Please welcome Harrison to the Saturday live stream! With only minor technical glitches, the Mad Metal Man himself joined me from the other side of the world today.
Today’s subject: A solid “Nigel Tufnel Top Ten” list on the might Judas Priest. Harrison was armed with an addition list by Holen! We ended with an announcement. Link to the Mad Metal Man’s own new website below!
THE MAD METAL MAN – Reviews and Rambles
Life is too short. Don’t let your family stay estranged. That is the lesson today as we mourn the passing of Bob Kulick from the KISS family.
Bob auditioned for KISS in 1973 and would have got the spot if a guy with one red and one orange shoe didn’t walk in next. That man was named Paul “Ace” Frehley, but when Ace couldn’t do the job, Bob stepped in to help. That’s Bob playing on a lot of Alive II‘s side four. Then he played on Paul’s first solo album.
Bob helped his brother Bruce get into KISS in 1984. Without Bob, KISStory would have been very different. He also played with Meat Loaf, Graham Bonnett and many more.
Rest in peace Bob Kulick.
THE CARS – Candy-O (1979 Elektra, 2017 expanded edition)
How many perfect albums are there in the world? Albums with no filler, only songs vital to the whole and valuable to the listening experience? Hopefully you have included The Cars’ Candy-O in your count. The often “difficult” second album was apparently no problem for The Cars. Ric Ocasek came in with a huge batch of new minimalist songs, plus a couple outtakes.
“I like the night life, baby!” Ben Orr takes the first lead vocal on “Let’s Go”, the Max Webster-like lead single. Already off to a great start, this tight little number is subtle and loaded to the gills with hooks.
“Somethin’ in the night just don’t sit right.” Ric Ocasek enters the fray with a quirky “Since I Held You”. The Cars’ unique way with a melody is apparent on this track, one of those deeper cuts you don’t want to miss. David Robinson’s drums — loud and effective at punctuation. Give credit to producer Roy Thomas Baker for wringing every last hook out of these songs.
“And once in a night, I dreamed you were there.” A restrained ballad, it unleashes the melodic power of the Cars at the chorus, given a bump by Greg Hawkes’ mini moog. One of their more accomplished compositions, every part serving its purpose.
“It takes a fast car, lady, to lead a double life.” The possible centrepiece of the album, Ocasek’s “Double Life” smoulders and builds into a dark masterpiece. At one point this track was to be dropped from the album; let’s be glad the Cars came to their sense. Though the song is built on a punchy, sharp beat, Elliot Easton’s guitar melody floats detached above.
“You ride around in your cadium car, keep wishin’ upon a star.” A robotic pulse and frantic vocal make up “Shoo Be Doo”, a transitional piece that serves to bridge the two songs it falls between. Candy-O is beginning to sound like a concept album to the ears.
“Edge of night, distract yourself.” The fierce title track “Candy-O”, fronted by Ben Orr, is another possible centerpoint of the album. The song is layered thick with Elliot Easton’s guitar hooks and Greg Hawkes’ keyboard blips. Though not a single, “Candy-O” has become a favourite and a great example of the Cars’ musical abilities as players.
“Ooh, how you shake me up and down, when we hit the night spots on the town.” Jittery and caffeinated, the noturnal “Night Spots” again verges on Max Webster territory. Ocasek stutters his way through the lyrics while the hyper band get bouncing in behind. It feels like you’ve been staying awake for three days and three nights with nothing but coffee in your blood.
“I can’t put out your fire, I know it’s too late.” The album then takes a sudden left turn back to smoother ground, playing looser on the ballad “You Can’t Hold On Too Long”. The lyrics take a darker turn, with the shadow of addictions.
“He’s got his plastic sneakers, she’s got her Robuck purse.” Ocasek sings an anthem to the mismatched on “Lust for Kicks”, another punchy Cars song though with a laid back tempo. Hawkes’ simple keyboard hook is the main structure, with Easton providing guitar noise far in the background. Ocasek’s expressive vocal is the focus.
“Send me a letter on a midnight scroll.” There’s a frantic energy to “Got a Lot on My Head”, a sense of panic and urgency. This time it’s the guitar in front and some of the Cars proto-punk roots break through. A lot is packed into a short song.
