You guys know the drill. Here are 10(+) weird search terms that led people here. Let’s give’r.
1. dio stripper music
In answer to 1, I think Rainbow in the Dark would be a great stripper song. Do you know the answer to #2?
2. what does 333 mean to David lee Roth
I asked Craig Fee for more info on this one. “No clue on 333. Number of people that actually think Sammy is better?”
3. is ace frehley japanesr
No.
4. a) trailer park boys officer high cockb) officer high cock c) chickenjacked d) i’m mowing the air randy episode
So many Trailer Park Boys search terms this month, and new ones too, such as “officier high cock” from the new season. What people expected to find when they google “officer high cock” is another question altogether.
5.why is skid row subhuman race so expensive
Perhaps you are looking at a Japanese import. They are very expensive. :)
6.11994
No idea how this led somebody to me.
7.hotpiss
On the other hand, I do know how this one led to me.
Everybody seems to have their favourite kind of content. My buddy Thussy comes here mostly for the WTFs! Every once in a while, I’ll send him a list of all the weird and wacky search terms that have (somehow) lead people to mikeladano.com. As he did inWTF Search Terms XV, he’s picked his favourites. Please welcome back Thussy for this Guest Shot edition of WTF Search Terms.
WTF Search Terms XXIV: Fan Favourites – First Grade Math edition
It’s been a year since my last installment of WTF search terms so here it is: My list of fucked up shit people want to see on the internet and then somehow make it to Lebrains blog. And when I say shit it sometimes literally means shit.
10. share this click to email this to a friend
I had to include this one because how the hell does this get you to a blog about music?
9. i don’t exist
Then don’t google yourself.
8. wild party
I am a wild party.
7. shower poop guy
Why do people keep searching this?
6. swedish made penis
This sort of thing aint my bag baby.
5. first grade math
Is this the answer to the question, “what did Lebrain fail in school?”
4. orangie took like 6 shooters and some bong tokes
Excellent season, the Boys still have it.
3. porn mcgangbang
It is definitely food porn.
2. Japanporn
If this is anything like Japanese imports they are way too expensive.
Here’s the same boring blah blah that everybody is posting — site stats! The best part of site stats are the Top Commenters of 2014, so I’ve saved them for last. There are also the Top Search Terms of 2014, which hold a few real WTFs…
The busiest day of 2014 at mikeladano.com was July 16th with 1,490 views. The most popular post that day was GUEST CONCERT REVIEW: Queen + Adam Lambert 7/13/2014 (by Boppin).
In 2014, there were 430 new posts, growing the total archive of this blog to 1,344 posts.
Regardless, all five readers have excellent sites that have supported me, and I support in turn. I recommend that you check each one of them out. Aaron and James at keepsmealive write mostly about music, and music related anecdotes. Their site goes back to 2007 and there is plenty of content there. Scott, our Heavy Metal OverloRd, always has something interesting to check out in his Buying Round-Ups and reviews. If you like music, books, video games and coffee (who doesn’t), then you need to check out Sarca at Caught Me Gaming. She is also the founder of the #cupfacecrew. If you like quirky music reviews with Lego re-enactments, then the fine 1537 is the site for you. Joe’s photography is just as interesting as his writing. Then for everything in the Swedish and world hard rock scenes, Jon Wilmenius runs e-tainment news and reviews. I swear to God, I had no idea Sweden had so many rock bands! His annual Sweden Rock Festival reviews are always a treat.
Happy New Year to you, and keep on rockin’ in the free world!
You don’t have to like Sebastian Bach (the person) to like Angel Down. He may be a bit of a blow-hard, but damn, he made another great album. By my counting this is his third legitimately great album (Slave to the Grind and Subhuman Race being the other two.)
Baz’s voice is still powerful, and he still has most of his range. In fact, after the disappointing Bring ‘Em Bach Alive I thought it was all over for the voice. Not so! Angel Down proves it. Bach’s still got the goods. He’s got more character in his voice than he did when he was 19 or 20. More grit. But his lungs are as powerful as ever, absolutely mind-bogglingly so.
