Oh, how I loathe lists! Readers seem to love “Top Whatever” lists; different kinds, but I sure do hate making them.
However, I don’t like doing things in half-measures either. So for this, the Top 15 on the 15th, I’ve gone one step beyond. Not only do you get my Top 15 on the 15th, but also a list of the Top 15 tracks to listen to from these 15 amazing albums.
As of today, here are my Top 15. These will change periodically, probably tomorrow, and again the day after. See why I hate lists? In the end I decided that I wanted to fairly represent some of my favourite artists. But enough whining from me — let’s rock. Spin these little bastards for a good time!
15. Judas Priest – Hell Bent for Leather (Killing Machine)
14. Max Webster – A Million Vacations
13. Queen – News of the World
12. Alice Cooper – School’s Out
11. The Beatles – The Beatles (The White Album)
10.Thin Lizzy – Johnny the Fox
9. Led Zeppelin – Houses of the Holy
8. Johnny Cash – At San Quentin
7.Faith No More – Angel Dust
6. Rush – Moving Pictures
5.Van Halen – 1984
Let’s stop here for a moment. The thing about my top albums list is, the top four never change. Four of these five albums have been in my top five for a long as I can remember making lists for. The order may change, but that top four have been my top four, forever. They are indelibly heat-stamped onto my grey matter. These are as much a part of me as my left arm!
4.Iron Maiden – Piece of Mind
3. Kiss – Hotter Than Hell
2.Deep Purple – Fireball
1.Black Sabbath – Born Again
Right there are 15 incredible collections of music, both studio and live. But let’s not fool ourselves. Nobody is going to listen to all 15 of those albums just because some guy on the internet who goes by the name of “LeBrain” said so. I have chosen to distill these 15 amazing records down into 15 key tracks. I’m sure nobody needs an introduction to the big hits, so here are tracks you may not have heard. If you have ever cared about rock music, then you need to listen to these Top 15 Songs from the Top 15 Albums, on the 15th!
1. Rush – “Vital Signs”
2. Black Sabbath – “Disturbing the Priest”
3. Queen – “It’s Late”
4. Iron Maiden – “Where Eagles Dare”
5. The Beatles – “Dear Prudence”
6. Johnny Cash – “San Quentin”
“If any of the guards are still speakin’ to me, can I get a glass of water?”
7. Led Zeppelin – “The Ocean”
8. Thin Lizzy – “Massacre”
9. Alice Cooper – “Gutter Cat vs. the Jets”
10. Deep Purple – “Fools”
11. Iron Maiden – “Revelations”
12. Judas Priest – “The Green Manalishi (With the Two-Pronged Crown)”
13. Alice Cooper – “My Stars”
14. Queen – “Spread Your Wings”
15. Deep Purple – “No No No”
Astute readers will realize that one singer appears on two albums. Ian Gillan was fronting Black Sabbath in ’83 for Born Again, and of course is best known as Deep Purple’s lead howler. Does this double appearance make Ian Gillan the greatest rock vocalist of all time? No. But the greatest does appear, with Queen on News of the World – Freddie Mercury!
RECORD STORE TALES MkII: Getting More Tale #426: The History of the Holy Grail
I don’t know when I started referring to this list as my “Holy Grail” items, but the idea is simple. I wanted to create a wishlist of musical items that would be my ultimate, most sought after records and CDs. For example, there is a rare Iron Maiden EP calledLive!! +one. It was released in Japan in 1980, and featured two exclusive recordings still unavailable anywhere else: “Sanctuary” and “Drifter” from the Marquee show. In 2014, I found a copy in Mississauga. Should I have bought it? It was $100. It was not in the budget that time. Will I ever see it again?
Those are the kinds of things I’m referring to as Holy Grails. The kinds of things that you see only ever one or twice in your time as a fan. When you find a Holy Grail item, how much are you willing to pay? I paid $300 for a copy of the rare live album marillionrochester on eBay. I don’t think I’ll ever do that again though. That was a once in a lifetime buy. (Only 2000 copies of it were ever made, which were sent directly to fans who donated to their 1997 American tour fund. It will never be reissued.)
In the digital age, curating a Holy Grail list has never been easier. My solution today is simple. I have entrusted my Holy Grail list to Aaron over at the KeepsMeAlive site. There, he has created (and continues to update) several bloggers’ personal lists as the Master Grail Search List. Using this list from our smartphones, we have hunted for items for others, too. The increased range provided by the Master Grail Search List has resulted in a couple scores.
