#354: Packaging & Cellophane

RECORD STORE TALES MkII: Getting More Tale
#354: Packaging & Cellophane

As I sit here finally ripping the cellophane off some of the discs I received for Christmas, a pile of discarded shrink wrap sits before me.  I find the plastic waste problematic, but I also recognize that in today’s consumer market, you have to present your product as “brand new” or “untouched by human hands” in some way.  So they seal up every CD and DVD, ensuring that nobody got their sticky hands on the playing surface of your disc.  As an added bonus the shrink wrap protects the CD or DVD case, meaning you and only you can scuff it up yourself.

IMG_20150102_094208Part of me hates waste.  The other part (the OCD part) really enjoys ripping the shrink wrap off a brand new CD and knowing that its appearance is perfect inside.  Only I can mark it up, now.  Same goes with toys, appliances, tools…we all want everything to be brand-spanking-new when we open them, when possible.  We want to be the ones to rip the protective plastic film off that new TV.  We want to be the ones who carefully remove our new laptops from the layers of packaging protecting them.

This seems to be especially important when giving gifts.  When you’re giving something to a loved one, you want everything about it to be perfect as possible, from the box to the product, right?  In cases like this, we tend to look at the layers of wasteful packaging as a necessary evil.  You probably recycle and re-use as much as possible, but we all throw a whole lot of packaging straight into the garbage bin whenever we open something new.

IMG_20150102_094112I’ll give you an example from the Record Store days, just how some people value packaging over waste when gift giving.  We used to offer a shrink wrap service.  I don’t remember what we charged.  If you wanted to buy a used CD and shrink wrap it in order to hide the fact that you were buying a used CD, we’d do it for 25 cents or 75 cents or something.  It might shock you how many times I heard variations of the question, “This is a gift.  Can you shrink wrap it for me?”

“Is there a way to put plastic on this so he doesn’t know it’s a used CD?”

“I don’t want her to know this is used.  Do you have a shrink wrapping machine or something like that?”

And so on and so forth.  There was a demand (clearly) so we offered it.

I found a better use for the shrink wrap machine.  When I happened upon a rare digipack version of a CD, or something with fragile packaging, I would reseal it, to protect it.  You’d be amazed how much you can wreck a CD case just from normal shelf wear.  If it’s something which has value in its packaging, then you want to prevent that.  I had (and later sold at a profit) a rare copy of The Black Crowes’ Amorica album.  This had the “x-rated” cover on a good condition digipack.  To prevent it from getting scuffed or damaged and losing value, I resealed it.   When I later got the Sho’ Nuff box set, I sold it for like $20.

IMG_20150102_093955You know those burgundy and yellow jewel cases that came with Kiss’ You Wanted the Best, You Got the Best CD?  Another prime candidate for resealing (though you will still have to be careful you don’t crack the plastic)!

Some of my co-workers were known to reseal their hands.  I do not know why.  I did not partake in that ritual.

My quandary can be summed up as this:  I like packaging to a certain degree.  I hate the waste aspect of it, and the environmental impact.  In my own life I try to reduce waste as much as possible.  But I can’t get around my preference to tear open the shrink wrap on a brand new virgin CD and be the first to touch it with bare hands.

What is the compromise?  I don’t know.

I don’t think there is a compromise.  I don’t think wasteful packaging is a sustainable practice.  I think, sooner or later, we all are going to have to get used to shedding layers of waste in our future.

MOVIE REVIEW: “Weird Al” Yankovic- UHF (1989)

“Hey!  These floors are dirty as hell, and I’m not gonna take it anymore!” – Stanley Spadowski

UHF_0001“Weird Al” Yankovic – UHF (1989 MGM, 2002 DVD)

I never understood why this brilliant, family friendly and absurd comedy wasn’t a hit.  Weird Al never made another movie, such was the box office failure.  UHF was simply ahead of its time.  Today, viewers familiar with the Family Guy and modern comedy will “get” the tangents and bizarre fantasy sequences.  Also, it’s important to remember that this great cast was barely known at the time.  Michael Richards was pre-Seinfeld.  Fran Drescher had yet to become the Nanny.  David Proval was years away from playing Tony Soprano’s nemesis in season two.  The only one I’d heard of in 1989 was Billy Barty!

