Down and Die, Goodbye” (sometimes known as “I’ve Written Home to Mother”) are sloppy psychedelia. “Hitch Hike” is like rockabilly. “Why Don’t You Love Me” is late 60s style rock and roll with a nice harmonica part. It sounds influenced by the Beatles.
A demo version of “Nobody Likes Me” is the first “official” Alice Cooper Group track and it sees the sound veer closer to where they were headed. It has a sing-song melody that recalls “School’s Out” later on. A few tracks from Alice’s first two albums (Pretties For You and Easy Action) demonstrate a work in progress. “Reflected” is an early version of something that would be re-written as “Elected”. The band was still very psychedelic and not as tight as they would become.
There is a sudden shift, and Alice Cooper emerges as the classic artist we know and love when he hooked up with producer extraordinaire Bob Ezrin. “Caught in a Dream” (a single edit) and a number of essential tracks from Love It to Death kick the box set right in the ass and it suddenly becomes a very engaging listen, when before it was just…interesting. A quintet of songs from the next album Killer are just as special, though including “Halo of Flies” would have been appropriate too.
Before heading into the School’s Out material there is a rare demo entitled “Call it Evil”. A small portion of the music would make it into the the classic West Side Story tribute “Gutter Cat vs. the Jets” (also included), but this is its own song and otherwise unreleased. The single version of “School’s Out” is an obvious inclusion, but these two are the only tracks from School’s Out, a baffling set of omissions. Granted, “School’s Out” plays like a concept album and is tricky to split up for a box set, but it is under-represented here, period.
Billion Dollar Babies is considered a peak of this period, and gets five tracks of its own, all brilliant. “Elected” is the single version. “No More Mr. Nice Guy” is a highlight of Alice’s entire career and it still sounds fresh. Another rarity ensues which is “Slick Black Limousine”, a UK exclusive flexi-disc release. It sounds more like early Alice Cooper group material, with Alice doing his best Elvis. The end of the original group was nigh, unfortunately, and Alice’s next album Muscle of Love was noticeably lacking something. Maybe it’s because Bob Ezrin didn’t produce it, but the band was also on the verge of splitting. Addictions were hurting them. They were still making great rock and roll, just not…as great. “Respect for the Sleepers” is a demo version of “Muscle of Love”, an unreleased track with lyrics inspired by Alice’s “dead drunk friends” (Jimi, Janis, Jim). There are more songs from Muscle of Love included than there were for School’s Out, which is odd but alright.
At this point, Alice split from the original band. Then there are a pair of rarities featuring Alice from an obscure rock opera called Flash Fearless Vs. the Zorg Women, Pts. 5 & 6. Before Queen, there was this Flash Gordon album and Alice’s tracks feature players like John Entwistle, Kenney Jones, Nicky Hopkins, Bill Bruford and Keith Moon as “Long John Silver”. “I’m Flash” and “Space Pirates” are mere curiosities, but it’s stuff like this that makes buying a box set so much more worth it. Where else would you hear these tracks? Both feature Alice’s delicious trademark sneer.
Alice’s solo career really began with 1975’s Welcome to My Nightmare. He and Bob Ezrin went all-in with an elaborate horror rock concept album featuring a number of classics. “Welcome to My Nightmare” and “Only Women Bleed” are single versions, and it’s fantastic that the blazing “Escape” was included. Another concept album, Alice Cooper Goes to Hell, was not as strong. Only two tracks are included, but both were singles. “Go to Hell” is a must-have.
The third CD in this box set commences a murky period. Alice was making albums frequently, but they weren’t as well received and many dwell in obscurity. Lace and Whiskey was pretty good, and “It’s Hot Tonight” is a great track to start the disc. Meanwhile, original band members Michael Bruce, Neal Smith and Dennis Dunaway formed the Billion Dollar Babies. They made one album called Battle Axe, and their cool rock track “I Miss You” is included. That’s a nice touch, because for the first seven albums those guys were as important as Vincent Furnier (aka Alice Cooper). Michael Bruce sings, but lead guitarist Glen Buxton was more or less incapacitated by addiction and wasn’t invited. “Battle Axe” sounds like a natural continuation of the Muscle of Love sound. A bunch more rarities are incoming: a torch ballad called “No Time for Tears” (unreleased) and “Because”, the Beatles cover featuring the Bee Gees. This was from that pretty mediocre Sgt. Peppers tribute album from 1978, so it’s great to be able to get it in a box set. Alice’s interpretation is creepy, and the Bee Gees are immaculate.