While searching one of my hard drives, I discovered what is probably the very first Grail list I ever made, and it is over 10 years old now. Apparently I wasn’t calling it a Grail list yet (like I said, I don’t know when we started using that term), but below is my 2005 “Ultimate All-Time Want List”. I have since found a number of these…but have also added many more to my list! Check out the list, with added notes from today in [red].
Date: 2005/06/11
ULTIMATE ALL-TIME WANT LIST
To be modified and added to periodically.
In no particular order:
KISS – Chikara (CD or LP)
[I should have bought this whenI had the chance in ’96 at Dr. Disc in Hamilton! I blew it.]
marillion – Web Christmas 1998 CD
marillion – Web Christmas 1999 CD
[Still missing these two. I’ve downloaded them from their official site, which is nice, but not as nice as an original CD.]
Metallica – The 5 1/2 Year Anniversary Box Set LP
[Saw this one at Flying Monkey Music in Waterloo in 1997, priced around $120. I should have bought it. Scott, ourHeavy Metal Overlord has a copy, but he is also apparently immune to my Jedi mind tricks.]
Tommy Shaw – Girls With Guns CD
[Hahaha, what!? I don’t remember wanting this!]
[I mean, sure, I’ll take it, I like that one song…it’s a great music video too, all one continuous shot with no edits…but the CD is certainly not a Holy Grail item anymore!]
KISS – Alive III (Japanese CD)
[No longer needed, since the release of Kiss’ comprehensiveAlive! 1975-2000 box set!]
Iron Maiden – “Wasting Love” (CD single)
Iron Maiden – “Hallowed Be Thy Name” (CD single)
Motley Crue – Generation Swine (limited edition Japanese with bonus track “Song To Slit Your Wrist By”)
[FOUND,FOUND, andFOUND! All of these came from eBay. None were cheap, but I had a budget threshold for each under which I was willing to pay.]
ZZ Top – Chrome Smoke & BBQ (limited edition CD box set)
[FOUND, quite easily, and very soon after I made this original list. I just went down to Best Buy and bought it. Hey, sometimes it’s the simple way.]
KISS – Instant Live CDs (ALL of them)
[Threehave been FOUND! I would still love “all” of them, but I’m not made of money!]
I’m actually surprised to see so many items crossed off this decade-old list! Surprised, and pleased. I know how much I wanted some of these items, such as those Iron Maiden CD singles. That Motley Crue import also dogged me for years.
The internet helped me gain access to many of these. It has also broadened my realization of what lay in the nooks and crannies of a band’s discography. When I made this list 10 years ago, I didn’t even know about Maiden’s Live!! +one EP. I didn’t know that the same band’s Best of the Beast 6 LP box set had one exclusive bonus track (“Revelations” live) that was tucked away unnoticed. As I have crossed items off my list, two more sprang forth in their place!
The world of Rock and Roll fandom is filled with many varieties: The Uber Fan who owns everything, the Casual Fan who owns what they want, and the Obsessed Fan. They have a complete set of Tico Torres’ toe nails, and a collection of restraining orders against them. These are just some examples. There are many more fan types, across every genre of music. While I’m usually more interested in the collections of the Uber Fan, sometimes the Obsessed can provide hours of entertaining befuddlement.
Based on limited exposure to one of these categories, we at LeBrain HQ have scientifically determined that the rock band Europe have an inordinate amount of Obsessed Fans. What it is specifically that attracts them to the authors of “Let the Good Times Rock” and “Cherokee”, Trump only knows. But there is a particularly vehement subsect of the obsessed focusing specifically on their lead singer Joey Tempest, aka Rolf Magnus Joakim Larsson (he of the well-coifed head). We have first-hand evidence of this, presented below.
Our first encounter with an Obsessed Tempest Fan came with someone called “Carieann”, in June. “Carieann” insisted that Joey Tempest was not really Joey Tempest. An excerpt from her lengthy comment:
“This is for all those who say that the band Europe is still great or that still make great albums – STOP writing such a shocking nonsenses and stupidities!! All last albums are false and absolutely horrible and this fake band has nothing in common with the real group Europe from the 80’s, now they make fake records, fake and lifeless music without a soul, fake “shows”, all is fake and false and that’s because since the middle of 1989 the real Joey Tempest is not in this band and Joey was truly the only one who has made this group huge with his talents, awesomeness and uniqueness!! And since 26 years there’s such a horrible imposter and liar in this “group”, that’s not the real Joey Tempest!! The real Joey Tempest had to leave the group because of this horrible liar!! It’s so obvious and so clear to see that it’s just someone different (unless you’re blind and deaf, like bunch of ignorants).”