George Newman (Yankovic) is an unemployed dreamer who lands a crummy job managing a UHF TV station on the verge of bankruptcy and permanent closure.  He just can’t focus, constantly losing himself in rich, heroic dreamscapes.  Weird Al as Indiana Jones…Weird Al as Rambo…Weird Al as Mark Knopfler…Can he use his imagination to help the TV station survive?  If he doesn’t, his girlfriend Terri (Victoria Jackson) isn’t likely to stick around for long.  Fortunately George’s best friend Bob (David Bowe) is there to help.

The station, U-62, comes with its own assortment of personalities. Pamela (Drescher) is the hard working receptionist dying to make the move to on-camera.  Noodles McIntosh (Billy Barty) is a 3’9″ camera man!  And then there’s Filo, the “chief engineer” who actually lives at the station.  (He’s currently working on his interocitor, a reference from the 1955 science fiction classic This Island Earth.  If you’ve seen This Island Earth, remember that reference next time you watch UHF.  Get it?)

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Unfortunately for George Newman, Channel 8 across town doesn’t want U-62 to succeed. RJ Fletcher (Kevin McCarthy) wants to buy it and turn it into a parking lot.  Fletcher, a prick, also cruelly fires his best janitor Stanley Spadowski (Michael Richards) over a misunderstanding.  Newman hires Stanley, and even buys him a new mop.  His old one, which Fletcher’s goons confiscated, was a birthday gift from his mom.

Newman introduces some new shows to U-62 (Wheel of Fish, Raul’s Wild Kingdom, Secrets of the Universe, Uncle Nutzy’s Clubhouse), but nothing really takes off until Stanley is given his own show, Stanley Spadowski’s Clubhouse.  His crazy personality endears him to all ages and his show becomes the hottest in town.  RJ Fletcher, however, doesn’t intend to let the station’s success continue.  Can George and his friends raise enough money to save the station?

UHF is very special for a few reasons.  One is that Weird Al does parody better than anyone.  The parodies of Geraldo, Rambo, Ghandi, Conan the Barbarian, and more are still being quoted by fans today.  Then there’s Michael Richards.  The great thing about Michael Richards, says Al, is that you can just “turn him on and tell him to go crazy for two minutes”, and that seems to be how most of the Stanley Spadowski scenes seem to work.  And it’s brilliant.  Kids who saw this movie in the 80’s loved Stanley.  He’s not only an innocent soul who loves cleanliness, but he’s absolutely whacky, hilarious, lovable and loyal.  Third, the movie has a good heart.  It celebrates imagination, uniqueness and loyalty, qualities that we all value. And of course it also has those random, rapidly changing sketch comedy bits, not too different from Monty Python and SCTV in style.  It’s actually intelligent comedy.

The audio commentary on this DVD is great  — even Michael Richards stops by to chat.  The deleted scenes are a stream of cut bits, but Weird Al’s intro and commentary makes it hilarious.  They  weren’t in the movie because they suck, says Al!  But if they didn’t put them on the DVD, we’d all be whining that they didn’t include any deleted scenes.  He has a point!   Some characters and shows (such as “Those Darn Homos”, which seems to be about two men who chase each other around a room trying to spank each other with spatulas) were cut completely from the film, so this is the only place you’d see them.  As is usually the case, the movie is better for the cuts made.  Additionally there is a short behind the scenes doc, explaining the origin of “Wheel of Fish” and more.  Al and the cast aren’t serious in the interviews, which are hilarious:

Q:  “Why do they call you Weird Al?”

A: “I don’t know, I guess people are basically cruel.  I don’t know why they call me Al.”

There’s a huge photo gallery, standard fare for a DVD, and they’re fun but non-essential. The music video for “UHF” is present (the first time he shaved off his moustache, to play Axl Rose!), an indispensable companion piece.  Even the menus are awesome, with Al himself popping up and acting silly. My only real beef about the DVD is this:  It’s one of those double sided discs with widescreen on one side and full screen on the other.  But the deleted scenes are only on the full screen side, so you have to eject and flip the disc just to watch them, because nobody watches full screen anymore.

Do you wanna drink from the fire hose?  Then get UHF.  It’s out on Blu-ray, too.

4.5/5 stars

EPIC GALLERY: 6″ Star Wars Black Series collection #3 of 3

A series of vignettes featuring my open collection of 6″ Star Wars Black Series! I wanted to show each figure’s features in detail. These are really fun to play with, and display incredibly well. Were you born in the 70’s? Then enjoy these and play along.