Moving on to his next solo album, Alice changed direction on From the Inside. He had just gotten out of rehab (an actual mental hospital) and made a concept album with David Foster and Bernie Taupin about the experience. The title track is included as a single version, and you also get the beautifully campy ballad “How You Gonna See Me Now”. It was a single too, and its B-side “No Tricks” is also included. It is a duet with soul singer Betty Wright. Disc three is generous in rarities. Another one called “Road Rats” (produced by Todd Rundgren) is a decent rocker from a movie called Roadies.
Alice moved into the 1980s on Flush the Fashion which employed some new wave and punk influences. Its two best songs, “Clones (We’re All)” and “Pain” are included. 1981 brought Special Forces and more rarities. “Who Do You Think We Are” is a single version, and “Look at You Over There, Ripping the Sawdust from My Teddy Bear” is a synthy unreleased song pulled last minute from the album. Then there is “For Britain Only”, the stripped-back rocker from the EP of the same name. “I Am the Future” is a single version originally from 1982’s Zipper Catches Skin. Completing this era (sometimes called Alice’s “blackout period”) are a pair of tracks from DaDa (1983). Alice had moved as far as he would go into the high-tech synthesizer direction, and he soon cleaned up for good. A couple odds and ends tidy up the tracks from this era. “Identity Crisises” and “See Me in the Mirror” are previously unreleased songs from the Monster Dog movie (1984) which starred Alice. These are very low-fi tracks, but “Identity Crisises” is actually pretty cool.
The final track on the third disc is the first one from Alice’s big comeback period. “Hard Rock Summer” is a fun heavy metal rocker from the Jason Lives soundtrack. It’s cheesy but also previously unavailable. The fourth and final CD picks up there, with two more rarities from the same movie. “He’s Back (The Man Behind the Mask)” is included in demo and movie mix versions. Onto 1986’s Constrictor LP, you get the enjoyable “Teenage Frankenstein”. By 1987 Alice was telling us to Raise Your Fist and Yell on “Freedom”. The excellent “Prince of Darkness” is also from that album, but then there are two more rarities. Alice cut a re-recording of “Under My Wheels” with Axl Rose, Slash and Izzy Stradlin for the movie The Decline of Western Civilization Part 2: The Metal Years. Unlike many re-recordings, this one is well worth it because hey, it’s Guns N’ fuckin’ Roses.
Alice’s sound got slicker moving into the late 80s. “I Got a Line on You” is a Spirit cover from the movie Iron Eagle II. There is a notable shift towards mainstream hard rock, and this spilled over onto the next album Trash (1989). This box set has three songs from Trash, but one is the irritatingly bad title track featuring Jon Bon Jovi. His sound got a little tougher on Hey Stoopid(1991) from which you get a single version of the title track, and “Feed My Frankenstein” (also from Wayne’s World). The Hendrix cover “Fire” is the last song from this period, which was a B-side. Unfortunately another B-side called “It Rained All Night” is a superior song, but not included.
Alice took another short break between albums before emerging in 1994 with another critically acclaimed concept album, The Last Temptation. Alice shed the trappings of the 80s and the album is held in high esteem today as a diverse combination of the 70s and 90s. Three tracks represent it, but it’s hard not to wish “Side Show” was also included.
The Last Temptation was Alice’s last studio album when this box was released in 1999. In the meantime, Alice made friends with Rob Zombie who was obviously influenced by the Coop. They collaborated on a song called “Hands of Death (Burn Baby Burn)” for an X-Files CD. This box set has the unreleased “Spookshow 2000 Mix”. The track points in the direction of Alice’s next album Brutal Planet.
