Record Store Tales

#1173: I Like Iron Maiden…A Lot

RECORD STORE TALES #1173: I Like Iron Maiden…A Lot

In 1984, I “rebooted” my musical taste and started from ground zero.  Out went Styx for almost two decades.  Out went Joey Scarbury, and Kenny Rogers.  In came KISS, W.A.S.P., and of course, Iron Maiden.  I don’t think there was ever a time that Iron Maiden were my #1 favourite band, because Kiss almost always held that spot.  It is safe to say that Maiden were always in the top five.

In grade school, I rocked Iron Maiden while being scolded by Catholic school teachers for doing so.  It didn’t stop me.  Through highschool, I proudly had their posters in my locker.  It didn’t matter that Maiden weren’t hip with the cool kids.  I was never cool, and never really intended to be.  I was happy to be one of the Children of the Damned, not having to fit my personality into any particular shoebox.

There was a time I wavered, which I shall now admit to you.  There was one Iron Maiden album that I didn’t intend to own.  I reversed my decision within four months, but it was in the fall of 1990 that Iron Maiden may have faltered in my eyes.  The album was the “back to basics” No Prayer For the Dying.  My favourite member, Adrian Smith was out.  I loved Janick Gers’ work with Bruce Dickinson, but I don’t think he quite fit with Maiden immediately.  I also didn’t like the growly, un-melodic way that Bruce Dickinson was singing.  I thought maybe this time, I would just buy the CD singles, and not worry about the album.  I came to my senses.  No Prayer wasn’t bad, but it wasn’t the return that we hoped for.  I didn’t really want Maiden to get “back to basics” but was willing to go along for the ride.

My enthusiasm returned in 1992 with Fear of the Dark, a partial return to form with some solid tracks.  It could have been better, but I was happy.  Then the roof fell in.  Suddenly, Bruce Dickinson was out.  Meanwhile, the entire world had been sent into a grunge upheaval.  Bands like Iron Maiden were dismissed as irrelevant in this new angry world.  Bands who played their instruments with seasoned pride were being replaced by groups with punk aesthetics.  Maiden seemingly had no place in this new world, and now the lead singer was gone.  Just like Motley Crue, who were suffering a similar fate.

Blaze Bayley was the audacious name of the new singer, from Wolfsbane, and a different one he was.  A deep baritone, he was little like Bruce.  Immediately, I loved The X Factor.  My girlfriend at the time ridiculed me by telling me that Iron Maiden would “never be cool again”.

Oh, how wrong she was.

By the year 1999, Bruce was back.  And so was Adrian.  Maiden have never been bigger.  They have continued to issue albums, never being shy to play new material and deep cuts live.

That’s why I’m telling you this story.  2025 marks 50 Years of Iron Maiden, and there will be a lot happening.  2025 will launch the Run For Your Lives tour, and Bruce has promised that they will play some songs they’ve never done before.  It will also be the debut of new drummer Simon Dawson, from Steve Harris’ British Lion.  Nicko McBrain, on the drum stool since 1983, has finally taken a bow from the live stage.  It can’t be easy doing what he does.

2025 will also mark the launch of a new Martin Popoff book on Maiden (more on that in the coming weeks) and most importantly…tomorrow, January 10, Harrison Kopp and I will launch our own video series, 50 Years of Iron Maiden.

I have “only” been a fan for 40 years, but I’m all here for it.  Up the Irons.  Let’s give ‘er in 2025!

 

#1172: Top 5 Storeplay CDs – A Personal List

A sequel to #167:  Top Five Albums That Got Us In Shit At The Record Store
and #27:  Store Play

RECORD STORE TALES #1172: Top 5 Storeplay CDs – A Personal List

Let it be said:  The Beat Goes On had a lot of rules about what could and couldn’t be played in store.  You couldn’t scare off Grandma, shopping for the new NSync CD for the grandkid.  Therefore, Metallica’s Black Album was banned from store play.  Musicals, classical, and a large chunk of rap (language!) was banned.  Certain bands were banned outright:  Kiss & Rush.  (Tell me that wasn’t personal against me!)  Therefore, any time I could break the rules when bosses were not around, I would try to get away with playing music that I actually liked.

Another rule stated that you must pick five CDs of different genres, put them in the changer, and hit shuffle.  Me?  I preferred listening to albums, not shuffles.  But I was a good little employee 97% of the time.  This story is about the other 3%.

Here is a list of my Top 5 CDs that I loved playing at the Beat Goes On, whether it was allowed or not.

5. DIO – Holy Diver 

Most definitely NOT allowed to be played in store!  I didn’t care.  The boss man was out of town one day in 1996, and I knew I wouldn’t be caught by anyone that mattered.  Tom Morwood, who worked at our Waterloo store, popped in that afternoon to check out our jazz section.  We had just opened a few months earlier.  Upon hearing Holy Diver blasting from the speakers, Tom remarked:  “Holy Diver?  Wow.  That’s ballsy man!”

I didn’t own Holy Diver yet and I was checking it out for myself.  There was a lot to love, such as “Caught in the Middle” and “Don’t Talk to Strangers”.  I also played The Last In Line around the same time, and loved “Egypt (The Chains Are On)”.  It was a great way to discover classic music.  Which, of course, wasn’t the point of working in a used music store and trying to sell CDs.  “Nobody buys Dio,” reasoned the boss.  In ’96, he wasn’t too far off.  But I didn’t get caught.  Tom wouldn’t rat me out.