OK, then. But things took on a religious slant:
“This horrid demon also released solo albums under the name of Joey, still insolently pretending to be Joey Tempest!!! And this disgusting, hideous and rude imposter has nothing in common with the real Joey Tempest, Europe’s vocalist in 1982-1989, not only his looks and sound of voice are completely different but also behaviour, eyes, facial features, personality and absolutely everything!! And the excuse that it could be because the years have passed, it’s just such a stupid and lame excuse!!! This is just a totally different person!! It’s not even a person, he acts like some kind of a devil!! He isn’t even real Joey’ Tempest’s look-alike and never, ever will be like Joey!!! […] There’s not even comparison between him and the real Joey Tempest!! This demonic devil only cares about himself, this whole falsity and not about the “fans”, his main and the only goal is to make fools of as many people as possible to still gain more and more as long as it’s possible undeservedly and you all brainless idiots still help him to do this!!!”
Even though we are all “brainless idiots”, some Googling revealed that “Carieann” had been dumping steaming piles of this conspiracytheory all over the web since 2014.
Always looking to prod the grizzly, we posted a parody of a Europe review that lampooned “Carieann’s” comments. This parody review was loaded with over-the-top statements that served to underline just how weird this conspiracy theory is. I wish I came up with all of these statements myself, but it was a collaborative effort, with a Godlike genius of the written word who not only refuses to be identified, but has now hired 24 hour security for his premises. Here are some excerpts from that parody review, which we felt was a fairly obvious pastiche.
“Without Joey’s talent and unique abilities, the band is a lost joke; twisted and sad – imagine, it would be like Deep Purple without Nick Simper – just unthinkable!”
“Joey would NEVER let his hair go flat like that! Wake up people!”
“I have proof written on the back of a beer mat that in 1994 Matt Groening was forced to rewrite a Futurama episode that obliquely referenced the scandal. “
The article was credited to author “Jesse A. Jones” (a portmanteau of noted conspiracy theorists Jesse Ventura and Alex Jones), who is “Professor Emeritus of Applied Conspiracy at the University of Punkeydoodles Corners and author of ‘Paul is Dead: The Amazing Beatles Conspiracy’, ‘Lennon Lives! Why John Isn’t Dead’ and ‘George! Satan’s Favourite Beatle’.” Not to put too fine a point on it, but we felt this was a pretty obvious joke, especially with credits like those.
All a bit of an innocent giggle; some harmless fun, yes? Not where the Obsessed Tempest Fans come in! Several weeks after posting, this parody review was hit with comments from…Joey Tempest’s wife “Miranda” and her friends “Billy” and “Doreen”?! What is this?! More disgruntled minor celeb encounters to add to my collection?
At first, I took it all at face value, until I actually looked into Joey’s marital status, which was when it all got a little bit strange. All sources state that his wife is named Lisa Worthington, not “Miranda Larrson”. In fact a little digging revealed even more: accusations that “Miranda” had been making the rounds online “claiming” to be Joey’s wife. Then I found a slew of Youtube videos by Miranda: low quality “duets”with Europe songs straight from the album, claiming to be by “Joey and Miranda”.
Come on; we’ve all done it, haven’t we? I once spent the whole summer of ’90 pretending to be married to Lita Ford.
Read the whole thing unfolding for yourself. Follow the links below directly for the best comments by Miranda and her friends, “Billy Low” and “All-Caps Doreen” (aka “Caps-Lock Doreen”). If you’d rather read the whole thing from start to finish, then hit up the first comment from “Doreen” for the beginning of this…discussion. (?) Make a coffee, sit down and enjoy!
After intensive study (at the University of Google), we have concluded that not only does Joey Tempest have at least one fan who think he’s not really Joey Tempest (a mind-boggler in itself), but he also boasts deluded followers who think he’s married to them! At the very best, even if we took Miranda’s claims purely at face value, and assumed she is indeed the new Mrs. Larrson, then Joey Tempest has friends who have serious problems with reading and comprehension. The entire thing just went completely over their heads. That’s the best-case scenario here. That is the sunniest possible outlook.
