RECORD STORE TALES Part 305: The Return of the Wiseman
Seeing Wiseman at Sausagefest XIII brought back a flood of memories. Some I can share, some I definitely cannot! I didn’t think I’d ever see the cat again, but it truly is a small world after all.
He was a party animal, that guy, and presumably he still is. Nice guy, smart too, but when he tied one on, he didn’t do it in half-measures. Partying for him was the full Monty. So here are two things I remembered about the guy:
1.Bacontinis. Like a Martini, but with bacon instead of olives. Count on Wiseman to try something like this, years and years before the current bacon trends. Now people are trying bacon in everything, thanks to people like Epic Meal Time. Wiseman was way ahead of the times when it came to alcoholic beverages.
2. Christmas. I was scheduled to work the evening shift on December 23, with Wiseman. He initially wanted the night off, because he had a “Christmas party” to attend. Getting the night off wasn’t possible due to scheduling, so he came to his shift fully prepared to party afterwards. He packed everything he needed, so he could go straight to the party afterwards.
For Wiseman, these crucial party supplies included a sleeping bag, copious amounts of liquor, a hose, and a funnel. I kid you not. Like I said, Wiseman didn’t do parties in half-measures.
I was glad to see at Sausagefest XIII that Wiseman hasn’t killed himself yet. It’s comforting to know he’s still out there, bringing the party wherever he goes.
QUEEN + ADAM LAMBERT – Live, July 13 2014 at the Air Canada Center, Toronto
I have to start off this review by saying I love Queen. I have listened to more songs by Queen than almost any band ever. I am told when people I know hear Queen, Steve Miller Band, Black Sabbath or 80’s metal, they think of me. So the review you are about to read really pains me to write. But I have to be true to myself and review the band as I saw them last night.
I went to this concert expecting to hate every little bit of Adam Lambert. I hated him on American Idol. Yes, I know. I hate to admit it, but for a while I did watch that show. How, you say, can a died-in-the-wool metal head and 70’s hard rock lover watch American Idol? Well. To answer that question, my family time TV viewing was limited to the type of shows we could watch together. Having a young pre-teen in the house meant only watching family type shows when she was awake. And she loved American Idol. At first I liked Adam Lambert. He was not your typical contestant on that show. But then he started showing off his pipes too much, and it got annoying. All of the viewers knew precisely when he was going to wail, and we got sick of him.
Then I heard the news that he was going to be the next lead singer for Queen.
Queen and American Idol. That is sacrilege. This would be like Gary Cherone in Van Halen. It wouldn’t work. It couldn’t work.
However, it did.
I hate to say this, but the three shining spots of the concert last night really had nothing at all to do with the original line up of Queen.
First, Adam Lambert was actually great. If Freddie Mercury was incredible, then Adam Lambert was great. He was spot on. He was campy, in a Freddie kind of way, and his voice was in top shape.
Second, Neil Fairclough, the bass player they hired to replace the retired John Deacon was amazing. His stand up electric bass was the biggest bass I have ever seen. It sounded sweet. And then he let Roger Taylor use drumsticks to play the bass (a first for me).
Third, Rufus Tiger Taylor. He is the son of Roger Taylor. And he has some serious chops. I didn’t realize how good he was until my wife pointed out to me that he was better than his dad. And last night, he was.
The concert was going along great, and then Adam Lambert left the stage, and the show for me mostly fell apart.
Please don’t get me wrong I love Brian May, but he was mostly off last night. His entire night sounded about a half second behind. His finger work was slow. His guitar solo (which was roughly 30 minutes) was about 28 minutes too long. It started out with a few minutes of Pink Floyd , then onto some Zeppelin, back to Floyd. I don’t think he was trying to copy David Gilmour or Jimmy Page, but the elements were there. At least I hope he wasn’t trying to copy them because he was doing a piss poor version if he was. For a guy that has seen many guitar virtuosos over the years, this was like watching a Junior High guitar talent show. The worst part for me was when Brian May screwed up in “Bohemian Rhapsody”. It was a real fingernails on the chalkboard moment for me.
