music

REVIEW: Sony Walkman NWZ-E353

This is an old review, but I thought it relevant to post, because of the way that the Sony Walkman changed my music listening habits.

IMG_20140615_080150SONY Walkman NWZ-E353

For years, I had avoided going digital. I had an old iPod. The little one with no screen. It was awful. Syncing with iTunes? Why can’t it be simpler? When I listen to a CD, I drop it in and push “play”. No syncing, no trying to understand iTunes. That kind of simplicity is what I’m looking for. Then I had another iPod, a Mini, which was even worse; the battery was useless and it couldn’t power up. Plus iTunes is just awful, I don’t care what the Apple fanatics say. It’s not an intuitive program in the least. Why can’t it be easier?

I decided to pick this Sony Walkman up and I’m glad I did. It has revolutionized the way I listen to music. Before I had gotten to the point where I was only listening to music on CD in the car and occasionally at home when Mrs. LeBrain was out shopping. Now, I can have music going almost anytime I want, morning noon and night.

And it’s easy! Drag and drop! How much simpler can you get? Because I’m a bit OCD, when I rip a CD I edit my ID3 tags to get the cover art going and make sure the tracks are in the right order and so on. But it’s so easy, and I’d do anything to avoid having to use iTunes.

I don’t even care about the 4 meg size on this model. When the player gets full, I just delete some albums that I’ve played enough, and add some more from my computer.  Drag and drop. Easy! I rip my CDs to the highest quality MP3 possible, so I really only get about 25 albums on here at a time. But that’s plenty — when am I going to be away from my computer long enough to listen to 25 albums? It’s never happened. I’d have to charge it first anyway. Maybe I’ll upgrade one day to a player with bigger storage, but I don’t see the point right now.

IMG_20140615_080220The only modification I did was to buy some better, more comfortable ear buds. I’ve been through a few different pairs. With that combination, I have the best quality portable music that I need. I also bought some portable speakers but they go largely unused. I prefer to plug my player into the AUX IN jack of a stereo, and I’m off to the races.

The Walkman has some customization available, such as wallpaper, photo galleries, etc. It has this thing called “SensMe”…it’s supposed to pick music based on moods. I could care less, I don’t listen to random songs, I listen to albums. I prefer to listen to songs in the context in which they were meant to be listened to. There’s a fine sounding FM radio as well. There’s a video player but it seems to be quite finicky as to what type of files it will play, so I don’t use that feature. I had no desire to, anyway.

Battery life is excellent. It has battery saving software as well. I can listen to music all week, as often as I can squeeze it in, and only charge it once a week. It is charged with the included USB cable. Easy, easy, easy.

Whether I am listening to heavy rock, classical music, country, or jazz, I have had no issues at all with the sound quality. For example right now I am listening to Ryan Adams’ Demolition album. The bass frequencies are strong but the clarity of the acoustic guitar is stunning! The only music that suffers is live music. As you know with a live album you have the continual backdrop of crowd noise. An MP3 player places a split-second pause between every song, which goes unnoticed on studio albums. On live albums, it breaks up the crowd noise slightly and can be distracting. Not a huge deal, but I aim to be complete in my reviews.

So, enjoy this awesome MP3 player. Here are my 5 basic tips to the best listening experiences!

1. Rip your CDs to the highest possible quality. Don’t download.
2. Grab a free ID3 tag editor for maximum enjoyment — add cover art, correct spelling mistakes or track order.
3. Buy a good pair of comfortable earbuds to maximize the sound quality.
4. Use the battery saving software.
5. Throw out your iPod.

Enjoy!

5/5 stars

Part 298: Why I Couldn’t Give You A Quote Over the Phone

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RECORD STORE TALES Part 298:
Why I Couldn’t Give You A Quote Over the Phone

 

We advertised that we paid cash or credit for used CDs.  A lot of customers used to call with the titles of their CDs, to get a quote over the phone for selling them.  “Hey, I have 30 CDs here to sell, if I read off the titles, can you tell me what you’ll pay me for them?”

The answer was no, for a number of good reasons.  For us, buying used CDs wasn’t a science.  We tried to create a system as best we could, but there were so many variables.  In addition, a lot of the process is subjective.  I’ll try to help you understand.