The life of a rock star! We only see the glamorous side, but then you have this dark side dealing with obsession. Or, as the great man (the real Joey, I mean) sang on “Love Chaser”:
Someone’s at your door tonight, Someone wants your love, Is it real or just imagination?
(Posted from our secret underground bunker, Nunavut Canada.)
Sarca from Caught Me Gaming does much more than just video games (not that those don’t rock)! She talks coffee, she talks books, movies, and occasionally music too. I was thrilled to get this birthday gift. Check the video below.
Aaron got the same gift from Sarca for his birthday! Check his out over at KeepsMeAlive.
Thank you Sarca for this awesome rock and roll mug!
RECORD STORE TALES MkII: Getting More Tale #417: Tim-Toons! Brought to you by the makers of Brett-Lore!
Grade 10 was a great time – good music, good friends. In Grade 10 I witnessed Rob Szabo blow the school away with a lunchtime performance of “YYZ” by Rush. It was the talk of the school. I remember sitting up there in science class after, talking about the band with the teacher Mr. Marrow.
Mr. Marrow (“Joe”, for unknown reasons – his name was Paul) was awesome. Strict, but fascinating. Made science interesting. He did me a favour by appearing in my highschool music video for “Nothing But A Good Time”, as the pissed-off teacher. Marrow was a moon landing skeptic, but refused to elaborate on his beliefs when pressed. Like I said, a fascinating guy.
There was a kid in my science class named Tim, who quickly became known as “Pyro Tim” for turning on the gas for the Bunsen burners to see what would happen if you lit it directly from the tap. “Pyro Tim” and I later went to University together majoring in History, and we had more hijinks there.
In second year, Tim and I were hanging out a lot outside of class. We had a number of classes together including classic Greek and Roman history. It was us and a pair of really, really attractive blonde girls named Lee and someone else. (I can’t remember the other girl’s name — it was Lee I had a crush on.) We had become an inseparable quartet in class. We would study after class, or just hang out. One afternoon post-class, we watched Monty Python (The Life of Brian) and Star Trek (“The Trouble With Tribbles”), just like stereotypical University students in the 1990’s.
One thing that tended to irritate the three of us about Tim was his knack for missing classes (particularly Monday or Friday mornings), and then ask to borrow our notes afterwards. The ultimate moment of frustration was when he more or less copied an essay I wrote, and then got a better mark than me on it! I couldn’t believe it! He copied mine, made some changes and scored a better mark. How was it possible? Was he greasing the palms of the professors? He definitely liked to talk their ears off after class, all dressed up in his shirt and tie.
The frustration boiled in us, but mostly me! An old Klingon proverb says that “revenge is a dish best served cold.” It is very cold in Canadian winters.
Another Friday came and went, with Tim a no-show in class. So, we decided to sabotage him. With the encouragement of my two friends, I took two sets of notes that day – one for me, and one for him. I substituted the Greek names of historical figures with characters from the Beachcombers and Star Trek. I made events up and did absolutely nothing that would have helped him. He figured out my ruse and got someone else’s notes, and a better mark than me as usual!
All the rest of the guys from highschool that worked on Brett-Lore, our highschool rock-and-sci-fi comic book, had gone to different schools afterwards. I was the only one left to carry on the legacy. Enjoy these cartoons from my University days!*
* On the back of one sketch, I found music, lyrics, and titles that I was working on for song ideas. They include “The Seven Hills of Rome”, “Cypselus the Tyrant”, (gee, I wasn’t listening to Iron Maiden a lot, was I?), “National Anthem From Some Weird Planet Nearby” (instrumental), and “Hypnotize You”. For those last two, think Steve Vai and Skid Row respectively.
Back in May/June, we took a detailed look at the entire Aerosmith Box of Fire set (1994), including the original Aerosmith’s Greatest Hits(1980). What we didn’t inspect was the expanded 1997 reissue of Greatest Hits, now dubbed Greatest Hits 1973-1988, including an unreleased track.
Since this CD is based on the original Aerosmith’s Greatest Hits, it contains all the original songs. Because of the greatly expanded tracklist (from 10 to now 17 tracks), it is the preferred listening experience. The title is misleading: If it truly was the greatest hits from ’73 – ’88, wouldn’t “Angel” be included? “Dude”? “Rag Doll”? Yes, but this is the Columbia Records music, not the Geffen stuff. Casual fans don’t know that. Casual fans might see the title and say, “Oh cool…this will have some of the 80’s music on there.” No, it doesn’t.