During the song “Love of My Life”, Brian moved down to the front of the stage alone with an acoustic guitar. He admits he is not a singer. Well, Brian we quickly figured out why. Your voice was awful. God awful. And you chose to have the audience sing the other half of the lyrics of the song. You could have heard a pin drop when the 100 or so people in the entire audience of 15,000 that actually knew the lyrics were singing (whispering?). Here’s a hint. Choose a song most of the audience knows if you want them to sing the lyrics for you, or put the lyrics up on a screen.
Coming from the area of the world where Neil Peart is from, and having seen Rush in concert many times (and more recently seeing how good Tommy Clufetos can bang the skins), the drumming of Roger Taylor was another let down. It wasn’t bad. It just didn’t wow me. But in 2014, solos really are passé unless you are really amazing, and Roger Taylor was not. He does not have a great singing voice either, which really showed when he tried to fill in for David Bowie during “Under Pressure”.
His son is a real up and comer though, and I hope he finds his own way in the music industry. It seems especially tough on children of famous musicians.
After the horrible “Love of My Life”, Brian May talked about space travel and how we were all going on a journey and we may never come back, then all of the musicians(other than Lambert) went to the front of the stage and did “’39”. Pardon me while I yawn.
Please Adam, come back and save us from this snooze fest. As the lights go down and the audience sees Adam there is a huge cheer.
However, after a couple of classic Queen songs, they forced him to sing a remix of a little known Freddie Mercury disco song called “Love Kills”. He announced Queen was using this version in an upcoming album. In my opinion, they should do a new album with new material, perhaps throwing in a few B-sides of old material, or do a live album. They could include Freddie, Paul Rodgers, Freddie Tribute Concert songs and Adam. Just my two cents. Also in my opinion, the band had plenty of time to come out with this new album before the tour, but they didn’t. And all they had for sale at the swag booths were $40 T-shirts. I have enough T-shirts thanks. Not one CD or vinyl. Nothing.
The entire show for me was like “backwards day”. I assumed Brian May and Roger Taylor would be the highlight of the show. I told my wife the only reason I am going was to hear Brian May. But the cast of nobodies were better.
I should end the review by stating the whole is better than the sum of its parts for Queen + Adam Lambert. When they are together doing classic Queen songs, they sound great. When they do solos, and off-key singing, it didn’t work.
If they had included 8-10 more songs, and skipped a lot of the solos, I would have rated it higher.
My wife summed up the concert when we got back to the car by stating she liked The Lady Gaga concert a few nights before better (No, thankfully I did not attend that one). I told her “Don’t say that!”
For me, Adam Lambert was 8.5/10, the band without Adam 4/10, so together the show was 7.5/10. Too bad. It could have been much better.
[This works out to3.75/5on the five-point LeBrain scale. Thank you Boppin for this amazing review! — LeBrain]
TRAILER PARK BOYS – The Complete Third Season (2003 Alliance Atlantis)
By season 3, Trailer Park Boys was a bonafide hit show, and running on all cylinders. The confidence that Clattenberg and crew had was obvious in season 3. The writers had hit threir stride here, and produced eight of their best episodes. Granted, there are very few bad Trailer Park Boys episodes, but none of them were in season 3. Season 3 also presents the first true classic episode, “Closer To The Heart” featuring guest star Alex Lifeson of Rush.
Ricky and Julian are, once again, out of jail. They are also rich thanks to their dope sale from the previous season. Julian begins a vodka bootlegging business, and Ricky applies for the position of assistant trailer park supervisor, now that Randy has been suspended. Lahey and Ricky working together? You know that’s not going to turn out well.
Before long, Julian comes up with the idea of committing a series of small crimes, so they won’t get caught, and saving the money for a big cruise. Stealing gas and opening an illegal gas station in the park seems like a good idea. This leads to the first-ever big Ricky courtroom scene of the series. If you haven’t seen one of these, believe me, Ricky’s courtroom scenes are always a highlight.
Meanwhile, Julian starts dating a cop, and J-Roc starts jacking other rappers tunes (he calls it “cross promoting”). This leads to the debut of new character DVS (Detroit Velvet Smooth…from Moncton), who comes to Sunnyvale looking for reckoning. Seeing Bubbles rapping during a moment of crisis is another highlight of the season, as is finding out what J-Roc is really like under that headband.
Then, one day, Bubbles finds that Rush are playing at the Metro Centre. He asks Ricky to go get him a ticket, with the only money he has. That gets all cocked up, so Ricky decides that to compensate Bubbles, by having Rush do a concert in the park. Just for them. How do you do that? You start by “borrowing” one of the band members.