For gallery #1, click here.

For gallery #2, click here.

 

EPIC GALLERY: 6″ Star Wars Black Series collection #2 of 3

A series of vignettes featuring my open collection of 6″ Star Wars Black Series! I wanted to show each figure’s features in detail. These are really fun to play with, and display incredibly well. Were you born in the 70’s? Then enjoy these and play along.

For gallery #1, click here.

EPIC GALLERY: 6″ Star Wars Black Series collection #1 of 3

A series of vignettes featuring my open (and one sealed) collection of 6″ Star Wars Black Series!  I wanted to show each figure’s features in detail.  These are really fun to play with, and display incredibly well.  Were you born in the 70’s?  Then enjoy these and play along.

This series is dedicated to the memory of George Balasz 1969(?)-2014.

 

 

 

REVIEW: Deep Purple – Live in Graz 1975 (2014)

NEW-ish RELEASE

DEEP PURPLE – Live in Graz 1975 (2014 Edel)

Any time there is an official Deep Purple archival release coming out, diehards have to pay attention.  The current library of vintage live CDs is the Official Deep Purple (Overseas) Live Series.  A mouthful.  Live in Paris was the first in the series, followed by Copenhagen 1972 (which I missed but have to catch up on).  Graz 1975 is the third, and it has a long history of incomplete releases going all the way back to 1976!  Some songs were used on the single LP Made in Europe in that year.   In 1996, five songs were remixed and included on Mk III: The Final Concerts.  Now the entire April 3 show in Graz, Austria has been remixed again and released in its completion.

As a guy who owns virtually every single official Deep Purple release and catching up on the rest, I’m amazed at how crisp and fucking essential this new mix of “Burn” is.  The liner notes call it “surely the best version of this song, ever.” Paice and Blackmore both play with an excitement and energy that is even above their standards.  Lord too, but my God are Ian and Ritchie fueled up, laying down fill after fill that were of that moment.  Ritchie was on the verge of leaving — he was gone after only two more shows.  Even if you’ve heard this exact same recording of “Burn” from Mk III: The Final Concerts before, you haven’t heard it like this.  This new mix kills the prior ones, rendering them almost obsolete.  Ditto with “Stormbringer”, which captures all the energy that that was missing from Made in Europe.

I’m always pleased to hear “The Gypsy” from Stormbringer, an underrated track from an underrated album.  Glenn Hughes’ young pipes are achingly powerful, drowning out David Coverdale.  An unreleased “Lady Double Dealer” is the last short song before the show progresses on to long 10 minute or more jams.  Ritchie’s manic pick scrapes are deliciously perfect.  This usually isn’t one of my go-to Deep Purple songs, but this absolutely smokes any version I’ve heard before.

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The first long bomber is Ritchie’s blues centerpiece, “Mistreated”.  I confess I usually snooze through this one.  This version will be familiar as one of the “bonus tracks” on Mk III: The Final Concerts.  Ritchie is the main focus of “Mistreated”, and he stretches out far and wide, using bits from “Lazy”, “Sail Away” and classical melodies.  Coverdale is much stronger vocally than he tends to be on this song.  A ramshackle “Smoke on the Water” is also dull by comparison with the first part of the set.  Its highlight is a long, building and breaking Jon Lord organ solo, which leads into “With a Little Help from my Friends”.  “You Fool No One” is over 10 minutes, and it gives Ian Paice a chance to strut his stuff.  Paice is one of those drummers that it pays off to focus on and really listen to, because he is always doing something interesting.  All of this is outshined by a 20 minute “Space Truckin'”. Richard Strauss’ “Thus Spake Zarathustra” is a suitably bombastic segue, for a band of Deep Purple’s stature.  They also detour into “Child in Time”.  If you’re not wiped out by now, you will be by the end.

Gotta say that those responsible do a great job with these Deep Purple products. Absolutely no qualms about this release at all.  Not essential to anyone but fans of Deep Purple Mk III.

