VANDENBERG – Vandenberg (Originally 1982, 2011 Rock Candy remaster)
I must the only person in the world who doesn’t care about the first Vandenberg album.
There’s nothing wrong with it. I can’t say anything too critical about it. A track or two aside, it just fails to click.
Of course the standout is “Burning Heart”, the song that Whitesnake rehearsed but never released on Slip of the Tongue as they should have. This hot ballad would have been a hit for the ‘Snake, had Adrian Vandenberg not got hurt and replaced on album by Steve Vai. It’s a truly remarkable song that, honestly, deserved the Coverdale treatment. (Fortunately, you can get a rough version of the song by Whitesnake.) It was good enough to use as an effective side one closer.
On another highlight, Adrian plays some stunning classical acoustic stuff on “Wait”. It transforms into a slow, cool dark rocker but has the unfortunate chorus of “Wait, wait, wait, ’til the shit hits the fan.”
“Your Love Is In Vain” is fine, B-level hard rock, akin to Helix, or Talas, or any band of that nature. Bert Heerink is a somewhat generic singer who doesn’t help elevate the track higher. Kind of a Derek St. Holmes style singer. “Back On My Feet” sounds like a Quiet Riot B-side, right down to the high notes that the bass occasionally hits. “Ready For You” could have been a Van Halen-like speed rocker but lacks the teeth that superior production can bring. “Too Late” has a cool riff and boogie, also recalling Van Halen. Wicked neoclassical, finger-tappin’ solo work too. “Nothing to Lose” is a decent song, with a good chorus that sounds like Talas. “Lost in a City” and “Out in the Streets” are not memorable at all and the production does them no favours.
Let’s say three keepers:
“Burning Heart”
“Wait”
“Nothing to Lose”
Whitesnake should have re-recorded “Burning Heart” properly on the road, when Adrian returned to the band after his injury. They blew a huge opportunity for a timeless hit by not doing so.
The best thing about this album is the guitar work. The songs are secondary.
HAREM SCAREM – Rubber(1999 Warner Japan) RUBBER – Rubber(2000 Warner Canada)
Time hasn’t been too unkind to Rubber, the experimental Harem Scarem album where they actually changed the band’s name to match. Except in Japan where Harem Scarem were huge, a strange album by a band called Rubber emerged in the summer of 2000. A generic, low budget rubber duckie adorned its cover. No picture of the band on the back, but the mixing credits of Harry Hess and Pete Lesperance revealed the connection. In Japan, the album was released in 1999 as a full-on Harem Scarem album, with all four band members depicted on the back, including Barry Donaghy and Darren Smith. (Notably, Smith is not pictured nor listed as a band member on the domestic CD, as by the time it was released, he had left the band.)
What’s the fuss, then? Harem Scarem had released a series of excellent albums with rarely a dud, but little impact in Canada or the United States. Their albums had been skewing progressively more pop as the 1990s wore on. By Rubber, it could almost have been considered a complete re-invention to a pop rock sound, heavily influenced by the simplicity of 90s pop-punk bands. So the band was relaunched in hopes that some people thought they were a new hot group on the scene with a sizzling debut.
The Japanese and domestic CDs had different running orders, but since it was released in Japan first that’s the track list we’ll be following, including exclusive bonus song “Enemy”. To its merit, the domestic CD includes an exclusive remix of “Sunshine” by noted producer Arnold Lanni.
“It’s Gotta Be” opens the album with a very 90s-sounding simple descending guitar riff. It stands upon a catchy chorus, which Harry Hess delivers with the usual melodic expertise. There are stronger tunes on the album, but “It’s Gotta Be” sounds very much like what was on the radio and video at the time. Bands like Marvelous 3.
The oddly titled “Who-Buddy” is more like it! Fast-paced (again, think pop-punk), with twang and candy-coated melody. The build-up to the chorus can’t be resisted. So very different from Harem Scarem of old, but the same four guys do it well. Hess and Lesperance have always had a foot in pop, as demonstrated on the very mainstream Harem Scarem debut. Pop changed quite a bit from 1990 to 2000, and “Who-Buddy” is a reflection of that evolution.
“Coming Down” is a different kind of pop, more lush with Spanish-influenced guitar twang. Slower paced, but just as focused on melody, “Coming Down” is a lovely song that reminds of the melancholy music of the time. “Didn’t know the grass is always greener, and then those blades cut my own hands.”