First and foremost – quality.  We were exceptionally picky about all discs that we bought.  If the disc was scuffed, we could buff certain scratches out.  (Not top scratches and pinholes though!  They are a whole other chapter to the story.)  A lot of customers would call and say, “My discs are all mint.”  Well, I found that for some, “mint” had a broad definition.  It could mean anything to brand-new to scratched like a hockey rink.  If a customer said “mint” you couldn’t go by that.  Likewise with “they all play fine.”  Until I look at it, I don’t know if it’s in a condition good enough to sell to my customers.  You probably have your own standards regarding CDs you want to keep in your collection.

But there’s more to quality than just the CD itself.  Is the front cover present?  How about the back?  A lot of customers discarded the back covers, in order to store their discs in those stupid travel wallets.  Bad idea, since those wallets scratch up CDs, sometimes beyond repair.  Not to mention, we wouldn’t take a CD missing its back cover.  Maybe the front cover is also water damaged – we couldn’t take a CD when the pages of the book were stuck together like a teenager’s Playboy mag.  That happened a lot more often then you might expect.

When it came down to the pricing of the CD, we had a lot of additional factors to consider.   How much do we sell it for?  How many copies do we have?  Do any of our other stores need a copy?  It is rare, or scarce to find used?  For example, Pink Floyd’s Dark Side of the Moon was not a rare CD, but it was hard to find copies used in good condition.  I’d be interested in paying more for Dark Side of the Moon than I would Van Halen’s Balance, even if we sold them both for the same price.

Let’s say you’re an annoying customer, and you called my store looking for a price quote.  Let’s say the person answering the phone forgot the rules, and gave you a quote over the phone.  Then when you actually come in to sell them, I’m working instead, not the person who gave you the price quote.  So imagine that scenario.

You come in and I start going through the discs.  Immediately, you’re pissed off that I’m passing on that scratched up Metallica CD that somebody quoted you $5 for.  The reason?  A hard-to-spot top scratch that cannot be fixed.  Or a missing back cover.  Or a deep scratch I can feel with my fingernail.  Or perhaps I could take it, but I need to have the scratches buffed out and I can only pay you $2-3.

Then next up, you have a Guess Who Greatest Hits.  When you called for your quote, I had none in stock.  Now I have two.  (It happens!)  So I can’t give you what the other person quoted, because now I have two copies and I don’t need it as badly.

Finally, let’s say you were quoted that you were going to get $3 for your Hanson CD.  The person you spoke to on the phone saw that we didn’t have any Hanson in stock.  However, I know that is an unusual happenstance and we always have tons of Hanson everywhere.  I might pay a buck where somebody else offered you $3, because I know better.  Them’s the breaks, right?

This doesn’t even account for other stupid things that can happen.  For example, a customer saying to you that he has Metallica Garage Days when he actually has Garage Inc.  Basically if you could think of a way information could be miscommunicated over the phone, it happened.

Customers seldom understood.  “I don’t want to come all the way down there unless I know I’m going to get good money for these discs.”  Unfortunately, coming down there was the only way.  No ifs, ands, buts, or exceptions.  People sucked sometimes.

Part 296: Four Musical Child Names

RECORD STORE TALES Part 296:
Four Musical Child Names

Some parents choose regrettable names for their children. None of the names below were intrinsically bad, except perhaps in the case of the former Nirvana fan.  Here are four names from children I met in the record store days, and the music that inspired them…

1. Kurdt

KURDT

 

The girl with the toddler named Kurdt was selling off her entire Nirvana collection.  Regrets?  Nah!

2. Lars

Metallica drummer Lars Ulrich.

 

Absolutely hilarious to see a long-haired dad with a Metallica shirt on yelling at his rat-tailed kid:  “Lars!  Stop that!”

 

3. Sebastian

SEB

 

My old customer Gord named his son after the Canadian god of rock.

4. Rhiannon

FLEETWOOD

A mom was in looking for Fleetwood Mac.  “Tell the man your name!” she said to the little girl with her.  With a beaming smile she said, “RHIANNON!  Not Rihanna!  RHIANNON!”

QUIZ WINNER! Lego Album Covers 2

We have a winner in the Lego Album Covers 2 contest!  As promised, the winner gets my eternal respect and a shout-out.  The winner is…

LEMON KURRI KLOPEK!

Who successfully named all five albums –

  1. White Lion – Big Game
  2. Marillion – The Thieving Magpie (La Gazza Ladra)
  3. Mad Season – Above
  4. Nine Inch Nails – Ghosts I-IV
  5. The Beatles – Yesterday and Today (butcher cover)

I had a complaint of “fixing” from somebody, but I won’t mention their name number!

Congrats to Mike aka Lemon Kurri Klopek who now has my eternal respect.

