Record Store Tales

Part 272: Priest Week – The Re-Masters

PRIEST WEEK

It’s the end of PRIEST WEEK! It was all Judas Priest all week, and what better way to end it then with a 12 CD remastered box set?
Monday:  Rocka Rolla (1974)
Tuesday: Priest…Live! (1987)

Wednesday: Metal Works 73-93 (1993)
Thursday: Demolition (2001 Japanese version)

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RECORD STORE TALES Part 272:  PRIEST WEEK – The Re-Masters

When Judas Priest began reissuing their albums in 2001 (in three waves of four CDs each), of course I had to have all 12.  I’ve been a fan of the band since I was a kid, and my complete Judas Priest collection has always brought me much joy.  Priest’s “Re-masters” series included all the studio and live albums from 1977’s Sin After Sin to 1990’s Painkiller.  Each was expanded with two bonus tracks, with the exception of the live albums.  Unleashed in the East contained the four bonus tracks from the Japanese Priest in the East release (which I already had) and Priest…Live had three extra songs.  (Today, there is a new budget box set that collects the entire Halford era into one box called The Complete Albums Collection.)

In late 2001, local record store legend Al “the King” dropped into my store to sell some discs.  Nimble-minded readers will recall that on day 1 of Priest Week, Al King sold me my vinyl copy of Rocka Rolla in 1989!  Al now worked at another store in town called Encore Records.  Al’s a good guy.  He didn’t see us so much as competition, because really we catered to different groups of people.  There were certain discs that Al couldn’t sell at Encore (pop and mainstream stuff), and he knew I would give him the fairest prices in town, so he came to me.  It was a good mutually beneficial arrangement.  I wanted his stock and he wanted the money!

On this afternoon, I chatted with Al while going through his discs, and he informed me of a forthcoming Priest collectible.

“It’s expensive,” he began, “but it does look cool.  It’s a UK import.  I sold one to this really excited guy, but Mark’s trying to order another one in.  If you want it no problem, but fair warning, it’s not cheap.”

“Tell me more!” I said to Al.

PRIEST WORKINGThe details were scant.  The box set was titled The Re-Masters, and it contained four CDs with room for the other eight, sold separately.  The CDs included with the box were the first four of the Columbia years:  Sin After Sin, Stained Class, Killing Machine (Hell Bent for Leather) and Unleashed in the East.  It was an attractive box, printed to look like it is held together by metal rivets.  There was also supposed to be a booklet included.  At the time, I was obsessed with collecting the “best” versions of anything.  This meant having all the songs, and the best packaging available.  I asked Al to hold the box for me.  At various points in the conversation, I felt like Al was trying to talk me out of buying it due to the price!  What Al didn’t understand was my deep obsession for this band.

A few days later I headed down to Encore and bought my treasure.  I eagerly opened it up and discovered one little additional bonus!  Nothing major, but cool enough for me:  the four CDs included had embossed silver logos on both front and back covers, instead of the regular printed ones.  This differentiated the discs from the versions I could buy separately at retail.  Also, Hell Bent for Leather was indeed included under the UK name Killing Machine, something I hadn’t seen on CD before. Finally, once all 12 discs were collected, together the CD spines read JUDAS PRIEST and depicted their “devil’s tuning fork” logo.  The spaces for the 8 discs sold separately were taken up by individual foam spacers.

Back covers with silver embossed “tuning fork” logo, and without.

The bonus tracks were a mixed bag of live and demo songs from all over Priest history, but some, such as “Race With the Devil” (The Gun cover) were incredible and classic.  One by one, I added to the set.  Some discs came in used rather quickly:  Point of Entry was one such disc.  Others I had to order via Amazon, or buy in-store at Encore, such as Turbo and Painkiller.  But I did get them all, and my complete Priest Re-Masters set has served me well for over a decade now.  Although I have since bought the newer deluxe editions of Screaming for Vengeance and British Steel (with bonus DVDs) I have felt no need to replace this box set with anything else.  Having to buy the discs individually and complete it myself makes it rare to find, not to mention the box was made only in small numbers.  Some fans expected more out of the box set, and some were upset that the Gull Records and Ripper Owens years are not represented inside, even though Ripper was still the current singer.  My attitude was and is, “Who cares?”  It’s a great looking set and it comprises a complete era of Priest.  I like it a lot and according to Al King I’m one of two guys in town that own it.  Cool.

Part 271: The Stamp

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RECORD STORE TALES Part 271:  The Stamp

The year:  1997.