3.5/5 stars

#353: Hotter Than Hell

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RECORD STORE TALES MkII: Getting More Tale
#353: Hotter Than Hell

Grade 8 was a shitty year. I couldn’t wait to get the hell out of that shitty school.  I had it up to here [holds hand right below chin] with the bullies and teachers.  I had a fight with a bully at the beginning of the year, which at least kept that one off my case for the rest of it.  That was also the year I got mono!  The only thing that really helped get me through was rock and roll, and especially Kiss.  Way back in Part 3 of Record Store Tales, I acquired Hotter Than Hell on LP, in very bad condition.  I almost immediately traded it away for a bunch of other records and swag, but not before dubbing a copy on a terrible Scotch blank tape.  As explained in great detail  in Part 3, I grew to love Hotter Than Hell despite its flaws.  Sonically, it was arguably Kiss’ worst album.  I was listening to a scratched LP via a 120 minute Scotch tape that was prone to stretch and warble.  I had Kiss’ worst sounding album on the worst sounding format!  Yet something about it kept drawing me back.

Sound issues aside, there’s no denying Hotter Than Hell is a powerful record.  Perennial Kiss klassics such as “Got to Choose”, “Hotter Than Hell”, “Parasite”, and “Let Me Go, Rock and Roll” can be found right here.  It also has one of Peter Criss’ best tunes (albeit written by Paul Stanley) called “Mainline”.  I found myself immediately hooked on Peter’s raspy voice.  I surmised that “Mainline” wasn’t a hit, since it neither appeared on Alive! nor Double Platinum.  I couldn’t figure out why.  “If Kiss have songs this good that never became hits,” I reasoned, “the rest of their albums must also be pretty good.”

Right after “Mainline” was another amazing song that I fell for: “Coming Home”.  This Stanley ode to the road was chosen many years later as the opening track for Kiss’ MTV Unplugged.  Back then, to me it was another classic that should have been a hit.  The nucleus of the album became four key songs that I could not get enough of:  “Coming Home”, “Mainline”, “Hotter Than Hell” and “Got to Choose”.  Later on, “All the Way” expanded that list to five.

Those tunes kept me going.  If I was having a rotten day at school, I could hum “Coming Home” to myself and feel better.  For a French assignment, we had to record an introductory paragraph about ourselves, approximately 30-60 seconds long.  We were allowed to do this with music in the background.  I chose the opening riff to “Got to Choose” for mine. First chord — then, “Je m’appelle Michèle…” I talked for the instrumental part, and was finished before the opening line of the song. But I kept the tape running for a moment longer before I did a fade-out: “Baby, you know I heard the neighbors say…” Just so I could work a little bit of Kiss into my French class. I was probably the only one who noticed.

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The bullies picked on me pretty hard in grade 8.  I was assigned “flag duty”, which meant I was the guy who had to put the flag up every morning.  Drawing attention to myself was never a fun thing in grade 8, and I had to do it every morning.  Walking down the hall to the coughs of “Fag Boy” — a clever name derived from “Flag Boy” — was a daily torment.  They also liked to make fun of my boots, which today would have been cooler than hell, since they were vintage, but then just added to misery.  Thursdays were wood shop class, which meant a bus ride to another school downtown.  That bus ride was without a doubt the worst part of each week.  I was prone to getting sick on Thursdays, for some reason….

When I got mono (for real) I missed most of the end of grade 8, but not before being shamed in front of the entire class by my teacher.  “Shame on you!” she said, because I picked the wrong school.  We all had to choose which highschool we wanted to go to.  We were usually expected to choose the Catholic school, but there was no way in hell I was doing that.  You couldn’t have dragged me along with those kids, believe me.  There was just no way.   I chose Grand River Collegiate, which was closer.  Plus my best friend Bob, who was two years older than me, went to that school.  It would be cool to see him every day at lunch time.  We never had any classes together for obvious reasons, but we conspired to get lockers side by side once.  We had a great time in highschool.  Those were the golden years!

Certainly better than grade 8.  I’ve never told all of these stories publicly before.  It is what it is, and all is certainly forgiven now.  The interesting thing is how these experiences collided to really galvanize my love of that Hotter Than Hell album.  Listening to it today still brings back memories of gym class, waiting for it to finally end, humming “Coming Home” to myself.  And that, friends, is why such a terrible sounding record is so important to me!