LKK

REVIEW: Poison – Hollyweird (2002)

Dedicated to Iron Tom Sharpe, who doesn’t understand that sometimes you just have to blow off steam and review a shitty album.


POISON – Hollyweird (2002 Cyanide Music)

I have a soft spot for Poison, and I have every album. Every album that is, except Hollyweird. After several spins in-store, I realized this was never an album I was going to listen to again. (Although I did, for this review actually — you’re welcome.)  Let’s face it, a “classic Poison lineup” reunion is not exactly earthshaking, especially when they traded down a true maestro in Blues Saraceno for CC to return. Not to mention Richie Kotzen before him.  CC will never be classified as a guitar hero. It’s CC’s songwriting that he brings to the Poison table, that and some sloppily good rhythms. However Poison’s songwriting on Hollyweird is much like the production values — flat and dull.

13 songs clocking in at just over 40 minutes, this is a collection of short pop rockers and ballads. The cover of “Squeeze Box” is pretty putrid, and Who fans would cringe if they happened upon it.  Most of the originals are just plain dull, lacking the bombast, hooks, flash and excitement of any previous Poison album, Native Tongue included. If only Poison could have continued along the lines that they were pursuing with Crack A Smile, or even re-recorded it with CC. Alas, this is the worst of all Poison studio albums, and it was such a lame duck that the band never recorded another one (as of 2014, this is the most recent Poison studio album aside from the covers-only Poison’d).

The opening and riff to “Hollyweird” is pretty decent, but the song itself is pretty suck-tastic.  Maybe I should take back what I said about CC.  He’s the only good thing about this song.  “Shooting Star” (a supposed sequel to “Fallen Angel”) is annoyingly bass heavy, and Bobby Dall ain’t that great a bassist.  CC’s riff is the only good thing about it, since the chorus is drowned out in mush.  Thom Panuzio isn’t a hack producer by any stretch, but he didn’t even show up on Hollyweird.  Then, somebody thought it would be a good idea to let CC DeVille sing lead on “Emperor’s New Clothes”.  The sad thing is it’s one of the better songs (even though it sounds more like Sum 41 than Poison).  CC sings three songs on Hollyweird, but who cares?

Lowlights:  Stinky “Squeeze Box,” whack “Wishful Thinkin’,” generic “Get Ya Some,” dull “Devil Woman,” horrible “Home”…or should I say “Homes,” since both Bret and CC have their own versions of this pop-punk wannabe? (In a row!)

Highlights:  “Wasteland,” maybe.

Tired, dull, derivative…pick your adjective.

1/5 stars

  1. “Hollyweird” – 3:15
  2. “Squeeze Box” – 2:32 (The Who cover)
  3. “Shooting Star” – 4:39
  4. “Wishful Thinkin'” – 2:49
  5. “Get ‘Ya Some” – 4:22
  6. “Emperor’s New Clothes” – 2:15
  7. “Devil Woman” – 3:47
  8. “Wasteland” – 3:56
  9. “Livin’ In The Now” – 2:37
  10. “Stupid, Stoned & Dumb” – 3:10
  11. “Home” (Bret’s Story) – 2:49
  12. “Home” (C.C.’s Story) – 2:47
  13. “Rockstar” – 3:33

Part 286: Live! Bootlegs

Part one of a two-part series on bootlegs.

RECORD STORE TALES Part 286: Live! Bootlegs

In the 1990’s, T-Rev befriended a bootlegger named Ralph. I personally purchased from Ralph a Queensryche show that I had attended (and reviewed)  It was a VHS copy of the last date on the Promised Land tour in 1995. Trevor purchased live tapes from him as well. They were usually single-camera, audience filmed videos. Long before Youtube came along, it was the only way you could get videos of shows from bands you liked. Ralph charged between $15 and $20 for his bootleg videos. We even saw him at a Kiss show, covertly filming.

VHS was the common format, usually fuzzy with shitty sound.  I bought a few shows from Ralph of varying quality; thankfully the Queensryche show was watchable enough.  It was a single camera, and unfortunately the beginning of “Take Hold of the Flame” was cut off.  Still, it was a great memento of the Promise Land tour.


A lot has changed since the 1990’s. Youtube has made great vintage concert footage easily accessible for anyone. New concert footage? Usually up later that night or the next day, unless the record labels try to take it down. Regardless, unless you are hunting for a specific show, chances are Youtube have concert footage of just about every band you like, for free.  They do not have footage of the Toronto Queensryche show I saw in ’95, for example, but there are plenty of videos from that tour out there for free.

