On our old store applications/music test, one of the questions we asked was, “Who would play you in the movie of your life?” (It may have said “musical of your life”, I don’t quite remember exactly.) We had some good answers to the question. I always said that if I had taken the test, I would have answered “Meat Loaf”.
The musical or movie of my life would have be centred on Record Store Tales, obviously. That would require a lot of creative casting in order to fully capture the eccentric personalities. We couldn’t just try to re-capture the vibe of High Fidelity or Empire Records. We would strive for finding the perfect actors for the roles.
In addition to writing and producing the feature, I would also insist upon the last word when it comes to casting. I’ll be a control freak a-la E.L. James on set. I would seek out Martin Scorsese to direct.
The movie would not be without its challenges. How, for example, do we film the famous Open Door Shit scene? I would insist on it being in the movie. Otherwise, what’s the point of it? I would throw a Christian Bale-sized temper tantrum if it were to be cut. We’d also have to get permission to use a lot of great songs, which can be tricky to secure.
But what about the cast? This is how I picture it.
STAR WARS: A New Hope – Special Edition original motion picture soundtrack (1997 RCA limited edition with holographic discs, original soundtrack released 1977)
Composed and conducted by John Williams
Everyone over a certain age remembers the feeling of seeing Star Wars for the first time. Star Wars — not “A New Hope“, a subtitle used starting with the 1981 theatrical re-release. It was hard not to be blown away by it. Star Wars was groundbreaking in many ways, but let’s not forget about the music! Before Star Wars, space movies didn’t have much in the way of original soundtracks. The best space movie of all time, 2001: A Space Odyssey, used entirely pre-existing music by composers as diverse as Strauss and Ligeti. Lucas himself wanted to do the same thing. He had selected pieces such as The Planets by Holst, before having a change of heart. [Thanks to Rob Daniels from the Visions in Sound show for this info.]
Movie veteran John Williams came recommended by Steven Speilberg, who struck gold with the composer on Jaws. Incredibly, Williams turned in a score for Star Wars even more memorable than that of Jaws. Utilizing the London Symphony, a soundtrack of incredible emotional depth and themes was forged.
This 1997 issue of the soundtrack was released to coincide with the Special Editions, but don’t let that frighten you away. When the original was released on vinyl, the complete score could not fit onto two LPs. The special editions enabled the engineers to go back and do new digital transfers from the original master tapes. A full chronological soundtrack was then assembled including previously unreleased music, as well as bonus alternate takes.
The discs are housed in a nice CD wallet that is prone to scratching the discs if you are not careful. The discs themselves are etched with a hologram of the dreaded Death Star. The other two soundtracks in this series of reissues had their own holograms, but only for the initial run of discs. When they sold out, they were replaced by un-etched discs in simple jewel cases. The first run are collectibles, at least when the CD wallet is in good shape and still has the embossed outer cardboard shell. Unfortunately over my years at the Record Store, I saw many of these in absolutely mangled condition.
The wonderful thing about listening to a soundtrack like this, in order, is enjoying the images that come with it. You could be cleaning the house or working on your taxes, but subliminally, your mind is re-playing the scene when Obi-Wan gives Luke his father’s lightsaber. You know the score by heart: when old Ben says, “A young Jedi named Darth Vader, who was a pubil of mine before he turned to evil, you hear that mournful theme swoon. When we were kids my sister and I used to play Star Wars to the music of The Empire Strikes Back soundtrack, and it made the scene we re-created with our Kenner toys that much more awesome.
Put on the track “The Battle of Yavin” and try not making laser blast sounds, and a big ol’ explosion when the Death Star blows up. It’s more fun just to go ahead and make the sounds anyway.
Disc one contains the bonus track, an alternate take “Binary Sunset”. You know the scene, when Luke is looking longingly as the twin suns set. Hidden within the track, but unlisted, are alternate takes of the opening scene music, complete with voice cues.
I’m a firm believer that the Star Wars soundtracks are basically the heavy metal of the classical world. Listen to those trumpets and horns blasting those battle themes. Put that on an Iron Maiden album played by the duo of Smith and Murray, and you have primo heavy metal. That’s one reason why I recommend John Williams and the Star Wars soundtracks to fans of heavy metal who want to expand their horizons.
RECORD STORE TALES MkII: Getting More Tale #407: Summertime
I’ve always been a summer guy. I was born in July. I don’t like the snow. My spirits are stronger and moods happier in the summer. Summer holidays were glorious days to be spent at the cottage. The beach, swimming, new music, no school…plus my birthday. My whole year revolved around July and August!