4. BLUE RODEO – Just Like A Vacation

This 1999 double live album came out when I was running two stores at the same time.  I was in charge of my own store on Fairway Road, but that summer I was also managing T-Rev’s store in Cambridge.  He was off helping put a new franchise together in (I think) Ajax Ontario, and I wasn’t given much choice in the matter.  I suppose it was a great compliment and a testament to management’s confidence in me, to give me two stores to run, but it sucked.  I felt like I was in exile when I wasn’t at my own store.

When this was a new release, I listened to both discs in sequence.  The acoustic balladeering and jams of Blue Rodeo really helped soothe that homesick feeling.  It’s a fabulous album.  In particular, the live version of “The Dimestore Greaser and the Blonde Mona Lisa” really hit.

3. MARILLION – Radiat10n

Same location, back in exile, but a different summer.  I discovered Marillion in 2000.  I had heard some of the Fish era stuff, but not the Hogarth.  This controversial album was on the shelves, so I put it in the player.  Mark Kelly looked a little weird on the inside, with the designs painted on his bald head, but let’s give it a shot.  By the end of the shift, I knew I was going to buy it.  I put in on a shuffle with four other discs.

As soon as it came on, I said, “Ah this must be the new Marillion singer.”  Steve Hogarth perked up my ears. Several songs jumped out immediately:  “Cathedral Walls”, “Under the Sun” and “The Answering Machine” in particular.

While my bosses might have scolded me and said “Don’t play Marillion, you’re not going to sell any!” a decades long obsession began by playing it in store.  So there you go.  The balance sheet doesn’t reflect that kind of lifetime impact.

2. The Candidates – Meet The Candidates

This Cambridge band included bassist/vocalist Neil McDonald, who also worked at our Cambridge location.  I genuinely loved this album he made with the Candidates.  Many of the songs connected with me in a big way, such as “Barely Bruised”.

They didn’t love that I played this frequently in store.  It was for sale, but it was unlikely that I would make a sale just by playing it.  People liked buying CDs with bands and songs they already knew, generally.  I was given a pass because, frankly Neil was favoured by management.

The reasons I played this in store so frequently are really simple.  One, I genuinely loved and connected with this album.  There are still songs, such as “Who’s Your Daddy Now?” that still connect with me.  “Sold your soul for a photograph, I tore it up and had the last laugh.”  I burned some bridges when I started Record Store Tales, and while I don’t know for sure that Neil was upset with me, I think it’s pretty likely.  I’m sorry about that – I’ll always think fondly of him and this band.

1.    – The Box Set

The closest I came to a breaking point, before I finally quit the store, was when I was working (exiled) to a miserable location in Oakville Ontario.  I have written extensively about this experience.  The customers were generally snooty and holier than thou.  A story about an asshole lawyer was a favourite with early readers of Record Store Tales.

The only good thing about Oakville was that I was working alone all day, and no bosses came there.  It was like working in another province, such were the frequency of the visits from head office.  The drive was really difficult and the mental health situation was not good.

And so, I played all five discs of the Kiss Box Set in sequence.  Because fuck you, boss.

Best song exclusive to the box at the time:  “Doncha Hesitate”, a classic sounding Kiss demo featuring all four original members, intended for Destroyer.

Had I been caught, I would have been given a boatload of trouble. But mental health is a thing too, and stuff like this helped keep me sane during a difficult few months managing two stores at once.  I was pushed so close to the edge, that it was a matter of luck that I survived.  And Kiss.  And that’s not hyperbole.  Playing the music I loved made the experience survivable, and that’s barely.

Thank you Kiss.

And that’s the list.  I hope you enjoyed this trip down memory lane.

#1171: The Best and Worst of 2024

RECORD STORE TALES #1171: The Best and Worst of 2024

‘Twas another interesting year here at Grab A Stack of Rock HQ!  Remember that old curse?  “May you have interesting times.”  We sure did in 2024.

Jen’s health started the year on a low note, but she bounced back.  With the right help, she’s had her best year in a long while.  There’s a lot of work still to be done, but has been a year of leaps and bounds for her health!

On Grab A Stack of Rock, we had a strong start to the year, but in February, Harrison got sick.  Sometimes you don’t how much you need someone until they’re fighting their own battles.  Fortunately Harrison fought hard and has made a recovery, but the timing for me wasn’t ideal.  I was trying to increase my YouTube presence by doing two shows a week, but without the Mad Metal Man, I found myself despondent.  I tried out a couple new co-hosts to fill in for him while he recovered, but struggled.  I almost cancelled the show.  Twice.

Still, I carried on, until the great shelf disaster of 2024.  That almost broke me.  I told people I was going to sell my collection and quit this hobby for good.  Because, ultimately, that’s what this is:  a hobby.  I don’t get paid enough to motivate me to produce content.  Advertising and T-shirt sales help fund my WordPress and Streamyard fees, but I don’t make a profit.  I don’t break even.  I’m about $10 in the hole every month.  I almost replaced Grab A Stack of Rock with a food show, after a review of a Chef Ramsay microwavable meal got some hits.  Grab A Stack of Eats?

But I didn’t quit.  I kept going.  Why?  The power of friendship.  They kept me going.  They know who they are.

Thanks to fellow music fans like Grant Arthur, Johnny Clauser, Marco D’Auria, Rob Daniels, Tim Durling, Peter Kerr, Harrison Kopp, Jex Russell, John Snow, Aaron Stewart, Metal Roger and many more, I pushed onwards.  I feel like we are now part of a larger, less insulated world.  I owe these folks a debt of gratitude for including me in that world.  All I have ever wanted, for better or for worse, was to be a part of something, with people who wanted me there equally as much.  I feel like I’m in a healthier space again.  We have built a bigger, more metallic and welcoming Community.    Long live the Community!