By the end of the season, the entire world of the Trailer Park Boys has been turned upside down, and things will be drastically different in season 4. It’s all funny, it’s all quality, it’s all good. Truly, season 3 was one of the best seasons of this show, and is actually a great place for non-fans to start watching. It is easily accessible and loaded with witty writing, inspired improvised dialogue, and great stories.
Pick up season 3 if you don’t have it already. For new fans, this is a great place to get into the series.
Part one of my new series: the Trailer Park Boys complete television series. In anticipation of the forthcoming seasons 8 & 9, we’re going to be taking a look at the original series that started it all.
For those who don’t know Trailer Park Boys, there are some serious rock n’ roll connections throughout the series. Stick around and we’ll be talking about Sebastian Bach, Helix, Rush of course, and plenty more.
TRAILER PARK BOYS – Big Plans, Little Brains: The Complete 1st and 2nd Seasons (2002 Alliance Atlantis)
Julian is an ex-con who calls Sunnyvale Trailer Park in Nova Scotia, Canada home. He has just been released from jail, and he’s vowed to clean up his life. Go straight. Ditch his bad influences. The premise of Trailer Park Boys is that a camera crew has offered to make a documentary about Julian’s life, and will be following Julian around the trailer park. Julian is determined to stay straight and not go back behind bars. His best friend Ricky, however, doesn’t have that same commitment to the straight life.
Trailer Park Boys took a season to find its feet, like many other series. By the end of the first season (only six episodes), it had definitely done so. Hang on folks, because the first and second seasons are just the beginning of what will turn out to be a pretty crazy series of mockumentary episodes.
In the beginning, the character of Bubbles (easily the funniest and most lovable of the boys) isn’t in the spotlight. Obviously, Mike Clattenberg and company realized Bubbles’ potential partway through the first season and began writing him larger parts. Also introduced in this season are Mr. Lahey and Randy, the trailer park supervisor and his assistant, who are not quite as drunk and stoned as they would get later on. Love interests Lucy and Sarah are here, not yet the adversaries to Ricky and Julian that they would become. Cory and Trevor are sidekicks (aka “jail cover”), and J-Roc and his “Roc-Pile” make their debut. Characters introduced that are later forgotten include Levi and Mrs. Peterson (who is like a grandmother to Julian). The dangerous Cyrus also makes his debut in the first episode, as a recurring antagonist.
The story arc: Ricky and Julian return from jail to find the park has changed — Cyrus has taken over. All the criminal activities that Julian used to run in the park have now been assumed by Cyrus. He’s even occupying Julian’s trailer. The boys must somehow get rid of Cyrus without going back to jail. In the meantime, Julian decides to head to community college, and that means Ricky is persona-non-grata around him. J-Roc makes some cash on the side making “greasy” porno tapes, which Ricky thinks might be a good thing for him to star in (it’s not). It’s all a build up to Ricky proposing to Lucy to finally be a good father and family man. It all comes crashing down at Ricky’s wedding which closes season 1.
While season 1 takes a while to build up speed, season 2 is full-on TPB. The verbal trainwrecks known as “Rickisms” abound. Bubbles has become integrated as one of the main three. The get-rich quick schemes are now fully formed (or at least as fully-formed as they ever get on this show) and Lahey is a total fucking drunk. Season 2 sure hit the ground running with full confidence and skill.
Yes, I used the word skill — to execute dialogue off-the-cuff like this and create such lovable characters out of criminals takes skill. The execution of this show is such that they make it look easy. I once heard it said that you have to be really smart to pull off a really dumb character.
Once again, Ricky and Julian have returned from jail. Once again, the park has changed for the worse. Lahey’s drunk and in neglect of his duties as trailer park supervisor. As a consequence, the park has turned to shit. Sam Losco (who lives in a camper, not even a full trailer) is seeking to be elected the new supervisor. This would be very bad for Ricky and Julian. With drunk Lahey around, it’s easy for Ricky to grow dope. Sam Losco won’t make it that simple for them. New character Barb Lahey (Mr. Lahey’s ex-wife and owner of the park) and Treena Lahey, played by newcomer (!) Ellen Page add a new element to the show.