This was (by far) the heaviest album that Baz had made to date. This is way heavier than anything Skid Row has done with or without him. Bach’s working with great people on this, including Roy Z and members of the old Halford band. It doesn’t get much more metal than this. It’s heavier than most Priest albums, and the songs are all strong. They won’t sink into your skull on first listen, or even the third. It’s a challenging listen, the pummeling of guitars and drums are constant and brutal. Having said that, eventually the melodies, riffs, and Bach’s vocals will worm their way into your brain like a virus.
Highlights for this listener included:
“(Love Is) A Bitchslap”, which you may have heard in preview form on season 7 of Trailer Park Boys. This smoker is a duet with Baz’s buddy W. Axl Rose! You can literally smell the rubber burning.
“Back In The Saddle”, the powerful Aero-cover, and another duet with the reclusive Axl Rose. To hear Axl and Baz singing together again is awesome; two rock gods shattering the glass and gargling with it after.
“You Don’t Understand” with its patented Roy Z guitar riff (which really is just a patented Maiden riff).
“Falling Into You”, a Skid-Row-esque ballad along the lines of “Wasted Time” with some gorgeous strings (synth?) and guitar harmonies. Another standout ballad is “By Your Side”, along similar lines.
The brutally heavy “American Metalhead”. Ignore the fact that Baz lived most his childhood in Canada and considers himself Canadian. I can appreciate that singing “Canadian Metalhead” wouldn’t have the same impact to his core (American) record buyers. Either way, it’s a brutal assault of the ears, as Baz screams his way out of your headphones.
“Angel Down”, the title track, which starts atmospheric like a Sabbath opener before hitting that pummeling Pantera riff; Baz ripping the vocal cords again.
14 songs, and that’s just a handful of favourites listed above. There are lots of great moments on this CD. I can’t praise it enough, songwriting and performance wise. It really surprised me. I didn’t expect something this solid. Top it off with another of his dad’s paintings on the cover, and this was the comeback album that fans were hoping for but never expecting.
Thank Santa’s tits! It was with tremendous joy that I watched the long-awaited Season 8 from the Trailer Park Boys this past weekend. I watched five episodes on Saturday night, and five more Sunday morning. Then on Monday, I re-watched my favourite episode, “Orangie’s Pretty Fuckin’ Tough”. As a long time fan, to say that I am pleased is an understatement. I am thrilled. Knowing in advance that a couple characters weren’t coming back (Ray and Trevor are no longer on the show), everything I wanted out of the show was there. There are even a couple new characters, who look like they may be important in the already finished Season 9.
As if there was no pause at all, Season 8 feels like classic Trailer Park Boys, immediately. Some new characters are introduced, such as Don, who joins Randy as the new Assistant Supervisor. “Officer Highcock”, another new face, is no George Green. He’s smart. But fear not, George Green is back too, although Lahey is approaching retirement.
Trinity is tending bar at Julian’s new in-park club/gym, “The Dirty Dancer”. Bubbles is building his “Shed & Breakfast” for humans and cats. Julian and Ricky have numerous schemes on the go. Ricky’s growing dope at a mad rate, and refining it into honey oil, by special order of Sebastian Bach. He’s also realized that he can use hash as currency almost anywhere: on the bus, at the hardware store, or the dentist’s office. Seems just about everybody accepts Ricky’s $2 hash coins!
There’s also plenty of shady horsecockery. Cyrus and Sam Losco are working together again, and they want to buy the park and bulldoze it to the ground. The only solution is for Julian and Barb Lahey to work together to keep it. Needing capital, Julian sets into motion businesses and schemes galore. Steve Rogers returns for a hell of a bachelor party at Julian’s bar, attracting the attention of the cops.