We had just started repairing scratched CDs via a GTA-based third party contractor.  They were able to remove a miniscule layer of plastic from the playing surface, rendering a smooth surface that would not deflect your CD player’s laser.  The result was a playable, sellable CD, with a clouded appearance on the CD itself.  The cloudy look was usually very minor, although it was sometimes enough to turn a customer off of buying the CD.

After repairing the scratched discs, they would be put in brand new CD cases and then on the shelves to sell.  But we also had to mark each disc as “repaired” somehow, so that if any were returned as defective, we would know they had been fixed.  We could then get the fee for fixing the disc credited back to us, or the contractor could try to fix it again and buff it deeper.  Either way, we needed to mark them, somehow.

The best way to fix a surface scratched CD

We agreed that the least problematic way was to stamp the inner (usually blank and hidden) sleeve of the CD, the part underneath the plastic tray.  We stamped it with our store logo.  For most discs at the time, nobody would ever notice the stamp unless they pulled the case apart.  The only problems were with discs that had inner picture sleeves under clear trays.  We were forced to put the stamp directly on the artwork in those cases, a process that killed me every time.  I hated defacing a CD.  It’s not something I would ever do to my own property.

IMG_00001317Around this time, AC/DC just released the luxurious Bonfire box set, a monolith of rock containing many separate additional treats:  A pick, a bottle opener/keychain, a sticker, and a temporary tattoo.  This was high on my priority list, so I put my name in our store’s computer reservation system for the first used copy that showed up.

It was only a few weeks before a used copy did show up.  One of the higher-ups decided to work in my store that day.  A man came to the counter with some CDs to sell, and the Bonfire box set.  It was mint, complete, everything intact.  However the higher-up didn’t consider the set as “mint” as I did; she determined that one of the CDs from the Let There Be Rock set was scratched.  It had a tiny nearly invisible mark on it not even the size of a hair, but not a scratch.  She dutifully stamped the inner tray and put the CD in the pile to be sent out and fixed.

I was disappointed that the tray had been defaced, but there was no way I was letting that disc get sent out and fixed.  It would look worse, with the cloudy finish.  I preferred the un-fixed finish with that tiny hairline mark that I could barely see.  I can see the scratch even less today with my aged eyesight!

I bought the set but that stamp is still there.  I covered it up with a white sticker, and was grateful that the box set didn’t have clear CD trays with artwork underneath.

That stamp still bugs me.  I still see it there, and it still bugs me!  How do you feel about things like this?  Defects in the physical musical product that you love?  I know I can’t be alone.

Postscript:  Years later some damn rat kid stole the stamper.  On my watch!!

Part 270: Star Trek vs. Star Wars

Dedicated to David “Homer”

KIRK VADER

RECORD STORE TALES Part 270:  Star Trek vs. Star Wars

I took my fair share of ribbing for being a Star Trek fan at the record store.  I’ve been a Star Trek fan since I was a little kid – I had a kid’s size Scotty uniform shirt.  The first episode I can remember seeing was Operation: Annihilate!  It terrified and excited me at the same time, and I couldn’t believe the heroism of Mr. Spock.  He was my favourite character by far.  Kirk was always getting distracted by girls.

ART OFI witnessed some amazing moments in Trek-history during my time at the store (1994-2006).  Generations came out a few months after I started, and I remember watching a City TV Generations special on the little screen in our store one night.  It was a quiet evening in the mall and there was nothing to do but clean.  The TV was usually on Much, so I switched it to the Trek special.    That was a fun night for me.

Shortly after that, Voyager debuted and I raced home from work to catch the pilot episode which I was recording.  I missed the first 20 minutes and in the pre-PVR days you couldn’t just rewind and watch a show that you were recording “live”.  Yes, it was an exciting time to be a Trekkie.  My co-workers teased me about it, but Christmas ’95 my boss bought me a thoughtful Art of Star Trek book that I still have.  That was pretty cool of him.  He knew nothing about Trek but he picked a cool book with a Generations special in the back.  He was relieved that I liked it.

As a Trekkie (I dislike the term “Trekker”), I’ll be the first to admit that it’s a pretty hit-and-miss affair, being a fan.  For every great movie like First Contact, there was a shite movie like Nemesis.  By the late 90’s, being a Trek fan was a lot less exciting.  Especially when George Lucas started cranking up the Star Wars machine again with the Special Editions, in theaters.

