MOVIE REVIEW: Solo – A Star Wars Story [MINOR SPOILERS]

It is a lawless time.

CRIME SYNDICATES compete for resources – food, medicine, and HYPERFUEL.

On the shipbuilding planet of CORELLIA, the foul LADY PROXIMA forces runaways into a life of crime in exchange for shelter and protection.

On these mean streets, a young man fights for survival, but yearns to fly among the stars….

SOLO: A Star Wars Story (2018)

Directed by Ron Howard

We are dangerously close to Star Wars overkill.  With the announcement of:

  1. A new trilogy helmed by so-so director Rian Johnson.
  2. A new trilogy brought to you by the folks who gave us Game of Thrones.
  3. A live action TV series from Jon Favreau.
  4. And not to mention more Star Wars Story spinoffs (Obi-Wan? Boba?) and the only movie that really matters: the final chapter of the Skywalker Saga, Episode IX.

We are very close to oversaturation indeed.  Remember when you had to wait three years between movies and much longer between trilogies?

Fortunately, Solo is a welcome addition to the crowded Star Wars family.

Solo was one of the spinoffs conceived by George Lucas before he abandoned ship.  He’d been trying to do “young Han” since at least Revenge of the Sith, when he was pictured in concept art as an orphan raised by Wookiees.  Lawrence Kasdan (The Empire Strikes Back) and son Jon wrote Solo, so you can be assured there is a level of authenticity here.  Who better to write that space scoundrel?  Nobody.

And who better to direct than Ron Howard?  He came in under difficult circumstances after the firing of Phil Lord and Chris Miller, re-shot 70% of the movie, and pretty much nailed it too.  Howard also brought in some of his regulars (brother Clint Howard and Paul Bettany) and threw in a literal ton of Star Wars references and crossovers.  Solo is Easter Egg heaven.

Finally, composer John Powell created a soundtrack that is different yet founded in the Star Wars universe.  Powell hybridized new and old themes together into a memorable score.  He too included Easter Eggs, in his music.  Listen closely when [SPOILER] the marauder Enfys Nest and her gang arrives.  Powell utilised a children’s choir, as a clue foreshadowing Enfys’ young age under the mask.

Everybody was worried about lead actor Alden Ehrenreich as Solo.  Admit it, you were too.  Fear not, for young Ehrenreich (who is signed on for three films) nailed the role.  His higher voice is the only niggle that consistently reminds you that he’s not the Han you remember.  Similarly, Donald Glover fits into Lando Calrissian’s capes comfortably, including the suave talkin’.  Billy Dee Williams should be very happy with the new Lando.

The concept of Han as an orphan is retained, but instead of being raised by Wookiees, his backstory is more aligned with the old Star Wars novels.  He is a thief on planet Corellia, where he and girlfriend Qi’ra (Emilia Clarke) try to stay under the Empire’s nose.  Corellia is a shipbuilding world with huge, expansive scenes of Star Destroyers under construction.  When Han and Qi’ra are separated, he joins the Empire, as he did in the comics.

Han wanted to be a pilot, but got stationed in the muddy trenches to quell an uprising on planet Mimban.  Han, you see, isn’t the best at taking orders.  While enlisted on Mimban, he meets Tobias Beckett (Woody Harrelson) and his best friend to be, Chewbacca (now played by Joonas Suotamo).  Solo is swept into the seedy world of organised crime where he is delighted to catch up to Qi’ra, and is introduced to her boss played by Paul Bettany.  They both work for the dark, shadowy crime syndicate Crimson Dawn.

From an exciting pulse-pounding train heist to the Millenium Falcon, Solo keeps things moving.  It’s one big set piece after another, including the Kessel Run.  And yes, they used the novels as the source material.  The Falcon does indeed make the Kessel Run in 12 parsecs, getting a little beat up in the process.  By the end of the film, she’ll look a little more like the ship you remember.