Thing really go pop-punk on the outstanding single “Stuck With You”. As Hess sings, “There couldn’t be anymore anarchy if we tried,” you believe he’s 22 years old. Smith’s busy drumming is on the mark, and the chorus just soaks into you until it’s just…stuck with you! On the cover for the CD single, the three remaining guys are depicted with contemporary short spiky hair. If not for the lack of neck tattoos they could have been Blink 192. There’s even a reference to the current events of the time. “The killer bees, casualties, everybody’s paying a price.” Remember the killer bee scare of the late 90s? The bees never came.
Unfortunately the hit never came either. Though a brilliant song, it was impaired by a truly terrible music video about a kid who eats a variety of objects including a rubber duckie (seemingly containing the band), a doll and his little sister. Somebody should have deep-sixed that idea.
“Sunshine” opens with typically late-90s skippy sound effects and adornments. The Japanese version is 4:56 in length; Arnold Lanni trimmed his mix down to 3:54. A slow pop song with distorted watery vocals on the Japanese mix, it’s a unique sounding track that fit into the alterna-flavours of the era. Motley Crue made a whole album mixed like this, except it was shit and called Generation Swine. The Lanni mix on the domestic CD retains the sound effects but ditches the vocal distortion, in favour of a clean mix that is easier on the ears, including additional backing harmonies. Both versions have their merits, with the Japanese as a more spacey, experimental track and the Lanni version more aimed at radio.
Next up is the rockabilly “Face It”, continuing the twang of previous songs. Unfortunate album filler compared to the others. Smith’s drumming up a storm though! “Trip” is more fun with a bendy 90s riff, and lead vocals by Pete Lesperance. The chorus is suitably snotty. Another odd title, “Pool Party” conceals an interesting if not quite memorable enough song. The music is a little off-kilter, hinting at the band’s truly excellent schooled musicianship that was largely simplified for this album.
Back to the upbeat, “Headache” is pure bangin’ fun, with influences from rock to punk to ska. Then an understated ballad called “Everybody Else” sits in the penultimate slot, building tension with a stealthy backdrop of strings. Similar to past dark Harem Scarem ballads though wildly different in production. Then we close on the Japanese exclusive “Enemy”, an upbeat track with a big chorus.
Harem Scarem continued with the dual identity for a few more albums before reverting back to their original sound and name. As Rubber, they next released Ultra Feel, Weight of the World and Live at the Gods. Weight of theWorld was a return to their classic, slightly progressive hard rock sound and so the name change back to Harem Scarem was sure to follow. By 2003 the Rubber experiment was fully exhausted and the album Higher was the first to have no connection to that name. From the Rubber era, only Weight of the World was included in the expansive Harem Scarem box set.
Rubber the album isn’t bad though. It’s better than the followup Ultra Feel, and though dated, still contains a number of good songs that are fully enjoyable today. The best track is clearly “Stuck With You”, despite the atrocious music video.
QUIET RIOT – Hollywood Cowboys (2020 King Record Co. Japanese import)
We all wanted Frankie Banali go out on a high note. He fought hard. His battle with cancer was inspiring. Unfortunately, his last Quiet Riot album Hollywood Cowboys is not memorable except as the drummer’s finale. The shame of it is, they previous album Road Rage was pretty decent so it wasn’t unreasonable to get hopes up for the sequel.
The songs just aren’t memorable enough. It’s bad when you can’t remember which track was the single (“In the Blood”). The opener “Don’t Call It Love” is better; singer James Durbin was able to infuse the chorus with some passion. The problem is none of the songs stick. Can you remember how “Change Or Die” or “Wild Horses” goes without a listen? “In the Blood” isn’t terrible by any stretch but there are no real singles on this album.
The musicianship is fantastic, with Frankie drumming like only he could. There’s some tasty organ on “The Devil You Know”, but no hooks. You can hear that they worked hard on Hollywood Cowboys, adorning songs with “woo oo ooo” backing vocals and lickity-split solos by Alex Grossi.
Some highlights include an AC/DC-like blues called “Roll On”, and the ballad “Holding On” which nails the vintage Quiet Riot vibe. There’s also a blast of Priest-like metal called “Insanity” that has plenty of power if lacking in melodies.