 

Highlights of my 2024:

I think the thing that brought me the most happiness in 2024 was simply making videos.  I’ve been making videos for 35 years, and there have been peaks and valleys.  In 2024, drones were incorporated into some.  Jex Russell encouraged me to utilise more angles and edits.  In one of the 2024 videos, I used six cameras, a record for me!

Since we already did our Top 5 Albums of 2024 on Grab A Stack of Rock, this year I thought I would pat myself on the back and pick my Top 5 Videos from my own channel!  I called it the 2024 Narcissus Award!

NARCICCUS AWARDS 2024

FAVOURITE VIDEOS OF THE YEAR

In no particular order.

1. The Battle of ’84:  Defenders of the Faith vs. Powerslave with Pete Jones

To have the Professor himself join me for the this epic battle was quite the honour.  We tore these albums inside and out, and ultimately picked a favourite.  Harrison even joined us at the end, which was a delight.  It was hard to pick just one episode of Grab A Stack of Rock for this list, but I think this was the deepest dive of the year.

2. Our Journey Collections on Six Formats with Tim Durling

From the brief period where I was trying to do two episodes a week.  I woke up one Saturday morning with the idea to do my entire Journey collection, but realized I didn’t have the historic knowledge of the band to do it justice.  Tim Durling happened to be online, and so we did this episode with zero preparation.  I think it turned out pretty cool.

3. Mike and Aaron Return to Toronto 2024.

Long overdue.  Of all our Toronto videos, this one is the best.  I think I just went into it with a clearer idea of the end product, and everything turned out as great as I’d hoped.  Plus, the Toronto trip was a total success as you’ll see with the scores we brought home with us.  A very special video to me personally.  Also, look for the drone shot!

2. An 8-Track Holy Grail discussion with Aaron and Tim Durling

Aaron texted me one day from Harriston, Ontario with photos of 8-track tapes he found.  One of them happened to be a very rare “Holy Grail” that Tim Durling needed for his collection.  Aaron sent it to me with some other cool scores, and then I sent the Grail to Tim.  We made this video in two sessions separated by several weeks, but with the magic of editing, it’s all seamless.  This is a very special video for anyone interested in 8-track tapes.

5. 30 Years After the Beat Goes On with Robert Daniels from Visions In Sound

I think this is my proudest achievement in 2024.  I had an idea.  It had been 30 years since I was hired at The Beat Goes On in Kitchener Ontario.  It would be cool to go back to the mall and see how much it has changed in those three decades.  Rob Daniels was the perfect guy to join me, since we reconnected at the front counter at The Beat Goes On.  We hadn’t seen each other since highschool.  He was an avid soundtrack buyer, and I was the new employee.  Together, with Jen on camera, we toured the mall landmarks and shared memories of the way it used to be.

I would have had better audio if I used external microphones, but never having done this before, I am incredibly proud of the way it turned out.

Bonus:  Mike’s Birthday Video by Jex Russell

I can’t really count this for the Narcissus award, because I didn’t make it.  However, my favourite video of 2024 was this kind gift.  Jex assembled a cavalcade of surprise birthday greetings from many of my friends, family, and a few special rock stars.  Jex put a lot of work into this video, not only with getting the guests, but editing it together with his own theatrics.  Probably the greatest birthday gift I’ve ever been given.  If I ever feel down in the dumps, I just need to watch Martin Popoff call me a “Canadian legend”.

I can’t say how grateful I am for this thoughtful gift.

I am excited for what 2025 has in store.  Buckle up.  If 2023 and 2024 couldn’t kick me down, then I still have a lot of gas left in the tanks.

 

List of everyone who has ever joined me on Grab A Stack of Rock to date:

  • Harrison Kopp
  • Eric “Uncle Meat” Litwiller
  • Aaron KMA
  • Tim Durling
  • Rob Daniels
  • John T Snow
  • Grant Arthur
  • Brian Richards
  • MarriedandHeels
  • Marco D’Auria
  • Kevin Simister
  • Dr. Kathryn
  • Jen Ladano
  • Grace Scheele
  • Jex Russell
  • Spencer “Spenny” Rice
  • Nurse Kat
  • Erik Woods
  • Jason Drury
  • PLA
  • Peter Kerr
  • John Clauser
  • Len Labelle
  • Reed Little
  • Metal Roger
  • John the Music Nut
  • Mike Slayen
  • Peter “The Professor” Jones
  • Todd Evans
  • James Kalyn
  • Angie Moon
  • Ryan Gavalier
  • Chris Preston
  • Dan Chartrand
  • Glen “Archie” Gamble
  • bicyclelegs
  • Davey Cretin
  • Martin Popoff (airing in 2025)
  • and (briefly) Max the Axe

TOP FIVE ALBUMS OF 2024

 

MR BIG – Ten

THE ARKELLS – Disco Loadout Vol 1

BRUCE DICKINSON – The Mandrake Project

JUDAS PRIEST – Invincible Shield

DEEP PURPLE – =1

 

 

VIDEO: 40th Anniversary: Record Store Tales #1: The Beginning – “Run to the Hills” – December 26, 1984. 12 Noon.

40 years ago today was one of the most pivotal in my life. It was the day I discovered Iron Maiden. It was the day my life changed forever, and I found my new identity. Star Wars was over a long time, and I was 12. Time to grow up. Heavy Metal was around the corner. On this day, December 26, 1984.

