I really don’t give a shit what people say. “Oh it’s no big deal, I had a tooth out last week.” Well to me it’s a big deal. I’ve had teeth out before too, but never so seriously that they are advising five days of complete rest afterwards. Five days seems serious, right?
I was advised to treat myself to something nice to look forward to after the surgery, so after a lacklustre trip to Toys R Us (which apparently Rob Daniels didn’t know could be shortened to TRU!) I placed an Amazon order. And I ordered this sexy beast of a set.
It’s the first ever fully transformable Lego set, and it’s Optimus Prime himself. This toy has been getting (mostly) rave reviews so I decided this should be my get-well present to keep myself occupied. It has been about 15 years since I last purchased a Lego set. It will be fun to see how much the system has changed since I was into it.
So that was Sunday. Monday was a bit of a shit-show. Jen had three seizures, two of them in bed. I barely slept last night, but I made it through work today and now I’m off until next week. Poor girl really suffered yesterday. I worry about taking care of her during recovery. My parents will be pitching in to help since I won’t be able to do it all by myself.
I’ve been lucky to have plenty of support from friends. They know who they are!
Tomorrow’s the day. I’m scheduled for 8 AM. If I can, I will update you as soon as possible. I would like to record funny videos of swollen cheeks and muffled speech but I guess we shall see what I’m in for.
As a kid, I had heard of Coney Hatch but never particularly paid attention. MuchMusic rarely included their tunes on the Pepsi Power Hour for unknown reasons. I probably heard “Hey Operator” but nothing else by the band. Timing was not in their favour with me. I wasn’t even into heavy rock yet when their first two albums came out. No wonder they passed me by. By the time I dove head-first into rock music on December 26 1984, I had already missed most of their career. Ironically though, Coney Hatch did have a song on the metal album that I heard that day, which was Masters of Metal II and “Hey Operator”.
Fast forward to summer 1990, and a hot “new” singer was making waves on MuchMusic. I didn’t really know who this Andy Curran guy was, but my best friend Bob loved his song “No Tattoos”. Bob was pretty anti-tattoo and felt that the coolest way was to have clean skin. He really identified with Andy’s lyrics. “No tattoos, gotta stay cool, my mama never raised no fool.”
Personally speaking I loved Motley Crue and their tattoo sleeves. I didn’t identify with “No Tattoos” the way Bob did. “I didn’t listen…I was scarred for life. And I couldn’t just stop at one!” That whole “scarred for life” line was one Bob really liked. It was a good song and I liked it, but it didn’t resonate with me like it did with Bob. So again, this Andy Curran guy slipped out of my mind when the single was over.
Suddenly, the Hatch had a new live album up for pre-order. Their first release in ages and ages. I decided it was time to finally take the plunge with Coney Hatch, and I’m glad I did. Live at the El Mocambo is one of my favourite live albums now! And I got in on the ground floor with it, limited signed copy: 19 of 300.
And then we landed an interview with Andy Curran! At this point I had to cram so I bought all the Rock Candy reissues of the Coney Hatch albums, and the self-titled Andy Curran. The “No Tattoos” record, as he calls it. Interview prep is serious business, and I did the best I could in the given amount of time. But I didn’t want to fake it. When I found myself vis-a-vis with Andy Curran, I fessed up. I was new. I was a Coney Hatch rookie who had done his best crash course in a band that I was growing to love.
And Andy was so cool about it. In fact he came back two more times to complete our chat and answer every question we had.
Better late than never — check out Andy and some Coney hatch today.
Although I keep complaining about views being down, therefore ad revenues also being down, I have turned down an advertising opportunity for this site. Normally this would not be anything to write an article about, but something about it didn’t feel right from the start. Sharing my experience with readers might offer some interesting insight.
I have done paid “advertorials” in the past. Most notably, I received an offer from someone representing Guns N’ Roses to post a “review roundup” by a guest author. No problem. We agreed on a price and I was sent a well-written article with links. I posted it and the client was happy. I posted it as a guest editorial, since I didn’t write it. No issue from the Guns camp. Everyone was happy. (I had another advertorial offer from Kiss but I was on hiatus at that time.)