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WTF Search Terms: Fan Favourites – First Grade Math edition

Everybody seems to have their favourite kind of content.  My buddy Thussy comes here mostly for the WTFs!  Every once in a while, I’ll send him a list of all the weird and wacky search terms that have (somehow) lead people to mikeladano.com.  As he did in WTF Search Terms XV, he’s picked his favourites.  Please welcome back Thussy for this Guest Shot edition of WTF Search Terms.

WTF Search Terms XXIV: Fan Favourites – First Grade Math edition

It’s been a year since my last installment of WTF search terms so here it is: My list of fucked up shit people want to see on the internet and then somehow make it to Lebrains blog. And when I say shit it sometimes literally means shit.

10. share this click to email this to a friend
I had to include this one because how the hell does this get you to a blog about music?

9. i don’t exist
Then don’t google yourself.

8. wild party
I am a wild party.

7. shower poop guy
Why do people keep searching this?

6. swedish made penis
This sort of thing aint my bag baby.

5. first grade math
Is this the answer to the question, “what did Lebrain fail in school?”

4. orangie took like 6 shooters and some bong tokes
Excellent season, the Boys still have it.

3. porn mcgangbang
It is definitely food porn.

2. Japanporn
If this is anything like Japanese imports they are way too expensive.

1. selling piss julian
“Meth?!?! He’s selling piss, you fucking dumb dumb.”

PISS

REVIEW: Motley Crue – Saints of Los Angeles (Japanese version)

MOTLEY CRUE – Saints of Los Angeles (2008 Motley Records, Japan)

Man, if there was one band due for a comeback, it was the Crue. I mean, seriously! They went from the top of their game in 1991, coming off of Feelgood and Decade, only to have their lead singer abruptly leave. Then of course the awesome new album with the new singer flopped, because he wasn’t the old singer.  Vince came back, Tommy left, and the band released the mediocre New Tattoo.  After a hiatus, Tommy Lee returned again for a big successful reunion tour, and the Crue finally managed to put out an album.  Saints of Los Angeles was better than expected, and did hearken back to the good old days.

You hear that a lot; “hearkens back to the old days”. Aside from the overly glossy production, this album sounds like the natural followup to Dr. Feelgood and “Primal Scream”. Of course, it was contrived that way. Nikki talks about this being a concept album following the the storyline of their book The Dirt, but really that is just an excuse to revisit the old (successful) Motley sound.  Sure, why not?  I’ll buy that.

CRUE SAINTS_0005Despite all odds, this album does succeed. From the opener “LA.M.F.” (which is an obvious homage to “In The Beginning” from the Shout album and “T.N.T.” from Feelgood) to the final track “Going Out Swinging”, there’s hardly any filler here. Just about every song kicks. No ballads, unless you want to count “The Animal In Me” (which I don’t). Hey, and think of it: Sharp fans will recall that Feelgood itself was originally conceived as a concept album with no ballads. Interesting.*

Guitar riffs are kicking, Vince is singing as good as you could hope, and all the songs shine. There’s even the odd female backing vocal, recalling the Nasty Habits. Only the production drags this down to a lower level, I simply find it too processed and glossy. Bob Rock would have added more thud, but that’s just my opinion. Song wise, winners include the title track and first single. Other highlights are the glam “Down At The Whiskey”, “Face Down In The Dirt” (see, The Dirt is in the title!),  the swaggering “What’s It Gonna Take”, and the chugging “Just Another Psycho”.  Those would be my favourites on an album of consistent song quality.  All but “Welcome To The Machine”, which sounds like a transparent ripoff of Ace Frehley’s “Shot Full Of Rock”. I can’t believe I seem to be the only one pointing this out.

I was disappointed by one thing: look at those writing credits. Mick Mars has just one co-write, ditto Tommy Lee. Vince Neil: No writing credits at all. Instead, the album was mostly written by Nikki and his Sixx AM cohorts James Michael and DJ Ashba along with hired songsmith Marti Frederiksen. So, is this a Crue album or another Nikki Sixx solo album featuring Motley Crue? You decide. It sounds like Motley, but c’mon. Both Mick and Tommy were cornerstones of this band’s songwriting. It feels like Nikki just got his buds to write like Mick and Tommy.

CRUE SAINTS_0006There’s one item I’d still like to get, related to this album.  I want to track down the CD single for “Saints of Los Angeles”, which lacks the CrueFest nobodies’ “gang vocal”. Maybe it’s just me, but I don’t think that a bunch of nobodies from Trapt or Papa Roach need to be on a Crue album.  So I’d like to hear that one.