Working at the Record Store in the summer was fun. The sun pouring through the windows, opening the door and letting the breeze in…it was wonderful. Not to mention that, as a single male, I didn’t mind female customers coming in dressed for summer.
Of course summer wasn’t all peaches and cream. It meant the return of the infamous “No Shirts, No Shoes, No Service” sign and its enforcement thereof. I hated having to kick people out for coming in with no shirt, but it had to be done.
Me: “Hey, do you mind putting on a shirt in the store?”
Him: “Why, are you serving food here?”
No, it’s just that I don’t want to have to watch the bead of sweat dripping off your nipple ring.
T-Rev made a different sign. His said:
Because highschool is free, And Jerry Springer does not work here, Shoes and Shirts must be worn in store.
But I don’t know if he ever hung it up. I hope he did.
People with no shoes were just as bad, particularly the Barefoot DJ who tried to fight us for his human rights to walk around with no shoes on. All I know is that I had standing orders to kick him out, human rights be damned. You can do whatever you want out there, but inside the store where insurance companies tell us what to do, you gotta obey the rules! (If a CD case fell off the shelf and broke, and he stepped on a piece and cut his foot, he could sue. And CD cases fell of the shelf and shattered every day.)
Because we had these big glass windows, sometimes the heat in the summer would get to be too much. It was like a greenhouse. There was always a constant battle over the air conditioning level, and it seemed we could never arrive at a compromise that made everyone comfortable. My final summer at the store (2005), it was so hot inside that I tended to leave the big overhead counter lights off. It made it harder for me to inspect incoming CDs for quality, but it also kept me from sweating all over them.
Summer album releases were memorable. Metallica’s Load (June 4 1996) was the soundtrack to that summer for me. In store, in car, it didn’t matter. Load saw a lot of store play. I’m quite fond of Load, and I’m sure the fact that it was Metallica that could be played in-store had a lot to do with that. The same summer, Kiss were out there on their reunion tour, and I had their You Wanted the Best live compilation (June 25 1996) to keep me company at work.
I expect summer 2015 to rock just as much. I don’t know what my album for the summer will be this year, but Van Halen’s Tokyo Dome Live in Concert is a contender. I’ve already shorn my mane to cope with the summer heat.
Still, when it comes to summertime, I truthfully think Sammy Hagar said it best:
“We made it through the cold And that freezin’ snow is gettin’ old, hey!
Woo! Summer nights and my radio (Ah-ah) Well that’s all we need, baby. Don’tcha know? We celebrate when the gang’s all here (Ah-ah) Ah, hot summer nights, that’s my time of the year-ow!”
THE CULT – Rare Cult(2000 Beggars Banquet box set with limited 7th remix CD)
Rare Cult is a feast of rare and unreleased Cult music, for the Cult connosoir only. If you’ve been a Cult fan for a while but have struggled to find those early singles, then this is your dream box set, my friend. They have a lot of singles and assorted rarities, and acquiring a complete set of them all takes money. Rare Cult secures a huge chunk of that music in one package.
I’m not going to bother cataloging all the different tunes and where they came from. They’re too numerous but I will say the following:
1. This set has an enormous number of unreleased demos and otherwise finished songs that nobody had heard before — not previously released on B-sides. The songs range from the Dreamtime era (1984) with some cool, unheard BBC performances. Over six discs, it spans over a decade to 1995 when the band broke up (for the first time). All tracks are of very good sound quality.
2. There is a humongous (80 page) booklet inside, with complete credits and details for every single song contained within. Billy Duffy and Ian Astbury provide commentary, and there are lots of photos too.
3. There are a lot of remixes here, as per normal for a band from this era. In fact there is an entire seventh limited edition bonus disc dedicated single remixes, called Rare Cult Mixes. I don’t know how many copies were released with the bonus disc, but be sure of what you buy before you buy it! Personally I don’t see the point of buying this set without the seventh disc. For example, the “Fire Woman” single had two excellent remixes: The “LA mix”, and the “NYC mix”. The NYC mix is included on the Disc 5 of this box set, but to get the LA mix, if you don’t have the “Fire Woman” single, can only be had on the limited edition seventh Rare Cult disc. If you’re a collector (which I think you are, because if you’re not you probably stopped reading this already) then there’s no reason to buy the version without the bonus CD. Wait it out and get the full package.
