sausagefest

GUEST SHOT: 30 Albums that Uncle Meat Thinks You Should Visit (Or Re-Visit) Part 1

By Meat

Music fans love lists.  Maybe it’s the Ten Best Bass Lines of the 1990’s or a list of the songs you wish you lost your virginity to.  I have always been a lists guy as the whole Sausagefest Top 100 thing would attest to.  So here is yet another list.  The albums listed below are not my favorite albums of all time, even though many of my favorites are included.  The point of this list is to possibly introduce to, or maybe even remind, this blog’s readers of 30 albums that I think need to be heard.  Maybe an album that in my opinion was under-appreciated.  Perhaps even an album that inspired me in some way.   Anyways, here are 30 albums that Uncle Meat wants you to visit … or re-visit.  They are in alphabetical by album title.  Enjoy

A EULOGY FOR THE DAMNED  –  ORANGE GOBLIN (2012)

I could have easily listed several other Orange Goblin albums here, but their latest album is an absolutely killer album.  Almost fusing some Black Crowes into their brand of Metal, these British stoner-rockers put out maybe the best Metal album of 2012.  And considering that there are only 3 albums on this whole list that were released before the year 2000, it feels good to actually get some new content in here.  The album ends with the title track, which almost plays out like its own Rock N’ Roll Western.   The band finally tours Canada for the first time coming up in spring of 2013.  As the late Billy Red Lyons used to say, “Don’t ya dare miss it!”

 

ACT III  –  DEATH ANGEL (1990)

Death Angel’s first two albums are pretty sloppy, sound-wise and in song structure.  Some very heavy moments, but at times it just sounds annoying.   On their third release, Max Norman (Megadeth) got his hands on them and it resulted in a polished sound and the best album of their career.  Gone were the high-pitched shrieks of singer Mark Osegueda that littered their first two records.  It really does seem that the band simply matured.  One of the best Metal albums of the 90’s indeed.  Definitely among the most progressive metal albums I can think of.  A must-have album for every true Metal fan.

 

ARGUS  –  WISHBONE ASH (1972)

It is fair to say that Iron Maiden and Thin Lizzy would never have the musical identity they have, if it wasn’t for Wishbone Ash.   Innovators in twin- lead guitar harmonization, this band never really got its due.  Interestingly enough, the sound engineer on this record is none other than Martin Birch.  Coincidence?  Meat thinks not.  I remember this album sitting in front of my Dad’s stereo for years when I was very young, and then seeing Star Wars and thinking that Darth Vader looked a lot like the guy on the cover of Argus. Check this album out and discover a part of where it all came from.   When you listen to the beginning of the song-clip included here, “Throw Down the Sword”, think “To Live is to Die” by Metallica.  Sounds like Lars and the boys were paying attention as well.

 

ARGYBARGY   –  SQUEEZE (1980)  

Think The Beatles meets The Clash.  The first two songs on this album are both stellar pop moments.  The melodies are McArtney-esque, and that is truly saying something.  “Pulling Mussels From a Shell” is pure song-writing genius.  “Another Nail in my Heart” is one of my favorite songs of all time.  Check out the incredible guitar solo in this song.  Funny enough, like the 2 previous albums listed, this was the band’s third album.  Maybe a trend is happening here.

 

BIG WORLD  –  JOE JACKSON (1986)

For Joe Jackson’s 8th release, he decided to go all out. An original studio album, recorded live in front of a New York City audience who were told to be silent throughout.  Capturing the excitement and spontaneity of a live performance, in which absolutely no post-recording mixing or overdubbing was done, this record is ambitious as it sounds.  It is all here.  You get Jazz, Pop, Punk and everything in between.  Jackson possesses one of the classic all-time voices.  When this double-album was released, it contained three sides of music, leaving the fourth side blank.  A landmark recording.

 

BLUE  –  JONI MITCHELL (1971)

This album came in at Number 30 on Rolling Stone’s Top 500 Albums of All-Time chart, the highest placing for any female artist.  So why is this album on this list?  Honestly because I still believe this album is truly under-appreciated.  Too many people do not realize how great this album is.  Simply, some of the best lyrics of all time are here.  If this album was any more personal it would contain a video of Joni Mitchell going to the bathroom.  Listen to this front to back when you want to feel like someone understands your pain.   A truly cathartic experience, when she played this album originally to Kris Kristofferson he was reported to respond, “Joni… You really should keep some of that to yourself”.  I am glad she didn’t take heed of his advice.

 

DOGMAN  –  KING’S X (1994)

It seems as soon as Brendan O’Brien (Pearl Jam/STP/Black Crowes) got his hands on King’s X, the band’s sound fattened up.  Thick, lush and pounding would be a good overall description of the sound on this album.  The songs are great too.  I saw King’s X at the legendary El Mocambo in Toronto and was standing literally beside Dimebag Darrell and the rest of Pantera.   While I love almost every song on this album, the title track is an absolute killer.  When the first Woodstock concert in 25 years began, it was King’s X who took the stage to kick it all off.  Check out this live performance from the old Jon Stewart show from back in the day and crank it.  One of my favorite youtube videos ever.

