BRIAN MAY – “Too Much Love Will Kill You” (1992 EMI/Parlophone CD single)
The first time that most of us heard “Too Much Love Will Kill You” was in 1992, at the Freddie Mercury tribute concert. Surely one of the biggest and most spectacular such events ever hosted, Queen played a scorching set with guests that night. One of the highlights was a song that Brian May humbly said was the best he had to offer. That song was the ballad “Too Much Love Will Kill You”, which Queen recorded but did not release on The Miracle (until 2022). For that album, the band chose to only include songs written solely by the four core members. “Too Much Love Will Kill You” was co-written by Brian with Elizabeth Lamers and Frank Musker. A few months after the concert, May would release his solo version of the song on his album, Back to the Light, and also as a single. (There is now a deluxe edition of Back to the Light, containing all the songs from this single.)
“I’m just the pieces of the man I used to be,” croons May after a a delicate intro. A song about being torn between two lovers, you somehow actually feel sorry for the guy who’s trying to choose between two women. “Too much love will kill you, just as sure as none at all.” May’s version is different from Queen’s, with lush orchestration taking up much of the space. It’s absolutely gorgeous! Queen’s version was as well, and it may be difficult to choose between versions. Brian takes a lovely acoustic guitar solo, which is so rarely heard from the master of electric layers of bliss. His vocals are impassioned, perhaps even more than Freddie’s were. Though loaded to the gills with strings and accoutrements, it’s a spellbinding version.
Second on the single is a rocker named “I’m Scared”. If it were a Queen song, it would be one of the harder-edged. It’s a speedy ride through an amusement part of guitar and drums (by Cozy Powell, with bass by his Black Sabbath and Whitesnake compatriot Neil Murray). Brian talk-sings for most of it, which works well, especially when he mockingly has trouble getting his words out towards the end. It’s a performance, and the chorus ain’t bad regardless of the vocal storytelling. It’s too weird for radio, but could be one of those cool deep cuts.
Track three is the “guitar version” of “Too Much Love With Kill You” which, believe it or not, is an instrumental. Brian’s electric guitar takes the place of the singer. It’s a cool and unexpected version. It’s an incredible, lyrical version. Brian takes liberties and doesn’t play the vocal melody note for note, but you can make it out just the same. This could be one of May’s greatest guitar performances, simply because he uses his instrument to speak in a way that very few guitarists can do for four minutes straight. He changes voices, he adds luscious trills, and it’s an absolute knockout.
The last track is a re-do of lead single “Driven By You”, with Cozy and Neil. Brian played bass on the album version. This version is hard and punchy. The song is a melodic rock classic. If it had come out a couple years earlier, it could have been a summer hit. Cozy and Neil were in Brian’s live band, so having them re-do the track for a B-side probably made sense. It’s really strong, and the bass and drums are both in your face. Diehard fans will absolutely be able to recognize the legendary rhythm section. Cozy in particular has a signature sound, and Neil does as well to a lesser degree.
What a great single, combining rarities with hits and a deep cut. A total score.
I’ve never hid my disappointment that Skid Row have been unable to hang into a lead singer for long since Sebastian Bach’s 1996 ouster. Johnny Solinger was their best shot at a permanent lead singer, since replaced by a dizzying array of vocalists. Erik Grönwall, from Swedish Idol and H.E.A.T., was probably the biggest hope. Sadly, as a cancer survivor, Erik was forced to resign and focus on his health. The one album he made with Skid Row, The Gang’s All Here, received critical acclaim in 2022 and was called Album of the Year by several outlets.
Erik Grönwall brings the necessary range and power, more so than Solinger. Unfortunately, both Solinger and Bach had a lot of character in their voices. Grönwall has a more generic sound, and this robs Skid Row of some of what made them special. He almost sounds too good, too professional.
A lot of people will disagree and that’s fine. We’re all entitled to our opinions.
Only two songs here, “Time Bomb” (sort of a punky rewrite of “Piece of Me”) and “The Gang’s All Here”, made it onto the tour setlist. 80% of the album was not played live. There are shout-along choruses, Kiss-like guitar licks, and Bolan’s bass bounce…but do the songs stick to the brain like albums of yore? Some do. The best moments are the ones that recall the past, such as “Resurrected” which has a “Monkey Business” familiarity. Unfortunately, the trite lyrics are another one of those “we’re back where we belong” kind of songs.