4.Peace. While astute fans had probably collected most of these tracks already, this box set contains the first ever official release of the Peace album, in sequence on disc 3. The Cult were working on Peace after the Love album, and even finished it, but scrapped the recordings for being too Love-like. They hooked up with Rick Rubin to revamp, re-write, and re-record the album, released as Electric. Many of the Peace songs surfaced as B-sides over the years, on singles and EPs such as The Manor Sessions. While Rare Cult was the first release of the full Peace album, it has since been reissued as part of the Electric Peace two disc set.
5.Warning! There’s more. If you really, really, really want it all, you have to shell out for the single CD Best Of Rare Cult which had five exclusive songs not included here. Oh, marketing. The five exclusives on Best of Rare Cult are: “She Sells Sanctuary (long version)”, “Spanish Gold”, “The River”, “Lay Down Your Gun (version two)”, and “Go West (Crazy Spinning Circles) (original mix)”. Some of these songs, such as “The River”, are B-sides, while some are unreleased.
6. There’s even more! Yes, there are demos here, but that’s not all of them. The masterminds behind this set cleverly left off enough demos to create a whole other box set. You’ll want to pony up for Rare Cult: The Demo Sessions (an even more limited edition 5 CD set of its own) which is interesting in its own right. Look at Rare Cult as scratching the surface.
7. Even with all this stuff available out there, The Cult liked to include live songs on their singles. None are present here. Be forewarned, you may still want to get those original singles anyway, if you care enough! Maybe they should do a box set called Rare Live Cult. (Are you listening Ian?)
As a listening experience, Rare Cult is long but rewarding. One thing about The Cult, they were a diverse band, and this set is very diverse. For example you’ll go from a very dancy 80’s remix of “Sanctuary” straight into “No. 13” which is more punk influenced. Regardless of what it is, or what it isn’t, I think this set is worth listening to. Even their demos are better than most bands’ album tracks. Like many bands who released numerous single B-sides, The Cult put effort into all their songs. Check out “Sea and Sky”, “Bleeding Heart Graffiti” and “Bone Bag” as ample proof.
The packaging is quite nice. It comes in a sturdy black box. The aforementioned booklet allows you to read through the whole history of the band up to 1995. The first six discs are housed in three double digipacks, while the seventh disc sits in its own sleeve tucked into the box.
You might not very often have the luxury of 8-9 hours to listen to the Cult, but if you’re a fan, think hard and consider your buying options.
Summer is here. To quote Glenn Frey, the heat is on. For me, the best part of summer is Sausagefest. I submitted my song list months ago. I have recorded my bits. I have also shorn my mane. Unlike Samson, without my hair I am stronger! In this summer heat, camped out in the Valley, hair is not an asset, even for a metal head.
Uncle Meat, Sausagefest’s esteemed music curator and co-founder, tells me that this year is a complete reboot. For the first time in years, they have ditched the exclusions list, so all songs were on the table for votes. In prior years, we would have a list of songs that had been used before that could not be voted for again. This year, even perennials like “Tom Sawyer” were up for votes. It’s going to be an interesting weekend.
As for actual prep, I’ve bought a new tent. I have my Coleman Biowipes. My cooler is at the ready and I bought a fucking machete.
From the Gene Simmons Song Factory, heeeeere’s Keel!
Like many Gene Simmons productions, Keel’s The Right to Rock bears his name on a few writing credits. The rest of the songs are basically reworkings of tracks from Keel’s first album Lay Down the Law. That album, like Ron Keel’s debut with Steeler (featuring one Yngwie J. Malmsteen) were on Shrapnel. For the A&M Records debut, they pulled out the big guns. They got Gene Simmons in all his wig-ness, and put out a very corny but tremendously fun music video.
It is “America 1989”, and rock and roll is outlawed. “Those who are apprehended suffer severe consequences.” Can our young teenage Keel lookalike get away from the rock police? Quiet Riot did something similar with their “The Wild and the Young” video a year later. It’s corny fun.
The song too is corny fun. I guess it’s a classic now. It has that stock heavy metal riff that you need: something Motley Crue or the Scorpions would be comfortable with. It has that rebellious rock theme that was so prominent in the 80’s. It has a shoutalong chorus. “You got it! The Right to Rock!” Hey, I grew up in a Catholic school. I know what this is about. “Don’t let anyone tell you how to live your life!” I had a teacher call me out on the first day of school for wearing a Judas Priest T-shirt. I could relate to this song in a big way when I was 13.
It should be noted that Gene Simmons, as a producer, is not known for his sonics. The Right to Rock sounds pretty good for the period, but the drums ring shallow and weak. There’s not much presence for the bass guitar, and the backing vocals are the typical rock mush. That’s what you get with Gene behind the console.