Ricky’s life is complicated by some unexpected news. The only thing holding him together is Orangie. My buddy Chris and I agree on this: the best element of Season 8 has to be Ricky’s goldfish, Orangie. Ricky loves to party with him, and takes him everywhere in a bowl with ORANGIE scrawled on it in magic marker. Ricky’s car now has a sun roof (of sorts), which functions as Orangie’s swimming pool after it rains. Ricky wakes one morning to find Orangie unresponsive: “Orangie, you finally passed out in the pool, did you buddy?” When Bubbles asks what happened, Ricky explains: “We got fucked up on hash tokes and shooters. Orangie’s pretty fucking tough. Woke up this morning with my fucking pants down and my hands on my cock, thanks to Orangie.” Now it’s up to Bubbles to replace Orangie before Ricky realizes the fish is dead. As if minding a goldfish isn’t enough, Ricky also decides to turn his trailer into a hockey rink.
Bubbles’ doesn’t have it easy either. Due to a complex series of events regarding Steve Rogers, hookers, crabs, and Bubbles’ shed(s), he goes nucking futs at a drug store and is sentenced to community service. Where Ricky has Orangie for support, Bubbles turns to his new puppets…Bobby Turkelino, and little Ricky! And you know what happens when you mix Bubbles and puppets.
The story arc in this season was hilarious, with only one dud in the bunch (I’ll let you figure out which). Some story points hint at what may be coming in Season 9, and that has me anticipating more hilarity. Hopefully, Orangie will make an appearance in Season 9. With a few more trips to the pet store, Bubbles should be able to make that happen. Trailer Park Boys is off to a hell of a new start, and with the progress made in Season 8, I see no need to stop.
4.5/5 stars
Review by LeBrain with contributions from Chris Thuss.
TRAILER PARK BOYS – Live in F**kin’ Dublin (2014 Netflix)
Some things never change!
Some time before the events of Don’t Legalize It, our boys Ricky and Julian had to help Bubbles make a music video, to win a chance to go to Ireland with Rush. Bubbles, dressed as Alex Lifeson, chose a shot-for-shot remake of the “Closer to the Heart” video. Ricky, wearing a false nose, is Geddy Lee (Ricky thinks it’s “Freddy Lee”). Julian taped a piece of chicken skin to his chin to get the look of Neil Peart’s Fu Manchu ‘stache. Drumming one-handed with a glass full of rum and coke in the other hand isn’t easy, but Julian pulls it off. The video wins the contest! Alex calls Bubbles personally and the three are soon on a private jet bound to Ireland (“Ironland” according to Ricky), with Randy tagging along.
Unfortunately for Ricky, a private plane isn’t a free license to bring your own dope into Ireland. The judge, however, is sympathetic. Since the boys are so popular in Ireland, he will drop the jail sentence if the boys will perform a show for community service, about the dangers of drink and drugs. The boys agree to a show in Dublin (“Doobylin”), and the live portion of the program begins.
The Trailer Park Boys live on stage in this case consisted of a puppet show, some audience participation contests, a couple of live songs (including Bubbles’ hit “Liquor and Whores”) and a lot of fuckery. If you have seen the boys live, then you know their show is basically just organized chaos. Audience members are invited on stage (the two dumbest ones, apparently) to play Cory and Trevor for the evening.
Highlights included the appearances of the Green Bastard (from “Parts Unknown”) and the evil puppet known as Conky. Apparently Conky must have survived being drowned in the episode “A Shit River Runs Through It”. I also enjoyed Ricky’s trick of “hippotizing” the crowd. He learned how to do it by watching Reveen, and wears a Reveen-esque magician cloak for it.
The film ends with the boys returning to Canada, having missed the Rush concert. As a bonus, you do get to see their Rush video in its entirety, side by side with the original. A nice addition, as this video is the highlight of the film.