The strongest song is the ballad “October’s Song”, which comes closest to nailing the timeless Skid Row level of quality. Grönwall’s schooled approach to singing is opposed to Bach’s desperate passion to blow down the biggest of buildings, but that was a long time ago, and Bach is never coming back. “October’s Song” has some great riffage and should have been made a permanent part of the setlist. You’ll not find a better song among the new ones. We’ll say it right here: this song stands up against the back catalogue, even the intense Slave to the Grind ballads.
Credit due: Skid Row almost go activist on the environmental message song “World On Fire”.
Much of the album was written with previous singer Z.P. Theart, of Dragonforce. Core Skid Row members “Snake” Sabo, Scotty Hill, and Rachel Bolan handle the majority of songwriting, retaining Rob Hammersmith on drums.
If you want a new Skid Row album that you can pump your fist to, stomp your feet, or bang your head, then The Gang’s All Here is a must-buy. If you were hoping for a Skid Row album that you’ll remember for years like Slave to the Grind, Subhuman Race, or even Thickskin, then the jury is still out. Thickskin had way better songs – there, I said it!
It was a marathon, but it was never dull! With Pete Jones on board, we completely dissected every track on these two 40 year old albums:
Judas Priest – Defenders of the Faith – 13 January 1984 – peaked at #18 in the US and went platinum. Produced by Tom Allom, his fifth with Priest.
Iron Maiden – Powerslave – 3 Sept 1984 – peaked at #21 in the US and went platinum. Produced by Martin Birch, his fourth with Maiden.
Harrison Kopp arrived at the end of the show and between he, Peter and myself, we chose a winner. It was a 2-1 vote.
Lyrically and musically we broke down each track to the individual parts. We shone light and appreciation on all the players, for what they contributed to each of these epic metal masterpieces. At the end of the day, it was clear that though both bands are often lumped together, these two albums are completely different. They have different moods, different directions, and different lyrical themes. Both are important albums to 80s metal, and to the respective band catalogues.
Subject matter broken down in detail:
The bass, drum, and guitar parts to each song.
Lyrical themes to each song and album.
The B-sides and bonus tracks.
The true and hilarious story behind Mission From ‘Arry.
Connections between Becket and Iron Maiden.
Personal stories and impact of these records.
Live performances and songs that have never been played live.
You will also be treated to a live performance of “Freewheel Burning” by Mike!
They call Peter the Professor and for good reason. He came prepared with tour information and intimate knowledge of the construction of these songs.
Though it pained me to have to pick a winner, we did!
We hope you enjoyed the show, and a big thank-you to Peter for contributing two hours of your Friday night! Of course, always nice to see Harrison.
This is likely the last evening show of the summer of 2024. Afternoon shows occur at 3:00 PM on Fridays, when I have an available co-host. Thanks for watching, and stay tuned…
The next show is an interview with author Angie Moon, regarding her debut music/true time book, Crime of the Century, June 21 on Grab A Stack of Rock!
This album, recorded during what I consider to be Blue Rodeo’s jammy psychedelic phase, is one of my favourites (it’s up there with the preceding Five Days and Tremolo, to which it is related). It isn’t an album to like instantly, but only through multiple listens. It suddenly clicked with me after seeing the band play these songs live.
This album began life during writing sessions in 1993, but the band was so inspired with some spontaneous new songs, they ended up writing and recording Five Days In July in, well…five days in July. That album was released first, and the band later returned to the other songs written during that period. Five Days was a huge hit, so when Blue Rodeo finally got back to making this album, the difference took fans by surprise. (Some of the leftovers became the similarly jammy but acoustic Tremolo, such as “Moon & Tree”, which was once more psychedelic and electric.)
When I saw the band live on this tour, they blew me away. I hadn’t seen them live since the 1991 Casino tour, so this was my first exposure to the new six-man lineup. Greg Keelor was on fire, playing gonzo Young-esque feedback-laden solos that lasted up to five minutes. It was incredible. This album distills that kind of sound down to 5 and 6 minute songs.
The first two tracks, “Save Myself” and “Girl In Green” were not about to become hit singles, as both are slow and melancholy. “Save Myself” is painstakingly slow, much like Greg’s first solo album, while “Girl In Green” is funky with a powerful, almost yelled chorus, backed by James Gray’s organ. Both songs are winners to this listener, because they are completely noncommercial, while retaining melody and tons of emotion.