 

DUKE ELLINGTON & JOHN COLTRANE   –  DUKE ELLINGTON & JOHN COLTRANE  (1962)

This might be my favorite jazz album of all time.  Duke was 63 and Trane was 36 when this album was recorded.  With a running time of 35:05 this album is short and oh so very sweet.  Ellington’s “In a Sentimental Mood” starts this album off and it never lets up.   “Big Nick” is just a wonderfully happy shuffle.  True story: I once got so fed up with Metal that I became a Jazzatarian for a few months, listening to nothing but old school Jazz.  I started with John Coltrane and went from there.  I never did find a jazz artist after him that I enjoy more.

 

EL CORAZON  –  STEVE EARLE (1997) 

Simply put, this album is easily in my Top 3 albums of all time, of any genre.  True storytelling at its finest, El Corazon is a complete masterpiece.  It seems that sobriety allowed Steve Earle to realize how great of a songwriter he really is and on this album he branches out and removes any constraints of style.   Of all the 30 records included on this list, this is the one I am not asking you to check out, but I am TELLING you to check out.  Comparing the laid-back intensity of “Christmas in Washington” to the sheer power of “Here I Am” truly makes you appreciate the diversity of this record.   Steve Earle is THE man.  A lifetime Bro-mance going on here.

 

HEAD HUNTERS  –  HERBIE HANCOCK (1973)

Quite possibly the greatest jazz fusion record ever recorded. This record is a funk buffet.  Only 4 songs and all of them are great.  The YouTube clip here of “Watermelon Man” is the shortest song on the album, and is as original as it is velvety-smooth.  I find it hard not to do some sort of jig when this I hear this song.  “Chameleon”, “Sly” and “Vein Melter” complete one of the most influential jazz albums of all time.  Half of this album made 2012’s SausageFest countdown.  I suspect the other half will not be far behind.

Stay tuned for Part 2!

GUEST CONCERT REVIEW: W.A.S.P. w/ Metallica and Armored Saint – January 19, 1985

A treat for you boys & girls today!  A guest shot, a vintage concert review, and a significant one at that.  Remember when Metallica was just an opening act for mediocre bands?  Meat does.  And he’s back to tell you the story.  Enjoy the first guest shot of 2013, by Meat!

TALLICA

W.A.S.P. w/ METALLICA and ARMORED SAINT – January 19, 1985

By Meat

I was lucky at a young age to have the opportunity to see some great concerts.  The first concert of my life was at The Center in the Square in Kitchener, Ontario.  It was The Monks (remember “Drugs in my Pocket”?)  and I went with my childhood friend, Scott Hunter, and his mother.  I also saw the almighty Black Sabbath play the Kitchener Memorial  Auditorium, three days before my 12th birthday, on the Mob Rules tour on November 19, 1981. I saw Triumph on the Allied Forces tour play the Center in the Square, with my father not long after that.  But really my early concert experiences were mostly, and most memorably, with the aforementioned Scott Hunter.   I believe it was his uncle who had connections with a concert promotion at the time called CPI.  He would leave free tickets at Will Call for us at Maple Leaf Gardens or wherever the show was.  We saw the last Kiss tour with makeup at the time (Creatures of the Night tour) on January 14, 1983 with The Headpins opening.  Also saw the first ever Kiss tour without makeup (Lick it Up tour) on March 15, 1984 with Accept as the opening act.  As well as Motley Crue on the Shout at the Devil tour on June 10, 1984, at what is now the Ricoh Coliseum, also with Accept as support.   Many of these shows are quite memorable and monumental, but none so much as the first time I saw Metallica live.

I remember the first time Scott and I heard Metallica.  We would have a sleepover at his place every Friday night specifically because Toronto radio station Q107 had their “Midnight Metal Hour” on that night.  We would have first heard Metallica (“Seek and Destroy”) either late 1982 or early 1983, before Kill ‘Em All was even released.  Obviously it was an instant shot of Metal Up Our Ass!   Kill ‘Em All was released on vinyl and cassette on July 25, 1983.   I specifically remember  (but not exactly when) walking into a record store downtown Kitchener called Records on Wheels and buying that album, Anthrax’s Fistful of Metal and Van Halen’s 1984 on vinyl,  all during the same visit.   I also remember buying Metallica’s second album, Ride the Lightning, the day it was released.  Thanks to the World Wide Web, I know now that date was July 27, 1984. Starting grade ten that September, I was pushing Metallica on anyone that would be open to it at my high school.   There were a very select few of us who were die-hards and would have Sony Walkmans stuck to our heads at every opportunity possible.  Now I cannot recall if we got free tickets for this particular show, but I do remember how pumped I was when I knew I was gonna see Metallica live.

The bill was as follows: Armored Saint (with Anthrax’s John Bush on vocals), Metallica and W.A.S.P.  Yes you read that right.  Metallica was opening up for W.A.S.P.  I do know that further along on the tour, Metallica and W.A.S.P. would trade headlining sets due to the obvious buzz around Metallica at the time.  Here is a picture of an actual ticket stub of this show.  Note the price ($15.00) and Armored Saint being spelled wrong on the ticket.

ticket 1

One thing I will add before I go on.  Of all the concerts and bands I have seen multiple times live, it is kinda strange I only saw Metallica live twice ever.  One of the reasons for this is quite obviously that after their album Load (otherwise known as Mighty Load of Shit), I never really had a great interest in seeing the band live again.  But it is worthwhile noting that I have seen Metallica live twice and BOTH TIMES they were opening for someone else.  (The second time being the strange bill of The Black Crowes / Warrant / Metallica / Aerosmith on June 29, 1990 at CNE Exhibition Stadium in Toronto) Again, note the ticket price for this.  This was before The Eagles ruined ticket prices for all acts with the ridiculous prices for their shows.   To quote “The Dude”  I hate the fuckin’ Eagles.