“Can I bring you out in the light? My curiosity’s got me tonight.” A third contender for centerpiece of the album is the closer “Dangerous Type”, and its closing position might be its only disqualifier. Though it has a “Bang-a-Gong” knockoff riff for the verses, the chorus dips into much darker territory. Then another Max Webster moment creeps in when Hawkes adds his moog. This brilliant track is an apt closer for such a quirky yet dark album.
Indeed, Candy-O seems semi-obsessed with the night, with shadows, and with secrets. So it’s quite unexpected how uplifted you feel after listening to it — lighter and brighter. As if the shadows have been exorcised, at least for a little while.
Candy-O itself is only 36 minutes, so if you need a deeper immersion, the expanded edition is perfect. It contains seven bonus tracks: five alternate versions, one B-side and one unreleased song. (There is an additional piece of rare music available separately, a very different early version of “Night Spots” on Just What I Needed: The Cars Anthology). Remarkably, though rougher, most of these are probably good enough for an album already. If you already love Candy-O, you will dig the slightly different and more raw versions offered as bonus tracks. “Dangerous Type” is far less dark, and “Let’s Go” is busier.
“They Won’t See You”, like early 80s Alice Cooper, has a dark campy quality but also a biting guitar hook. It’s actually better than a lot of Cooper from that period, even though it was never released. Apparently it was a popular Cars encore. Finally (and appropriately) its “That’s It”, ending the CD at an hour in length (easy enough to digest in a single sitting). If not for the technical limits of vinyl at the time, it might have made an excellent coda for the original album. It’s a song about endings, so it works naturally at the end of this edition.
Candy-O, with or without the extras, is a perfectly brilliant listen and an album that deserves a place of honour in a collection. But why get 36 minutes when you can have an hour, plus an expanded booklet with lyrics, photos and Easton essay? “Let’s Go”!
5/5 stars
ALICE COOPER – “Don’t Give Up” (2020 iTunes)
Thank God for Alice Cooper! 50 years ago, he was considered by the mainstream to be nothing more than an untalented shock rocker. In 2020, he is inspiring people to keep on keepin’ on. He’s got a powerful message for anyone who needs to hear it.
“Don’t Give Up” is the most direct, the most topical and the least “Alice” song that the Coop has ever done. Why the “least” Alice? Because this time he is not playing a character. He’s not telling some horrifying bedtime story. Or is he? “Don’t Give Up” is about Coronavirus and blatantly so.
“Yeah, I know you’re struggling right now. We all are, in different ways. It’s like a new world that we don’t even know. It’s hard to sleep, even harder to dream. But look, you got seven billion brothers and sisters all in the same boat! So don’t panic. Life has a way of surviving and going on and on. We’re not fragile and we sure don’t break easy.”
This single was recorded in home studios. It’s accompanied by a cool video expertly produced by Canuck Frank Gryner, using footage sent in by fans. It is so rare for Alice to really make a statement that pertains to current events. And it is a very specific song; there are no underlying stories or metaphors to untangle. But when you think about Coop, it’s not really surprising that he came out of the gates so fast with a song like this. Alice Cooper is a human being that cares about other human beings. The message is simple: keep fighting and don’t give up. Sometimes people need to actually hear the words.
Musically you could call “Don’t Give Up” a power ballad. It has a very 80’s guitar figure, with Alice speaking his message over it. The chorus is more modern, with Alice singing as plaintively as he can. “Don’t Give Up” is unremarkable as a rock ballad, but as a lyrical accomplishment, Alice has forged new ground 50 years on. He has written some remarkably powerful words.
“Our enemy is a cold, indiscriminate monster. It doesn’t care if you’re old or a newborn. It exists to kill. You and I are nothing to it. It has no heart or soul or conscience. Do we fear it? Yeah! Do we cower before it? Hell no! We’re the blood-n-guts human race. And we win.”
The important thing that Alice says here is that it is alright to be afraid. Look, Alice has fought demons, and if this scares him then there is no shame in feeling fear. People are being labelled as cowards for wearing a mask in public. Alice is right — we will win, and we will do whatever it takes to win. If you’re scared right now, you tell ’em that Alice Cooper said that’s OK.
3.5/5 stars
GETTING MORE TALE #834: Top Five Masked Artists
The Masked Singer, you say? Never seen the show; not interested. What about real artists who wear, or have worn, masks? Not makeup, but an actual physical face covering? Since masks are everywhere today, and sometimes required depending on where you go, let’s have a look at some artists who were already ahead of the (flattening) curve.