The plot has its twists but you can foresee that some backs are going to get stabbed.  Han’s backstory is over-explained a bit too much for a single film, but there is still enough left to explore should Solo 2 be somewhere in pipe.  The truth is, the first viewing of Solo is less paying attention to the plot, and more looking for cameos.  Speaking of which, characters tie Solo into movies as diverse as Rogue One and The Phantom Menace.  You’ll see some stirrings of the early Rebellion, and Han’s intrinsic sense of right and wrong.  You might even see a giant “fuck you” to the Star Wars special editions.  [SPOILER] Han is definitely a “shoot first” kind of guy.

Things get a little muddled with a side character (Lando’s droid L3-37 played by Phoebe Waller-Bridge) with a passion for droid’s rights.  Perhaps a droid-based Star Wars movie would be interesting for the future, but it was extraneous here.  Solo is best when it’s giving you a tour of the Star Wars universe, from crime lords to the trenches on the front lines of the Empire.  Trench warfare on Mimban is directly inspired by the muddy fields of World War 1, and it’s far better than any of the Clone Wars stuff in Revenge of the Sith.

Unlike The Last Jedi, a spinoff movie doesn’t have to reinvent the wheel.  In many measures, the pressure was off.  Solo aims to be a fun movie that requires no connections to the Force or Skywalker family.  It’s a shame that it has not performed well, but that is not a reflection on its quality.

3.75/5 stars

Concert announcement! SASQUATCH: THE OPERA – composed by Faith No More’s RODDY BOTTUM coming to town

Guest post by Kathryn Ladano

Now that NUMUS‘ most recent season is finished, I just want to say that next season, I can’t friggin’ wait to present Sasquatch: The Opera – composed by Roddy Bottum of the band Faith No More. I saw this at the Edinburgh Fringe Festival last summer and knew that we had to find a way to bring it to Kitchener/Waterloo. It’s happening in February 2019! We’ll be doing four performances which will feature the original cast and the NUMUS orchestra led by Roddy himself!

February 14, 15, 16 and 17, 2019.  Registry Theatre, Waterloo.

Read more at the Guardian: Bigfoot and me: Roddy Bottum on his avant garde monster opera

 

 

#685: First Signs of Sausagefest

GETTING MORE TALE #685: First Signs of Sausagefest

To quote Bon Jon Bovi, it feels somethin’ like summertime.

Ever since my first time back in ’06, summer is about Sausagefest.  It’s just a month away now and I can already feel the cool waters of the Beaver River on my feet.

It has been hot in Ontario this past week.  I have been sporting my hair long, but the sweaty heat is a severe deterrent.  I originally wanted to try have bangin’ long hair at Sausagefest for the first time this summer.  That’s not gonna happen.  I have surrendered to the summer.  The hair is gone.  The first sign of Sausagefest has arrived:  my shaved head.

 

Before & After

Other preparations are under way.  Several weeks ago, Uncle Meat gave me the list of songs for me to introduce.  I’m very excited because the ideas started poppin’ right away.  I have been gathering funny audio bits for almost a year now, but I have pared them all down to the funniest.  I learned from last year when I took everything to excess, and I think this time I have distilled all my stuff down to the crème de la crème. Trimmed away a lot of fat.

Just as, I hope, the Lamb Lord will be trimming the fat on his massive side of lamb for the BBQ once again.

Now that the hair decision has been made, I have been pondering some new purchases for this year’s Fest.

This will be the last Sausagefest for the old Pontiac.  I’ll be getting something bigger in the fall.  Space in the car is an issue, since I drive two people and all their stuff.  But I want to make room for this baby below.

Someone brought Jon Snow’s sword one year, and I have been known to sport a machete on my belt.  This year, perhaps a more practical weapon would be something that could light our way in the darkness after sunset:  a Kylo Ren lightsaber.

These beauty “weapons” are dropping in price, and wouldn’t it be super cool to have one as a nightlight? It would sure beat glow sticks. Not a small investment, however, and you wouldn’t want it to get damaged up there.

What do you think, LeBrain readers?  Is this a worthy investment?  Stand up and be counted in the poll below.