Since Lahey’s drunk out of his tree, it’s the perfect time for Ricky to start growing dope again (“Freedom 35, boys!”). All is almost derailed by some greasy Bible pimps, some dope-eating insects, new antagonist Sam Losco, and once again, Cyrus. Other schemes this season involve J-Roc’s illegal night club in the trailer park, which does not go according to plan.
Lots of DVD bonus features are included, and the best one is the Tragically Hip video for “The Darkest One” starring the boys and Don Cherry! Great song. Lots of alternate and extended takes are included, and as an easter egg, the very first Bubbles short called “Cart Boy”.
The only negative thing I have to say is regarding the packaging. My case broke the day I brought it home, and so did those of some friends of mine.
5/5 stars
Winner – Best use of a crane shot in a music video – 2003 LeBrain Music Video Awards
Thanks again Windows Movie Maker for not messing up this video. This is the last video I’ll be using Movie Maker to create. Thanks Seb for the new software.
Part II features the first ever live performance of “The Maiden Song” written by Seb, Dave and Meat. Yours truly on second vocals.
AN INTERNET FIRST:LeBrain and theHeavy Metal OverloRd have combined forces to bring you our very first co-review! We have chosen the rare album album byFunky Junction — a little known outfit better recognized under the nameThin Lizzy! Perhaps you have heard of them.
For the purposes of this review,LeBrain will be in black and HMO will be in blue.
FUNKY JUNCTION – Play a Tribute to Deep Purple (1973 Damont)
HMO: I like a challenge. Ever since hearing about Mike’s “Holy Grail” list of rarities I’ve been determined to find some for him here in Scotland. Given that I’m Scottish, this obsession with Holy Grails probably makes me Sean Connery to his Indiana Jones. Or something like that. At any rate, I’ll be calling him “Junior” from now on. I saw this record in Glasgow’s Missing Records and, knowing the hidden Thin Lizzy connection, I emailed Mike to see if he had it. He replied that it was on his Holy Grail list! Ya dancer! On closer inspection, however, the shop-copy looked too scratched to be worth even the £2.50 asking price. But the discovery gave me hope that I might find a better copy for him online… and here it is!
LeBrain: The band on the front cover wasn’t them. Their names appear nowhere on the LP packaging. All we’re told on the record jacket is that Funky Junction “are an exciting new group that has the pulse of today.” But for all intents and purposes, Funky Junction was Thin Lizzy:
Phil Lynott – bass guitar
Brian Downey – drums
Eric Bell – guitar
Benny White – vocals
Dave Lennox – keyboards
Since Phil Lynott couldn’t sing Ian Gillan’s high notes, and since Thin Lizzy didn’t have a keyboard player, the band hired members of another Irish group called Elmer Fudd to record the album, which they did in one day!
“Fireball” is one of my favourite Deep Purple tracks. Even though Eric Bell referred to singer Benny White as an “Ian Gillan” clone, I don’t hear that at all. A Rod Evans clone, perhaps. “Fireball” is largely based on the drums, so we’re in safe territory here. Brian Downey is one of the few drummers who could give Ian Paice a run for his money in 1973. Not a bad cover I suppose, if you’re eager to hear was “Fireball” would have sounded like with Rod Evans singing.
Totally agree with you on the singer. The guy is so Rod Evans he was probably wearing gold lamé trousers while he was singing this. It’s an ok version in a “pub covers band” sort-of way. Brian Downey’s drumming is impressive, Phil’s bass solo… not so much.
“Dan” (credited to the German business man, Leo Muller, that conceived of and financed this project) is brief guitar instrumental. It’s supposed to sound like “Danny Boy” in a Hendrixian style, and I suppose that’s the right ballpark. Eric Bell fans will dig it, but as a song…next!
I like Eric’s tone here but it’s a lazy arrangement: just playing the melody and wanging his bar every now and again. It’s definitely the most Lizzy-esque song here though.
Funky Junction settle into a light groove on “Black Night”. This is a pretty faithful cover. What I like about this performance is Eric Bell’s way of improvising his own guitar solo within the style that Blackmore set for this song. The organ solo however is pretty caveman by comparison to Jon Lord. Pretty stock cover.