This box set is quite an epic journey, with many facets and side roads. A trip like this needs an appropriate closing, and Rhino did something interesting to do that. They broke the chronological format they used for the majority of the set, and slid in the acoustic rocker “Is Anyone Home?”. This was a studio track included on Alice’s 1997 live album A Fistful of Alice. This serves as the climax, and “Stolen Prayer” from The Last Temptation is the finale. “Stolen Prayer” is a powerful duet with the late Chris Cornell. It was always a perfect closer, but now it’s…also sad.
It should be obvious now that The Life and Crimes of Alice Cooper is a worthwhile box set even for fans who own every album. The wealth of rarities are just a taste, but they certainly scratch a lot of track off of collector’s lists. Many remain exclusive to this box set. On top of that, it is simply a good listen, bumpy start aside.
One of the great Unplugged albums of all time…isn’t even an “official” Unplugged album. That would be Tesla’s spontaneously released Five Man Acoustical Jam from 1990. Its hit single “Signs” absolutely helped set up the MTV Unplugged revolution.
With no intention of creating a live album, Tesla played a few acoustic gigs on off days and then recorded the Philly show for the archives. However a radio station in Boston started playing an acoustic rendition of “Signs” and plans were put in motion to capitalize. Thus Five Man Acoustical Jam came to be, a highlight of the Tesla catalogue that was almost completely unplanned.
“We’re just fuckin’ around tonight!” says singer Jeff Keith before “Heaven’s Trail”. Well then Tesla should spend more time fucking around. The looseness of the songs was so fresh for 1990. Tesla rolled the hits: “Modern Day Cowboy”, “Gettin’ Better”, “The Way it Is”, and of course “Love Song”, the only one with an electric solo. But because they were “just fuckin’ around”, there are also some very interesting covers: Beatles, Stones, the Dead, CCR and of course the Five Man Electrical Band. Tesla’s version of “We Can Work it Out” is awesome and incredibly fun. Less so with the Stones’ “Mother’s Little Helper” which is an unusually structured song to start with. “Lodi” by CCR was custom made for Tesla. “Signs”, of course what the smartest cover song decision the band ever made.
Five Man Acoustical Jam is a live album held in high esteem, for many good reasons.
1. A great selection of original material (old and brand new) that worked well in the acoustic format.
2. Choice covers.
3. Terrific recording, and 100% live with no fixes or overdubs.
4. Expert musicianship.
5. Humour.
Frank Zappa asked “Does humour belong in music?” The answer is “Sometimes”! One of those times is a loose, fun acoustic show. They could get away with playing a joke track like “Tommy’s Down Home”, written and sung by guitarist Tommy Skeoch. “I’d like to cut the balls off a long-haired hippie, and tie them up to a tree,” he sings gleefully.
The one single was the smash hit “Signs”, and it had a non-album B-side. “Little Suzi” (also a cover, but an earlier one) might be from the same gig. Jeff’s voice is shredded on this one, but it’s hella cool.
It’s probably fair to say that Tesla are underrated. They get stuck on tours with bands like Poison, who have nothing to do with the rootsy rock that Tesla has on offer. Tesla are better than that, and Five Man Acoustical Jam is actually a bit of an essential classic to own. The irony is that Tesla’s most definitive live album is the one that was basically a fluke!
Animalize: a huge hit not proportional to the quality of the songs inside. It went platinum on the strength of lead single “Heaven’s On Fire”, but going deeper into the record, Kiss did not have the goods this time.
New guitarist Mark St. John (formerly Mark Norton) replaced the fired Vinnie Vincent, and in doing so, continued Kiss’ quest for shreddery dominance. In the 80s you had to have an Eddie Van Halen or Yngwie Malmsteen to get noticed, or so it seemed, and that was what Kiss went for. In the meantime, Gene Simmons was off in Hollywood leaving Paul Stanley to do handle Kiss, something Paul eventually came to resent.