Interestingly: There was both a 12″ and promo CD single of “Girl In Green”, a rare trance-y “Space Knowledge” remix. Very cool, very weird — I have both.
“What You Want” sounds a lot more like traditional Rodeo, Jim’s first upbeat rocker of the album. Greg’s hit single “Side of the Road” is track 4, a moody 6-minute tour-de-force with an incredible chorus and plenty of solos.
Like a one-two punch, Jim comes back with “Better Off As We Are”, possibly the best song on the album, if not the best rock song that Cuddy’s ever written. I love Jim’s lyrics; conversations with his brother and recollections of young adulthood. Such power in the performance!
My older brother he left the day he finished school, moved down to New York to Washington Square. he calls me up and says you should come and see me, watch the waves of people rolling everywhere.
“Sky” slows things down a bit, a Jim ballad with a slow tempo that sounds more like something from Greg territory. That ended side 1 of the original LP,
and side 2 began just as slowly with Greg’s “Brown-Eyed Dog”. Great chorus, with comatose verses that may put the unprepared to sleep. Then Jim’s “Blew It Again” is a sad
ballad, lyrically similar to “Bad Timing”, but musically based on a catchy little piano line.
“Get Through To You” follows, which features Greg waking up and letting rip again with an uptempo rocker. This song, one of Greg’s best, is kind of similar to Jim’s catchy tunes on side one. Jim’s “Armour” is another plaintive ballad as only Jim can do, and perhaps should have been a single, as it could have been a hit.
The album closes with two more slow ones, “Train” and the eight-minute-plus “Flaming Bed”. These songs drone off into the distance, meandering lazily, like the hot humid July that spawned them. This ends an album that is largely misunderstood as ignored by the general record buying public. And a shame that is.
As you can see, this isn’t the light-hearted countryfied Blue Rodeo of Casino or Outskirts. Greg’s health problems (diabetes) coincided with an interest in slowing things down, and that’s what this album is. It will either click with you, or it won’t, depending on the setting. Find the right place and time, however, and you will enjoy a surprising listening experience, full of depth and emotion, melody and lots of meandering jams.
I suggest listening during an evening, on the porch. In July.
5/5 stars
Of note, if there’s a third voice in the background that’s sounds familiar, it should: It’s Sarah McLachlan.
TWISTED SISTER – The Best of the Atlantic Years (2016 Atlantic)
Nobody likes buying the same thing twice, so Twisted Sister have ensured this “greatest hits” album is vastly different from their other stand-by, 1992’s Big Cuts & Nasty Cuts. That album boasted a side of live B-sides, now collected as Live at the Marquee. As such, it only had 10 studio tracks, whereas this new compilation has 17 plus a previously unreleased bonus.
The repeated songs are the obvious ones:
“I’ll Never Grow Up, Now!”
“You Can’t Stop Rock ‘N’ Roll”
“I Am (I’m Me)”
“The Kids Are Back”
“I Wanna Rock”
“We’re Not Gonna Take It”
“The Price”
That leaves a whole lotta songs, including a few singles, that you’ll find here but not on Big Hits. Notably though, that means this compilation doesn’t have “Shoot ‘Em Down”, “Under the Blade”, or “Bad Boys of Rock ‘N’ Roll”.
What makes this compilation a little more special is that the tracks go almost chronologically, and don’t skimp out on songs from Come Out and Play, or Love Is for Suckers. Founding guitarist Jay Jay French mentioned in the liner notes that Suckers was supposed to be a Snider solo album, but we do get two songs.
Opening with Twisted’s first Atlantic album Under the Blade, we are treated to the 1985 remixes of “What You Don’t Know (Sure Can Hurt You)”, “I’ll Never Grow Up, Now!” and “Sin After Sin”. It’s a nice one-two-three punch, with “I’ll Never Grow Up, Now!” being a bubble gum punk sandwich, stuck between two heavy metal hard hitters. It’s actually a nice change of pace, getting the echo-laden remixes this time.
The heavy metal assault continues with what might be my favourite Twisted song of all time: “You Can’t Stop Rock ‘N’ Roll”.
“Like a charging bull, it’s a juggernaut, With steam at full, never to be caught, Incarnate power, roaring from the sky, While others cower, rock ain’t gonna die.”