I frequently get offers to run ads for online casinos and other things that have nothing to do with music. I have always turned them down. This site is supposed to be about music, but it’s so schizophrenic topic-wise that I don’t want to make it worse by running articles about online gambling. Easy to say no to those, regardless of the money involved.
This week I received another offer from a search engine optimization company based out of India. The email was from a “Digital Marketing Executive”.
“I just landed on your blog fanpage ‘MikeLeBrain’ and was wondering if you’re accepting guest posts on your blog,” he asked.
I’m not sure what “blog fanpage” he was asking about, but I responded yes, I am accepting music-related guest posts. I let him know my rate in US dollars and he responded in the positive. He said the article will be well written, and according to my “blog theme”. But there were some conditions that we didn’t have with the Kiss or Guns N’ Roses offer. Some that bothered me included:
2) Links should be Dofollow – 1 Client link, 1 internal link, and 2 High authority links.
I don’t know what those terms mean and I didn’t get any clarification.
3) The post must be on the homepage for some time and it should be accessible from the home page (via a relevant category).
As readers know, I post daily. Not every article I post is going to be accessible from the home page forever. Generally people use the search function to find a relevant review. This condition made me uncomfortable.
Now here’s the kicker.
4) Article should not be marked as a sponsored post, paid post, guest post, etc.
That was a dealbreaker. Guns N’ Roses was clearly a guest post. They had no issues with that. If I didn’t write it, it’s automatically a guest post. That’s what guest post means.
I then responded that I had to decline their offer. The guest post issue was the problem. I explained that I had to mark a guest post as such. I’m not going to have someone else write words and then claim that they’re mine. No way. Absolutely no way.
I believe I made the right decision. The executive ignored my declining email, and continued on.
“We will send you all the details before sending the articles like topic, anchor text and client link for approval. After the article is written we will send to you for review. We do not want our post to be marked with any kind of disclosure. You can publish the article under your writer name, or our writer name.”
For the second time, I declined. It did not feel right.
“As I said before, I have passed on this. Not the right fit. Sorry,” I responded.
Here’s what really sticks in my craw: “You can publish the article under your writer name.”
No way. Absolutely no way. I’m not putting your words down as if they were mine. No. Way.
Sure, he added “or our writer name” but to not post it as a guest post? Just strange. Nothing about this felt right regardless of the money. I know I made the right decision, even if I’m losing out on money. My integrity is worth more than that.
RECORD STORE TALES #1013: “Joey” – The Joey Tempest Conspiracy, 7 Years Later
I think with the distance of seven years, we can finally put the Joey Tempest Conspiracy Theory to bed. “What conspiracy,” you ask? It all started in March of 2015 when a writer friend of mine, Tommy Morais, contributed an excellent review of the Europe album, War of Kings. He rated it 4/5 stars, and said “I praise Europe for giving us a true great hard rock record in 2015”. You’d think there was nothing controversial about Tommy’s review, but on June 13 of that year…everything changed.
A reader going by the name “Carrieanne” dropped a massive, monolithic comment one morning, explaining that Joey Tempest was no longer in fact Joey Tempest. He had been replaced by a doppleganger. A satanic one at that. According to Carrieanne, “since the middle of 1989, the real Joey Tempest is not in this band, and Joey was truly the only one who has made this group huge with his talents, awesomeness and uniqueness!! And since 26 years, there’s such a horrible imposter and liar in this ‘group’, that’s not the real Joey Tempest!!”
“The real Joey Tempest had to leave the group because of this horrible liar!! It’s so obvious and so clear to see that it’s just someone different (unless you’re blind and deaf, like bunch of ignorants [sic]).” On and on it goes, a massive diatribe praising Joey, attacking the fans who enabled the replacement’s acceptance, and of course, religious weirdness. “You are worshipping the devil!!!” said Carrieanne. But all is not lost. The real Joey, one day, will come back. There’s a really messianic angle to this whole comment. Carrieanne ties the lyrics to “Danger on the Track” and “The Final Countdown” to a prophecy of this great replacement, like biblical verse.