Paul Stanley re-teamed with his songwriting buddy Desmond Child. Their last collaboration was 1979’s disco hit “I Was Made For Lovin’ You” from Dynasty. The partnership struck gold a second time with “Heaven’s On Fire”, a simple song perfectly suited for the Kiss of the 80s and beyond. Paul Stanley’s “Woo-ooo-ooo-ooo-OOOOO-ooo” intro is legendary and truthfully a song like “Heaven’s On Fire” isn’t too far removed from classic Kiss. Paul’s sassy delivery is enviable.
Desmond Child also co-wrote the opening number “I’ve Had Enough (Into the Fire)”. As the 80s began, Kiss seemed determined to write fast songs for their albums. Very fast songs. “I’ve Had Enough” is one of those, and it’s a good one too, though it was rarely played in concert. You’d never guess Desmond was involved without reading the credits, but you’d also not imagine it was Kiss if it wasn’t Paul singing.
Another fine Paul song called “Get All You Can Take” is a co-write with Mitch Weissman whose name has repeatedly popped up on Kiss credits over the years. This slow paced sleazy rocker has one of the few Kiss f-bombs in the chorus: “What fucking difference does it make?” Mark St. John’s solo is a blazing showcase of different tricks and techniques, but it suits the song rather awkwardly like an ill fitting tux. Such was the problem with a jazz-influenced shredder in Kiss.
Another fast number is “Under the Gun” written by Paul, Desmond and drummer Eric Carr. This one was played frequently on the Animalize tour though there are better songs. Fluttery guitars sound like laser beams zipping back and forth. Carr kicks ass, but it’s not a great track. Paul gets in a cute double entendre though: “There’s no speed limit where I’m coming from…let’s hit the highway doing 69!”
The final Paul song is probably the best one, although he has since criticized it as not good enough. “Thrills in the Night”, co-written with Jean Beauvoir, deserves praise. Sometimes the artist is their own worst critic, but “Thrills in the Night” is awesome, dramatic Kiss rock. The chorus goes on for weeks and the soloing fits.
If Animalize was a Paul Stanley solo EP, there would be enough good songs to give it a passing grade. However…we have the Gene Simmons songs.
Animalize shall forever be cursed as the album with the lyric, “I wanna put my log in your fireplace.” Yes, the man who once wrote a song with Bob Dylan also wrote a ditty called “Burn Bitch Burn”. The riff is awesome. It has its moments. It’s also undeniably one of Gene’s worst lyrics, and that is saying something. The song also sounds unfinished, as if he said, “OK good enough, onto the next song.” Fortunately Mark St. John’s solo playing is awesome, though not especially accessible. And that’s Gene’s best song on the album.
Gene’s other songs are “Lonely is the Hunter”, “While the City Sleeps” and “Murder in High Heels”. Of these, “Lonely is the Hunter” is by far the best. A slow sleazy groove is more up Kiss’ alley than these fast speed rockers. All three of these songs have one quality in common with “Burn Bitch Burn”, and that is that they sound like rough ideas gone unfinished. Animalize was produced by Paul (with a co-producer credit for Gene). A Kiss producer like Bob Ezrin likely would have told Gene to go back and come up with better material. The most interesting thing about “Lonely is the Hunter” and “Murder in High Heels” is the solo work. It’s stellar. It’s not overdone. It’s melodic and memorable. And it’s…familiar. Future Kiss guitarist Bruce Kulick stepped in to play ghost guitar on these songs.
The trend of Kiss using uncredited outside musicians was growing. Allan Schwartzberg (who also played on The Elder) did drum overdubs. Jean Beauvoir played bass on “Under the Gun”. Gene played the rhythm guitars on his own songs. That’s why the credits on Kiss albums always simply state: KISS – and the names of the members.
Gene cut his hair short for a movie called Runaway. He starred as the villain (of course) Dr. Luther, opposite Tom Selleck. Kirstie Alley was in it, and it was written and directed by Michael Crichton. Considering the year and the names involved, this was a fairly high profile role. Gene went for it, and has since admitted his brain wasn’t in Kiss at the time. The wig he wore on stage with the band made him look silly, and new fans considered Paul the singer and Gene a secondary guy. Gene’s songs weren’t singles anymore. They weren’t being played live. “Burn Bitch Burn” was only ever played once! These were all clues as to what was going on behind the scenes. Paul was sailing the ship now. He had no choice. Animalize suffers for it. Gene is to blame for his own downfall during the period and has since gracefully accepted that.