 

RECORD STORE TALES PART 1:  The Beginning – “Run To The Hills”

I still remember the first time I heard Iron Maiden.

Maybe it’s this way for some when they remember the first time they heard the Beatles, or the Stones. Or for those younger, maybe it’s like the first time they heard “Smells Like Teen Spirit” or “Fake Plastic Trees”. The first time I heard “Run To The Hills” was monumental to me, but I didn’t realize yet what the massive impact would be.

It was Christmas of 1984. I was a mere 12 year old looking for musical direction.  I hadn’t been much interested in music prior to that.  I had albums by Quiet Riot and Styx, but my majority of my collection was John Williams’ movie soundtracks.

I really wasn’t interested in music yet. I had yet to dedicate myself to any particular style. At the same time that I would listen to Quiet Riot, I somehow also thought Billy Ocean was cool.

Well, the video for “Loverboy” was nifty….

I had always been kinda afraid of heavy metal bands.  Guys that wore spikes, like Judas Priest or Iron Maiden. Kiss literally scared me when I was buying my first comics (there were always ads for Kiss posters inside comic books), and I know I wasn’t the only one. The neighbor kid was scared to death of Gene Simmons spitting up blood. Bands like Maiden and Priest looked like a bunch of hooligans, definitely up to no good, definitely out to hurt people, including kids.

Boxing Day, Bob came over. It was tradition, every Boxing Day, Bob and I would get together and compare our Christmas scores. Bob scored a cassette tape called Masters Of Metal Volume 2 and I was given an Atari game called Snoopy Vs. The Red Baron.

In my basement, we sat down to play the video game. Our goal was to take the game as far as humanly possible, to see what happened when you shot down so many planes that the Atari didn’t have enough characters to display it anymore. (Incidentally, disappointingly, like most Atari games, it just starts counting up from zero again.) We sat there playing that game so long that Bob had to go home and eat lunch, then come back. But what he left behind while eating was Masters Of Metal.

“Run To The Hills” came on. Some people speak of moments of clarity: That was my moment. The music was fast, powerful, dramatic and melodic. The lyrics were cool and you could mostly sing along. Most importantly, the music and lyrics seemed to combine with the game experience. When Dickinson was singing “Run to the hills, run for your lives!” it meshed perfectly!  Too bad Aces High wasn’t out yet!

A moment like that could quickly pass into history and be forgotten for most people.  As the day wore on, I realized that I had found something. This music kicked ass!  I was brought up on movie soundtracks.  This stuff had the same drama, but with guitars!   This was even better than Quiet Riot and AC/DC, so I said at the time.

It didn’t end there of course. We played through Masters Of Metal, finding a few more diamonds. “You’ve Got Another Thing Coming” By Judas Priest was definitely a close second to “Run To The Hills”. We were fixated on Accept’s “Balls To The Wall”.  We’d play it over and over again laughing hysterically at the lyrics.  But the song still rocked!  I can still remember when MuchMusic started the Power Hour, and they played that video.  There’s little Udo Dirkscheider, in his camo pants, and crew cut, rocking with these skinny German guys with long hair.  It was fucking hilarious!

We skipped (what we then thought was) the crap…Lee Aaron, Anvil, Triumph.  I grew into them later, particularly Triumph.  Something to do with double guitars, maybe.  I digress.  We always came back to Iron Maiden.  Always.

Bob would bring other tapes over as the months and years went by. W.A.S.P., Motley Crue, Black Sabbath. Now Bob’s a father of four who doesn’t listen to rock music anymore, which makes me sad in a way.  I’m not sad for him, because he’s got a great family and always has.  I’m more sad because I don’t think he can ever appreciate what impact our shared experiece of rocking out had on me.  Listening to Iron Maiden, Judas Priest, and the rest.  The was it, the beginning.

#1170: The Smaller the Better – Christmas 2024

RECORD STORE TALES #1170: The Smaller the Better – Christmas 2024

2024 was one of our smallest Christmas gatherings, both in budget and in population, but it was certainly one of my happiest.

Sometimes everything just feels right, and this year’s Christmas Eve was held back at the old family home once again.  It was the first Christmas Eve there in over a decade, but that’s my happy place at Christmas.  A place I can feel comfortable.  After all, it was my home for 29 years.  I settled in with my dad and watched Superman the Movie while Jen made cookies.  We awaited the arrival of my mom, Dr. Kathryn, and a few dogs.

Jen knit custom gifts for the dogs (shawls, mittens and hats).  She also knit custom shawls for the ladies, and toques for the men.  I love mine.

As an introvert, I do well in small groups.  Dinner was the traditional beef fondue (or chicken or schnitzel), with bonus vegan options.  I brought over some special flavoured salts and hot sauces to sample.

We did that Christmas “white elephant” game, or whatever you want to call it.  The “$10 gift game” is another name for it.  Initially, I won this cool set of chocolate “coffee bombs”.  I made it very clear how happy I was with it, and that I intended to make myself a coffee as soon as I got home.  I spotted one with little marshmallows and relished the idea of it.  Then my mom went next and stole it.  I stole it back when I had the chance, and then she stole it again at first opportunity.  The funny coda to this story is that after Jen and I got home, we put on a “Best of Saturday Night Live” show and there was a sketch featuring the exact same game.  One character was complaining that it was a mean-spirited game, because he had received the perfect gift for himself, and someone stole it.  I called my mom to laugh about that.  The story doesn’t end there.

Christmas day featured some sleeping in and some Marvel What If? on Disney+.  SPOILER this episode featured a Kiss song as an integral part of the story, and even had a line of dialogue from Howard the Duck explaining that the song was written by Kiss in 1979.