“Are you on drugs?” asked Jompa Wilmenius, of E-Tainment News. Reader Derek commented, “I can see you made the mistake of spilling meth into your coffee this morning champ.”
You can’t help but see similarities to conspiracy theories today. I’m reminded of Romana Didulo, a woman who claims to be the “Queen of Canada”. Canada already has a monarch and his name is Charles III, but I digress. Tens of thousands of followers legitimately believe Didulo to be the legitimate Queen of Canada, as she tours the country in a beat up RV and feeds her followers tins of sardines. And just like with Queen Romana, acolytes of the weird soon emerged to talk about Joey Tempest. Things got even weirder.
Admittedly, this next part is kind of my fault. With co-writer 1537, we cooked up a parody review of War of Kings, playing up the whole replacement angle. For example, we wrote: “Just look at the songs here! ‘Children of the Night’. The real Joey would never have written a song about ‘children of the night’, ‘California 405’ is the highway that O.J. Simpson was chased down – a definite clue that there was something more going on here than meets the eye! Why would Europe specifically reference that notorious highway unless they were implying some sort of wrongdoing behind the scenes?”
We guffawed and high-fived and hoped Carrieanne would drop another bizarre comment. That is not exactly what happened.
We laughed some more, as one person clearly did not get the joke. We thought it was pretty obvious. With lines such as “Joey would NEVER let his hair go flat like that, wake up people,” I really did think it was an obvious joke post.
We mocked Doreen a bit, but then shortly after, a new player entered the field. Miranda, claiming to be Joey’s wife, also did not get the joke. “Must post fast since I’m sure the guys in white coats [are] coming for ya,” she said. Miranda claimed to have Joey Tempest’s birth certificate, marriage certificate, childrens’ birth certificates, and a DNA report. (I’m not sure what good a DNA report will do us.)
I followed Miranda to her YouTube channel, where she goes by the name “TheMirandaTempest”. On this page, she has poorly dubbed her vocals onto classic Europe ballads, to create fake “duets” with her “husband” Joey. Joey’s wife, incidentally, was also publicly known to be Lisa Worthington, not somebody named Miranda. So now, we had two different delusions. We had Carrieanne who said Joey Tempest was replaced by a satanic doppleganger in some bizarre conspiracy. Now we also had Miranda, who was posing as Joey’s wife online. And things would get even weirder still.
We know now that there was at least one Facebook page posing as Joey Tempest at that time. Imposters, of the online variety, were of actual concern. You can see why as we go on.
As Miranda’s comment was thoroughly mocked by readers, others came to her defence. Doreen claimed again she knew the real Joey Tempest, but I think the person she knew was probably that fake Joey on Facebook. Once she realized that several commenters were trying to explain the joke to her, she became angry. She did not find it funny. Neither did Joey Tempest, or his wife, she claimed.
Ironically, I had heard from Jompa Wilmenius that the real John Levén of Europe did find it funny.
Soon, Doreen’s partner Billy Low entered the fray.
“Joakim Larsson [Joey’s real name] and his wife are personal friends of mine. They are also personal friends of my partner. We ask him to do cover versions of songs for us, which he does. We also met him recently. A fake? Plastic surgery? Don’t make me laugh! Are you one of those who is going to write a book about this, hoping to make money? If so, forget that idea. Anyone with even a shred of common sense would know that what you are claiming is pure fabrication. If l wasn’t so furious about this, l can assure you that l would laugh my head off!”
They met him recently. They. Met. Him. Recently. Whooboy. His wife Miranda…”You read what Joey’s wife has said on here,” said Billy Low. The person claiming to be his wife, who is not his wife, because his wife was Lisa Worthington, you mean.
It’s really easy to understand how the Queen of Canada has followers when you see stuff like this. She’s told her followers not to pay their bills, as Canada is illegitimate. She is the Queen, and she says don’t pay your bills. So these Canadians — homeowners! — are having their electricity turned off. This is happening as we speak. And they believe in their Queen even harder.
The very active comments section rolled on, with one comparing the situation to Matthew Trippe who claimed to be Nikki Sixx at one point.