ticket 2

So there we were, January 19th 1985 standing in line in front of the late great Toronto concert venue named The Concert Hall. It was freezing cold out, and windy too.   So since this was a General Admission event, standing in line braving at least -15 Celsius weather, you can imagine how cold and bitchy people were.  I recall the rush of metalheads being ushered  quickly into the venue.  The second I got in there I went straight for the merch booth and bought a Ride the Lightning tour shirt for me and a high school friend named Joe DeLeo.  After that, like seemingly everybody, I had to take a wicked piss.  After doing that, I was horrified when I tried to zip my probably really tight jeans back up, and couldn’t because my hands were numb from the cold.  My embarrassed horror turned to laughter as I turned my head to see dozens of much older and much larger long-haired headbangers all having the same problem.  Only in Canada I guess eh?

Sometime later, Armored Saint took the stage.  I remember them being great and how loud it was in there.  They were received well and that venue was filling up. While enjoying their set my buddy Scott gets my attention and points to the much-shorter person beside me.  Immediately I recognized him as Russell Dwarf from the Toronto band Killer Dwarfs. Their name was very apropos considering this band consisted of nothing but short dudes with long hair.  I can only imagine how this band got together.  Wonder if an ad went out that said.  “Metal musicians needed.  Must not be over 5 foot 6 inches tall and have long hair”.  I loved that first album.  If you don’t know of them, here is their first single and video.

It was time for the Mighty Metallica.  They started out with the first track off Ride The Lightning, the classic riff-monster “Fight Fire With Fire”.   At this point I was probably about mid-way to the stage in a sea of metalheads.  This was before the days of the “moshpit”.  This was more of a Hair Swarm packed with long-haired sardines covered in denim and leather.   It would have been about half-way through the show that I wormed my way to the front of the stage.  This was no easy task as I am sure you can imagine, however being only 15 and much smaller than the masses (with the exception of the Killer Dwarfs of course), there I was literally feet from what would become the best-selling metal band of all-time.  This brings me to a memory I will cherish forever.  The seemingly monstrous Cliff Burton was right in front of me.  I reached out and had in my hand, the bottom leg of his ragged bell-bottom jeans.  He tried to kick me in the face, and thankfully missed.  Can’t blame him either for trying to kick my head off, and honestly it was the first thing I thought of  when said legend died in a bus accident a year and a half later in Sweden on September 27, 1986. R.I.P. Clifford Lee Burton.  Check out this YouTube audio clip I found of Metallica playing “Seek and Destroy” from this exact show.  Gotta love YouTube.

Check out this set list of the show the next night in Buffalo at some place called the Salty Dog Saloon. (I couldn’t find the Toronto set list online but I am sure it is identical)

  • “Fight Fire With Fire”
  • “Ride the Lightning”
  • “Phantom Lord”
  • “(Anethesia) Pulling Teeth”
  • “For Whom the Bell Tolls”
  • “No Remorse”
  • “The Call of Ktulu”
  • “Seek & Destroy”
  • “Whiplash”

Encores:

  • “Creeping Death”
  • Guitar solo
  • “Am I Evil?”
  • “Motorbreath”

Which brings me to winding down this novel of a concert review.  How could W.A.S.P. possibly follow Metallica?  Well, I do remember chants of “you suck”.  I remember that the front was nowhere near as packed as it was for Metallica.  Maybe Blackie thought he could follow them by drinking fake blood out of a skull (which he did).  Here is a quote from Mr. Blackie Lawless comparing separate tours with both Slayer and Metallica and musing about this particular tour.

Blackie: I’ll tell you what was worse – us and Metallica.  It was our first or second U.S. tour.  It was us, Metallica, and Armored Saint.  When they (Slayer) went out with us, they were still an up n’ coming band, didn’t have a lot of fans, so there was a pocket of division every night.  With Metallica, I kid you not, it was like an invisible line was drawn right down the middle of the room, and half was theirs and half was ours.  It didn’t matter what we were doing on stage.  It looked like two opposing armies.  Sometimes we just stopped what we were doing and watched. It was a war.

I realize that the merit of music is subjective and it is all in the Ear Of The Beholder.  But lets face it.  W.A.S.P. really does kinda suck.  Some good moments but really not much to speak of.  During their set myself and others that with us were just kind of mulling about as most others were really.  It was during this time that a guy we were with named Kevin B. (nicknamed Little Dude) said that he saw Geddy Lee and Alex Lifeson leaving out a side door during their set.  Now to give some perspective on this, this person was a known bull-shitter.  None of us believed him.  True story:  Kevin years later had trans-gender surgery and now is known as Treva. But anyways, we shrugged this off as yet another lie from Little Dude.  It was months later reading a Blackie Lawless interview in Circus magazine that I read this quote.  “Geddy Lee and Alex Lifeson were actually at one of our shows in Toronto last year…. But they were not there to see us.”    A classic example of the Little Dude who cried wolf.