Bootleg CDs? Same deal. You can find a seemingly infinite amount of concerts online.  I would never purchase a burned bootleg CD anymore. I only collect factory pressed bootleg CDs, which are still being made. They’re a lot harder to come by, because again, most people can download mp3 files from any live show you can think of, for free. If they feel like burning them to a CD they can, or just keep ‘em on the computer or iPod. Hell, way back in the late 1990’s, our own CD stores were selling burned live bootlegs. I never liked doing that but it wasn’t my choice.  (We didn’t make them; we bought them in huge numbers from a customer.)

Above is an actual CD that we sold in-store.  This is one of only two times I bought a burned CD for myself.  We stickered this one at $19.99, and we put a label on it that said “live import” so we didn’t have to use the word “bootleg”.

When I attended the the Toronto Musical Collectibles Record & CD Sale last week, I was pleased to find lots of new factory pressed bootleg CDs.  I’m glad that industry is still alive somewhere in Europe.  I was surprised to see burned bootleg CDs and DVDs for sale, still. In this day and age? There is no way I could pay anyone even $5 for a burned bootleg CD. I saw many: Tori Amos’ first album, Y Kant Tori Read, is one of the most heavily bootlegged albums in my experience, and I saw a burned copy for $5. No thanks. T-Rev found a burned copy of Kim Mitchell’s first solo EP. No thanks!  If you can’t find or afford an original copy, it’s all online.  Just burn, print some cover art on your Epson and you’re off to the races, right?

Ralph was still there, now selling shows on DVD.  The one he was showing was still just concert footage from a single audience camera. I couldn’t have justified paying $15 for a burned DVD of that. (Some vendors were even selling bootleg Blu-rays.)  Truthfully, I was very surprised.  I thought something like that had little monetary value to anyone in 2014.

At least the tables and tables of burned bootleggers were easy to skip, so I could concentrate on better finds. On the drive home, Trevor and I pondered, how could Ralph stay in business? Who would pay good money for a burned CD or DVD bootleg? Times have certainly changed.

Would you pay $15 for a burned DVD bootleg of your favourite band? Under what circumstances? Or, would you save your money and just download?  Leave a comment and discuss!

MET3

Part 281: People of Walmart

RECORD STORE TALES Part 281:  People of Walmart

You know what I really hated?  (No, really this time!)  Customers who went out of their way to tell us that Walmart or Future Shop or Best Buy had something cheaper.  Much of the time, the customer wasn’t looking for a better deal on a CD.  They just seemed to relish letting me know that somebody else in town had a cheaper price.  Most of the time, I couldn’t have matched a rival’s prices anyway.  Big box stores’ prices were often below our cost, because of the sheer quantities they purchased.  Or, they sold a CD below their cost as a “loss leader” – getting somebody in the store to buy the new Backstreet Boys and taking a loss on it in hopes that they also buy other stuff.

I remember one obnoxious lady, in the store with her three kids.

“Do you know that Walmart has your Backstreet Boys CD there for $3 less than you have it?  HAH!”

Really?  You needed to throw that “HAH!” there at the end?

BINGO

Play with friends!

The truth was, I couldn’t have cared less.  We had a pricing structure that allowed us to be competitive with other record stores.  Walmart have it for $3 less?  Then buy it at Walmart.  I’m not going to be able to compete with them on the price of the new Backstreet Boys CD.  Also, those big release sales were generally just for the first few days of release.  By the weekend, their prices would be closer to ours.

Essentially we only carried new stock so we’d have those titles when customers asked for them.  We made all the money on the used stock and accessories.  If a customer came into my store and bought the new Backstreet Boys, great.  If they came into the store looking for the new Backstreet Boys but also bought two or three used CDs with it, then that’s what we were aiming for.  Sometimes we tried the “hard sell” at the cash register.  “Now don’t forget to stock up on blank CDs and CD cleaner while you’re here!  We have this CD cleaner for $5.99.”

You want cheap new releases?  Great!  Who doesn’t?  If that’s what you’re after then by all means, go to Walmart.  But if you wanted fair prices, lots of used CD selection instead of all the new releases, knowledgeable staff and a more personal touch than Walmart?  Come to us.  Put your name on a waiting list for a used copy of the new Backstreet Boys.  When it comes in, it’ll be cheaper than Walmart’s new copies.  As an added bonus you don’t have to look at the “People of Walmart” or be treated to their impersonal style.  Not good enough?  Then support Walmart and big megacorporations.  No skin off my sack!