From the comments’ IP addresses, I learned the following. Billy and Doreen didn’t even live on the same continent as Miranda, so I’m not sure how they are close personal friends. Carrieann was in Poland, and had the same IP address as another commenter “Someone X”. It was all so very strange.
Strange, yet in the context of what we see in the world today, pretty tame stuff. Nobody’s losing their house because they think Joey was replaced by a satanic lookalike, or because they pose as Joey’s wife online. As least, we hope they don’t.
Billy Low accused me of making the story up to write a book and make money. While that was certainly untrue, I admittedly did milk the posts for hits as much as I could. They were very popular! One or more of the Joey Tempest posts tended to stay in the top 10 for hits, for a long time. I won’t apologize for that. Entertaining the masses can be a thankless job. I probably earned enough in advertizing dollars from the Joey posts to buy a few coffees. Sue me, Billy!
This autumn presents three challenges. One is familiar, two are new. One is really bothering me.
CHALLENGE THE FIRST: Seasonal Mood Disorder
Hello fall, my old friend. I wish you’d fuck off again!
CHALLENGE THE SECOND: Kitchen renovation
Loyal readers will recall that our kitchen and bathroom were ripped apart last year after a leak in the building. Now it is finally time to redo the kitchen. Next week, this begins with a consultation and estimate. I’m not looking forward to all the disruption, but we’ve put it off long enough. Any survival tips?
CHALLENGE THE THIRD: Dental surgery
I never had my wisdom teeth out until well into my 30’s. I have one left. Now that one is starting to cause problems. It is also impacted against another tooth and neither can be saved. They both have to go. The surgery is scheduled for September 28. They have to knock me out. I’ve never been knocked out in my life. They advised me to take five days of rest afterwards. I’ve never done that before either.
To say this has been freaking me out is an understatement. Fear of the unknown. Oh, sure. I “know” everything will be fine. That’s not how anxiety operates. It ignores what you “know” and focuses on all sorts of “what can go wrong” scenarios. Whatever your brain can dream up. I have a pretty creative brain. I’ve imagined every scenario from a broken jaw to never waking up. You name it, my brain has already come up with it.
I have support and I have strategies. One strategy I have been given is to make fun plans for the five days that I will be out of commission. A Lord of the Rings marathon is one possible plan. I have also planned a series of posts called “Teeth Week”. All songs about or relating to teeth. I’ll visit my parents and go for fall walks.
Much like the kitchen reno, this is long overdue. Short term pain for long term gain on both, we hope. Thinking of the benefits. Toothaches gone would be a plus. A nice kitchen would be a plus. Trying to focus. As a result, I haven’t been focused on writing and may have to put some projects like the Def Leppard series on temporary hold. We’ll see how it goes. I don’t mind telling you I’m scared.
RECORD STORE TALES #1011: The Principle of Moments, 39 Years Apart
A short while ago, the Contrarians did a discussion on Best Albums by Artists Who Left a Band in Their Prime. Uncle Meat participated in this discussion, and selected Robert Plant’s 1983 album The Principle of Moments for his pick. As most readers know, Uncle Meat has done a lot of music discussions but has never had an album to show off like other participants tend to have. He decided to do something different for this special episode, and went looking for a used CD copy to show.
The Meat Man took a walk over to Encore Records, who did have a copy in stock. Meat was pleased, purchased the CD and brought it home with him. Only then did he realize something very unique about this specific CD purchase.
Meat originally bought the album back in 1983 on vinyl, at Sam the Record Man in downtown Kitchener. He actually went in looking for Metal Health by Quiet Riot. Approaching the counter, the legendary Al King was working that day and was opening a box of new arrivals. “New Robert Plant is in,” he said. So Meat bought that too. A lifelong love affair with The Principle of Moments had begun.
Meat realized that he bought The Principle of Moments in 2022 from the same man who sold it to him in 1983: Al King. Today Al works at Encore, still selling great music to the masses, a public service we are grateful for. But what are the chances? 39 years apart, the same man sold the same album to the same guy. Different format, different store. Same album, same two guys. One in a million?