Keep in mind I could use that money for many other, more practical things.  New shoes.  New glasses.  A new tent. New Guns N’ Roses and Def Leppard box sets.

Check back and see where the poll leads and take part in the discussion in the comments.

Back to work on my recordings for song intros. Can’t wait to see the reactions this time.

 


From last year’s recordings

REVIEW: Ghost – Prequelle (2018 deluxe edition)

GHOST – Prequelle (2018 Loma Vista deluxe edition)

Reviewing an album on one listen is rarely wise, but Ghost can do that to you.  Their fourth, Prequelle, pushes the Ghost sound further into the 80s, while retaining their heavy roots.  Many songs could have been plucked from the year 1986, with that kind of melodic sensibility.  Remember how bands like Accept, Loudness and Kiss sounded around 1986?  Lush backing vocals sound as if assembled with care by Robert John “Mutt” Lange.  Guitar solos are cut from the stone of Mount Kulick.  Ghost leader Tobias Forge has never hid his pop roots, and they are clearly coming further to the fore.

With a bold image and faux-Satanic lyrics, Ghost have established themselves in the upper echelons of metal today.  That will only be cemented further by Prequelle.  In a year that has seen brilliant returns from Judas Priest and Stryper, Ghost complete a trinity of great recent records.  With a deft touch, tracks such as “Rats”, “Faith” and “Miasma” deliver hook after hook after hook.  Ghost never really wimp out, although their melodic skills are sharper than ever.  These songs are written straight out of the textbook, combining heavy and pop influences together in a witch’s brew of addictive audio.  The limits are pushed, with an unexpected sax solo being an album highlight.  They go epic and progressive too, especially on closer “Life Eternal”.

Two instrumentals do not (at all) slow down the love affair.  Two covers at the end of the deluxe edition (Pet Shop Boys and Leonard Cohen) are an interesting coda.  You can make good arguments for only buying the basic 10 song album, because it has a clear beginning, middle and end.  If you’re the kind of person who likes staying for the end credit scenes, or enjoys having dessert, then you should check out the bonus tracks.  “It’s a Sin” has the detectable Pet Shop Boys disco beats and posh swagger.  Tobias Forge’s evil Leonard Cohen impression twists “Avalanche” into something darker and sinister.

However you go for it, make sure you get Prequelle this summer.  The deluxe has a neat 3D cover, if that strikes your fancy.

4.5/5 stars

Friday Chuckle: Happy International Donut Day!

I don’t know why there is such a thing as International Donut Day, but there is, and it didn’t take much persuasion for me to partake.

Gourmet donuts by Debrodniks.  Face by me.

 

#684: Can Helium Make Me a Better Singer?

GETTING MORE TALE #684: Can Helium Make Me a Better Singer?

Short answer:  No.

Slightly longer answer:  Below.

 

Want to know more about the element helium (He)? Then watch Sir Martyn Poliakoff’s excellent video. He does not approve of how I wasted helium!

 

Want the real song? Here you go.

REVIEW: Stryper – God Damn Evil (2018 Japanese import)

STRYPER – God Damn Evil (2018 Frontiers Japan)

Timothy Gaines ejected from Stryper, unfortunately not on the best of terms.  He was swiftly replaced by Perry Richardson of Firehouse, who fit into the rock regime smoothly and easily.  God Damn Evil is Stryper’s first with the new bassist, but latest in a long string of credible and crucial Christian metal albums.

But first a word about Walmart, who refused to stock this album based on the title alone.

This exemplifies two huge problems in society today.  One:  the inability to think for oneself.  Two:  pandering in fear to the whims of the general public.  Walmart were afraid they’d get complaints about an album called God Damn Evil, and so refused to offer it.  It’s patently obvious what the title means; just look at the cover art.  God is damning the evil.  Spelling it out even further, the evil is clearly depicted as “money”.  (Maybe the corporate mega-giant doesn’t like this anti-capitalism message.)