“Chip Away The Stone” was released on CD for the first time on 1988’s Gems album, and there are a lot of fans out there who would name this as a favourite. Putting it on the expanded Greatest Hits is what we in the reviewing world might call a “no-brainer”. It elevates the album to a whole new level.
“Seasons of Wither” is a beautiful one from the early days, an acoustic number just a little different than your typical “ballad”. Fantastic song. “Big Ten-Inch Record” is loaded with horns and soul and sounds like classic Aerosmith. Be glad these tunes were added, among others. They’re all still great today, and not overplayed on radio or in concert. Of course you still get the songs you know, such as “Dream On”, “Same Old Song and Dance”, “Sweet Emotion”, and all that good stuff.
One unreleased song is present: A live version of “One Way Street”. This is actually a more recent recording from 1994 (so what’s this 1973-1988 nonsense?), and was also on a Walmart exclusive EP called Made in America in 1997. “One Way Street” is a debut album classic, and oh so very welcome here. It was recorded for radio broadcast, and the setting sounds intimate. Steve’s harmonica work is the high point of this great little-known song.
I used to advise fans to pick this up instead of the old, cheaper Greatest Hits. Today you can find it for under $5 if you know where to look. The price has dropped considerably since I paid almost $28 for it on US import!
RECORD STORE TALES MkII: Getting More Tale #406: All of the Aerosmith…
The following challenge was posted to me by reader chrisjcombs:
“I humbly request an entry that ranks —- in order of your preference —- Aerosmith’s entire discography. I would love to see where you’d place albums like Rock in Hard Place and Night in the Ruts when lined up against the likes of Just Push Play, Nine Lives, Get A Grip, etc.”
Having recently re-listened to virtually all of the Aerosmith, in order for my Box of Fire series of reviews, I had to oblige.
In order to give some ground rules to Chris’ request, I will have to stick to studio albums. I don’t own A Little South of Sanity, so for the purposes of this list, I will exclude live releases. I also don’t have all the different greatest hits, so I’ll leave those out too. What’s left is 15 studio albums. Since I’ve reviewed most of these albums already, I won’t be adding too much in terms of commentary. Let’s give’r!
After some deliberation here’s all of the Aerosmith, from worst to best:
I think Nine Lives is a real underdog of an album — a latter-day gooder, that often gets lumped in with shit like Just Push Play. Pump, in my opinion, is Aerosmith as close to a peak as possible, and very close indeed to the top of the pyramid. Sonically and song-wise, I think Pump is as F.I.N.E. fine as anything the did in the 1970’s!
I hope you enjoyed this list, and thanks to Chris for the suggestion!
There was a time in the early 1990’s when I ate up all the new bands coming out. I bought every indi tape I could get my hands on in search of the “next thing” in heavy rock. I tweaked early to bands such as I Mother Earth, Tonic, Sven Gali, and Big Wreck. I still have my old I Mother Earth and Sven Gali promo tapes that arrived in the mail! Then suddenly in the 2000’s everything dried up and there weren’t any more new bands coming out that I liked. I stopped buying music by new rock bands.
Until I got Permission To Land.
The Darkness are probably the last “new” band (well, they’re only on album #4 now) to come out of the woodwork that I truly love (love being a big word). I’m also pleased that in 2015 they are back once again with a new lineup, album and tour. The story of my Darkness discovery and eventual love was recounted in Record Store Tales Part 80.
A lot of people thought this album was a novelty; a spoof of 80’s metal like Steel Panther are today. They are dead wrong. While The Darkness have ample humour in their music (as did Aerosmith mind you) they are deadly serious as musicians. The guitar work here is quite excellent. You can literally hear Thin Lizzy dripping from the strings, and it doesn’t get any more serious guitar-wise than that. Justin Hawkins takes his vocals to an almost absurd length, but listen carefully. Listen to how cleanly he hit those notes back then. There are very few rock singers who can hit notes like that so consistently and cleanly. Everybody says, “Ahh, but he’s copying Freddie Mercury.” Well first of all, a) no he’s not, Freddie was a very different kind of singer, and b) anybody who can hit notes as cleanly as Freddie is worthy of praise, not derision.
Yes, the leotards are a bit much, but what about the songs?