The last time that I was really excited about Star Trek (before the recent reboot) was Star Trek: Insurrection. On December  11, 1998 I was working the night shift with a new guy, a class act named Dave “Homer”.   It was a Friday night, and the new guy said that he and his roommate were going to catch the new Trek movie on opening night.  Was I interested in joining them?  Of course I was.

INSURRECTIONIn addition to Dec 11 being opening night for Star Trek: Insurrection (joke name – Star Trek: Big Erection), it was also opening night for the brand new movie theater in town.  Then known as Silver City, it’s now called Gateway Cineplex 10.  Added bonus:  Silver City was a mere hop-skip-and-jump away from the record store.  If we cashed out quickly, we would have absolutely no problem catching the late show and still have time to get drinks, corn and a bar.

Homer was somewhat new in town and  didn’t know the way.  I did, so I led the car convoy.  We were pleased to see that it wasn’t too busy at all.  His buddy Ollie (who briefly worked for us later on) joined us, and we got our seats.  Silver City was the latest, most modern theater.  The stadium seating was awesome, we never had anything like this in town before.  I couldn’t imagine a better setting for a new Star Trek movie!

Oh, it got better.

I always enjoy the previews.  First up was a cool looking movie called Rushmore.  Not having a clue what we were seeing, it looked interesting and Homer and I made mental notes.  (Long story short – I love Rushmore.)

Second trailer though…

STAR WARS.

Yes, the Star Wars Episode I trailer had fans buzzing.  You have to remember that nobody had a clue yet what a useless piece of shit Young Anakin would be.  (I feel bad for the actor Jake Lloyd, nobody could have played that fucking character.) We didn’t expect Jar Jar to be even worse than the worst Ewok, with so much screen time.  None of these flaws could be discerned from that first trailer, which was a collage of pure bad-assery and cool imagery.  What were those beasts emerging from the fog?  What planet is this?  Holy shit Tattooine.  What’s that silver ship? Why did C3P0 have no coverings?  And who the fuck is that evil looking dude with the double lightsaber?!

I’d seen a choppy, small version of the trailer online.  To see it on the big screen, in surround sound, in front of a new Star Trek movie?  My mind was blown before the opening credits!

It was hard for a whole Star Trek movie to top that one trailer for Star Wars.  I think for us it was pretty equal – we left enthused about both.  Insurrection was good, but we all felt that it was much like an “extended episode”.  It wasn’t bad, it was certainly better than 1994’s Generations, but it lacked the weight of 1996’s First Contact.  As Trekkies, we were satisfied and excited to see where the franchise would go next.  As a money paying audience, we knew the movie was simply not up to the high bar set by First Contact.  As long as it didn’t get worse from there…

It got worse from there.  We had no idea that Paramount would flush it all down the shitter with Star Trek: Nemesis (2001).  Just as we had no idea that George Lucas had a massive clusterfuck of sewer sauce in the pipeline for Star Wars Episode I.  Instead, we choose to focus on the rush of that evening, the excitement of the experience.  In fact it is best summed up by Mr. Spock himself:

“After a time, you may find that having is not so pleasing a thing,
after all, as wanting. It is not logical, but it is often true.”

– Mr. Spock, Star Trek, Amok Time

Every Star Wars DVD or Blur-ray that I own.

Every Star Wars DVD or Blu-ray that I own.

Part 269: CD Singles (of every variety) featuring T-Rev

Welcome back to the WEEK OF SINGLES 2! Each day this week we’re look at rare singles. Today, we’re looking at lots and lots of them!  WARNING:  Image heavy!

Monday: Dream Theater – “Lie” (CD single)
Tuesday: Jimi Hendrix – “Valleys of Neptune” (7″ single)
Wednesday: Them Crooked Vultures – “Mind Eraser, No Chaser” (10″ single)
Thursday: Megadeth – “Creepy Baby Head” (“Crown of Worms” CD single)

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RECORD STORE TALES Part 269:  CD Singles (of every variety)

Featuring T-Rev

I’m going to take the blame for this.  It was I who got T-Rev into collecting singles in 1994-1995.  Oasis kicked his addiction into gear big time, but it was I that sparked his interest in singles.  According to Trevor today, “I suppose it was Oasis that started that ball rolling…then Blur taught me the tricks…Metallica helped mix the sauce…and then I was almost a pro, like you!”

T-Rev was already familiar with the dominance of singles in Europe.  “They’re so much cheaper in England!” he told me then.  “They have entire walls of them, like we do here with albums, but with them it’s singles.”