TRAILER PARK BOYS – Don’t Legalize It(2014 Entertainment One)
Directed by Mike Clattenburg
Two years prior to the start of the new Trailer Park Boys opus, Ricky and Julian were released from jail for the 17th time. Jim Lahey has suffered from a Ricky-induced stroke. He now limps with a cane, hooked on coke (“white liquor”), still beside an increasingly disgusted Randy. Lucy is living with mall cop George Green (aka “Fucky McFucksnapper”). Ricky and Julian have ceased working with each other. Ricky’s growing dope on an unprecedented scale, in a house in the subdivisions, but the Shitmobile only drives in reverse. Bubbles is delivering chicken and beer on bicycle, living under J-Roc’s front step. Terry & Dennis (the Flappy Bird Brothers) and Sam Losco are working for Cyrus. And Lahey’s buying coke from Sam. It’s a viscous circle. Julian was bouncing at a local club, but now has taken a step up (?) in the world by selling piss.
Let me repeat that: Julian is selling piss.
Clean piss, stolen from the military, at $60 a vial. Paying $60 to pass a drug test and keep your job is apparently worth it in Julian’s world. “Liquid gold,” he calls it. The quality and freshness of the piss is important to his customers. Ricky’s business of choice, however, is about to be shut down. Canada is legalizing marijuana, turning Ricky from king of the hill to unemployed overnight…unless he can stop legalization.
Allow me to repeat that too: Ricky needs to stop the legalization of marijuana.
Bubbles then receives a mysterious letter from a lawyer: his long-lost parents have passed away, but have left Bubbles a piece of land in Kingston, Ontario. All he has to do is claim it. Since Ricky needs to get to Ottawa to stop legalization, and Julian needs to get to Montreal to sell his stolen piss, it only makes sense to combine road trips. Or a “working vacation,” says Julian. He’s turned the Dirty Burger into a “Piss Wagon” to transport the liquid gold. And Lahey’s following them.
Will things go off the rails when Randy dumps all Lahey’s “white liquor” out of the window of their station wagon? Can Julian trust Cyrus? Will Bubbles stay in Kingston? And can Ricky stop his precious illegal crop from being legalized and taxed by government dicks? All will be decided by the time they get to Ottawa…
Trailer Park Boys shows are known for the mangled English known as Rickysisms. Some of my favourite lines and Rickyisms in this installment included:
“Instant carla, fucky!” – Ricky.
“Just shutty that fucky! What’s with your hair man, you think you’re a fucking Beavil or something?” – to Randy regarding his “Beatles ‘do”.
(Laughs) “Meth!? He’s selling piss, you fucking dum-dum.” – Ricky to Lahey, who thought the test tubes and hazmat gear meant Julian was cooking crystal meth.
“Cocksuckers chicken-jacked me!”– Bubbles after being mugged for chicken.
“Julian, can you stop handling the weiners for a second?” – Bubbles
The movie is dedicated to Richard Collins, aka Philadelphia Collins, who passed during the filming of the movie. Phil Collins has some excellent scenes in this installment despite being confined to a wheelchair. It is also dedicated to Brian Huggins (Shitty Bill) and Rita MacNeil.
Special features: a 1976 vintage VW camper is discussed in the “Cars Of” feature. Apparently that camper was a bitch! The Laheymobile is an ’89 Crown Victoria station wagon that Randy is not allowed to fart in. Ricky’s Shitmobile is a ’75 Chrysler New Yorker, which had to be drastically revamped structurally just to make it safe to film with. Then there’s the Dirty Burger, which is actually an old camper that Robb Wells and John Paul Trembley bought years ago. “Dogs, Busses & Barf Tubes” reveals the origins of Bubbles’ bus. My favourite featurette is “The Cock Bomb Problem”. What’s the “Cock Bomb” you ask? The crew and cast ceaselessly pranked each other by drawing cocks on all of their stuff.
I felt that Trailer Park Boys went a little too dark on the last couple outings. The final TV episode before the recent revamp of the show was the dour “Say Goodnight to the Bay Guys”, which was followed by the similar downer movie Countdown to Liquor Day. Don’t Legalize It has its own moments of sadness and quite a few tears, but measured against its predecessor, it’s a much funnier and re-watchable film. I think this captures the heart of the series better than the last film, even though many characters are absent or have smaller roles. The core is the triumvirate of Ricky, Julian and Bubbles, along with the evil duo of Randy and Lahey. As long as you have those ingredients, you have potential for a lot of fuckery. Don’t Legalize It delivers.