The slow intro, the chugging riff, the pounding drums of the late great A.J. Pero (my favourite member as a kid) and the roar of Dee Snider made this the perfect heavy metal song to entice a young teenager back in the 80s. “You Can’t Stop Rock ‘N’ Roll” is part of a trio included from the same-titled album, joined by melodic metal masterpieces “I Am (I’m Me)” and “The Kids Are Back”. When Twisted went all melodic, they drew upon classic influences, but combined with the heavy guitars, they almost sound like precursors to pop-punk. In many regards, Twisted Sister were ahead of their time. It’s a simple recipe: Guitars chug, bass joins them, drums throw in some catchy fills, and Dee Snider delivers the hooks with the band on backing vocals. Simple, but difficult to master.
The largest clutch of songs obviously comes from Stay Hungry, with six. The three big singles are the obvious ones, but also thrown in are the classic deep cuts “Burn In Hell”, “The Beast” and “S.M.F.” In these songs, you get the heavier side of “Stay Hungry”, minus the title track itself. People who don’t actually know Twisted Sister might be surprised how heavy Stay Hungry could get once you ventured outside the safe singles. “Burn in Hell” is an exersize in intensity that deserves every listen you can give it. Perhaps the oft-forgotten “The Beast” is the most welcome here, as a true red-blooded slow burner metal monster.
Despite the quality of the lesser-heard Stay Hungry songs, one remains the pinnacle of Twisted Sister’s finest moments: “The Price”. Twisted probably took guff from the press and the doubters for attempting a ballad, but “The Price” puts the “power” in power ballad. Notably, A.J.’s drums are far busier and heavier that you expect from the average paltry power ballad. Dee Snider demonstrates his expert-level versatility here on the high notes, rendering this song very hard to sing note for note today.
This album wastes no opportunity. Come Out and Play is finally given a fair shake. The dark ugly duckling of the Twisted discography is represented by the title track, “Leader of the Pack”, “The Fire Still Burns” and the forgotten sing-along “You Want What We Got”. They didn’t skimp out here, and you get the full length version of “Come Out and Play”, including the Warriors homage of “Twisted Sister, come out and play!” Pero’s final album, and his drumming on this track is as blazing fast as it got for Twisted Sister. “Leader of the Pack” is campy fun, but it really had to be included, being an integral part of Twisted’s early history and eventual failure (at least according to Jay Jay in the liner notes). “The Fire Still Burns” has an intense flame indeed, though did Dieter Dierks’ production do it any favours? Of note: “You Want What We Got” is not the album version. It is longer at 4:21, and contains an outro with Dee Snider talking, and dropping a deleted expletive! This version is not credited as being unique, and it’s currently unknown where it originated.
Love Is For Suckers is often neglected. The Beau Hill-produced album was written to be Dee’s solo debut, and included members of other bands from the Hill camp, such as Fiona, Winger and Kix. Reb Beach played lead guitar, which led to a sudden change in sound, away from the heavy metal of Twisted Sister’s roots, and more towards what was popular at the time: the subgenre they call “hair metal” today. Joey “Seven” Franco replaced A.J., and was so nicknamed as he was the band’s seventh drummer. Franco also followed Dee into his solo band the following year. “Hot Love” was the single, which should have been a hit, while “Love Is For Suckers” was the only cover the band ever recorded without playing live first.
The final song is the bonus track, “Born to be Wild”, the Steppenwolf cover that they have indeed played live (going back to 1976, but more recently on Live At Wacken: The Reunion). This new studio version was recorded in 2005 and produced by Mark “The Animal” Mendoza. It was used prior to this release in a reality TV series called Knievel’s Wild Ride. It’s tremendous fun, with Twisted Sister ripping into it with their usual reckless abandon. Mendoza’s bass is delightfully bass, but Dee Snider really lets loose at the end.
This set, being limited to the Atlantic years, gratefully doesn’t include anything from Still Hungry or Twisted Christmas. That’s fine and dandy; they would unbalance this release. The Best of the Atlantic Years is the best single Twisted Sister compilation on the market.
ROLE MODELS (2009, 99 minutes, Paul Rudd, Seann William Scott)
Directed by David Wain
All those “bro” movies are from the same mold, aren’t they? They still make them too, variations on a theme. The same general plotline always applies: there’s a pair of funny but crude friends, who have a love/hate thing going on. There’s a girlfriend (or fiance), usually a professional of some kind, to win or win back. There are usually dick and fart jokes.
Role Models is all this, so I won’t go and tell you that it’s different from Knocked Up, Superbad, or Mr. Woodcock in any significant way.