Part 275: Catharis (Second Anniversary special)

MIKELADANOMikeladano.com celebrates its second anniversary today!  It started with Record Store Tales Part 1, and here we are at Part 275!  (That’s one tale every 2.65 days for the numbers-oriented out there.)  A huge THANK-YOU to everyone who’ve read my stuff; as David Lee Roth says, “It ain’t no fuckin’ good without an audience.”  I also need to thank those friends that read this stuff years ago and told me to keep writing — they know who they are.   And my family, but especially the lovely Mrs. LeBrain who lets me rock and roll all nite and part of every day.  I love you sweety.

Enjoy this Record Store Tale!

RECORD STORE TALES Part 275:  Catharsis

Sometimes when I hit these milestones, I like to reflect on where I’ve been and where I’m headed.  Two years ago when I began publishing the Record Store Tales I didn’t know if anyone would read it.  I was pleased to find that enough people enjoyed reading these stories that it was worth continuing.

I knew when I started posting these that eventually, inevitably, somebody from the old record store would find them.  I made the decision to write under my real name, not a pseudonym.  I anticipated that while some of my old friends would be entertained by these stories, some would not.  I took efforts to protect the identities of the characters in the story that are not portrayed in a positive light.

I did a “soft” launch of the site.  That is, I began publishing the stories one chapter at a time, but I kept it to myself and a close circle of friends.  The response was very positive and constructive.  While some friends urged me to “keep it short”, one of the most popular earlier stories was one of the longest.  Part 16: Traveling Man was the story of a long misadventure in Oakville Ontario, climaxed by an encounter with an unpleasant lawyer customer.  One friend told me the story was “fucking hilarious” and that he anticipated from the start that the guy in the story was a lawyer.   This feedback encouraged me to keep going for it.  I was fired up.

Then once I had enough content up to give people something substantial to read, I did my “official” launch via Facebook, Twitter and email.  It didn’t take long for the rain to hit my parade.  As I anticipated some people from the store didn’t like my stories, but Spoogecakes was the only one to publicly voice her disgust, way back in Part 35.5.  The funny thing about this was that I hadn’t planned on even mentioning Spoogecakes in my story, but then she went and wrote herself in.  Oh well.

I never could have done a white-washed version of the Record Store Tales.  I tried.  Seven or eight years ago I tried something called “Record Store-ies” (lame title, I know).  Some of the “Record Store-ies” got recycled into the old Klassic Kwotes, but it wasn’t the satisfying, cathartic experience that my soul had been craving.  After the Spoogecakes shit-storm, I approached a mentor of mine about the situation.  I asked him if I had been too negative in the past, if I should have toned it down.  His response to me was something I have taken to heart ever since.

“If you compromise your art in order to please a small minority of people no matter how vocal, you will ultimately end up with a piece of art that you don’t like.”

That was great advice.  My bottom line is always, “Do I like it?”  I’ve tried to maintain a balance.  There are stories about people with whom I conflicted, but there are also stories about things like me shitting my pants in the store.   And I didn’t give myself an alias for these stories!

This isn’t just storytelling to me.  This is catharsis.  While I was experiencing everything I experienced in the record store, good or bad, I held tight to one thought.  That thought was, “When this is all over, at least I will have a bunch of great stories to share.  If I can entertain just a few people with these stories then it’s all been worth it.”   Spoogecakes commented that there are “two sides to every story”.

That’s right.  And this is mine.

Part 274: The Hawks

Eric Singer: The Hawk?

RECORD STORE TALES Part 274:  The Hawks

Everybody hates aspects of their jobs. One that I…well, I didn’t hate it, but I disliked it…was buying used CDs off customers. For every one person that came in with a bag or box of treasure, were five assholes with shit. But there were many “types” of sellers. Some sample negative “seller types” that I could see on any given day included:

“What’s ‘The Hawk'” you ask? I’m glad you inquired. The Hawk was among the most annoying type of customer you could find. I’m going to re-create a sample interaction with a Hawk-type for you. I call them Hawks because they watched us like hawks. Sometimes they’d just sit there and watch silently, but the worst Hawks were the talkative ones.

Hawk: “Hey how’s it going. I got what you’re looking for.”

Me: “Oh yeah what do you have?”

Hawk: “Used CDs that’s what! Got a whole bunch for you in this box. So how does this work? $5 each?”