The album sounds as if rushed, which would be understandable given the circumstances, but that’s the impression it gives. Even the cover looks rushed. The mix is really saturated and could have used some more loving care. To its credit, it is probably the heaviest Quiet Riot album ever, from drums to riffs.
Here’s the mindblowing part. Only one guy on this album is still in Quiet Riot, and that’s guitarist Alex Grossi. James Durbin left before it was released, and he was replaced by former QR singer Jizzy Pearl (from the 10 album). Legendary bassist Rudy Sarzo is returning in 2022, replacing Chuck Wright. Lastly and most regrettably, Frankie’s stool was filled by former Type O Negative drummer Johnny Kelly. None of that is relevant a Hollywood Cowboys review, it’s just recent history. One does wish for more stability in the lineup, and perhaps Sarzo will bring that.
The Japanese import bonus track this time out is a lacklustre acoustic version of “Roll On”. Frankie plays with brushes, so it’s interesting from a drummer’s point of view. Sadly it’s the kind of bonus track that’s just not worth the price paid for the import.
Hollywood Cowboys is a scattershot collection of parts that never coalesces into songs. Everybody wanted Frankie Banali to succeed, in every way possible. But one must also be honest in a review, and can take no pleasure in shitting all over Frankie’s last record.
With copies of Slash Puppet’s first demo and first EP going for ridiculous amounts of money on Ebay, lead singer Mif decided to do something about it. It was time for a new release; a compilation this time, with one unreleased track for the collector.
Studs & Gems features 10 tracks from the band’s previous releases plus an unreleased live track called “Stranger Danger” recorded at Rock N’ Roll Heaven in Toronto. And what a track it is! An energetic, stuttery riff of the AC/DC persuasion serves as backing for Mif’s overloaded live vocal workout. This accelerated rocker stands up with Slash Puppet’s recorded works, and makes one wish for more live tapes. The tail of the track includes a nod to AC/DC’s “Danger” in a brilliant end twist.
As for the studio material, the album is top-loaded right off the bat with three of Slash’s Puppet’s most accomplished pieces of songwriting, all from the EP. “When the Whip Comes Down” is first, stomping fast-paced and unstoppable. The irresistible “na na na na” pre-chorus just sets you up to be knocked down again! Outstanding guitar work helps frame some of Mif’s coolest lyrics about overcoming adversity. Then it’s “Rippin’ on a Wishbone” which takes things back to a nice rocking groove accented by slide guitars and hooks galore. The whole while, Mif’s unique rasp keeps the sound from being generic. This string of solid gold is capped by “Eyes of a Child”, a truly special acoustic ballad that, in a just world, would be a million seller. Taking things seriously and singing from the heart, Slash Puppet should have had a massive hit on their hands. If only the 90s weren’t the 90s. “Eyes of a Child” has every ingredient, housed within a majestic, carefully constructed, classic power ballad.
With “Evil Woman”, the compilation dips back into 1989’s The Demo. In terms of remastering, things sounds pretty even between the two eras, so well done there. “Evil Woman” is one of Slash Puppet’s fast head-bangers. However they always had a knack for backing vocals to sweeten up the hooks. This was actually the closing track on the original demo, but it works fine where it is. “Hard On Love”, also from The Demo, goes slower and sleazier. Mif’s growl has plenty of bite, but note the backing vocals always there when you need ’em.
Back to the EP, “Stop Tellin’ Me Lies” is one of the most classic-sounding Slash Puppet tunes, reminding us a bit of songs that London Quireboys used to have hits with. The backing vocals are really laid out with care. This could be the most flat-out instantly catchy of the tracks. Note the tasteful use of classy slide guitar once again. Staying on the EP, “Hitch a Ride (On a Train)” is a special song. Contemplative acoustic guitars and philosophical lyrics set it apart from the other tracks. Everybody loves train metaphors, but once again there’s just something special here. The acoustic guitar arrangement and the heartfelt lyrics set it apart.
The last three studio songs are all classics from The Demo. “Slowdown” is just balls-out. Everything to the max, from the tempo to the rasp. The band made a well-received music video, in a time when bands often couldn’t make music videos to support an independent release. “Squeeze It In” was the other demo tune that made waves, and it takes things back down to the gutter. A slow grind with innuendo spilling over the rim. Memorable as hell; tasteful guitar work keeping things from going completely to excess. Finally “Overload” takes the tempo back to top gear. If you’re going to call your song “Overload”, you better deliver.