Except one way.
.
Role Models is a love letter to the Hottest Band in the Land. One of the writers clearly loves them, and knew how to make that funny.
In one of the earliest scenes, Scott throws Love Gun into the car tape deck. “Kiss? Nobody likes Kiss. Paul Stanley is sick of Kiss,” says Rudd. Yet, the song “Love Gun” is a recurring motif in Role Models.
Here’s the plot in a nutshell: Two guys work for an energy drink company called Minotaur (think Red Bull, but in gross green). Their job entails doing presentations to kids in highschool to stay off drugs, and drink Minotaur instead. (“We’re selling nuclear horse piss to kids” – Rudd.) One day it all goes wrong for Rudd and his girlfriend Beth (get it? See where this is going?), played by Elizabeth Banks. Rudd goes a little nuts at a presentation, and his giant minotaur truck ends up mounting a horse statue in the school yard.
Luckily, Beth is a lawyer and cuts Rudd and Scott a deal with the judge (without the two even having to appear before him, how convenient for a 99 minute movie). They have to volunteer with “Sturdy Wings”; sort of like a big brothers program. They each have to mentor a child for a set number of hours. The program, run by a hilarious Jane Lynch, is only mildly creepy.
As the two protagonists get to know their assigned “littles”, Scott teaches his new friend about Kiss. “These guys look like clowns,” says lil’ Ronnie. Scott explains that they’re not, they’re actually really rich Jewish guys, and all their songs are about fucking! This interests his young friend, who then starts dancing to “Love Gun”.
“You pull the trigger of my…Love Guuuuuuuuuun!” goes the familiar song.
“See Ronnie? His dick is the gun!” explains Scott helpfully.
Meanwhile, Paul Rudd’s little buddy Augie is played by Christopher Mintz-Plasse (known to you as McLovin). Augie loves fantasy role playing (LARPing), and takes Rudd to a battle. Rudd is not impressed (“I just spent the afternoon with Gleep-Glopp and the Floop-dee-doos”), but decides to help Augie when he needs battle companions. There’s a memorable camping trip that ends with a naked Seann William Scott, but it’s balanced out by Wings jokes (including a fake Wings song called “Love Take Me Down to the Streets”).
Without spoiling the epic ending (complete with a sword battle, a siege, and Ken Jeong), except to say that before credits role, you will hear at least two more Kiss songs, and see the four main characters dressed in Kiss makeup and battle armor. No explanation is given for how the quartet threw the armor together in a mere afternoon, but details do not matter in a film like this. Prepare for a climax that finishes the movie on a hilarious note.
Other great talents in this movie included Joe Lo Truglio and Ken Marino, so check it out if that sounds like your kinda thing. And especially if you’re a Kiss fan.
By now, everyone has heard the anthem “Blame Brett”, a song named for Jordan Miller’s ex, Brett Emmons of the Glorious Sons. While we don’t have Brett’s side of the story, from Jordan’s POV, the relationship is to blame for the following “wild” phase. “So sorry in advance, before you take off you pants, I wouldn’t let me near your friends, I wouldn’t let me near your dad.” This exceptional single has been an earworm all year, and the band are now reaping the rewards with international touring and an appearance on Kimmel. “Don’t blame me, blame Brett!” has become a rally cry.
“What Doesn’t Kill You Makes You Paranoid” boasts a strong chorus, wicked fuzzy guitars and delectable melodies served on a plate of a great beat and fun lyrics. “I think I’m becoming a conspiracy theorist…everyone says that love exists, but I think that it’s a myth.” A great song that screams hit potential.
“Me & Me” plays with tempo, and goes for the accelerator with an 80s sound, and great shouted backing vocals. One of the strengths of this band is the vocalizing by the band, making it a party atmosphere. The party continues with “Everything is Boring” and its “ah, ah” vocals. “Doctor please, just pill me,” sings Jordan Miller to the ADD generation. The pace slows down on “My Body Ft. Your Lips”, a playful title. This is a duet with an American band called Beach Weather, and the female/male vocal lines work really well. Though it takes a minute to catch, this is a great soft, slow burner.
“Kismet” has a speak-sing style on the verses, before the chorus bursts out in exuberant upbeat excitement. The choruses are great, with a disco flavour and a quick beat, but the verses take some getting used to. Moving on, “Shower Beer” is a great title. You may have heard of the concept of drinking a beer in the shower. “I’ve got fear of missing out, I wanna get drunk and sit up, I need to be talked about,” sings Jordan Miller.