Meat

 

Part 157: The Year in Review / Top 5

RECORD STORE TALES Part 157:   The Year in Review

So here we are, the tail end of 2012.  While I’m sure you’re just starting to get your drink on, we here at LeBrain’s Blog are tirelessly bringing you the rock even into the wee final hours.  This is the time, traditionally, when we look at the past year!

We used to do Top Five of the Year lists at the record store, when we used to have our newsletter.  Unfortunately I don’t have copies of any of those newsletters, not a one, which is a real shame since I poured my heart and soul into them as much as anybody else at the store.  It would have been fun to look back 15 years and see what my top five of 1997 was.  I do know for certain two albums that were on it:  Accident of Birth by Bruce Dickinson, and The Colour and the Shape by Foo Fighters!  The rest have been lost to the dusts of time.

Hey, if any of you guys are still speaking to me and have copies of the newsletter, lemme know eh? ;)

Back to the present for a moment:

What can I say about 2012?  Before I even thought about doing my own blog, events were in motion that pushed me in that direction.   My good buddy Craig Fee invited me down to 107.5 Dave FM for an entire week — Stump LeBrain Week!  I spent a week on the air, with listeners trying to stump me.  There were even a couple LeBrain Weeks and an entire month of LeBrainuary, where every single day’s 4 O’clock 4 Play quizzes were mined from my own brain’s knowledge.  It was a blast, and left me hungry for more.

I’d always been writing Record Store Tales.  The oldest ones were at least a decade old on my hard drive, but I had no idea what to do with them.  I’d also been writing reviews — well over 800 of them on file before I launched — that very few people had seen.  Craig said to me, “LeBrain, you need to get blogging this stuff.  Write something every day.  If you build it, they will come.”

So that’s what I did, and I thank you for reading.

Back to the Record Store Tales:

I published Part 1 on March 9 2012, the beginning of the story, called Run to the Hills.  It was about the very first time I heard Iron Maiden, a date I’ll never forget.  And thus LeBrain’s Blog and Record Store Tales were launched.

Some highlights from the early months that you may have missed if you’re fairly new here:

So, if you have nothing better to do on this New Year’s Eve, there’s a good waste of time for ya.

And now that we’re done with the preamble…let’s get down to business.

LeBRAIN’S TOP FIVE OF 2012

5. TENACIOUS D – Rize of the Fenix

KG and JB cannot be stopped.  This album is the “Deth Starr” of rock, The D aim “To Be The Best”!   Read LeBrain’s review of Rize of the Fenix here, including all bonus tracks.

4. THE DARKNESS – Hot Cakes

I will never stop loving this band.  Welcome back.  Read LeBrain’s review of Hot Cakes here.

3.  RUSH – Clockwork Angels

My favourite Rush album since Counterparts, at least. Read LeBrain’s review of Clockwork Angels here.

2. VAN HALEN – A Different Kind of Truth

I’d never been more worried that a band would fuck up their big comeback.  Thankfully, Van Halen did not.  Read LeBrain’s review of A Different Kind of Truth here.

And finally…

1. KISS – Monster

You know this was gonna happen.  Aside from the fact that I’m the biggest Kiss fan around, it’s a fucking great record.  Read LeBrain’s review of Monster here.

Runner up:  Jethro Tull’s Ian Anderson – TAAB2 Thick As A Brick 2.

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

REVIEW/GUEST SHOT: Iron Maiden – A Matter of Life and Death (by Meat)

Photo0637This one arrived too late to slide into the schedule when I posted my own review of A Matter of Life and Death.  Better late than never!  Here’s the infamous Meat with his take on the album.  A more seasoned take, perhaps.  Enjoy!

That’s the Meat Man on the left, in case you didn’t know.

He’s a pretty big Iron Maiden fan…

SAM_1665

IRON MAIDEN – A Matter of Life and Death (2006)

The Reincarnation of Iron Maiden

To semi-quote a good friend of mine,  “I have seen Iron Maiden live…I have seen Iron Maiden live…a lot”

  • November 30, 1984 –Maple Leaf Gardens- World Slavery Tour (Twisted Sister opening)
  • July 20, 1999 – Massey Hall – Ed Hunter Tour
  • May 5, 2003 – Molson Amphitheater –  Give Em’ ‘Ed Til I’m Dead Tour (Motorhead and Dio opening)
  • August 3, 2005 – Air Canada Center – Eddie Rips Up the World Tour
  • October 16, 2006 – Air Canada Center – A Matter of Life and Death Tour
  • March 16, 2008 – Air Canada Center – Somewhere Back in Time World Tour
  • July 13, 2012 – Molson Amphitheater – Maiden England World Tour

I was 15 when I first saw Iron Maiden live.  I remember standing outside Sam the Record Man downtown Kitchener to get the tickets. Took one of those party busses up to Toronto for the show. When I saw Maiden this last July, it was hard to believe that the first time I saw them was 28 years earlier.  While there are specific memories from each and every one of those shows, the aforementioned A Matter of Life and Death Tour holds a special place in my concert-loving heart.

Having seen Maiden four times previous, I was obviously excited for another great show, but was also expecting another “greatest hits” tour with a dabble of new material.  What I and the other 15,799 concertgoers got was something else. I have seen a shit load of concerts.  But never have I seen a band come on stage and literally play their new album to a sold out crowd… from track 1 to the end.  I didn’t really even know the album that well going into the show.   But it was one of my favorite concert experiences ever.  I can imagine that rehearsals for this tour were quite extensive.  It’s one thing for them to get together and polish up “The Prisoner” or “Clairvoyant”. It’s another thing to rehearse all your new material and get it  ready for touring.  And this album especially…for these reasons…

  • The shortest track on the album is 5:08  (“The Pilgrim”)
  • This may be the band’s most progressive album, song-structure wise.