Me: “Well, what happens is I go through them, check them for scratches, and then I’ll figure out prices for each one. I base that on how many we have in stock, the condition of the CD, what it sells for, and so on. So if you’d like to take a look around, give me about 15-20 minutes to do that.”

Hawk: “No that’s OK, I’ll hang here for a bit.”

Me: “OK.”

I’d start going through the discs, taking each one out, checking the playing surface. It’s sometimes a long process. You had to keep an eye on the packaging as well, so many people sold CDs with the wrong discs inside. If I bought one like that, I’d be responsible for my mistake monetarily. The talkative Hawks would question every single move.

SILKHawk: “What’s that pile? Is that for all country CDs?”

Me: “No…that’s the pile that’s in good shape.”

Hawk: “Then what are those piles?”

Me: “Those are ones I’m passing on.”

Hawk: “What for? Those are good CDs. There’s some old Boz Scaggs in there. He’s hard to find.”

Me: “Some of them are just a tad too scratched for me to take. But if you give me some time I’ll get myself organized here and then I can explain what I’ve done.”

Hawk: “Nah I like watching. Now that CD there, that’s a double.”

Me: “Yes, I know. I’ve seen this album a few times.”

Hawk: “And that one there? That’s an import. Guy at HMV charged me $30 for that thing, and it only has the one good song! You’re gonna give me at least $10 for it right?”

Me: “Well, I can tell you right now I can’t give you $10, but I haven’t priced any of these yet so I’m not quite there.”

Hawk: “That one’s good. You ever heard of this guy before?”

Me: “Pat Travers? Yes.”

Hawk: “Really? Where’s a young guy like you hear of Pat Travers?”

Me: “I’m 30.”

You guys think I’m making this up? Hell no! Maybe not all in one conversation, but these are all things that have been said to me by various Hawks over the years! Anyway at this point I could end up with a dozen piles of CDs in front of me.

Me: “OK, so what we have here are all CDs that have minor blemishes on them. I can take them but for a little less because we have to get them polished up. So from left to right I can give you $1 each, $2…”

Hawk: “$1 for these?”

Me: “Yes, the sticker price on those are fairly low…”

Hawk: “But I paid $20 for this at HMV!”

Me: “I know but that CD has dropped in price drastically since it came out. It’s a budget price disc now.”

Hawk: “Alright, alright, go on.”

Me: “$2 each, $3 each and $4 for those.”

Hawk: “But that’s a double.”

Me: “I know, but both discs are scuffed so I have to get both fixed, and it also sells for about the price of a single CD.”

Hawk: “Show me these scuffs you’re talking about.”

So I’d hand him a CD and point out the marks. Hawk would say, “That’ll just wipe off,” and then proceed to wipe the CD on his T-shirt and hand it back to me.

CRASHMe: “Yeah, that’s…that’s still scratched. Anyway, that’s those, you can certainly hang onto them if you want. As for these, these were all in excellent shape. For these I can go $2 each, $3 each…”

Hawk: “$3 for Pat Travers? Do you know how hard to get this is?”

Me: “OK, I’ll give you $4 on that one, but I can’t go any higher because it’s a budget CD these days. You can get it at HMV’s website brand new for about $11.”

Hawk: “I’m keeping my Pat Travers. My buddy offered me $10 for that one, he said it’s hard to get. I told him I was going to you first, because you guys say you offer the best prices in town.”

Me: “Yeah, sure, if he’s going to give you $10 for it, I would say go for it, that is a good deal for both of you.”

Hawk: “Gimme $10 for Travers and I’ll throw in this whole pile of CDs for free.”

Me: “But that’s the pile of CDs that I can’t take because they’re too scratched.”

Hawk: “So sell them at a buck a piece and you’re still making money.”

VALUEMe: “I’m sorry I can’t do that.”

Hawk: “Why not? Somebody will buy them. Just put the box out with a sticker that says $15 for the whole box and you’re gonna sell it.”

Me: “We don’t really sell stuff by the box…never mind, I just can’t take them, sorry about that.”

Hawk: “Alright. So what’s that come to? $100 and we’ll call it a deal.”

Me: “I can give you $80 cash or $90 store credit.”

Hawk: “$90.”

Me: “You want the store credit?”

Hawk: “No, you give me $90 cash and we’ll call it done.”

Me: “I’ll give you $80 cash and that’s a good deal.”

Hawk: “$90 and I give you this box of CDs.”

Me: “I can’t take those.”

Hawk: “Jesus, what happened to negotiation? I’ll take the $80!”

The Hawks. Reason #87 that I disliked buying used goods off the public!