“Edge of the Earth” has proven to be a success for the band, and you can hear why. This ballad with a beat has passionate vocals, amazing melodies and harmonies, and the right vibe for a summer cruising hit. That’s followed by a mid-tempo number with acoustic undertones called “If A Tree Falls”, which has nothing to do with the Bruce Cockburn song of the same name. This is a really pretty pop rocker with a nice little guitar solo that is played for vibe. The album goes back to high-speed pop rock on the closer “Cigarette”. “I wanna be your cigarette,” squeals Jordan Miller, on one of the album’s most fun tunes.
Here’s the big problem with this CD. Two, in fact:
Difficulty to purchase. The only way I could get this CD was at a show (sold out) or on their website ($15 shipping).
No booklet, no credits, no nothing. Only the song titles are listed on the back, not even the band members!
This album should be in every store. It’s a hit waiting to happen.
It seems like a lifetime ago, that I co-wrote and recorded the only song I’m on that has ever been officially released. On August 6 2010, I sat down at my computer and wrote the lyrics to what would become one of the strangest songs on Kathryn Ladano’s CD, Open. And yes, you can buy it on iTunes or on compact disc. Just search for Ladano!
Kathryn performs mostly improvised instrumental music, and “Evil Kirk” was to be the only spoken word piece on the album. I had been bugging her for a while to appear on one of her albums, but considering that I’m not a very good singer, and she doesn’t use vocals, it seemed all but impossible. I had thrown around an idea of doing an “Optimus Prime Trilogy” – the life, death, life, death, life, and final death of the Marvel Comics version of the character. This didn’t click with her, but eventually she thought of doing something about Captain Kirk. “Evil Kirk” refers to the original Star Trek episide “The Enemy Within”, in which a transporter accident splits Kirk into good and evil halves. Kathryn loved the episode (probably because there was an alien puppy dog with a horn and antennae), and she really loved William Shatner’s hilariously overwrought performance.
We had an idea of doing the lyrics as a rough series of favourite Kirk quotes. We’d avoid the obvious stuff like “Khaaaaaaan!” and focus on some of our personal favourites. On a personal level, I wanted to honour all eras of Kirk to date, which meant the Chris Pine movies too. Today, Paul Wesley plays an excellent modern take on the character in Strange New Worlds, but when we recorded “Evil Kirk”, Chris Pine was the guy.
We did four takes. I present to you the lyrics to “Evil Kirk” as they appear in my notes, with notations on the origins of each Kirk quote. This is not exactly word for word how it went on the album, but how I wrote it initially. Minor changes are a part of improvisation!
It was the best of times, it was the worst of times. Message, Spock?
The Wrath of Khan takes place on Kirk’s birthday. Spock gifts his friend an ancient printed book of A Tale of Two Cities. “It was the best of times, it was the worst of times,” is Kirk reading the opening sentence of the novel. He then asks Spock if there was a hidden meaning to this gift. None except “happy birthday, surely the best of times.” But Kirk is not happy getting old and fat behind a desk. This theme of aging runs through the film.
Of all the souls I have known His was the most Human.
I truly believe that Spock’s funeral scene in The Wrath of Khan is some of Shatner’s very best emoting in his long career. This line comes from his eulogy for his best friend. When he stumbles and pauses before the word “human”, you can feel the grief as if it were real. The way his face wrenches up before he says the word…I admit it brings tears to my eyes!
No more blah, blah!
From season one, episode eight: “Miri”. A planet of children frustrates Kirk with their chanting of “blah, blah, blah!” In a rage, Kirk responds “NO MORE BLAH BLAH BLAH!” I shortened it to “blah blah” because that’s the way it sounded to me. This is sort of a recurring chorus.
Did I ever tell you, you play an irritating game of chess, Mr. Spock?
From the second pilot episode, “Where No Man Has Gone Before”. In order to introduce the characters to the TV audience, Spock’s logical side is showcased here. “Irritation? Ah yes, one of your Earth emotions,” says Spock before Kirk checkmates him. “Sure you don’t know what irritation is, Mr. Spock?” smiles Kirk.
So why don’t you get some more guys and it’ll be an even fight.
The first Chris Pine line in the song. This is from the 2009 Star Trek movie, when a civilian Kirk gets into a bar fight with some Starfleet personnel.
You can whistle really loud, you know that?