Maybe Stryper should have titled this album God Damn, People Are Stupid.  You can’t buy God Damn Evil at Walmart, but you can buy Night of the Demons on Blu-ray.  Go figure.

The music is what matters most, and the word on the street is that God Damn Evil is their best album yet.

That’s a tough claim.  After all, Fallen and No More Hell to Pay are both excellent metal albums, and surely rank among Stryper’s top five.  God Damn Evil shares a similar heavy direction, and even matching cover art, forming an ad-hoc trilogy.  The new one is the heaviest of the three.  Fans were taken aback by lead track “Take It to the Cross”, the closest Stryper have been to thrash metal.  From guttural grunts to screams so high they border on self-parody, “Take It to the Cross” is aural shrapnel of the best kind.

The only other track that comes close to “Take It to the Cross” in terms of speed is the Priest-like closer “The Devil Doesn’t Live Here”.  There is no question that Stryper can make metal as gleaming as their heroes do.

More traditional is “Sorry”, a metal groove with a slaying chorus on top.  It’s one of many contenders for “favourite song”, along with a swaggering “Own Up”.  “Lost” reduces the tempo, but not the power.  The message is there too, but not overwhelming.  Anyone can headbang along.  The title track “God Damn Evil” is unexpectedly different, being a straightforward hard rock tune with an anthemic chorus.  Stryper fear no evil in “The Valley”, a heavy metal retelling of Psalm 23 (“the valley of the shadow of death”).  Another top track is “Beautiful” which bears a Sabbath groove the likes of which is the basis of the genre.  It’s melodic, but not a ballad.  There’s only one of those:  “Can’t Live Without Your Love”, available in Japan in two versions.  The standard 80s-sounding power ballad would stand proudly next to “Is This Love” by Whitesnake.  The Japan-exclusive acoustic version is even better.

The highlights are many, and filler nonexistent.  Without giving up a shade of their integrity, Stryper have managed to remain true to their origins and yet evolve into higher, heavier grooves.  The key is the eternal youth of singer Michael Sweet.

Although some still think Stryper are a synonym with bad 80s bands, you’d be wrong to discount them now.  Stryper may well indeed have done their best album in 2018.

5/5 stars

#683: I (Don’t) Wanna Be Elected

GETTING MORE TALE #683: I (Don’t) Wanna Be Elected

It’s election season again!  The climate today is nastier than ever, even here in Ontario, Canada.  We don’t have Trump, but we do have something called Doug Ford.  The last name should be familiar to you.  He’s the brother of the late crackhead Toronto mayor Rob Ford. Remember that guy?

The important thing is getting out to the polls and having your say.  If you do not vote, then I don’t want to hear a peep outta you later on.  Not a peep.

Voting is paramount, but unlike Alice Cooper, I do not want to be elected.  I can’t imagine what it’s like to put your name out there, only to have the media dig for all your old skeletons.  We’re seeing candidates apologizing for things they said and did a decade ago.  At least the media wouldn’t have to dig far for my dirt.  One look at Record Store Tales Part 7: A Shitty Story, and they’d hang me out to dry with the laundry.

No thanks!

Some rock stars have thrown their hats in this brutal ring.  Kid Rock has recently floated the idea.  We’ll see if he ever puts his money where his mouth is.  Not all who tried can rely on their fame for an easy win.

Nirvana’s Krist Novoselic gave elections a shot in 2009.  He didn’t win, but he did run for Wahkiakum County Clerk to make a point.  The state of Washington’s laws allow you to run for office for any political party — even fictional ones.  Krist made one up and ran.  We hope being in Nirvana was good enough for the bassist.

Wyclef Jean wanted to run for President of Haiti in 2010, but wasn’t taken seriously because he doesn’t live there or speak the local languages well enough.  He put in the paperwork, but did not qualify.  A former American Idol, Clay Aiken, got a little further.  Aiken ran for congress in North Carolina.  He won the Democratic primary by a hair with 40% of the vote, but did not win the seat.  Can’t fault the guy for trying.  It takes guts!