I’m actually fairly impressed by how faithful this one is, and a good approximation of the sound too. Eric Bell and Brian Downey are still the classiest acts here but it doesn’t have anywhere near the edge of the Purple original. Still, one of the more enjoyable outings here.
I like that I can hear Phil Lynott’s personal bass style on “Palamatoon” but the lame keyboards sound out of place on this album. I don’t know how to describe this instrumental original except to say that, as usual, Eric Bell’s soloing is a highlight.
It’s cool to hear Phil on this. His bass line reminded me of “Little Girl in Bloom” a bit. It’s just a shame that this tune is so bad. It’s like Emerson Lake and Palmer but pissed as farts. John Peel once described ELP as “a waste of talent and electricity”. He was wrong. But this song definitely is.
“Strange Kind of Woman” is pretty limp. Once again, if you were eager to hear this Purple classic performed by a Rod Evans clone, this is the one. Downey and Bell are the highlights of a pretty dull performance.
I’m finding the Rod Evans factor to be one of the more interesting aspects of this. If it wasn’t so workaday you could almost imagine these are some long-lost Deep Purple sessions from before they gave poor Rod the heave-ho. But apart from the “what if?” fantasising… dull.
Side two commences with the Deep Purple Mk I hit, “Hush” (actually a Billy Joe Royal cover). I find this one irritating. The singer’s enunciation bugs me. Deep Purple decided to anchor their version with a long keyboard solo. Unfortunately Funky Junction struggle to make their solo as interesting.
I think I liked this one more than you, Junior. This and Black Night are the two best Purple covers here. Not very inspiring on record but if they were playing it live at a pub I think I’d get into it. Benny sounds totally at home here, finally giving it the full, glorious Rod Evans. Probably with bouffant hair and a frilly shirt now too! Gaun’ yersel’ big man!
Even though we all know “Rising Sun” is a cover of “House of the Rising Sun” (a traditional), here Leo Muller takes songwriting credit! I hope he enjoyed what little royalties he earned from the meager sales of this LP. This is another instrumental cover, with a snooze-inducing ending.
Cheeky scamp that Leo Muller, eh? I’m surprised he didn’t just change his name to Traditional and watch the money flood in. Nice sound and a decent performance on this song but mostly goes in one ear and out the other.
I appreciate that Funky Junction chose to retain that noisy, messy intro to “Speed King”. I’m afraid that of all the songs, “Speed King” suffers the most from the inadequate singer. Fortunately the Lizzy guys are talented enough to play the tune properly.
Everything we’ve mentioned previously seems to work against them on Speed King. The caveman keyboards, the tameness. And the poor Rod Evans impersonator sounding like all your worst Karaoke nightmares (but with the added embarrassment of those trousers). It’s cool that they included the noisy intro (I think Leo Muller wrote that) but this is the worst Purple version here by a good margin.
“Corina” closes the album, a vocal track credited to Muller. It’s a cool blues that fits in with a Deep Purple Mk I vibe. I don’t mind this track too much. It’s nothing special but at least it’s not overshadowed by a superior Deep Purple version.
An OK boogie. It’s still making me think of pubs mostly. The lead guitar is the best thing about this one.
2/5 stars. Recommended primarily to fans of Eric Bell.
2.5/5 stars. I agree with Mike but I’m going to throw in an extra half-point because I thought the Rod Evans impersonator was a hoot.
“Fireball” (Ritchie Blackmore, Ian Gillan, Roger Glover, Jon Lord, Ian Paice)
RECORD STORE TALES Part 304: The Richard Parker Files
Don’t you hate it when you see an able-bodied driver flagrantly park his or her vehicle in a no-parking zone? That’s one that drives me nuts. For example, at one of the local malls, you’ll see people constantly parking in the lane where the NO PARKING signs are quite clearly visible. They run into the cash machine and run out again, even though there is a 15 minute parking spot available right near the cash machines, that is always empty.
Obviously these people must be in a rush. They may feel like they are more important than you or me and everyone else who actually properly parks their vehicle in a spot. It might be a fire lane, but no firetrucks were about to pull up, were they?
Maybe it’s just the asshole in me, but I didn’t like to see that in the Record Store Days. Once in a while, I wouldn’t serve a customer who parked in front of the store. Especially when I can see dozens of empty spots mere meters away. My store was not in a busy plaza. There were always close spots available. The laziness and attitude of entitlement really ground my gears.