Same scene, same movie. This is when Captain Pike breaks up the brawl and sits Kirk down for a little chat about his future.
No more blah,blah!
Of all things, a god needs compassion.
From the second pilot episode again. Kirk’s closest friend since the Academy, Gary Mitchell, has acquired god-like powers. As he goes slowly mad with power, Kirk reminds him of the fundamentals of godhoood.
What does God need with a starship?
From the much-maligned fifth Trek movie, directed by Shatner himself. The USS Enterprise goes to find “God” at the center of our galaxy. The “god” requests the Enterprise to be his chariot. The charade doesn’t last, as Kirk questions him why a god would need a starship.
Our missions are peaceful…not for conquest.
Season one, episode 18: One of our favourite episodes, “Arena”. Known to casual fans as “the one with the Gorn”, Kirk is sent down by the Metrons to do hand to hand combat with an alien lizard. You can bet, his shirt gets torn.
Worlds are conquered, galaxies destroyed…but a woman is always a woman.
A great line right out of the 1960s, from season one, episode 13: “The Conscience of the King”. Known as “the one with Kodos the Executioner”. This line is regarding Kodos’ beautiful daughter. Not a personal favourite episode, just a great line.
No more blah, blah!
Take me back! Please! I want to live!
I’m Captain Kirk… I’M CAPTAIN KIRK!
Also from “The Enemy Within”. The only way to fix the split good/evil Kirk problem is to re-combine them. Yet, the evil one doesn’t want that. He wants to live! This is a moral quandary that Star Trek would revisit again in episodes like “Tuvix”. A harrowing performance, if campy.
Yeoman, I owe you an explanation…The transporter malfunctioned, divided me, created a duplicate…The animal part of me came to your cabin…He even scratched me to make us look more alike…I’d like the chance to explain it to you…You don’t mind if I come to your cabin later?
A great line from “The Enemy Within”, as Evil Kirk tries to seduce Janice Rand, played by Grace Lee Whitney in season one of the show. The Evil Kirk is lying of course. He is up to no good!
No more blah,blah!
Second star to the right…and straight on ’til morning.
From Peter Pan, but also from Star Trek VI: The Undiscovered Country (“the one with Kim Cattrall”). On the Enterprise-A’s final voyage, they are ordered to return home for decommissioning. Kirk and crew decide to tell Starfleet to “go to hell”. When asked for course and heading, Kirk responds with the Peter Pan line. This is also something of a throwback to the ending of the very first Star Trek motion picture. When asked for a course, Kirk responds, “Over there…thataway.”
Everybody remember where we parked.
A funny line from Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home. The crew park a cloaked Klingon Bird of Prey in the middle of a park in Los Angeles, circa 1986. The film might be better known as “the one with the whales”.
How we deal with death is at least as important as how we deal with life.
Kirk’s line of wisdom to Saavik, played by Kirstie Alley, in Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan. When she fails the Kobayashi Maru test, a no-win scenario, Saavik questions the purpose of a test where everyone dies, in every possible situation.
If Spock were here, he’d say that I was an irrational, illogical human being for going on a mission like this… Sounds like fun!
I felt I had to be inclusive, and I couldn’t ignore Kirk’s only appearance in a Next Generation-era project. Star Trek: Generations (“the one where Kirk dies”) is derided by many fans for a swirly-wirly timey-wimey plot and some continuity issues, which we will get to. This line here is a fan-service reference to Spock, when Picard offers Kirk one more chance to “make a difference”.
No more blah,blah!
I’ve always known…I’ll die alone.
Speaking of continuity, this line from Star Trek V: The Final Frontier (“the one where they meet God”) is a problem. When Kirk eventually dies, Picard is by his side. Fans have ret-conned this to mean that Kirk knew he would die without any of his friends.
What is a Man, but that… lofty spirit… that sense of, Enterprise! That devotion to something that cannot be Sensed… cannot be… Realized, but only… DREAMED! The HIGHEST Reality!
Season two, episode eight: “I, Mudd!” The second of several appearances for Harcourt Fenton Mudd, delightful rogue and scammer. Played by Roger C. Carmel in the original and animated series, Mudd was later portrayed by Rainn Wilson in Star Trek: Discovery and Short Treks. In “I, Mudd”, a planet of human-like androids is the scene for a comedic Trek. Kirk’s line here is about what it means to be human, a common theme in all of Star Trek.
It was…fun.