Slash Puppet always delivered. 32 years ago, the band played their first gig and now we finally have an official live track for the CD collection. “Stranger Danger” closes the CD on a resounding note: we want more.
Studs & Gems can be obtained directly from Mif Entertainment, but act fast as this is a limited edition, and paying $200 on eBay for a copy of the EP is just unfortunate.
5/5 stars
Slash Puppet:
Mif – Lead Vocals Frank Bartoletti – Guitars and Backing Vocals Lou Garscadden – Guitars and Backing Vocals Franklin Wylse – Drums and Backing Vocals Pete Dove – Bass and Backing Vocals (1989-1992) Dave Carreiro – Bass (1992-1995)
Toronto’s Slash Puppet are back in the speakers, with a new “best of” CD called Studs & Gems, featuring classics and unreleased material! To pre-order your copy, contact MIF Entertainment ASAP, as this is a limited edition. Studs & Gems includes favourites like “When the Whip Comes Down”, “Slow Down” and the amazing ballad “Eyes of a Child”, one of the most intensely emotional ballads you’ll ever hear. Studs & Gems also includes the unreleased “Stranger Danger”, a live track previously unheard elsewhere. Finding original copies of their first two releases can be an expensive prospect, so Studs & Gems makes it easy to get some of these unsung classic songs.
For the occasion I’ve dug up this VHS tape of Teresa Roncon of the Power 30 talking to Mif, Dave and Franklin of Slash Puppet. It was summer of ’93 and the band were going the independent route. Teresa questions them on the pros and cons, and their musical influences. Wisdom is offered and bands are praised. Brief, but terrific interview with the band!
Studs & Gems track listing:
When the Whip Comes Down Rippin’ On a Wishbone Eyes of a Child Evil Woman Hard on Love Stop Tellin’ Me Lies Hitch a Ride (On a Train) Slow Down Squeeze It In Overload Stranger Danger (Live)
Special thanks to Jennifer Ladano for telling me to write this story down!
RECORD STORE TALES #951: Set Your VCR! It’s 1986 and KISS Meets The Phantom Is On Tonight!
When thinking back about my earliest rock and roll discoveries, it’s important to recall the order in which I got the albums, or first heard the tunes. It seems like I had always known “Rock N’ Roll all Nite”, but since my first Kiss albums were Alive! and Hotter Than Hell, those were the songs I knew best. And I barely knew them! I got my first Kiss in September of ’85. But I was learning slowly. Eventually I’d get Asylum, and gradually tape Kiss albums from my neighbour George.
Something else happened that exposed me to Kiss in a new way, that I sometimes forget about. It was the first time I saw Kiss Meets the Phantom of the Park.
Everybody knew about Kiss Meets the Phantom, but few of us were old enough to have seen it. When it showed up in the TV guide one week, on some Buffalo station, it seemed like every kid with access to a VCR set it to record. It was being shown at something like 1:00 in the morning on a Sunday.
Upon waking, I got my sister up early and we raced downstairs to watch. We did not have time to watch the whole thing that morning. It was winter, possibly the tail end of Christmas holidays, and we were off to the lake for one day. We watched some, went to the lake, had lunch at the Embassy, and came home to finish the movie.
I noticed there were far more ads to fast forward through on late night TV than during the day!
Actual ads from the actual tape of the actual night.
My sister recalls liking Kiss Meets the Phantom; my memories are quite different. I was bored to tears any time Kiss wasn’t on screen, and you had to wait through, like, an hour (with ads) for Kiss to arrive at the bloody park! I didn’t know who this Anthony Zerbe fellow was, but at age 13 I considered him possibly the worst actor I had ever seen.
It was my first time seeing Peter Criss on video and not just still photos, and I was surprised at his voice. I told everyone, “Peter Criss sounds like Aquaman.” I had the show right, but the character wrong. Michael Bell did the voice of Peter Criss in Kiss Meets the Phantom, and Wonder Twin Zan in the cartoon Superfriends. Legend has it that this was because Peter didn’t show up to loop his lines in post-production. Whatever the case, it led to a different urban legends: that Peter Criss had given up rock and roll, and taken up a lucrative career as a cartoon voice actor!