With all due respect to Dance of Death and Brave New World, I believe Iron Maiden had not released something this relevant since 1988’s Seventh Son of a Seventh Son. A Matter of Life and Death sees Maiden finding a seamless way to connect hooks within unpredictable progressive grooves. This band has always been linked with Thin Lizzy in several ways, but never more than this album.  There are moments where you start to actually appreciate Thin Lizzy more by listening to it, which I suspect may have been a conscious or sub-conscious goal in the creation of this album.

There is not a weak track on this album. There are several A++ songs. The opening track, “Different World” is as such and is and was a great song to start off a show.  “For the Greater Good of God”, the longest track on the album, sees Maiden showing heavy chops while somehow staying bluesy. “The Longest Day” might be the most progressive Iron Maiden track of all time. Also my favorite track on the album, “Brighter Than a Thousand Suns”, hypnotically kicks  ass with melody. Hey, that pretty much defines the band itself doesn’t it?

A Matter of Life and Death is indeed “Brighter Than a Thousand Suns”; one of the most important albums in the Maiden canon.

5/5 stars

Meat.

 

Part 136: Black Sabbath, July 22 1995 (REVIEW!)

Sadly, my concert review for this show no longer exists.  Ye olde floppy discs don’t exist anymore, and the site that once hosted the review (sabbathlive.com) no longest exists.  Therefore I’m forced to re-write this as a Record Store Tale.

RECORD STORE TALES PART 136:  Black Sabbath July 22 1995

July 22, 1995.  Tom, myself, and a few of the boys decided to go see Black Sabbath.  They were playing Lulu’s Roadhouse, the world’s longest bar, with Motorhead opening.  It felt like a step down for both bands, but the place was packed.

We arrived just before Lemmy hit the stage.  They ripped into a scorching set to promote their latest album, the high-octane Sacrifice.   I remember Lemmy introducing the title track:  “Don’t try to dance to this one or you’ll break both your fucking legs!”  At the end of their set, Motorhead promised to return (and they did a year later).

I remember Tom and I being blown away by Motorhead.  I didn’t own any — this show officially was what made me a fan.  I kicked myself for not really paying attention to them earlier, but better late than never eh?

Motorhead remain today one of the best bands I’ve seen.

But I was there to see Black Sabbath.  We moved closer to the front of the stage to be in position.  We chose a spot perfectly between where the two Tony’s would be, right up front.

The crowd was getting a little drunk and restless.  A fight started…well, I hesitate to really call it a fight,  it was over before it started.  We all turned around to see this big huge dude headbutt this little tiny Kurt Cobain looking guy.  Knocked him out cold.  Then the big guy realized everybody was watching and hastily made an exit.

Then, Black Sabbath:  Tony Iommi, Tony Martin, Cozy Powell, Neil Murray, and Geoff Nicholls.  What we didn’t know was that Cozy only had seven more gigs after this one.  Then he would be replaced by another Sabbath vet, Bobby Rondinelli.  And of course little did I know that I’d never see Cozy live again in any band:  He was killed in a car accident 3 years later.

They hit the stage to the classic Martin-era opener, “Children of the Grave”.  Sabbath’s set was sprinkled with tunes from the Ozzy era (“War Pigs”, “Iron Man”, “Paranoid”, “Sabbath Bloody Sabbath”, “Black Sabbath”) and the Dio era (“Heaven and Hell”, “Mob Rules”) and many of his own tracks.  They played three from the lacklustre new record, but at least three of the better songs:  an awesomely dramatic “Kiss Of Death”, the explosive “Can’t Get Close Enough”, and the filler song “Get A Grip”.

It was just before “Get A Grip” that the stagediving began.  Tom vacated the stage area right away.  “Get a grip is right!” he said to me.  “I’m out of here.”  Two songs later I followed him.  This drunk girl started grinding me from behind, so I took the first chance to slip away and catch up with Tom.

The one song I really came to see was “The Shining”, one of the best Martin-era tunes, and his first single with the band.  Sabbath delivered.  They also played two from Headless Cross including “When Death Calls”.  Neil Murray played the chiming bass intro to this song that I’d never heard before.  It was the only unfamiliar song.  I resolved to get Headless Cross as soon as possible.  (It took two months for Orange Monkey Music in Waterloo to get it from Europe.)

Vague memories:

Tony Martin was a so-so frontman.  Much of the time, he would spread his arms Christ-like and shake his thinning hair.  He talked a lot and I remember he had small, beady but friendly looking eyes.  He did the best he could.  He sang his ass off, although he had lost a fair chunk of his range.

I remember Iommi ditched his SG for an unfamiliar red guitar during the overdriven “Can’t Get Close Enough”.

I could barely see Cozy, which is my biggest regret.

I was pleased that Sabbath played a well-rounded set with new stuff.

Little did I know that the end was near.  Not only was Cozy soon to be out, but promoters cancelled much of the end of the tour.  Sabbath headed over to Japan, threw “Changes” into the set (OMG!) but were done by the end of the year.  For the first time in a long time, Sabbath were put on ice while Tony (Iommi) worked on a solo album with Glenn Hughes.