“Back to the City” has a good Priest-like chug to it. I think Keel were going for something middle of the road with their music, like Priest-meets-Scorps-meets-Crue-meets-Kiss. If so, this hit the mark. Ron’s vocals are overwrought but that’s his style. If you don’t like that kind of vocal, you won’t like Keel.
Kinda stinky is “Let’s Spend the Night Together”. You know, I still gotta give the guys credit. They have made this into a pretty fine pop metal song. If you didn’t know the song, you’d assume it’s an original, in the pop metal genre. So from that perspective, I think it’s kinda cool. Stinky and cool — like good gorgonzola.
“Easier Said Than Done” was written by Simmons/Weissman, the same team responsible for much of the Animalize album. The lyrics even reference “Russian Roulette”, a song title Gene had been toying with for years. (A song called “Russian Roulette” was finally release on Sonic Boom.) So, guess who “Easier Said Than Done” sounds like? That’s right — it is a dead ringer for Simmons-style Kiss. And it’s actually a pretty good song. The problem is Ron’s Gene impression. I can’t help but chuckle at his dead-on Gene vocals. I dare you to refrain from a giggle yourself. Same deal with “So Many Girls, So Little Time”. Kiss fans will recognize that’s a line recycled from the Kiss song “Burn Bitch Burn”.
Onto side two, “Electric Love” is a Keel original, but you immediately notice that the song isn’t as immediate as the two previous Simmons tunes. “Speed Demon”, another original, sounds exactly as the title implies. Quality-wise, it’s only at “Priest outtake” level (Defenders of the Faith era). Then it’s back to Simmons outtakes, with “Get Down”, the weakest of the Simmons songs by a long shot. “You’re the Victim (I’m the Crime)” is a Gene-like title, but this too is a Keel tune. It’s in the same vein as “Speed Demon”, and the same level of quality.
It’s fun to revisit The Right To Rock periodically…but sparingly.
RECORD STORE TALES MkII: Getting More Tale #406: All of the Aerosmith…
The following challenge was posted to me by reader chrisjcombs:
“I humbly request an entry that ranks —- in order of your preference —- Aerosmith’s entire discography. I would love to see where you’d place albums like Rock in Hard Place and Night in the Ruts when lined up against the likes of Just Push Play, Nine Lives, Get A Grip, etc.”
Having recently re-listened to virtually all of the Aerosmith, in order for my Box of Fire series of reviews, I had to oblige.
In order to give some ground rules to Chris’ request, I will have to stick to studio albums. I don’t own A Little South of Sanity, so for the purposes of this list, I will exclude live releases. I also don’t have all the different greatest hits, so I’ll leave those out too. What’s left is 15 studio albums. Since I’ve reviewed most of these albums already, I won’t be adding too much in terms of commentary. Let’s give’r!
After some deliberation here’s all of the Aerosmith, from worst to best:
I think Nine Lives is a real underdog of an album — a latter-day gooder, that often gets lumped in with shit like Just Push Play. Pump, in my opinion, is Aerosmith as close to a peak as possible, and very close indeed to the top of the pyramid. Sonically and song-wise, I think Pump is as F.I.N.E. fine as anything the did in the 1970’s!
I hope you enjoyed this list, and thanks to Chris for the suggestion!
This review comes by request of, well, several readers. Done With Mirrors was Aerosmith’s first record on their new deal with Geffen. That means it wasn’t included in the massive 13 disc Box of Fire that I reviewed recently. I intended to get around to Done With Mirrors anyway, but the reader anticipation adds an interesting sort of pressure.
I know some people hold this album in high esteem. “36 minutes of classic Aerorock,” said one reader. I know that Done With Mirrors is a bit of a cult favourite album in some ways. The band ignore all but one song in their live sets, but some fans have loved it since it came out. I think it’s possible that some readers, knowing my love for underdog albums, are hoping I’m going to come out with some really appreciative glowing observations about the album.
The fact of the matter is, I’ve never been a fan of this album. “Let the Music Do the Talking” is probably my second favourite Aero-tune ever, right after “Chip Away the Stone”. As an album, I have always found Done With Mirrors to be so-so at best, and I’ve never really warmed up to it over the years. Why is that?
I decided to do something different for this review, and listen to the album as background music while working on something else. I came away with some strong impressions, so I immediately gave it another listen. Rather than go song-by-song, I’d rather just talk about the feeling I get from the album now.
I used to think the production (by Ted Templeman) sucked. I think it could use some embellishment, but hot damn! Aren’t Joey’s drums sounding fucking awesome? Yes they are. I’d say Joey’s the MVP on Done With Mirrors, as he is so rock solid consistent right through!