I thought Gene’s distorted voice was tiresome after a while, and Paul seemed the coolest. My sister liked that Kiss were like superheroes with powers. On the other hand, I didn’t like that. If Paul Stanley couldn’t shoot a laser beam out of his eye in real life, I didn’t understand why he would in this movie. They were still Kiss, still playing the same Kiss songs, but also super-powered. My rigid brain couldn’t reconcile the two.
As for the music, the movie contains several songs that I heard for the very first time that day. “Beth” (acoustic, no less), “Shout It Out Loud”, “God of Thunder” and “I Stole Your Love”. (“Rip and Destroy” doesn’t count.) Now, because I didn’t know these songs, and there were no captions, I had to guess at the titles. “Shout It Out Loud” was the easy one. But these were the live versions taken from Alive II, fast and reckless. Not to mention we were hearing it on a TV with mono speaker; state of the art for the time, but not for proper music listening. So that’s why, for that day at least, I thought “God of Thunder” was “Not a Doctor”, and “I Stole Your Love” was something that sounded like “I Ho-Jo-Ho”.
The process of discovering Kiss was so memorable because it’s so fun. The superhero character aspect appealed to my sister and there’s no denying that it had something to do with why I loved Kiss too. But hearing the songs and albums for the first time can only happen once. And I can clearly remember a tinge of sadness when I finally acquired Rock and Roll Over, the last original Kiss album I needed to finish my collection. I was starkly aware that I was having this experience for the last time: hearing a classic Kiss album, guessing who was singing the songs by the title alone, and discovering hidden favourites. As I learned when Crazy Nights came out, hearing a new Kiss album was simply not the same as discovering the classics!
Kiss Meets the Phantom was a struggle to sit through then, but fortunately I saw it at an age when Kiss still seemed larger than life. Objectively, it is a pretty terrible film, best enjoyed as a trainwreck. The best parts are the concert scenes, which was the closest I got to seeing Kiss live at age 13. It was my first exposure to some really important songs even if I wondered why Gene was singing about being “Not a Doctor”!
Always nice to repost a seasonal classic. Enjoy this Halloween tale.
RECORD STORE TALES Part 241: Halloween, KISS style!
Our annual inventory count fell on October 31. For five years straight, I never got to dress up, hand out candy, or do anything fun on Halloween because I was too busy counting discs and CD towers! However in the early days, this wasn’t the case. Halloween 1996 was actually a pretty good one.
Like most malls, ours had a few Halloween contests. T-Rev entered the store in the Pumpkin Carving category. He and I came up with the plan to do a Kiss pumpkin. T-Rev, the store owner’s brother, and myself gathered in my mom’s workshop in the basement. My mom had plenty of paint, and I was good at drawing the Kiss makeup designs. T-Rev had the idea to make the pumpkin Gene Simmons, and figured out how to make a pumpkin tongue stick out. I must say he did an amazing job.
The first step was to spray paint the pumpkin white. One of the guys did the cutting. Then, I drew the Demon design with a black magic marker. We thought the nose needed to be more three-dimensional, so I cut it out a bit. Together, we began colouring in Gene’s makeup. We needed something to define the eyes of Gene, and T-Rev thought of using pumpkin seeds. We added a wig, and voila!
T-Rev propped Gene up on the magazine stand outside the store. Immediately we started getting compliments, and the response was pretty unanimous: We had done the best job in the entire mall.
Unfortunately, the judges didn’t base their ratings on who had done the best job. They were only marking the results, whether the store employees did the pumpkins themselves or not! A store that hired a professional carver won first place. We came in second. There was no prize for second. T-Rev and I considered that to be cheating. Cheatie-cheatertons.
The contest was over, and not too soon: the pumpkin had begun to rot, as pumpkins do. That didn’t stop a customer from coming in on November 1st and offering him $10 for it. T-Rev accepted his gracious offer, even though the thing would be turning horrific in a day or two. A fool and his money, right T-Rev?
By 1997, the store had moved out of the mall. This was our last pumpkin carving contest, but at least we had the satisfaction of winning the popular vote. As far as I’m concerned, we went out on top. My personal consolation prize was later on, Halloween 2006. By this time I had moved on to United Rentals. They took Halloween very, very seriously at United Rentals! I dressed up as Paul Stanley, and this time, I finally won first prize!