Meanwhile, the lawyers were conspiring to create a new/old Sabbath lineup.  By 1997, Ozzy was back, and the band now featuring founding members Osbourne, Tony Iommi, Geezer Butler, and new drummer Mike Bordin of Faith No More.

I’m glad  to have seen Sabbath with Martin.  He did five albums, and I like three of them.  I think he did the best he could under difficult circumstances.  He’s a talented guy, so it’s great to have seen this lineup especially since Cozy would be gone so soon!

Part 92: Jingles

We’d always done radio ads.  They weren’t mindblowing, but a lot of people responded to them.  You’d get people calling every single week saying, “I heard your ad on the radio.  You buy used CDs?”  Radio ads were also expensive, so obviously you wanted to hit a home run every time.

What I didn’t know is that we had a radio jingle.  I didn’t know until I started getting prank called by kids.  I’d pick up the phone, hear a couple kids giggling, and then recite this jingle to me.  Then they’d laugh some more and hang up.  I was perplexed.  I had no idea what they were singing.  

I went to one of the people in Operations.  “These kids just called me singing this song with our store in the words.  What the hell was that?”

“Oh that’s our radio jingle.  Haven’t you heard it before?”

Hell no!  If I had I’m sure I would have spoken my mind.  Later on I heard the actual jingle.  It wasn’t…bad…it was just…not good.  Today, it still haunts my darkest dreams.

Back in the day, the boss used to always ask our opinions on our ads.  “What do you think of this one?”  We’d throw in our two cents.  As the company grew we weren’t consulted anymore.  I’m not sure who was consulted, but it sure wasn’t us!  We had no issues being honest, positive or negative, and maybe we just said “that sucks” one too many times in the past.  Either way our opinion wasn’t sought.  But mine sure was given after the fact.  When kids start pranking you making fun of your jingle, that’s probably not a good sign.

The funny thing is, Meat already came up with a much better jingle.

Him and Tom used to eat at this greasy spoon place in (I think) London.  Tom used to say, “Man, the food here isn’t good, but it’s cheap.”  Meat would respond, “Yeah, just think about the money you save on the food.”  And that turned into a jingle.

In his best Michael McDonald voice, Meat would close his eyes tight and croon, “Think about the money you saaaaaave on the food!”  It was hilarious.

So, the next logical step was, “Think about the money you saaaaaave on the tunes!”  Perfect! 

The jingle was never used.  But what do I know?  It’s not like I’ve ever had my own theme songs played on the radio…

Thanks Marko Fox for the sound clip of the first broadcast of my custom made Marko theme!

GUEST REVIEW: Steel Panther – Balls Out & Feel the Steel

LeBrain will always be straight with you when he doesn’t know something.  I have had a few requests for a write up on Steel Panther.  The problem is, I’ve never actually listened to Steel Panther.  Maybe I should change that.

So I asked the infamous T-Rev, aka Trevor from the Record Store Tales to see if he could do a review. He could, and he did. Enjoy.

STEEL PANTHER:  Feel the Steel (2009) & Balls Out (2011)

  

Steel Panther: Your New Favourite Band, by T-Rev

Michael Starr, Satchel, Lexxi Foxx, and Stix Zadinia are Steel Panther. The X-rated, Spinal Tap-esque modern day Hair band.  Intent on bringing back Heavy Metal , with a sound that will impress any fan of the “hair” genre.   Formed with ex-members of various metal bands in the 1990’s ( Rob Halford’s Fight, Paul Gilbert’s Racer X, and L.A. Guns!) originally as Metal Skool (yes…Metal’s Cool) in the early 2000’s, and a brief stint as Danger Kitty (getting some recognition on MTV and the Drew Carey Show).   Feel the Steel, the first album as Steel Panther, stands out because of its period-correct guitar assaults, its bandana wearing 4-armed drummer and the spandex covered, lipstick sporting, teased hair bass player, (reminding me of Warrant circa Cherry Pie mixed with some early Motley Crue attitude!) and of course, its lyrics!

Feel the Steel has it all, killer riffs  (often mimicking classic tunes of the past like “Fuck All Night, Party All Day’s” intentional resemblance to Bon Jovi’s “Livin’ On A Prayer”)  Hilariously refreshing lyrics (like the first time you ever heard “Fuck Her Gently” by the D) throw in some top notch guest star clout (Justin Hawkins duets with Michael Starr) and top it off with manufactured “rock star” personas (a la Spinal Tap), and you’ve got all the best parts of what a hair metal band should be…SEX & DRUGS & ROCK ‘N’ ROLL!  Crazy stories of sex with asian hookers, sex with fat girls, sex with neighbours, and copious amounts of “blow”, all done in a way you’d never expect…even though it feels strangely familiar.   Sounding like it came from 1989, but containing enough modern relevance to remind you it’s current.   After about the first verse, I knew I was a fan for good.  “Eminem can suck it, so can Dr. Dre, or they can suck each other…just because they’re gay” screams Starr on “Death To All But Metal”.  “Two in the pink, one in the stink”describes the “Shocker” to newcomers.  And “You’re the only girl that I like to screw…when I’m not on the road,” Michael reassures his girl on “Community Property”. 