He had seen me go crazy for some of the singles that came into the store in the early days.  He saw me plunk down my hard earned pay for CD singles by Bon Jovi, Def Leppard, and many more.  He didn’t get why I was spending so much money on so few songs.  CD singles are much rarer here and commanded (new) prices similar to full albums.

IMG_20140205_130708“Why do you buy singles?” he asked me one day.  “I don’t get it.  The song is on the album, they come in those little cases, and they’re expensive.”

“I buy them for the unreleased tracks,” I explained.  “I don’t buy a single if it has nothing unreleased on it, but I want all the different songs.”

“But the unreleased songs aren’t usually any good, are they?” he continued.

“Sometimes,” I answered.  “But check out this Bon Jovi single here.”  I handed him a CD single that I had bought recently at an HMV store. “This one has ‘Edge of a Broken Heart’.  It’s a song that was recorded for Slippery When Wet, but it didn’t make the album.  Sometimes you find these amazing songs that are totally worth having.  Sometimes you only get live songs or remixes, but I still collect those because I try to get everything.”

When Oasis came out with (What’s The Story) Morning Glory, there were ample new singles out there to collect with bonus tracks galore.  T-Rev got me into the band very quickly.  Oasis were known not just for their mouths, but also for their B-sides.  Noel Gallagher was passionate about giving fans good songs as B-sides; he wanted them to be as good as the album.  Oasis had a lot of singles from the prior album Definitely Maybe as well, and one non-album single called “Whatever” that was absolutely marvelous.

Once T-Rev got onto the singles train, he had his own rules about what he wanted to collect and what he didn’t.  Packaging was important to him.  He hated CD singles that came inside little cardboard sleeves.  He couldn’t see them once filed on his CD tower, because there was no thickness to it; no spine to read from the side.  It didn’t matter what was on those CD singles; if the packaging sucked T-Rev was not usually interested.  This applied when we both started collecting old Metallica singles.  I found an Australian copy of “Sad But True” with the rare B-side “So What” at Encore Records for $20. This came in a cardboard sleeve; T-Rev didn’t want it.  (He also already had a live version via the Live Shit: Bing & Purge box set.)  Oasis started releasing their old singles in complete box sets, but T-Rev was only really interested in collecting the UK pressings.  There were a lot of variables to consider.  If you can’t or don’t want to buy everything, you have to set rules and pick and choose.

Once we understood each others’ needs, we were able to keep an eye open for each other.  T-Rev knew if it said Bon Jovi, Faith No More, or Def Leppard on it, that I’d be interested.  If it was a Brit-pop band like Blur or Supergrass, he’d want it (as long as it didn’t come in a paper sleeve).  Foo Fighters too, or virtually anything with Dave Grohl.  Our collections grew prodigiously with rare tracks, EPs we never heard of before, and loads of Metallica.  I believe at one point, T-Rev and I had nearly identical Metallica collections, duplicated between us.  More than half was singles and rarities.  We used to joke that there were probably only two copies of some of these things in town, and we had both of them in one apartment.

IMG_00000064T-Rev sold a lot of his singles but not all.  He still has some treasures.  Highlights include a Steve Earle tin can “Copperhead Road” promo (that he got from local legend Al “the King”).    There’s also Megadeth’s uber-rare “Sweating Bullets” featuring the in-demand “Gristle Mix” by Trent Reznor  Then there was a Blur thing, some kind of “special collectors edition” signed by Damon Albarn, in a Japanese pressing.  Trevor’s seen one sell for upwards of $100.  Then there was another band called “A”.  As Trevor said, “Remember these guys? It was like ‘Britpop punk’. I liked it anyway.”

Also still residing in his collection:  a Japanese print of Oasis’ “Some Might Say” that has two bonus tracks over the domestic version, and two versions of Foo Fighters’ “Big Me”.  One is from Canada, the other from the UK.  Both have different tracks.  I’d forgotten about these until I saw the pictures.

Those were the glory days of collecting.  I miss collecting CD singles.  I preferred hunting the stores downtown to get all the extra tracks to the way it is now.  Now, often you need to buy an iTunes download and several “deluxe editions” to get all the songs.  CD singles were just better, period.  Even just for the cover art of those Oasis singles, singles were much more fun to collect.  I miss those days!
T-Rev’s pics:
LeBrain’s pics:

Part 268 / REVIEW: “Lie”

Part 2 of a 2 part series.  For yesterday’s part, a review of the AWAKE album, click here.