The Animalize tour was the biggest Kiss had done since the glory years, but troubles began early. Mark St. John couldn’t play. He was diagnosed with an arthritic condition called Reiter’s Syndrome. His hands swelled up and he simply could not do the gig. Mark passed away in 2007, but suggested that the arthritis may have been triggered by stress. The aforementioned Bruce Kulick stepped in to take his place, and did so with professionalism and respect. He got along with everyone. He was willing to learn. He was a great fit. The first great fit in many years.
The Animalize period put Kiss on MTV and on back the radio again, but its success was vastly disproportional to its quality.
Today’s rating:
2/5 stars
Uncle Meat’s rating:
2/5 steaks
Meat’s slice:There really isn’t much to say here. “Heaven’s on Fire” is a good song that I still enjoy hearing. Everything else is OK at best and non-essential. “Burn Bitch Burn” might have some of the worst lyrics of all time.
RICH ROBINSON – Got to Get Better in a Little While (2016 Universal 10″ clear single for Record Store Day)
This really pretty record (a single or an EP, who cares?) was found on the Taranna 2016 expedition with Mr. Books. It’s apparently a Record Store Day exclusive from April 2016, although I had no problem getting this one for $16.99 in October. This my first purchase of anything by Rich without his brother Chris. Knowing the Black Crowes, I was fairly certain it wouldn’t suck. I was still surprise to see on the back, an ad for not one not two not three but FOUR Rich Robinson “Expanded Editions” on CD and LP! Who knew? Not this guy!
“Got to Get Better in a Little While” is a Derek and the Dominoes cover, apparently one that Crowes used to do regularly, as does Rich. You have to hear this if you like bluesy rock that produces pure smoke from sheer musical chemistry. Yes, Clapton is God and the original can’t be touched, but a real jackass could easily make this song sound like shit. Rich does the opposite, and it sounds as part of his musical being. There’s some deep bass that just cuts through, and this goes on for eight and a half minutes of jam session heaven. Just bop along.
The second side has two Rich originals. Greasy late night blues is on the menu. “Look Through My Window” sets a scene of steamy Tennessee dusk. Brilliant stuff for any fan of slippery slidey guitars. Then an acoustic/electric tune called “Falling Away” closes on a first light of a quiet dawn. Great tunes, both, making up a tidy little 16 minute EP. Or single. Whatever!
The vinyl itself is clear and thick. The package doesn’t say anything about clear vinyl, but you almost expect clear or coloured when you buy these limited editions. It looks lovely spinning with its green label. Great little EP, reasonably priced for the collector and fan.
Ozzy Osbourne has done lots and lots of tours since his “No More Tours Tour”. It seemed special at the time, because we thought Live & Loud was going to be the last live album. It was not. What was supposed to be a definitive and indispensable capstone is just another live album, only really notable for its packaging.
Let’s start there. If you buy this album, don’t buy the remastered edition in the jewel case. This album didn’t need remastering a couple years later. Why would it? Instead search for the original digipack with the metal speaker grille cover. Finding one in good shape can be a challenge. Unfortunately, the metal grille is not removable although the VHS release did have a removable grille. The release also came with two Ozzy “temporary tattoos” on little 2″ x 2″ sheets of paper. These are the first things to get lost and you might want to consider that you’ll never find them.
Live & Loud scores an A+ for packaging, but gets mediocre grades for the music. This is patched together from a variety of recordings, and it sounds like a lot of fixing was done after the fact. It’s bogged down with over-long guitar and drum solos (Zakk Wylde and Randy Castillo) and too much talking. There is only so much that one needs to be told to “go fucking crazy”. Ozzy proclaims that he loves us so often that it loses all meaning. He’s more of a cheerleader than a singer at times, constantly badgering the crowd to get “louder”! There is also an annoyingly long intro that means nothing without the visual accompaniment that’s supposed to go with it. I will admit that my buddy Peter and I were amused when Ozzy said “Let me see your fucking cigarette lighters” during “Mr. Crowley”.