Balls Out, their sophomore effort, continues where F.T.S. left off.  A lot of the same sexual scenarios, but the music seems to have picked up another gear, with more focus on riffage (bigger, faster, louder).   The lyrics, however, are lacking the furious onslaught they had on F.T.S.   Perhaps because the initial shock is over, now I expect it!  There is more celebrity name-dropping than before…mentioning that Charlie Sheen “is winning in the bedroom upstairs”, and that Tiger Woods thinks “3 holes are better than a hole in one”.    A good album upon first listen…just didn’t have the impact that Feel the Steel did on me.  Having said that, this album grows on you…big time!  Like any good album…it takes a while for their sauce to mix with yours!

I should also discuss Starr’s instrument…this guys voice is classic, vintage, powerful, cheesy, awesome, hilarious, and adaptive!  Vocal range that would bring a tear to Dio’s eye, heartfelt (x-rated), ballads on par with anything Bon Jovi or Poison ever did, rockers that could have appeared on stage with the great Bon Scott!   I don’t mean to come across as though I consider this band “flawless”, but, these guys are PRO’s!   Certainly impressive musically…sometimes though, they sway over the cheese line a bit, and even take the lyrics too far, but all in all, I do love these albums.  Afterall, isn’t it the cheese that we now love about 80’s metal? 

You really get the feeling that these guys are true fans of metal, not just cashing in on the novelty of wearing spandex and makeup.  Much like the ribbing the Darkness took during their invasion, some people misunderstood the flattery for ridicule.  True fans see past the hair and hear the talent in the music…every time I listen to them, they get better!  Like a drug that you can’t get enough of…you want to hear it again and again.   In a world where Justin Beiber and Nickelback win music awards, this is a welcome addiction.   A perfect mix of metal and comedy!  Destined to become a staple at everyone’s annual “sausagefest”

Feel the Steel    5/5

Balls Out              4/5

Part 78: GUEST SHOT! Meat on LeBrain

Normally I wouldn’t post something so self-glorifying, but I won’t edit a word out of any of my guest shots.  This one comes from the infamous Sausagefester, ex-record store alumnus, and music connoisseur, Meat.  He sent this to me by surprise this afternoon, so I had to post it.   Enjoy.

RECORD STORE TALES PART 78:  Meat on LeBrain

Today is Lebrain’s 40th birthday.  Today seems like a good day to give you all my thoughts  on the man…the myth…the legend…Michael Ladano.

I would have first met Mr. Ladano in I believe late 1998 or early 1999.  I was working at a record store and really didn’t know anyone at other locations.  Since there was a fair amount of phone activity between different stores, it was inevitable that our paths would cross.  I kept hearing about the manager of another store that was something of a music aficionado, and the biggest Kiss fan in town.  Considering myself of the same ilk, and a long-time Kiss fan myself, I was looking forward to the inevitable.  I don’t remember the first conversation we had honestly,  it was probably some sort of inquiry about an Anita Baker stock transfer , but anyways,  I do remember the first time we talked about Kiss.  I remember his genuine enthusiasm hearing that I had seen Kiss on the last tour with makeup (Creatures of the Night) and the first tour without makeup (Lick it Up).  He proceeded to tell me that Ace Frehley was not actually in the makeup on the first aforementioned tour (something I already knew) and a bunch of other obscure Kiss facts.  Needless to say we immediately hit it off.  We worked together only once at his location.  He actually has a better memory of that one shift (Meat’s memory is randomly hazy…gee I wonder why) but I do remember that the shift literally seemed to go faster than any shift I had worked previously.

[LeBRAIN’S NOTE:  I do remember that night very well.  I remember driving Meat home, talking about Metallica’s medley of Mercyful Fate tunes.  As it happens, I had that tape in the car, so we rocked it!] 

I am lucky to know many guys who are self-proclaimed and ordained-by-others as music experts.  The mighty Tom has been mentioned in this blog before.  Others include Scottie Geffros…Scott Hunter and more.  Michael Ladano trumps them all in both knowledge and actual music collection.  No one loves music more than LeBrain.  I certainly disagree with a lot of music that Ladano loves, and have been very vocal to him about that, but I guess that’s just part and parcel with being “LeBrain”.  But most importantly, Michael Ladano’s greatest trait is simply being himself.  If there is someone who is more truly sincere and kind, I have not met them.  No one treated complete strangers better during his record store days than Mike Ladano.  No one loves his wife or significant other more than Mike Ladano.  The truth is  everyone likes Ladano.  As a matter of fact, there are only a very, very select few that I know that don’t like him.  Literally a few select people that all hang together and work together. Not-coincidentally these people are sincerely some of the worst people I have ever encountered in my life.  Truly lacking character, substance and kindness of any sort, they should be ashamed of themselves.  It says something that only the worst people in the Tri-Cities are the select few that don’t like him.

I really enjoy this blog Mike and try to read every entry.  Even old Meatdogs can learn new tricks, and I appreciate reading and learning about musical artists, bands and albums that I thought I already knew everything about.  Your love of music is infectious and impressive,  but not as impressive as Mike the friend, the person and the husband.  Is this blog-entry just alot of over-blown Maudlin? Of course it is. If anyone I know deserves Maudlin, its Sir Michael Ladano.  Remember, when the rest of you are sleeping comfortably at night…LeBrain is rolling in his sleep anticipating the upcoming Kiss and Darkness albums.  You gotta love the guy.