Welcome to this “Behind the Scenes” instalment of Record Store Tales! Just a quick update on music, writing, and other assorted goings-on! The soundtrack for me writing this is the new Marillion album, An Hour Before It’s Dark. Great album.
Things are rolling on, and we are enjoying our summer. Together. Jen and I have not spent this much time together in years. I’m happy to report that we still enjoy each other’s company. I have to tell you, I don’t miss the show. The LeBrain Train – remember the LeBrain Train? Instead of broadcasting to YouTube every Friday night, we’re enjoying the sunset. I’m sorry if that’s hard news, but I don’t miss it. I can’t help how I feel. On the other hand, as many of you know, I tend to get depressed in the fall and winter. I like to have strategies to cope with the depression, and for the last two years, that has been the LeBrain Train. So, I am certain that when winter rolls in, I will need the show back. It won’t be the same — I want to keep things fresh. The Meat Man and I have been discussing ideas. We will be back at some point in time. I know that because I know my depression will eventually return. The show, and you the viewers, help me cope.
Be patient. It’s not time yet. I will know when it feels right. Summer is short in Canada. We only get so many weeks, and before too long the days are short and the temperatures cold. I know some of my pals, like my good buddy Aaron, love the winter. All I can say is there are times I’m envious.
I’ve been posting daily, keeping a steady pace, but don’t be surprised to see “filler posts” pop up now and again. Kind of like this one. For me to sit down and spend two hours listening and writing every single night — it’s just a hard pace to keep up. You’ll know the filler posts when you see them! I was thinking of doing a “Sheik Week” – an entire week of posts dedicated to the tweets of the Iron Sheik.
Views are down, comments are down, but I keep on keepin’ on. Music and writing. It’s what I do. What I have done for most of my life. I’ve been branching out. Fiction is refreshing. The ways the words flow so easily when I write fiction, it’s remarkable! Writing a music article is hard work. Finding out the facts, confirming the details, describing the music…sometimes I feel like I am running out of words. I don’t have that problem with fiction. It’s so refreshing. You have already read The Adventures of Tee Bone Man, we have seven chapters now, and we are building the story into something huge. You’ll see. In my spare time I have also been writing “sexy fiction” that is not for public consumption. I have been inspired and the words flow easily. It keeps things fresh. I enjoy writing fiction. I need to find more ways to incorporate fiction with my musical writings here. I will figure it out!
In the meantime, I will be continuing to report from the lake with fantastic photos, rocking videos, and stories of our musical roadtrips. Jen and I met 17 years ago and I’ve never felt closer.
It has been a great summer. And it ain’t over yet.
RECORD STORE TALES #1008: Backstreet’s Back (in stock)
Little known fact, people: did you know that in the United States, the Backstreet Boys had a second self-titled album, with the same cover art as Backstreet’s Back? It’s true, and I know it’s true because I once had about 200 brand new sealed copies in the trunk of my car.
The 1997 self-titled Backstreet Boys (as opposed to the 1996 self-titled debut) was a compilation. It contained hits from Backstreet Boys and Backstreet’s Back. Some of the tracks were slightly remixed, others not. I acquired this box while dating “JJJulie”, the girl that dumped me while I was on the road opening a new store in Barrie. For the record, I don’t blame her for dumping me. I was miserable working that job. I only blame her for not waiting until I was in the comfort of my own home instead of a strange hotel room.
JJJulie and I dated for two months in 2003. If I recall the story, her mom owned one of those book clearance businesses. The kind of business that buys and sells old overstock from other chains. JJJulie must have got the box of discs from her. Unable to move the product, she gave it to me. Our store was crammed full of Backstreet Boys. I think I might have given her 10 bucks for the whole box. Then it sat in my trunk for months.
I did find some use for the box of BSB. We were allowed to carry two copies at a time in our bargain bin. We paid $1 to $2 each for bargain bin CDs. I sold two copies to the store for $2 each. I kept track of them. Any time we sold a copy (every few weeks), I would sell another $2 disc from my box to the store, for the bargain bin. That went on for a year or so. I probably moved about 20 copies from my box before I quit. Not a huge profit, but some small change for me. The store would have made double what I did with their markup.