On the plus side, this particular lineup of Ozzy’s band was one of his strongest. Zakk and Randy were joined by bassist Mike Inez who was invited to join Alice in Chains in 1993. Another plus is the presence of Black Sabbath. The second to last song is “Black Sabbath”, performed by the original Black Sabbath, at the final show on the tour. Fans will recall that Sabbath were touring their incredible Dehumanizer album, which frankly blows away Ozzy’s No More Tears. When Sabbath (then including Tony Iommi, Geezer Butler, Vinny Appice and Ronnie James Dio) were asked to open for Ozzy at his final two concerts, Dio bailed. He was replaced for those shows by a little known metal singer named Rob Halford. At the last of the two shows, the original Black Sabbath featuring Ozzy Osbourne, Tony Iommi, Geezer Butler and Bill Ward reunited to play a three song set. It was their first time together since Live Aid in 1985.
Unfortunately, a couple tracks aside, Live & Loud is flat and uninspired. “Black Sabbath” isn’t brilliant but at least it’s historic. All the important songs are there, with maybe a few too many from No More Tears. There is one surprise in “Changes”, the old Sabbath classic. This is performed by Zakk on piano and Ozzy. It’s brilliant and was used as the single. “Mr. Crowley”, “Shot in the Dark” and “Desire” are pretty good, but drummer Randy Castillo was killing it. He was the perfect drummer for that band. Rest in peace Randy.
Live & Loud is for the serious fan only, who will really want to get the grille cover. Live & Loud is not consistent enough for the average listener and gets bogged down in spots making it a very long run.
AMERICAN DAD! – “My Morning Straitjacket” (Episode 7, season 5)
Has Stan gone too far this time? Daughter Hayley has gone to a rock concert! According to a furious Stan, rock concerts are “the devil’s music! It’s the number one cause of school violence, teen pregnancy and leather pants!” But My Morning Jacket are “awesome” according to Hayley, and she plans on going again the next night, until Stan confiscates the tickets!
Fortunately for Hayley, mom Francine understands rock and roll. She used to get backstage the hard way, not like today with those sissy radio giveaways. She secretly returns the tickets to Hayley, infuriating Stan. Using his CIA noise-cancelling earplugs, he goes to the concert to “rescue” his daughter. “Idiots! Paying good money to hear something they already heard on a record!” But when he removes his special earplugs, he hears the music…and finally feels something! Where Stan used to feel only anger, he now feels everything!
Jim James has an “angelic” voice according to Stan. “He makes Enya sound like a Russian couple arguing at the bowling alley!” He can’t get enough. “I want to hear all their music! Right now!” This leads to an unhealthy obsession with the band, accompanied by a smorgasbord of their songs: “Wordless Chorus”, “Touch Me I’m Going To Scream (Part 2)”, “I’m Amazed”, “Remnants”, “Highly Suspicious”, and “Phone Went West”. The animation for Stan’s musical fantasy sequence is suitably trippy. Stan flies through space carried by owls, with My Morning Jacket singer Jim James riding on his back! As usual for Stan, his obsessive behaviour leads to neglect for his family and job. Something has to be done! The final straw is when Stan spends $900 on a bootleg CD of Jim James gargling in the bathroom before a show.
Stan is under the delusion that he and Jim James are soul mates, so Roger the alien comes up with a plan. Dressed as his groupie persona Abbey Road (“I’m Abbey Road, and when it snows I need to be plowed!”) they go to follow My Morning Jacket and meet Jim James. When they finally encounter James in person, he convinces Stan that he already has a real soul mate — his wife Francine.
The music of My Morning Jacket is diverse and entertaining, and although their softer moments are a bit limp, when they rock they rock. As for this episode? It rocks.
was never enough for Gene Simmons. Dating Cher and Diana Ross gave him a taste of Hollywood stardom. He saw movies as his next mountain to climb. Gene secured an audition with novelist and sometimes director Michael Crichton. Crichton asked Gene to communicate, without saying any words, his desire to kill him. Whatever Gene did worked, and he scored the role without even having to read for it.
You must be logged in to post a comment.