#5: Crimson Glory
Before Slipknot, Mushroomhead, and before Ghost, Crimson Glory were the most famous masked metal band. Often compared to Queensryche (but more ambitious), Crimson Glory were fronted by singer Midnight. He wore a half-mask so he could sing, while the rest of the band kept their faces fully covered. At first, anyway. The masks were toned down on the second album and eventually dropped. But when their debut appeared in ’86, they looked like nobody else. That they are forgotten is unfair — they don’t even appear on Wikipedia’s “masked musicians” list!
#4: Buckethead
At best, Brian Carroll is a recluse. He’s rarely been photographed without his plain white mask and a chicken bucket on his head (though you can find pictures of a young unmasked Carroll online). According to Bucket, the mask was inspired by Michael Myers in Halloween 4. It is highly likely that the anonymity of a mask allows Buckethead to loosen up and perform live. In all probability, the mask helps him get into his creative headspace. It’s not too much of a stretch to say that without the mask there could be no Buckethead.
#3: Nash the Slash
Nash was very early in the mask game, having started wearing bandages in 1979, the same year the Residents started wearing giant eyeball helmets. The Slash, or Jeff Plewman, passed away in 2014. He was best known as a founding member of FM, playing electric violin and mandolin. His 1980 solo cover of “Dead Man’s Curve” had a music video featuring that bandage mask, and trademark top hat. It was one of the weirdest videos of its time.
#2: Slipknot
I considered Gwar for this position, but then I remembered: Gwar don’t wear masks. They are aliens that crash landed in Antarctica. No, seriously, this position should belong to Gwar except that I don’t really consider them a masked band. What they have done takes the idea of “masks” and puts them in an entirely unique category. Gwar might be the top “costumed” band, but speaking strictly of masks, this spot goes to Slipknot. Mushroomhead may have come first, but there is no question that Slipknot commercialised their image much more successfully. They expanded upon the masks with matching numbered jumpsuits. They became iconic. Just as one can easily recognize Gene Simmons as a member of Kiss, Shawn “Clown” Crahan simply cannot be mistaken for some guy in Pearl Jam. When you see Slipknot, you know Slipknot. And only they can take the credit for that.
#1: Kathryn Ladano
Biased? Yeah, so what! This is where I defend my choice.
All of the above artists are brilliant and that cannot be disputed. But how many of them incorporate the mask with the music? Perhaps only Buckethead uses the mask to get into a specific headspace to create. Kathryn Ladano’s newest album, also called Masked, explores this. Masks and blindfolds were worn in the studio while music was improvised and captured for the album. The mask becomes part of the audible art, which you cannot say about Slipknot or Crimson Glory. Maybe I’m biased, or maybe I’m one of a few people who knows how critical masks were to the creation of this music. Without the masks, some of this music wouldn’t even exist. For that reason, Kathryn Ladano is our topped masked artist. Nobody else incorporated the mask with the music like she did.
Worthy Mentions
Hey! Where’s Daft Punk? Where’s Deadmau5? Not on this list, that’s where! Neither are Ghost, Thunderstick, the Residents or a number of other groups who wear physical facial coverings. Narrowing down is the hardest part of any list, but I hope you enjoyed this one anyway. Check out some Crimson Glory or Nash the Slash and tell us who you think the greatest masked artists are.
MARILLION – “Made Again (2020)” (2020 iTunes)
It wasn’t that long ago, in this sad year, that Marillion gifted us a new version of “Easter” from their lockdown spaces. Now, from the landmark Brave album, they’ve re-recorded the hopeful “Made Again”.
“I have been here many times before, in the life I used to live…”
Poignant. We’re all grieving for the lives we used to live, some more than others. I’m tiring very quickly of virus-themed songs, like that damn “I know there’ll be better days” ad I keep hearing on the TV. It’s having the opposite effect on me and making me very bitter.
Since “Made Again” was written in 1994, it doesn’t have the stench of 2020 all over it. We know the lyrics are being repurposed but it’s not so bad knowing their old origins.
“Like I woke up from a bad dream, to a brand new world.”
Unlike “Easter” this is a bit more of a complete arrangement, not abbreviated and without shortcuts. You can buy the track for 99 cents on iTunes or watch the video on YouTube. The video was painstakingly assembled from the at-home performance videos and fan footage sent in from all over the world.