I did all this on the sly. The owner would have said “No more Backstreet Boys!” I had to do some things on my own, even if they helped the store in the long run, simply because the upper management tended to throw one word at me repeatedly: “No”. They wouldn’t have complained at the 200% markup when the discs eventually sold, but they really had pickles up the ass. So, anytime I looked at the sales reports and saw that a copy sold, I went out to my car, grabbed another Backstreet Boys, and sold it to the store for $2.
When I eventually quit the store, I had an almost full box of BSB still left. I didn’t know what else to do with it, so I put it in the dumpster. Backstreet’s back…where they belonged! In the dumpster.
According to my Facebook memories, on this day in 2009 I was listening to a massive all-encompassing Kissathon. This was done so I could review all the albums before the release of Sonic Boom. The first run of Kiss reviews here on this site came from that 2009 Kissathon. By coincidence only, this past weekend was a mini-Kissathon, started on Thursday night with some music we don’t play as often in the car.
1. Crazy Nights (1987). Even the underdogs deserve some love. Listening to this album inspired me to write a new Record Store Tale about the experience of hearing it for the first time. You see, for me this album was unique. I got into Kiss in 1985 just as Asylum was released. In two years, I collected, listened to, and absorbed all the Kiss albums to a degree only a kid that age can. Crazy Nights, therefore, was the first “new” Kiss album to come after completing my journey through their discography. And unlike Asylum, it was different. I spent a morning writing up the impressions I had in 1987. As for the car trip, we laughed at some of the terrible lyrics and obvious musical attempts to copy Bon Jovi, but it was an enjoyable listen.
2. Dynasty (1979). After the Paul-dominated Crazy Nights, I wanted to hear something with all four guys singing lead. There are very few albums like that, and only three with the original lineup: Love Gun, Dynasty, and Psycho-Circus. I went with Dynasty this time. A short but very energetic listen as we passed through Palmerston, Wingham, and Whitechurch on the way to the cottage.
3. Gene Simmons (selections from) (1978). Once we hit Lucknow it was time to put on an album for the last 20 minutes or so of our drive. Gene Simmons was under-represented in our first two choices. Only two Gene songs on Dynasty, and only four on Crazy Nights. The Demon needed some love, and I wanted to expose Jen to some of his more…ahem…questionable material. We played a lot, some good some bad. The good: “Radioactive”, “Mr. Make Believe”, “See You Tonight” “Always Near You/Nowhere To Hide”. The bad: “Burnin’ Up With Fever”, “Tunnel of Love”, “Living In Sin” and…yes…”When You Wish Upon A Star”. I remember back in the old days going to the lake with my parents. Sometimes they’d let us listen to an album on the car deck instead of our headphones. My dad praised “When You Wish Upon a Star”. “Finally, a good song!” he said. Good song perhaps, but not a good vocal performance! I explained to Jen how Kiss fans were shocked and flabbergasted when Gene’s album was finally released.
As the gentle strains of Pinocchio completed their final crescendos, we pulled into the driveway at our humble place in paradise.
Our little furry friends the chipmunks began visiting, as did a pair of blue jays that I named Domaso Garcia and Lloyd Moseby. These blue jays were brave little birds and I managed to get a little bit of footage up close. However by Friday morning the calm turned to distraction! I worked on completing an upcoming list, my second collaboration with Jonathan Lee. If you recall, Jonathan and I ranked all the Kiss albums from worst to first a short while ago. Now we are finishing up another comprehensive pair of lists, on another band we both love (and you do too). When they are ready, the lists will be revealed…but not until they are ripe! I had to work on my list while the chipmunks and blue jays made annoyances of themselves, distracting me from my rock and roll duty. Therefore the peanut supply was cut off for the rest of the weekend, especially when the chipmunk ate his way through the bag.
Unlike the last several weekends, this one was fairly uneventful. We did get in a good swim, and some footage of crystal clear waters. Listening to Kiss (and then Judas Priest) on the porch, working on writing, playing video games and cooking meals. In fact the only “new” thing that really happened this weekend was the cooking of the Saturday steak.