Meat

Part 75.5: Supplimental: Sausagefest 2012 Countdown & Pics
Gardenia Kyuss
Money For   Nothing Dire Straits
Dogs Pink Floyd
The Rime of   the Ancient Mariner Iron Maiden
Watermelon   Man Herbie Hancock
Simple Man Lynyrd Skynyrd
Holy Diver Dio
Aqualung Jethro Tull
One Metallica
NIB Black Sabbath
Fade to Black Metallica
Bark at the   Moon Ozzy Osbourne
Freebird Lynyrd Skynyrd
Ohio Crosby, Stills, Nash   and Young
Ophelia The Band
Into the Void Black Sabbath
Bring it on   Home Led Zeppelin
46 and 2 Tool
Time   Travelling Blues Orange Goblin
How Heavy   This Axe The Sword
Bullet in the   Head Rage Against the   Machine
Pick Up The   Pieces The Average White   Band
Postmortem/Raining   Blood Slayer
Jambi Tool
Sir Duke Stevie Wonder
Space Cadet Kyuss
School Supertramp
Green Machine Kyuss
Dazed and   Confused Led Zeppelin
Fool’s   Overture Supertramp
Suite: Judy   Blue Eyes Crosby, Stills, Nash   and Young
Aenima Tool
Lazy Deep Purple
Breaking the   Law Judas Priest
Hot For   Teacher Van Halen
Moby Dick Led Zeppelin
Immigrant   Song Led Zeppelin
Supa Stoopid Funkadelic
Helter   Skelter The Beatles
One of These   Days Pink Floyd
Ziggy   Stardust David Bowie
Love Gun Kiss
Highway to   Hell AC/DC
Golden   Slumbers/CTW/In The End The Beatles
Flight of   Icarus Iron Maiden
RearView   Mirror Pearl Jam
Number of the   Beast Iron Maiden
Hot City   Symphony The Sensational Alex Harvey Band
Ramble Tamble Creedence Clearwater   Revival
Free Will Rush
Marquee Moon Television
Cant You Hear   Me Knockin The Rolling Stones
Stand By Him Ghost
Black Water The Doobie Brothers
Goin Up To   The Country Canned Heat
Black Sabbath Black Sabbath
Ritual Ghost
Angel of   Death Slayer
For Whom the   Bell Tolls Metallica
Sex Machine James Brown
Whole Lotta   Love Led Zeppelin
Floods Pantera
Working Man Rush
Tuesday’s   Gone Lynyrd Skynyrd
Sober Tool
Killers Iron Maiden
New Orleans   is Sinking The Tragically Hip
Nobody’s   Fault But Mine Led Zeppelin
Folsom Prison   Blues Johnny Cash
Walk Pantera
Pigs (3   Different Ones) Pink Floyd
Bombtrack Rage Against the   Machine
Misty   Mountain Hop Led Zeppelin
Denim and   Leather Saxon
Ball of   Confusion The Temptations
TRIBUTES
Sins of the Father Black Sabbath
The River Tea Party
Mr. Crowley Ozzy Osbourne
Resurrection   Shuffle Ashton, Gardner and   Dyke
Stinkfist Tool
A Lil Piece   of Heaven Avenged Sevenfold
Naked Eye   (live) The Who
Suzanne Leonard Cohen
Finding My   Way Rush
Gato Devin Townsend
Shangri-La The Kinks
Sleeping   Giant Mastadon
The   Unforgiven III Metallica
Captain Nemo The Michael Schenker   Group
Eulogy of the   Damned Orange Goblin
Inside   Looking Out Grand Funk Railroad
Sirius/Eye in   the Sky Alan Parsons Project
Darlene Led Zeppelin
Search &   Destroy Iggy Pop
Woman From   Tokyo Deep Purple
Funk #49 James Gang
Between the   Wheels Rush
Jessica The Allman Brothers
Strutter KISS
Fish On Primus
Little House   I Used to Live In Frank Zappa
Laid to Rest Lamb of God
Mannish Boy Muddy Waters
Texas Flood Stevie Ray Vaughan
The Sixteens Sweet
We Built This   City Starship

Part 75: 2012 Sausagefest Report part two

Haven’t read part one yet?  Click here.

Since pictures speak a thousand words, I’m going to let the pictures do most of the talking this time.

The countdown resumed Saturday afternoon.  “Love Gun” from Alive II was my pick.  We were inundated with Mammoth, more Tool, more Maiden, and awesomely enough, “Watermelon Man” by Herbie Hancock, light years ahead of its time.  We also heard from old stanby’s such as Rush (“Between the Wheels”), and others like Crosby, Stills & Nash, Dire Straits, and Starship (?)(thanks Zach).

The #1 song on the countdown was Kyuss’ “Gardenia”.  Oh what a beauty.  Must get.

Meat’s going to post the whole countdown when he’s back online (see: last installment) which should be soon.   Thank God for warranties.

Speaking of warranties, my car deck had to be replaced.  Sausagefest’s rainstorm killed it, I guess.  It took with it the new Tenacious D disc.  But the unit was covered on warranty so all is well.

It’s always sad when Sausagefest is over, and we always look forward to the next one.  It reminds me of what it was like to be a kid.  At the end of summer holidays, sometimes you waved goodbye to friends and said, “See you next summer,” and you just can’t wait for next summer to come.  That’s what Sausagefest is like.  I’d do it again next week in a heartbeat!