I won the $25 Amazon gift card at the “Christmas pickle” game.  I wasn’t even going to participate, but after seeing Jen and Dr. Kathryn getting nowhere, I entered the fray.  I quickly boxed Dr. Kathryn into a corner, where she was unable to see the front of the tree, where my mom had announced the pickle to be.  Once spotted, I used the pickle to order the new Van Halen For Unlawful Carnal Knowledge box set.  It’ll be here Saturday.

There were some really cool items in my grab bag this Christmas.

I had hoped someone would get me Brothers by Alex Van Halen, and Dr. Kathryn came to the rescue there.  It’s a beautiful looking book, and emotional too from what I have read while skipping through.

Bubbles from the Trailer Park Boys has a new album out with standards new and old:  Longhauler: The Best of Bubbles and the Shitrockers.  If you need to ask, don’t.  I was surprised that the album was produced and engineered by Eddie Kramer!

Queen’s A Night at the Odeon (1975) is another album that came highly recommended.  I wishlisted it and it magically appeared in my stocking thanks to my parents.  It looks like a winner.

Finally, some anniversary editions from Jen:  Judas Priest’s Rocka Rolla, and Twisted Sister’s Stay Hungry.  Rocka Rolla is probably the best album remix I have heard in my life.  Tom Allom pretty much just made the album sound like itself, but beefier.  As if you had always heard it distant and muffled, and now you can hear it fully for the first time.  As if you just got a new stereo and are hearing this music properly for the first time.  As for Twisted, I find it funny that I already own the 30th anniversary edition, with a very different set of bonus music.

Of interest:  this is probably the 3rd time I have received Rocka Rolla for Christmas.  It is my 2nd for Stay Hungry at Christmas time.

As usual, I received some treats and games, including two more editions of Uno to play at the cottage this summer.  My mom got me some Trailer Park Boys pickle flavoured chips, and who knew that such a thing existed?

As for my mom, she used to do this thing when we were kids, where she would take a larger box of candy and split it up into smaller gifts that could fit into stockings.  She did that for me this year…with her chocolate coffee bombs that she got the night before.  She gave me one of each flavour, since I had called about the Saturday Night Live sketch.  Thanks mom.  You win this time.

Hope everyone had as merry a Christmas as we did!

#1169: Discontinuing the Tapes

RECORD STORE TALES #1169: Discontinuing the Tapes

In 1995, the writing was on the wall.  After struggling for years as a new CD/tape store, the boss discovered a goldmine:  selling used CDs.  The story has been told a dozen times or more, but the short version is this.  In early 1994, the boss brought a small tray of used CDs into the store, priced them, and they sold out immediately.  I think the discs came from his own collection with a few from his brother.  He realized that he could buy used CDs from the public for a few bucks, and then flip them for double or triple the price.  The hunger days ended soon after.

Profit margins on new CDs and tapes was slim.  After you factor in shipping, overhead, paying the part-timers, and an expensive magnetic security system, the boss was left with little for himself, if nothing at all.  He could not survive like that forever.  With used CDs, he could control his own costs.  This was something rare in retail.  Costs are usually determined by your supplier.  You could negotiate for better rates, but it was nothing compared to used CDs.  We could pay five or six bucks for a CD, and sell it for ten or twelve bucks.

You know what happened next.  Expansion!  Waterloo opened, followed by a second store in Kitchener.  These stores had 90% used stock, with a small chart for new releases.  They didn’t carry cassette tapes, at all.  While this surprised me, it was a smart move.  We were ahead of the curve by not carrying cassettes in those stores.   We didn’t even carry used tapes.  For one, it was harder to check them for quality compared to CDs.  For second, it simplified things greatly by only focusing on discs.  One product, one display system, one storage system.  You could take the disc out of the case, hide it behind the counter, and put the empty case on the shelf.  The security system was replaced in this simple way.

Eventually the original Stanley Park Mall store had to close.  Rent in malls is higher than that in plazas.  It was the only store that still carried a full selection of new CDs and tapes.  It closed at the end of 1995, right after Christmas.  And we weren’t allowed to tell people we were closing.  Technically, it was a move.  A new location had been procured in Cambridge.  It too was to follow the 90% used model.  Although we called it a move for the purpose of good optics, the reality was that one store closed and another very different store opened in another city.  The manager was the same, and they took the unsold stock and sold it as used, but it was a new store.

Closing Stanley Park put us in an awkward position.  In 1995, we lived in what was essentially a two format world:  CDs first and foremost, with cassettes still strong, but dying off bit by bit every year.  More and more releases were coming out on CD only.  Vinyl?  In 1994, only Pearl Jam had a mainstream vinyl release.  We carried Vitalogy on vinyl.  It was beautiful.  The boss opened a copy to look at it.  He ended up selling that one to his brother.  But what about that awkward position?  Here we were, going into the Christmas season and selling gift certificates to a small but significant number of people who still only had cassettes players.  We were selling gift certificates to people who were not going to be able to redeem them for cassettes except for a small window:  the six days following Christmas.  Many of those people had been customers for five years, since we opened.

“If someone complains about it, tell them to talk to me, I’ll take care of it.”  The boss was not the kind of person who relished giving people their money back, but I am sure he handled those cases as best he could.  We did special order cassettes for customers for a short period of time in some of these cases; they were isolated cases.  We had some cassettes returned in the new year as well, which had to be dealt with.