Yet, there are a handful of success stories.

In 2005, Martha Reeves (of the Vandellas) ran for and won a seat on Detroit’s city council. Jon Fishman of Phish got himself elected to city council of Lincolnville, Maine, making him perhaps the only rock drummer ever to win an election.

The most successful musician turned politician in history would have to be Sonny Bono, hands down.  He was elected mayor of Palm Springs in 1988, and was even mentioned as the mayor in a Beavis and Butt-head music video with Cher!  (“We need a chick that used to be married to some dork, and now she’s all wild and stuff.”)  After this, he served in the US House of Representatives, from 1994 until his death in 1998.

Unfortunately, Alice Cooper has never run for political office.  That’s a shame.

There are more, but politics are not for everybody.  At least we all get to vote.

But how?  Where do you toss your one vote?  Some feel the best way to stop “Ford Nation” from turning Ontario into a mini-Trumpistan is to vote for the New Democrats (or NDP) party.  Others feel Doug Ford is the only choice for an economically troubled province, laid to waste by 15 years of Liberal mismanagement, handouts and scandals.

Choose wisely.

When I turned 18, my first election was provincial.  I had been working my first retail job at a grocery store, and the issue that I chose to cast my vote on was Sunday shopping.  Working at the store, Sundays were the only guaranteed day off and I wasn’t eager to start working them.  The NDP party led by Bob Rae promised they would not allow Sunday shopping in Ontario.  I voted NDP for the first and so far only time.  Rae won, and almost immediately, made Sunday shopping legal.

Fool me once…shame on you?

We have some excellent candidates in my riding, including Amy Fee (wife of Craig) on the Progressive Conservative side, and former boxer Fitz Vanderpool for the NDP.  But the truth is, I can’t wait to cast my vote and get it over with.  Do you know how many political calls we had last night?  Had to be at least 10.

I’m sick of elections.  Wanna be elected?  No friggin’ way.

 

 

#682: Shady Street

GETTING MORE TALE #682: Shady Street

I like where I live.  It’s quiet.  There’s lots of green.  There’s a park across the street.  In the summer, baseball teams play there.  Most people here are seniors.  Not a lot goes on.  I’m probably the loudest neighbour, and that’s not saying much.  You can usually catch me cruising home after work, some Kiss on the car stereo.  That aside, there’s only a little noise pollution.

Down at the end of the street, let’s call it “Shady Street”, there is a meandering roadway that leads to a dead end.  This is my favourite place for morning walks.  The tree cover keeps it cool, and you never have to worry about traffic.  Therefore it’s a perfect stroll for hard rock on the earbuds.  Because it’s so secluded, you can throw in some air guitar if you have a good song going.  Nobody’s going to see you.  There’s nothing down there.

Well, almost nothing.

At the very end, right next to the dead end sign, is an old security camera.  It has been there for years.  To the left, a single long driveway dotted with multiple imposing “NO TRESPASSING” signs.  At the top of that long driveway, a large house with seemingly no occupants.  Many years ago, I read a story about a grow operation that was busted on Shady Street.  I assumed it had to be that house.  In the yellow pages, the address is listed as “Shady Street Electronics”.  But you rarely saw any customers, or inhabitants for that matter, going down to the very end of Shady Street.

Clearly suspicious, but the grow operation was a long time ago.  Walks down Shady Street have continued to be pleasant, with or without the earbuds.  Air guitar is still optional.

This spring, however, I have observed some unusual activity.

Two weeks ago, a group of three teenagers on bicycles sped down Shady Street and did not turn around at the end.  What would three teenagers on bikes be in such a rush to do down the dead end road?  It struck me as odd immediately.  I’ve never seen that before.

Last week, I crossed paths with a dirty guy on a bike heading down there, carrying a large black garbage bag.

I wonder if that house at the end of Shady Street is back in business again.

This is my neighbourhood, and I’m going to take my walks where I take my walks.  But I might leave my earbuds at home next time, if traffic is indeed picking up….