The album is slightly better sound-wise than demo quality. I think I read somewhere that Permission to Land is little more than an independent recording released by a major. The drum sound for example is thuddy and annoying. However it doesn’t matter, because these adrenaline-filled rockers don’t need embellishment. The band themselves are all the embellishment needed. 10 songs: four singles, and several great album cuts make this record a winner.
“Get Your Hands Off My Woman” is more than just the four-letter-word is was known for, a great little metal song with volume and unstoppable pace. Better still is “Growing On Me” which also had a great video. “I Believe In A Thing Called Love” is just a great, fun song period. I had to have it played at my wedding, where I did the air guitar on the dance floor. There are ballads too — “Love Is Only A Feeling” is the power ballad that Steven Tyler wishes he wrote for the latest Michael Bay turd.
The album cuts are stellar, with “Black Shuck” leading the pack, which masters that AC/DC chug-a-lug. I love “Givin’ Up” as well, with its point-blank lyrics about drugs. I used to think it was a sarcastic look at drugs until Hawkins suffered from his own addictions, but it certainly can be interpreted as an anti-drug song. That’s the great thing about music.
After the success of Permission to Land, the band would grow perhaps a bit too fast for the fans to keep up with. That’s OK though. It could have happened to Kiss too, when they did Destroyer. If the second album wasn’t your cup of tea, that’s alright. There were plenty of singles from this album, with great B-sides to collect. Not to mention that the splendid Hot Cakes reunion album should be sampled by the curious.
Don’t underestimate The Darkness. They were, and remain, an underrated band who provide fun, fast licks, and fuckin’ high lead vocals in their rock and roll!
4/5 stars
Fuck iTunes, buy the CD and check out the action-packed booklet. Just like rock bands used to do it.
AEROSMITH – Box of Fire Bonus Disc (1994 Sony, only included in the Box of Fire)
Sony did a sonic makeover to the Aerosmith catalogue in ’93, using their new Super Bit Mapping technique. Each CD received a well due remastering job, and improved packaging, as you have seen here throughout this series. In 1994 these albums were released again inside the near-definitive Columbia box set, Box of Fire. Back when I was working in the Record Store, we stocked this one for over $200 brand new. I remember looking at that sealed box longingly, wishing I could peer inside.
The bonus CD included in Box of Fire was an added little reward for those fans who waited to shell out for the full box, rather than buy the CDs individually. In defense of Sony for the double-dip, I distinctly remember them announcing in advance the the future box set would include all the albums and additional goodies. Because of that, I did indeed wait to shell out for Box of Fire. I bought it used, at the store that Joe Big Nose manages today. It was in good shape. I just needed to replace a few broken CD trays, and the outer plastic sleeve was also missing (not a huge deal). I later found that plastic sleeve at another one of our outlets, and the owner “Billy Bob” gave it to me himself! (Thanks man, you have no idea how much that makes an OCD collector like me happy.)
The Bonus Disc has five tracks.
1. “Sweet Emotion” (1991 remix by David Thoener). Remember the music video they released in late 1991 to promote the Pandora’s Box set? That video featured a remix of “Sweet Emotion”, and it was released as a limited as a limited CD single. It’s a little longer and has a few things mixed louder.
2. “Rocking Pneumonia and the Boogie Woogie Flu”. A later track (1987) from the Less Than Zero soundtrack. I’m always in favour of getting one of Aerosmith’s numerous soundtrack contributions on an Aerosmith disc. I hate buying a soundtrack for one or two songs. Wanna know what Aerosmith sound like produced by Rick Rubin? This old rock n’ roll cover indicates, it’s kinda dry.
3. “Subway”. A cool instrumental jam from the Draw the Line sessions, but originally released on the 1991 “Sweet Emotion” CD single.
4. “Circle Jerk”. Another instrumental from the same period. Most fans who collect Aerosmith already had this one. It was the unlisted “hidden” bonus track at the end of Pandora’s Box. These two jams are simple and unadorned. They were unreleased for a reason, although they both could have evolved into cool heavy rock songs.
5. “Dream On” (MTV Anniversary). This live version from 1991, complete with orchestra, was from an MTV thing later released on a CD of its own. I’d rather have the song on this. It’s a brilliant version, best appreciated by the Aerosmith connoisseur.
The Bonus Disc is housed in a simple cardboard CD sleeve. This slips into a gap inside the Box of Fire, easy to miss and sometimes missing! If you’re buying a Box of Fire, make sure it’s intact.