I recall one instance very clearly. A young man pulled up to my store one store morning, and parked on the curb. There were NO PARKING signs along that curb that he chose to ignore. He came in with a bag of CDs for me to buy.
“Hi. How are you? I want to sell these,” he said.
“Sure!” I said with a broad smile. “Why don’t you go and move your car to a parking spot, and I’ll get right on it.”
He paused a moment, but had no problem with my request. “Sure, I’ll be right back,” he said. We did the transaction and I had no problems with the guy. I just politely asked him to move his car for me to proceed, and he did. No big deal.
I didn’t do that often. You could tell when the customer wouldn’t have listened to you anyway. But I looked at it as a service. Once, a guy got ticketed right out front and he didn’t notice. I was working at another location, with a more cramped parking lot. Likewise the curb lane was also narrower. It pissed me off when people parked in it, making it hard for others to get around, but it happened every day.
This guy pulled up, parked on the curb, and shopped around. I saw the parking control person outside the window, writing tickets. I laughed to myself. The customer was too busy looking for CDs to notice, even though his car was right out the window.
The parking control lady left a nice ticket on his windshield. The driver was in my store for about half an hour, and didn’t notice until he was done. I had to chuckle. That’s what happens when you’re a Richard Parker.
Without further adieu, I present to you the Top 75 songs from this year’s Countdown. Only a handful of my songs made the Countdown this year: Sound City Players‘ “Your Wife is Calling”, Black Sabbath‘s “Damaged Soul”, “Hush” by Deep Purple, Dio‘s “Rainbow in the Dark”, and “Stonehenge” by Spinal Tap.
I love this album. Nightflight sounds like the kind of music I was exposed to, when I was growing in Kitchener, Ontario in the early 80’s. I was surrounded by new and exciting music, thanks to stations like MuchMusic, and friends who would let me tape their records. If I had been aware of Budgie in the 80’s, I absolutely would have been a fan.
In their early days, similarly to Thin Lizzy, Budgie started out with a prototypical sound and eventually evolved into a more metallic beast. Nightflight is Budgie’s Thunder and Lightning, perhaps. It has that vibe, and it’s awesome. Of the records I own, this is my favourite Budgie album. Burke’s voice is as nasal as ever, in the best possible way. The band has metamorphosed into something more mainstream metal, which still sounding like classic Budgie. That anchoring bass, the unstoppable grooves, and the simple and smoking solos: it’s still there.
The opening track “I Turned To Stone” is a major highlight. It takes balls to open an album with a song this soft, but eventually the ballad-like tune transforms into an Iron Maiden-gallup with this killer off-kilter guitar solo. “Keeping a Rendezvous” is more accessible; Budgie plundering hard rock with equal success. The organ-infested “Reaper of the Glory” is a brief step back in quality. It lacks the memorable melodies of the first two songs.
“She Used Me Up” kicks ass with a steady AC/DC beat and a choppy Priest-ly riff (circa Point of Entry). “Don’t Lay Down and Die” continues this overall direction. You can hear the organ once again, and the guitar solo is catchy as hell. It is very much in an 80’s metal mold.
My favourite track is “Apparatus”. The lyrics are pretty strange, but this ballad is irresistible. Burke’s earnest lead vocal is high pitched nasal perfection. But if you didn’t like “Apparatus”, that’s OK because “Superstar” is likely to blow you away. Budgie again stray into AC/DC territory. This song anticipates Blow Up Your Video by several years. Steve Williams keeps it simple on the drums and that’s what makes it cool.
The mid-tempo and melodic “Change Your Ways” is just as likable. You’ll dig the gang-of-Burke lead vocal technique on the verses. You have to admire a singer who has his own voice, and doesn’t resemble anyone else. It’s easy to compare Burke to Geddy Lee, but that’s really not doing it justice. Both singers have their own techniques. Burke is more soulful.
“Untitled Lullaby” is pretty much what it sounds like it would be. It’s one of Burke’s acoustic ditties, only 1:16 so really it’s just a coda. It’s lovely and it ends the album on an upbeat note. Nightflight is a short but enjoyable ride.
Upon review, I found seven of Nightflight‘s nine tracks to be indispensable to me. Based on that math and rounding up:
mikeladano.com 