For the first time we tackled a 2″ thick tomahawk steak. It was actually 2 1/2″ at the thickest point. It was fun to cook but the fat content caused lots of flame-ups so it was a matter of taking care. Jen thought it was the steak of the summer.
Traveling home was uneventful, until we passed Listowel (home of the original Helix). At this point, traffic was heavy. An impatient pair of blondes in a red jeep decided that passing cars the conventional way going to take too long, and so they went onto the gravel shoulder, and passed three cars including myself on the right. I gave ’em the horn as they endangered my life, and they didn’t even look over. I imagine the inside of their jeep smelled like Patty and Selma from the Simpsons. They had that kind of look.
A few miles down the road, I had an opening so I went for it and passed them, flipping them the bird as I did. They didn’t seem to notice, but they remained stuck in the line of traffic for the rest of the ride home. I never saw that red jeep again. This all happened to the tunes of Raise Your First and Yell by Alice Cooper. The exact song they passed me on was “Chop, Chop, Chop”.
We came home tired and had some naps. Funny that even though the weekend was less active than others this summer, we were just exhausted. I was too wiped out to work on a video, but hopefully that will come. In the meantime I’ll just sleep and wish upon a star.
Every so often, a thought or a memory has casting my mind back onto the old Record Store Days.
You probably don’t often think about a job that you quit almost 20 years ago now. Then again, you probably didn’t work in a Record Store.
It was the Dream Job. I always wanted to work in some way with music, and selling CDs was pretty high on my list. It truly was everything I had hoped for. I acquired hundreds of rare treasures, out of print CDs and things I never knew existed. I got them with a discount, and I got to listen to music every day. Lifelong friends were made. That’s something I never thought would happen from a workplace.
The Record Store also put me back in touch with friends I had seen in years. The Store was located at the local mall, the epicenter of the neighbourhood. Banking, groceries, and everything you needed could be found at the Mall, and so a lot of the people I went to school with drifted in through my doors. Some managed to stay in touch since then, thanks to social media. I would not trade those connections for the world.
I know a young fella who now works at one of the many stores that I did time in. It was one of my least favourite stores, in fact. I hated working at that location. The customers were not, shall we say, the upper crust of society in that neighbourhood. But the kid loves his job! Have things changed, or did I get it wrong? That’s what I ask myself sometimes. Did I misrepresent those years in Record Store Tales? Was I unfair?
The first two years were really awesome. I looked forward to going to work every day. I got there early and stayed late. There is no question that the fun atmosphere changed when we started to expand. 10 years later I was having panic attacks. Too many years of a retail job that was treated with as much urgency as a doctor’s or a lawyer’s. Family came second. Performance was everything. Weakness was inapplicable.
I never looked forward to work anymore. I still got there early, but that was more to take my own time opening. Get ahead on some things. Listen to music. Fill orders. I still do that today in my current job. I arrive early, and slowly and casually start getting stuff done before we’re officially open for business. Make a coffee. Read some news. Answer emails, before the phone starts ringing. I don’t think there’s anything wrong with that, but the boss told me, “If you worked at IBM, coming in early to do extra is considered bad work habits.” I distinctly remember him saying that. I simply could not win with them. It was a record store, not IBM! Who cares what IBM do? They don’t buy and sell used CDs from the public.
I’ve said before that there were cliques at the Record Store, and I stand by that claim. I never felt like I belonged. I was the only hard rocking sci-fi nerd with severe social anxiety. I wasn’t hanging out with the right people at the right bars, because that’s not my thing. Being invited out to the bar doesn’t count. I. Did. Not. Fit. In. I stand by that. And I maintain that people in power did let their personal lives leak into their work life.
No. Upon reflection I feel like I was fair in my previous assessments. I will say that I am guilty of one thing in my writing. Once I knew that people at the Record Store were reading, I let that influence my writing too much. Too often, I wrote with that knowledge in the back of my head, whether consciously or unconsciously. Perhaps that was unavoidable.
Too many cooks spoil the brew, Wanna be the king of the world, Yeah, and too many jailers makin’ the news, Wanna be the king of the world.
mikeladano.com 