Other than these minor complaints, Saints wins. When you’re listening you’ll forget who wrote the songs, and you’ll just dig the fact that Tommy is back on drums and Mick is playing better than ever.  God bless Mick Mars — that man is a rock and roll machine.  He is the MVP on Saints of Los Angeles.

OH!  And the Japanese bonus tracks, let’s not forget those.  The liner notes tell us nothing about where or when they were recorded, but they are obviously more recent.  “Kickstart My Heart” is the first, and Vince Neil sings with that annoying habit of singing every other word.  He lets the audience take lines when he can’t.  “Saints” slams, though.

4/5 stars. Crue fans will love it.

*It’s true.  According to a 1989 Hit Parader interview, not only were the band considering a concept album, but Nikki Sixx stated that he wanted Feelgood to be all hard rock, no ballads.  The ballads they had collected such as “Rodeo” and the newer “Without You” were to be included on a second new album to be released in 1990 called Motley Crue: The Ballads.  Bob Rock reportedly talked them out of the “no ballads” concept.  Then the concept was recycled for what would become Motley Crue (1994).  Before Vince bailed/was fired, Nikki said there were to be no ballads on the next Crue album.

#352: “It’s All Helix’ Fault!” – The Story Of My Tooth

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RECORD STORE TALES MkII: Getting More Tale
#352: “It’s All Helix’ Fault!” — The Story Of My Tooth

I know I’m not alone, among men who once had an intense fear of the dentist.  As soon as I was old enough to refuse to go, I stopped going.  (Prior to that, I simply hid the reminder cards that periodically arrived in the mail!)  I’m not saying that was a smart thing.  It wasn’t.  I’m over that fear now, but as these old journals reveal, that phobia later came back to bite me in the ass…with a weird connection to the rock band Helix.

Date: 2006/11/25 17:28
Title: The Big Update: “It’s All Helix’ Fault! — The Story Of My Tooth”

So just to get up to speed:

Until today, I haven’t seen a dentist since 1989. I have an intense fear of doctors and dentists. That has kept me away, until now.

This morning Jen and I headed out to United Rentals to drop off a CD I burned for one of the ladies there (Bon Jovi hits & B-sides). From there we went to the grocery and candy stores to mow down on a feast of goodies. And that is where this story truly begins.

I was chewing on some Laffy Taffy, and it was terrific. After I was done, however, I felt a throbbing in my upper left jaw. It was my troublesome wisdom tooth. It’s been causing me mild to medium pain for a little while. Normally, I’d just kill it with Advil and it’s fine. I knew the tooth was impacting on the other teeth, because when it was sore, they were all sore. Being the stubborn person I am, I just popped Advil. I knew it would have to come out one day. I kept putting it off because of that phobia.

Lately the tooth hadn’t even been bothering me. I think I’ve had one toothache in the last month. All seemed well for the forseeable future.

I should have known there would be an imminent problem when Jen presented me with our Helix tickets for next Friday. You see, last time we saw Helix, she had to have an emergency tooth extraction just before. She was still in pain by the day of the concert. It really hampered her enjoyment of the show, but she still gave them an R.

So here she’s presenting me with the Helix tickets. The very next day I’m in agony with a fractured wisdom tooth! I don’t blame the Laffy Taffy, I have only myself and Helix to blame!

I sat here in agony for a short time this morning. When I say “agony” I am not kidding. Those of you who’ve had this problem know what I’m talking about. The entire left side of my face was paralysed with pain. The upper and lower jaw were throbbing, and there was a stabbing from the wisdom tooth. Jen started calling dentists that are open weekends.

After probably an hour of calling around, she found a doctor that did extractions on Saturdays, but was booked solid. That doctor referred her to the hospital, who referred her to a guy named Dr. A. Jones. Dr. Jones had no bookings today. My dad drove us down because I couldn’t even see straight.

The whole way there I was freaking out, because I couldn’t even remember what a dentists office looked like.  But we got in, and it wasn’t so bad. The doctor was good, he pumped me full of painkillers, and pulled that dirty cocksucker out of my mouth. I’m here now and the painkillers are only starting to wear off. I’m going to pop a T3 soon. I’m about to try to eat. Life is good once again.

I forgive you, Helix!