We all need some optimism.
“I woke up from a deep sleep,
I woke up from a bad dream,
To a brand new morning,
To a brand new day,
Like the whole world has been made again.”
I hope so, guys. I hope so.
5/5 stars
AMERICAN DAD – “Brave N00b World” (Episode 4, season 17)
Chinese ice cream can save the world. That’s the message of this episode of American Dad.
CIA agent Stan Smith has a new assignment. A North Korean general is expected to be in China for an Overwatch video game competition. Stan and his team must enter the contest and progress through the rounds to assassinate the general, but first he will need his son Steve’s help playing the game and looking like a millennial. Jackson better learn to vape if he wants to fool anyone into thinking he’s young and into Overwatch! If the team can get some Chinese ice cream while there, so much the better.
Unfortunately for Stan and his team (and the world), his attention is split between his son and his assignment. He wasn’t totally honest with Steve, who thinks this is more a father-son trip than a kill-a-North-Korean-general trip. As Stan is learning, focus is key. So how can he split his focus between assignment and son?
Since it’s Stan Smith we’re talking about, you can safely assume he screws it up and the mission goes wrong as usual. But this time, he didn’t just screw it up Stan style. He didn’t even stop at full Sledge Hammer. This time, Stan goes all the to way maximum Rick and Morty, and destroys the entire world.
Smith misses his shot, botching the assassination. China launches their nukes. America retaliates. Mutually assured destruction.
Fortunately, China saved mementos of their heritage in a culture pod, including a cone of delicious Chinese ice cream. So America launches an eagle-headed missile adorned with truck-nuts and blaring “Kickstart My Heart”, and the culture pod is destroyed. Before you can say “Kee-stah-ma-hah”, there is nothing left of the Earth. Nothing but rubble, dust, and ash…and a single scoop of Chinese ice cream, floating in space, past Mars, past the asteroid belt, and into the void.
For one million years, the ice cream floats through the cosmos undisturbed until finally an alien ship happens upon it. What an incredible taste! They must have more. Scans show that Earth suffered an “extinction event”. The only way to get more ice cream is to re-create the Earth and let time do the rest.
The world has a second chance. Will Stan do it differently this time? Will anyone discover the truth of this new reconstructed existence? Will Bill Nye show up at the end to throw cold water all over “Ice Cream-ulation Theory”? You’ll have to watch to find out.
In the B-story, the entire rest of the family gets their heads stuck in the banister, which basically puts Roger, Francine, Hayley and Jeff out of action. The best instalments are usually Roger-centric, but not this time. Perhaps American Dad needed to catch up with Rick and Morty, or perhaps it should try harder to live up to the promise of old episodes like “Lost in Space” or the saga of the Golden Turd. At first it appeared this episode was going to a gamer-based comedy. Then it evolved into something more existential. It can be stated firmly that “Brave N00b World” returns the show to a high point like the good old Mike Barker days.
5/5 stars
These pamphlets showed up at our work mysteriously one morning. Somebody else tossed them in the trash as soon as they realized who provided them!
We already know from Tom Cruise that only a Scientologist can help when there’s a car accident. Perhaps only a Scientologist can prevent Covid-19?
Since I already had the 1986 Saga scheduled all week, I didn’t want to schedule a formal live stream for this weekend like I usually do. Instead I decided to just wing it and go live whenever I felt like it. Streaming periodically through the day like this, we had almost 3 hours of jibber jabber!
This week’s major feature: The “Nigel Tufnel Top Ten” KISS albums list! Special guest star: Uncle Meat.
Lists submitted by:
Len Labelle also sent a list, but I forgot to write it down so we will do his next week!
If you just want to see the KISS lists, you can skip ahead to 2:06:30 of the stream.
If you want to hear me rip an epic fart point blank into the microphone in stereo, skip ahead to 1:52:30 of the stream.
If you’d like to hear my mom’s reaction to Uncle Meat’s attraction to my sister, skip to 0:57:10 of the stream.
If you want to see Deke move and speak in real life, skip to 2:46:15 of the stream. This is his very first appearance, ANYWHERE – you’re welcome for the start and the boost. Hope it is appreciated.
If you’re just interested in the Star Wars action figures, you’ll want to watch from 0:12:45 of the stream.
Hope you enjoyed this as much as I did!
mikeladano.com 