Wrapping up this exhaustive look at the Box of Fire and all the albums inside, there is very little left to add. The packaging is cool; a sturdy box with orange flame emblazoned all over. The front door opens “garage style”, with a little plastic “match” as a handle, painted to look as if burned. Each CD, housed in its own jewel case, slides easily in and out. It’s a simply lovely way to display your Aerosmith collection, open or closed — when lined up, the CD spines form an Aerosmith logo! Each disc is numbered 1-12 (except the Bonus Disc), and can be differentiated from the regular retail versions by the numbered spines. If you bought these albums separately, they do not have the numbers or the coordinated spines that form the Aerosmith logo. That’s how you can tell the difference!
I’m glad to have taken the time to listen to the entire Box of Fire, in sequence, from start to finish. That’s something I haven’t done since I first bought it.
4/5 stars (for Bonus Disc and Box of Fire overall)
It’s impossible to view the 1988 compilation Aerosmith Gems as anything but purely a companion piece to 1980’s Greatest Hits. It purposely avoids overlap with that prior album, while providing a slice of the heavier side of ‘Smith. Since Greatest Hits pretty much included all the major greatest hits, Gems tends to focus on underplayed fan favourites.
Let’s check ’em off one by one.
1. “Rats in the Cellar”. I’m on record for liking albums to start with a corker! This one has an absolutely furious pulse, which in turn will set your pulse racing!
2. “Lick and a Promise”. Solid album cut and underplayed favourite.
3. “Chip Away the Stone”. Here is the reason I first bought Gems! This amazing Richie Supa song was only available on a 7″ single, and in live form on Live! Bootleg. Getting a CD copy on an Aerosmith album is a no-brainer winning reason for fans to buy Gems. “Chip Away the Stone” was accompanied by an awesome music video, ensuring that a new generation of Aero-fans got acquainted with it, in the wake of Permanent Vacation. This song can’t be topped!
That’s Richie Supa in the music video too, with the ‘stache.
4. “No Surprize”. Decent album cut from Night in the Ruts. A laid-back Aero-rocker.
5. “Mama Kin”. Believe it or not, good ol’ “Ma’ Kin” wasn’t on Greatest Hits! Including it on Gems was another no-brainer, since Guns N’ Roses put it on their Lies EP in ’88, instantly ensuring that millions of kids were hearing it.
6. “Adam’s Apple”. I’m always in favour of Joe Perry breaking out his slide guitar.
7. “Nobody’s Fault”. Brad Whitford’s apocalyptic metal stomper always deserves more exposure.
8. “Round and Round”. Same with this one. The songs are like a reflection of each other.
9. “Critical Mass”. From Draw the Line, when Aerosmith were reaching critical mass themselves. Regardless of the chemicals in their veins, “Critical Mass” retains the trademark Aero-groove.
10. “Lord of the Thighs”. Concert favourite, and about damn time we got a song from Get Your Wings!
11. “Jailbait”. Whoah nelly, hold on to your hats! Just when you thought Aerosmith were so wrecked they couldn’t even stand up, they surprised with the vintage-sounding “Jailbait”. Since material from Rock in a Hard Place was included, my only disappointment is that “Lightning Strikes” is nowhere to be found on Gems.
12. “Train Kept a Rollin'”. Closing with this one is natural. Aerosmith introduced this Yardbirds song to a new generation of rock fans in ’74, and then they did it for me in ’88!
I do need to address the elephant in the room, regarding the Box of Fire box set, in which Gems was included. I’m not really sure that throwing in an entire greatest hits album consisting of music that is on the other CDs, all but one song, was necessary. Couldn’t the soul exclusive, “Chip Away the Stone”, have just been included as a bonus track on one of the other CDs?
But that’s not the fault of Gems, an otherwise fine companion piece to Greatest Hits.
4/5 stars
Come back tomorrow for the final review in this Aero-series!
15. Judas Priest – Hell Bent for Leather (Killing Machine)
14. Max Webster – A Million Vacations
13. Queen – News of the World
12. Alice Cooper – School’s Out
11. The Beatles – The Beatles (The White Album)
10. Thin Lizzy – Johnny the Fox
9. Led Zeppelin – Houses of the Holy
8. Johnny Cash – At San Quentin
7. Faith No More – Angel Dust
6. Rush – Moving Pictures
5. Van Halen – 1984
4. Iron Maiden – Piece of Mind
3. Kiss – Hotter Than Hell
2. Deep Purple – Fireball
1. Black Sabbath – Born Again
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