Kirk’s final line of dialogue to Picard, before he dies in Generations. Fans actually cheered his death in theaters. That’s when Paramount knew their movie was in serious trouble.
KHAN!
OK, so I did use the line initially, but during the performance, we knew it wasn’t right. Ending it with “It was…fun” made more sense.
And that’s “Evil Kirk” for you, line by line. I wish I could do just one more take of it, as I think I have better control of my voice now, but I think the final version is pretty good.
One Drop, from Victoria BC, (not to be confused with the San Diego band) is a seven piece reggae rock band boasting saxophones and keyboards. They’ve been around 20 years, and have at least three releases out. Having said that, this will be my first listen (and first impression) of this band and their music. With sax and keys, it should be a rich sound. Let’s get on with it!
“Rudy” opens this 13 track album with loops and a beat. Even Marillion were experimenting with loopy beats in 2004, and I definitely recognize some of those drum loops (distant and steady) as being fashionable at the time. Then, the track kicks into gear with the saxophones and a bouncy low bassline. The vocals are partly rapped, but it works within the song. There are even guitar solos. Excellent track!
“Three Four Reggae” is a brief song featuring acoustic guitar and rolling bass. It’s a gentle track that lulls you in, leading right into the hard hitting “Big Bang”. This blast of a song hooks you in with a saxophone line at the forefront. It alternates between cool reggae beats and the crash of heavy guitar chords. There’s even a wicked guitar solo. Shades of the Mighty Mighty Bosstones can be heard on this song.
Another brief interlude comes in “Tango” featuring an old sample mixed with a modern beat. Again, this seamlessly leads into a heavy-hitter. “Look the Other Way” is fast and hard punk rock, complete with snotty nose. Just as suddenly, we’re in the slow groove of “Never Rest”. The saxophones are back center stage, and the bass continues to roll while Blair Douglas raps an anti-war message. George W. Bush is lambasted, as the Iraq war raged on. This track would probably have been awesome to hear live back in the day. There’s a brilliant, soft alto sax solo at the end that just reeks of atmosphere. Brilliant tune.
The pace picks up on “Someday”, which jangles its way into your skull right down to your feet. On “Never There”, the groove slows and becomes bitter. This song doesn’t jump out immediately. It may require further listening. “Bloodshed” again tackles serious subject matter, with a gentle guitar rhythm backed by solid bass. Better though is “Gotta Relate” which has a more rock and roll feel, with a classic guitar riff backed by reggae bass. This transitions to a more traditional reggae guitar part, and I get a bit of a Sublime vibe. This is a great song, period. The chorus is catchy as hell. Then, an epic “Rich Man Poor Man” plays with different sections, different tempos, and almost comes off as…progressive rock reggae? Is that a thing? If it is, that’s “Rich Man Poor Man”.
The album closes on two long bombers. “Rudy Dub” is what it sounds like: a slow dub groove. The organ is the main feature here. This is a cool instrumental that works as the penultimate track on an album. The final track, “The Projects”, takes a while to get going and might have benefited from some editing. It has all the energy, drive and punch it needs, but lacks hooks. A killer hook or two, and this album would have ended on an unstoppable note. One Drop get too clever for their own good, going from section to section like a progressive rock band, but in search of that killer hook needed to slam it out of the park. Just once you think they have one going, the song changes into something else.
Good album from a talented band. I bet they are awesome live.
This’ll get the trolls out! Nothing gets the Motley fans in a tizzy more than critiquing a favourite album, or praising a later one with the wrong lead singer. Our rock heroes are not infallible, and Theater of Pain might be the best example of this. After two screamin’ and bangin’ hard rock/heavy metal albums, Motley made a slight change of image & sound, and left us in a Theater of Pain….
Peter Kerr of Rock Daydream Nation assembled a killer crew for this topic. With Joe B., John Clauser, Steve Deluxe, Melissa Nee and myself, we talk memories, impressions then and now, and most importantly, the songs. We discuss every elephant in the room, from the tragic car crash that ended a life, addictions, and direction (or lack thereof). This tumultuous period of Motley history is full of drama, superstardom, great music videos, and tragedy.
I’m excited to watch this show that I was proud to be a small part of. Theater of Pain is one of my favourite musical topics, and I think we fairly covered all the bases here, and them some. How do you feel about Theater of Pain?
BRIAN MAY – “Too Much Love Will Kill You” (1992 EMI/Parlophone CD single)
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