I do remember some angry customers.  “Where am I gonna buy my tapes now?” asked one guy who was unhappy, to say the least, that we were closing up, moving to a new location, and ceasing cassettes completely.  I suggested the HMV store at the other mall, but even they were noticeably cutting back.

For me, it was interesting to have lived through these changes in formats.  As a fan, I watched vinyl decline in importance to the point where nobody in highschool bought records anymore.  That was 1986.  Then I lived through the advent of CD, and its eventual replacement of the cassette.  I was working in the front lines at the Beat Goes On when Napster came along, and I saw shelf space once reserved for CDs now showcasing bobbleheads.

I wouldn’t trade it for the world.  All apologies to the inconvenienced!

 

#1168: Christmas Crack

A sequel to #106:  My Favourite Aunt
and #287:  Closing Time

RECORD STORE TALES #1168: Christmas Crack

Closing time at the Beat Goes On wasn’t always easy.  At 8:45, we shut down all the customer listening station and began tidying up for cashout.  If people came in during the last 15 minutes, we reminded them that we were closing soon.  Some were respectful of that, and did their shopping within the allotted time frame.  Some brought in CDs to sell at the last minute, always an irritant.  Others purposely seemed to take their time, as if to put us in our place.  “How dare they tell me, the customer, that I only have 15 minutes to shop.  I’ll take as long as I want.”  Retail employees always have to put up with the worst behaved adults, so much so that we often forget the good ones.

December 23, probably 2002, I was closing up with a newer employee name Lori.  We were closing per normal procedure, getting ready for the big chaos on December 24.  Straightening the CDs on the shelves.  Filing things away.  Shutting down the customer listening stations.  Cleaning, counting the minutes.  Having a perfectly pleasant closing.

In came a mid-30s disheveled looking woman, lugging an absolutely huge black garbage bag.

“Hey guys!  Looking for some used CDs?” she asked with a huge smile on her face.

It was never a good sign when used CDs arrived inside a huge black garbage bag.  It didn’t speak well for the quality of the discs inside.

Had the bossman/owner been there that night, five minutes before closing on December 23, he would have seen dollar signs.  I know exactly what he would have done.  He would have told the woman to put the bag on the counter, called me over, and instructed me to race through the piles and check every disc for quality.  Then we would have had to check every once for pricing and current stock, so we could make an offer.  With a garbage bag the size she brought it, we’d probably be there until close to 10 that night, especially since we would have to log each disc.  It wouldn’t have been the first time he kept me that late after closing at Christmas time.  “We will need this stock after the annual Christmas blowout,” he would have thought to himself.  As a bonus, she looked desperate, so we could lowball her too.

Not feeling like a slave to the cash register on December 23, I took the initiative and turned her away.

“You’ll have to come back tomorrow,” I said as my part-timer continued to tidy up for closing.  “We’re done at nine.”

“But it’s not nine yet!” she protested.  “Where am I supposed to get the money?”

Ah I see.  Crackhead, as I suspected when she walked in with the garbage bag.  We had a lot of those.

“Well, we’re going home…it’s the day before Christmas Eve.  All the pawn shops are closed now.  You can leave the bag here for us to look at tomorrow morning if you want to.”  I gambled that she’d say “no” to that idea.  Crackheads were not the most trusting people.

“Well can you just look at a couple of them and give me a few bucks?”

I decided that I just didn’t want to.

“Sorry.  We’re cashing out.”

Should I have looked at her discs, at least until it was time to lock the doors?  Yes, I should have.  But then we’d have to ID her, log the dics, and pack them up.  Did she even have any ID?  And I just wanted to go home.  My boss called it “old dog syndrome”.  I called it “I don’t get paid enough to deal with crackheads at closing time” syndrome.

So the unhappy woman packed up her garbage bag and lugged it out the door, off to who-knows-where.  Not to buy crack though.

Merry Christmas.

#1165: Zero the Hero (The True Story of My Favourite Album of All Time)

RECORD STORE TALES #1165:  Zero the Hero
The True Story of My Favourite Album of All Time

1984.

It wasn’t I that owned Born Again by Black Sabbath.  That would have been Bob Schipper, who had all manners of metal in his cassette collection.  I knew very little about Black Sabbath when I first discovered music at the end of 1984.  Though Ian Gillan was not the lead singer by the time I became interested in bands like Black Sabbath, he was for all intents and purposes the lead singer to me.  Magazine coverage of Black Sabbath goings-on were beyond my reach, and this would be the last Sabbath album for a few years anyway.  To me, Black Sabbath were:  the two guys with the moustaches, the guy with the long black hair, and the drummer…who looked completely different in the music video for “Zero The Hero” than he did on the Born Again cassette cover.  How was I to know that original Sabbath drummer Bill Ward had been replaced by a guy named Bev Bevan?  I was just starting out on my rock journey.  I had the puzzle pieces in my hands, but no picture to guide the assembly.

It all started when Bob came over one day raving about this song called “Zero the Hero”.  “You gotta hear it!  It goes, ‘Whatcha gonna be, whatcha gonna be, Zero the Hero!'”  Bob was right that the chorus was pretty cool and memorable.  The effects on Gillan’s voice on the chorus lent it a metallic sheen.  He let me borrow the tape a bit to listen.  I enjoyed it.  Master of Reality was another one we listened to together.  He liked a song called “Children of the Grave”, especially the spooky outro.  Born Again had some spooky stuff on it too.  This would come in handy a little later on.