I used to think the songs (all but “Let the Music Do the Talking”) were pretty much just crap. I think anyone would have to admit that these are not the catchiest tunes Aerosmith have ever written in their storied career. They do, however, rock. They rock hard. “My Fist Your Face” is exactly what it sounds like — a fist right in your face!
I used to think that Steve and the band sounded tired compared to the earlier material, or what came after. I still think that’s true, but even tired, Aerosmith were capable of blowing out the speakers with bluesy riffs and Steve’s scats. If you pay attention to the lyrics, you’ll hear that Steve’s as sassy as ever. I love the name-dropping of “Joe Perry, oooh Mr. Style.”
Compared to, say, Pump, Done With Mirrors doesn’t fare too well. Letting it stand on its own and just enjoying it as a batch of rockers, it’s actually not as bad as I remembered. Maybe all these years I just haven’t been letting it in.
Big surprise: How swampy and cool “She’s On Fire” is. No idea why it never clicked with me before. I can say the same for a few songs on this album. While very few would make my own personal road tapes, there aren’t any to skip. It’s a fair chunk of solid, hard rocking Aerosmith. No ballads, no fluff, no embarrassing forays into other genres.
Finally, gotta love the cover art and double meaning. I’ve always been fond of the packaging way before hearing the album.
What happened to the good ship King Kobra? Hilarious misspelled name, silly coordinated hair colours (all but veteran drummer Carmine Appice, who complimented their red and blonde with his red and black), and production by the guy who brought you Quiet Riot — what could possibly go wrong? They even had their own “kobra” signature hand gesture, and weird complementary stage moves in an expensive music video.
When you have lyrics like, “I’m ready to strike, I’m cocked and loaded tonight,” but you’re not David Lee Roth or Gene Simmons, you’re already fighting an uphill battle. Carmine saw the sudden success of bands like Quiet Riot, and decided “why the hell not”? He picked up some great players for this project. Bassist Johnny Rod ended up in W.A.S.P. later on. David Michael-Phillips played with Lizzy Borden after Kobra. Mick Sweda formed BulletBoys. Mark Free formed Unruly Child, and ultimately became Marcie Free. She still fronts Unruly Child today. Meanwhile Carmine Appice reformed this lineup of King Kobra, substituting in Paul Shortino for Free, and getting good reviews for it.
So talent aside, there’s no worries there. There are two major issues with this record. One: the muddy Spencer Proffer production which lays a muffly blanket over the band. All but Appice of course, who bears a very Frankie Banali-like sound on this album. The guitars are empty transistor radio renditions of what guitars should sound like. Two: filler material kept Ready To Strike from fulfilling its potential.
It’s not all filler of course — much of it is damn good. The first three tracks in a row (“Ready to Strike”, “Hunger”, and “Shadow Rider”) are all really good, actually. Famously, “Hunger” became a minor hit, although it was actually written by Canada’s Kick Axe, and recorded by them under the name Spectre General, for Transformers: The Movie in 1986! I prefer the King Kobra version, because Mark Free really nailed that vocal.
Other decent tunes include “Shake Up”…I mean, it’s OK. It has a good pre-chorus, “And the beat goes on and on and on…”, but the lines about home work and yard work were pretty goofy even back then. Like that one, “Tough Guys” is also a good tune (mid-tempo mellow rocker) sunk by a bad lyric. “The world’s greatest lie, is that all of us tough guys don’t cry.” No thanks, not cranking that one with the windows down.
Crummy tunes: “Attention”, “Piece of the Rock”, “Breakin’ Out” and “Dancing With Desire”. Stinky. I can’t decide how I feel about the overwrought “Second Thoughts”.
Overall: Middle of the road album that neither astounds nor repulses. It has enough good tunes to warrant a place in my collection. How about you?
T-Rev – Brad Pitt
The Owner – Joe Flaherty (as Guy Caballero)
Iron Tom Sharpe – 
Uncle Meat – Rip Torn
Aaron – Jason Statham
She Who Shall Not Be Named – Since Margaret Hamilton is dead, we will have to audition this role.
Joe Big Nose – His lookalike of course, David Schwimmer. If Schwimmer is unavailable, we go down the list to Freddie Prinze Jr.
Dandy Douche – Andy Dick
Jonathan the Accountant – Romany Malco
Mrs. LeBrain – Kate Upton
Annoying solicitors – Tom Cruise and John Travolta
and featuring Meat Loaf Aday as “LeBrain”
mikeladano.com 