The band’s newest album One Way Ticket To Hell…and Back was really resonating with me. It was the kind of triumphant rock that felt appropriate as I started my new life, post-store. Uplifting. Carefree. Nostalgic. I had a Darkness shirt with their logo in silver scroll. I was downloading rare live tracks from Limewire and buying imported singles. All the stuff that properly qualifies a person as a “fan”, but with the additional emotional kick that this was “my” band. I didn’t know anyone else who liked them. Well, there was one. I had just met Jen, my future wife. In her CD collection was a copy of Permission to Land.
Two weeks after quitting the store I was back in the workforce. I had what I wanted: a boring job! There were several days straight of just make photocopies. Nobody to talk to, and with the clanky-clank of the copying drowning me out, I passed the time by singing. Specifically, I sang my favourite Darkness tunes.
The most attractive tunes have the biggest and most bombastic choruses it seems. Huge drum fills, big multi-layered vocals, and all the trimmings. Songs like “Dinner Lady Arms”.
I used to be able to come close to hitting the notes. Just approximating the correct intonation, because who the fuck cared? Nobody could hear me.
Also on the playlist: “Hazel Eyes”, “One Way Ticket”, “Growing On Me”, “Givin’ Up”, and “Friday Night”.
I made a Darkness “Greatest Hits” CD with all those tracks, a bunch of great B-sides, and couple bootleg live tracks. The best of which was a ragged live take of “Givin’ Up”, sadly now lost. That’s the problem with downloads. In the golden glow of memory, it was the best version of the song ever!
Sadly, the Darkness were hitting a rough patch. Justin Hawkins went to rehab to clean up, and then quit the band afterwards. In shock, the band looked inward to new bassist Richie Edwards (who replaced original Frankie Poullain). His surprisingly powerful rasp was perfect for a new start. They reconfigured themselves as the heavier Stone Gods, while Justin launched his new band Hot Leg. In this battle, Hot Leg sounded more like the Darkness, while the Stone Gods had a stronger album in hand.
Lineup changes continued to ensue. Original Darkness drummer Ed Graham left the Stone Gods due to ill health, and was replaced by Robin Goodridge, formerly of Bush. This left guitarist Dan Hawkins as the only Stone Gods member that had been in the Darkness. Regardless, they managed to record a second, more stripped down album. This second album was never released, because suddenly in 2011, the original lineup of the Darkness was back!
The comeback album Hot Cakes returned the band to their classic sound. Most importantly, it was only the first in a series of great albums, the best of which might be 2015’s Last of Our Kind. The title track of which is the most quintessentially “Darkness” of any song they have released since their debut. The music video features Justin Hawkins at his most Freddie, and a new drummer: Rufus Tiger Taylor, son of Queen’s Roger. Talk about rock royalty!
Not to ignore the important contributions of Emily Dolan Davies, who played drums on the album and in the music video for “Open Fire”. As an in-demand session drummer, Davies was praised by Justin as having “revitalized” the band with her hard-hitting style. Since her departure, Rufus has held down the drum stool on Pinewood Smile, Easter is Cancelled and the forthcoming Motorheart.
That’s right. The Darkness have a new album coming. They may or may not have doomed us to a long pandemic with the prophetic Easter is Cancelled, but they sure are going to rock us anyway.
Today is the last day for Oktoberfest…but “Oktoberfest Cheer” goes on and on!
From the new EP Oktoberbest Cheer, written by Mike Koutis, here is the video for “Oktoberfest Cheer”. Have a schnitzel on a bun and a frosty cold one, and get your copy at Encore Records in Kitchener, or by dropping us a line here.
Mike Koutis – guitar
Eric Litwiller – lead vocals
Mike Mitchell – bass
Dr. Dave Haslam – drums
Accordion by Catherine Thompson
Notes: Since Eric deleted the only rehearsal footage of “Oktoberfest Cheer”, I was forced to use the video for “Randy” live at the Boathouse somewhat ham-fistedly. However this works perfect with the punky off-the-rails nature of the song. Speeding things up and slowing things down hides a multitude of sins in the edit, and the Keystone Cops flavour of the high-speed footage lends a comedic profile to the video. Which is necessary for any song that contains lyrics like “don’t crush my smokes, don’t spill my beer.”
mikeladano.com 