I can only say so much about this subject, for hopefully obvious reasons. I can say this: Yes, I have had to testify in court, in a case of stolen CDs.
It was the Monday after Mother’s Day, in the year 2000. It was a long, ongoing case, a break and enter. I had forgotten all about it. I had made my written statement a year prior. The store had done nothing wrong. We did everything exactly as we had to, when dealing with a situation like this. As per the instructions of the police, we took all the correct ID from the suspect when buying the CDs, and followed all the correct procedures. When dealing with stolen goods, the police actually preferred us to buy the goods rather than send the person away. That way, they get evidence.
Unfortunately since I was the buyer this time, I was a witness and was therefore subpoenaed to testify. Two of my co-workers from other stores also had to appear in court. I was the only one who decided to wear a suit and tie for my appearance. The other two came in jeans and T-shirts.
“Mike!” laughed Cam. “What are you wearing a suit for? You look like you’re the one on trial!” I looked around. Indeed, the only people who seemed to be dressed as nicely as me were the people who were on trial and their lawyers! And I didn’t look like a lawyer.
“I thought you had to wear a suit to court,” I said in ignorance.
Without going into details, here’s what I remember:
– Cam got a parking ticket because there wasn’t any parking available.
– We spent hours waiting in a room that looked like school class room. Hungry and unable to leave, we decided to order a pizza. We pooled our cash together but didn’t have much left for a tip. I remember that the delivery guy threw the extra coins back at us.
– A year after the incident, I couldn’t remember what the guy looked like. I remember him being big, and bald. That was not enough to satisfy the court that I could recognize the accused. My testimony was all but useless.
I remember reading in the paper a short while later that the defense lawyer got his client off. It wasn’t really a surprise to me.
I only had to go to court twice, both for this one case. The experience left me with a bad taste in my mouth. The store had paid cash for the CDs we bought from this guy, but we never got compensated for them when the police took them as evidence. In my experience, we only ever got compensated once, and that was just for four CDs. Although we always cooperated with the system, and made sure we always followed procedure, we got burned too.
TRAILER PARK BOYS – “Say Goodnight to the Bad Guys” (2008 Alliance Atlantis)
“Say Goodnight to the Bad Guys”, the “final” Trailer Park Boys episode before the big movie Countdown to Liquor Day, is actually one of my least favourite episodes (right down there with “Steve French” and “Oscar Goldman”). A one hour special tacked on after Season 7, “Say Goodnight to the Bad Guys” follows Ricky, Julian and Bubbles after their big haul at the end of the last season. It took two years to finally do a DVD/Blu-ray release. To date, this is the only Trailer Park Boys episode released to Blu-ray. The movies, of course, are available on Blu.
Thought that the boys had finally made it rich, and everything was sweet? You’d certainly think so after seeing the hunky-dory last episode in Season 7. This is not the case! Turns out Julian has hidden the money, until such time as he feels it’s safe to distribute it. Ricky’s Shitmobile does have some sweet new rims, but it is now missing a tire. Old recurring nemesis Sam Losco knows about the cash, and with the help of Barb Lahey, finds out where it’s hidden. Before you can say “shit tides”, Ricky, Julian and Bubbles are broke once again, and Lahey is back on the liquor.
Another scheme is hatched, this time revolving around a Country & Western dance. Can the boys make a little cash, or will Lahey win yet again? One thing for certain: you can count on some dirty dancing, backstabbing schemes, and Philadelphia Collins eating balogna sandwiches. That I promise you.
Look for cameos by The Tragically Hip (specifically Gordon Downie and Bob Baker). Blu-ray bonus features are sparse either way, just some behind-the-scenes stuff. It does come with a cool Bubbles-as-Scarface mini poster though. That would look cool in your man-cave.
Unfortunately “Say Goodnight to the Bad Guys” did not feel like a proper episode. It felt like an afterthought. It was revealed that a full season was intended, but all those ideas were distilled down into one episode. Good thing the boys will be back on TV this fall.
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