As I discovered bands, I tended to hear the stuff that most popular in my own neighborhood.  W.A.S.P., Iron Maiden, Kiss, Judas Priest, Van Halen, ZZ Top.  I heard some of The Police as well, but my closest friends were rockers.  Metal heads.  There was a serious division in music back then:  Heavy Metal vs. New Wave.  You couldn’t like both.  To us, everything that wasn’t metal was “New Wave”.  If you liked Corey Hart, you were a “Waver”.  If you liked Tears For Fears, you were a “Waver”.  In our neighborhood, you didn’t want to be a Waver.   Basically a Waver would be a slur along the lines of “gay” or whatever the kids were saying back then.  I remember “hurtin’ eunuch” was a phrase that kids like Jeff Brooks would throw around at kids like me.

Anyway, I threw myself into metal full-time and counted Black Sabbath as one of the bands I liked.  I didn’t own any Black Sabbath, but I could name two songs that I liked.  I think Ozzy Osbourne had something to do with the band, and that singer with the black hair was also in Deep Purple.  I was learning.  I didn’t know his name, and I didn’t realize that Ronnie James Dio was also in Black Sabbath (mind blown there) but I was piecing that puzzle together.  I had a few of the edges together, and now I would work on the body:  collecting the music.

In the mid-80s, Bob and I were too old for going trick or treating at Halloween time.  Instead we gave out candy at Bob’s house.  We wanted to go all out and really make a cool “haunted house”, and for that you needed sound effects.  Instead of spending valuable allowance money on one of those corny Halloween tapes, we made our own.  We did this by looping the scary bits of Black Sabbath songs.  Bob especially liked that haunting whisper at the end of “Children of the Grave”.  We made loops, maybe 10 of them, adding in our own bits via an external microphone.  Then we would loop “The Dark” a few times, until the side was full.  Bob would go home and eat lunch, and come back later that afternoon to work on more Halloween stuff.  We were very resourceful and creative.  To this day I have never used pre-made Halloween sounds.  I always made my own by looping bits of songs.  It worked.  Kids would either go straight to our house for candy like a bee to honey…or they would run past terrified!

[Bob and I learned from this experience when a young girl cried at our house.  If we saw anyone really really little approaching, we would kill the sounds and turn on the lights.  It wasn’t our goal to make kids cry.]

I managed to record the music video from the Pepsi Power Hour one afternoon.  I called Bob over to watch it with me.  It was (and remains) one of the weirdest things I’ve ever seen in my life.  A Frankenstein looking guy and a Franken-Hitler guy appear to be resurrecting a dead body as…a nerd?  They force fed him eggs with ketchup, while he grinned the whole way through.  Then, a horse walked backwards down a flight of stairs in a mansion.  Meanwhile, scenes of the band playing live were cut in, and you could hardly see Gillan’s face.  It was weird…and heavy.  We hated it.  But I loved it.

Finally one day in highschool I said to myself, “Why the heck haven’t I taped Born Again off Bob Schipper yet?”  I wanted that song “Zero the Hero”.  I popped over one afternoon and borrowed it.  I put it in deck “A” of my Sanyo dual deck ghetto blaster, with a Maxell blank 60 in “B”.  I hit “dub” and began recording.  For whatever reason (and I tried a couple times), I could not get a good copy of that tape.  It wasn’t the best blaster in the world that I was using, but there was so much warble in the copies I made, I got fed up.  I called Bob and asked if I could just buy the tape from him.  I knew it wasn’t in regular rotation at his house.  He said “OK” and I gave him $2 or $3 for it.

I was finally able to listen to Born Again properly.  I liked a few songs such as “Trashed”, “Disturbing the Priest”, “Born Again” and “Keep It Warm”.  It played better on my Walkman, so that’s where most of my listening happened.  That meant it was often on the way to the cottage, or at the cottage, where I used my Walkman most.

I don’t know when Born Again became my favourite album of all time.  I really don’t.  The tape grew on me through the years, but the poor quality of that old WEA cassette made listening hard.  It probably elevated to “among my favourites” when T-Rev found me a vinyl copy in 1995, a full decade since I first became acquainted with it.  A decent CD reissue followed a few years later, and then it hit serious heavy rotation.

Keep it warm, rat:  I love this album for all its flaws and overreaching.  It brings me back to that bedroom, dubbing scary music with Bob.  It brings me back to listening on my Walkman at the cottage at night.  It brings me back to that place where I escaped all the bullies and teachers, and was alone with my own imagination.

Yes, Born Again is my favourite album of all time.  I play it more often than I should, sometimes twice in a row.  No remix or reissue could make me love this album more.  I am Born Again!

#1164: It’s Not Personal: An Uncle Paul Story

RECORD STORE TALES #1164: It’s Not Personal: An Uncle Paul Story

Jen and I have withstood a lot of funerals over the years.  Some were really great tributes to the people we lost.  Others, less so.

When Jen’s mom died, she wanted a Catholic funeral, so of course we obliged.  Jen and I are both what you might call “lapsed Catholics”.  We were both baptised, but stopped practising the faith decades ago.  While preparing for Jen’s mom’s funeral, we were asked if we were Catholics.  Not sure how to respond while still getting Jen’s mom the funeral she wanted, we both answered yes.  Father Imperial (yes, that was his name) knew we were lying.  We had separated the ashes into two urns – a big no no.  Catholics believe you can only get into heaven if your ashes are in one urn.  (Yay dogma!)  His disappointment was visible when nobody in the church knew the responses to the Catholic service.  We did our best, but that was not a good funeral for us.

We had Uncle Paul’s funeral in 2023, but the pressure wasn’t on us this time.  I was asked to be a casket bearer, but I used my gammy right arm as an excuse not to do it.  (I’m glad I didn’t; I watched the casket being carried down stairs and over headstones, and I could not have done it.)  We just sat in the church and paid our respects.  The funeral wasn’t very personal.  In most of the other funerals we’d done, the pastor asked for stories and personality traits that he could read during the service.  Those were good funerals.  People laughed, people cried, people shared memories.  Uncle Paul’s wasn’t like that.  It was very impersonal.  It could have been for anybody.

11 months later, there was a memorial service for people lost in the last two months of 2023.  It was the same priest presiding, and Uncle Paul was to have a candle lit in his name.  We all decided to attend the memorial mass.

We weren’t familiar with the area and had to park six blocks away.  The church was packed and we were not able to sit together.  We sat and did the things you do at a Catholic mass.  You stand, you kneel, you stand, you kneel.  Our kneeling bench wasn’t working, so that was awkward.

Finally they started reading the names of the people lost, so a candle could be lit in their name.  It wasn’t alphabetical, so we just listened and waited to hear Uncle Paul’s name.

“Paul Laderno,” said the priest.  The same priest who presided over his funeral.

“They didn’t even say his name right!” I whispered to my mom next to me.  I didn’t care if anyone heard me.  I was very upset.

How hard is it to say our name?  I now had a new variation to add to our long list of mispronunciations.  It felt so impersonal.  It felt like nobody cared, except us.  A real disservice to a great man, who was indeed a man of faith.  He deserved better.  “Laderno”.  Normally I’m the one to see the humour in things, but I didn’t this time.

We had a nice visit with my Aunt Maria after the service.  That made up for the disappointing mass.

Uncle Paul’s resting place is now capped with a stone, a marker so cool it deserves to be shared here.  This is the kind of memorial he deserves.  On the back, a crisp picture of his beloved vintage ‘Cuda.  A Blue Jay logo sits in a corner, waiting for my Aunt one day.   This is closer to how I’ll remember him.  Always there for his cars and my aunt.

We don’t often talk about cemeteries and headstones being cool…but my uncle’s is cool.

 

 

 

 

#1163: Not A Review of the Movie ‘Elf’ (2003)

RECORD STORE TALES #1163: Not A Review of the Movie ‘Elf’

December 2004 was a low point. My mental and probably physical health too were…not good. I was managing two record stores against my wishes. I was in charge of the Beat Goes On on Highland Road, and Oakville. Oakville was supposed to be somebody else’s store, a franchise. Well, things went from bad to worse and I found myself driving to Oakville every day for many weeks in November and December, in a car that was not long for the grave.  I was going to work, coming home, drinking red wine and going to bed.  It was a cycle of endless days and weekends too.

My boss took me aside; had a meeting with me behind closed doors.

“Mike, I noticed you’re not doing well with the whole Oakville thing.”

There was no such thing as mental health time off in my world.  I wouldn’t have known you could do that.  Could you, in 2003?

My boss suggested that I use the commute time to listen to “old cassettes that you haven’t played in a while.  That could be fun for you.”

That’s when I learned that listening to Winger when you’re stuck in 401 traffic isn’t actually all that fun.

I took a break one afternoon in Oakville and walked over to some crappy store that sold everything from soda pop to small appliances.  I saw Elf on the racks, the Christmas movie starring Will Ferrell as…an elf.  I was skeptical.  I heard mixed things.  But I was in a shitty headspace and I needed a pick-me-up.  Retail therapy.  Elf and a soda pop went into my shopping bag. I may have even bought a bag of chips.

I had Sunday off, and I watched Elf in my pajamas that morning.  And I laughed.  I was immediately enthused because the beginning reminded me very much of Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer, what with the animation and the snowman.  I was also following Jon Favreau’s directorial career with great interest.  Peter Billingsley was in the movie.  I truthfully loved it from day one.  I still love it.

My dad on the other hand calls Will Ferrell “that annoying guy” because of this movie.

I remember wrapping Christmas presents with my mother in law Debbie while watching Elf.  I don’t really know if she liked it or not, but she liked watching it with me.  I think she liked a lot of it.  James Caan.  Mary Steenbergen.  Bob Newhart.  These are fantastic actors, and James Caan provided that “realistic” perspective that an absurd movie like this needs.  To sum:  Buddy the Elf (Ferrell) realizes he’s too tall to be an elf, and then Papa Elf (Newhart) finally tells him the truth:  his parents were human, and James Caan is his dad, and he lives in New York City.  And so off Buddy the Elf walks from the North Pole all the way to New York in order to meet his real dad.  Chaos ensues of the culture shock variety.  James Caan, as the biological father thrust into this situation, is the point of view the audience needs to make it work.  The scenes with he and Buddy are often some of the best.  Having said that, there is a badass snowball fight in Central Park, and some great singing from Zoey Deschanel, who doesn’t seem to question the weirdness of this elf guy who’s falling for her.  (Look for a cameo by Tenacious D’s Kyle Gass.)

Wonderful movie in my opinion, with clever use of perspective to make Buddy tower over his elf kin.  Hilarious performances by Peter Dinklage, Faizon Love, and Leon Redbone as the snowman.  Family friendly fun.

So, I thought, “I’ll buy this for Grandma for Christmas.  She enjoys light movies that make her smile.”  I was basing this on a years-before viewing of Ernest Saves Christmas that she enjoyed with us.  And I don’t know if she ever watched Elf.  I asked her a few days later.

“I don’t think I got it Michael,” she said.  “I fell asleep, and when I woke up, it was still the same scene playing.”

She was watching the animated DVD menu.

I didn’t buy Grandma movies for Christmas after that!