Not only is this Part 2 of the Dream Theater review, but also a nice way to introduce THE WEEK OF SINGLES 2!  From Monday through Saturday, we’ll be taking a look at some rare singles.  Today’s is Dream Theater’s “Lie”.

RECORD STORE TALES Part 268: Lie

DREAM THEATER – “Lie”:  This single was given to me by a customer named Ed. He was one of my earliest customers, very much intro progressive rock and heavy metal. He was a couple years older than me, with ginger hair and big big “Bubbles” glasses.

I had seen a copy in Toronto, at the big HMV store at 333 Yonge St. For whatever stupid reason, I chose to pass on it. Maybe it was the price. When I got back to Kitchener, I tried to order a copy from Encore Records but they reported to me that it was deleted. I then tried to order it from Amazon.com, who had it on back order for months before they too told me they could not get any more.

There were a couple good reasons to need this single:

1. The unreleased bonus track “To Live Forever”.

2. The hard to find live track “Another Day” which was only on the very rare (very expensive) Japanese release of the Live at the Marquee EP.

While discussing Dream Theater albums with Ed one day in ’97, I explained my frustration at not owning this single.

“I have two copies,” Ed said. “I bought it when it came out, and there were two CDs in the same case.”

“Really?” I exclaimed. “Any chance you want to let one go?”

“I’ll think about it,” Ed said. “I don’t have two cases, just two CDs, and I don’t need the second one.”

“I’ll be happy to take that off your hands,” I answered.

Ed did indeed give me his extra copy of the CD. Even without the case and cover art, I was satisfied. I bought an empty 2 CD case to put my copy of Awake in, with the “Lie” single as a “bonus CD”. Not exactly the ideal for a collector like me, but it’s an original physical CD copy and that’ll do.

DT_0002“To Live Forever” was an obvious choice as a B-side, in comparison to the better tracks on Awake. It’s similar to, but not as spectacular as the mellow songs like “Lifting Shadows” or “Innocence Faded”. The live “Another Day” on the other hand is every bit as good as the Live at the Marquee CD. This single saves me from having to track down a Japanese copy!  Thanks, Dream Theater.

From the album itself comes the incredible Kevin Moore song “Space-Dye Vest”.  As mentioned in yesterday’s review, that is my favourite song from Awake.  It defies categorizing, and it has a dark but glowing soul.  Also included is the single version of “Lie”, which is nice if you plan on making a mix CD.  The album track didn’t lend itself well to that, since it melds into other songs on the album.

I don’t know what happened to Ed. He’d mentioned he was losing interest in rock music. I guess that can happen, inconceivable as it is to me!  He bought a bit of classical stuff, but I stopped seeing him towards the end.  Maybe Ed will stumble upon this blog, and I can thank him again for this great CD single.

Thanks Ed.

5/5 stars

Part 267: Singing in the Store

MR TROLOLO

RECORD STORE TALES Part 267:  Singing in the Store

What do you think about people singing in public?

Hey, I’ve done it.  I used to sing along to the music in my store.  Inevitably, a co-worker would say, “Hey, who’s singing this?”  I’d answer, “Oh, it’s Van Halen,” or whatever.  The punchline back to me:  “Well then why don’t you let them sing it?”

Hah hah.

I had one customer who used to whistle all the time.  He’d be browsing away, whistling a pleasant melody.  Some hated the sound of Whistling Man.  I’m not sure why, I’d rather listen to somebody whistling happily than the two girls over on Listening Station #3, shrieking “Oooh, that’s my shit, that’s my shit.”

It was always comical to hear people singing along to their headphones on the listening stations. Many were oblivious that anyone could hear them. Others were tapped on the shoulder by embarrassed family members. If I had a camera on my cell phone in those days, I would have been able to create some classic viral videos.

It was a little scary on one occasion. A kid who seemed a little disturbed was listening to some Kid Rock, and started swearing along, quite loudly and angrily. At first I didn’t know what to do; after talking it over with one of the bosses I gently interrupted him and asked him to stop singing along. He said OK, but about 10 minutes later, he was singing again.

I saw this kid a lot. That summer, he was coming in every day, usually in the morning. He often listened to a CD, sometimes two, and usually stayed an hour without buying anything. We didn’t really have any store rules about this kind of non-customer except to use your own discretion.

When he started singing again I had to cut him off. I told him that he’d listened to enough for today and showed him to the door. I think this is probably the only customer I’ve ever had to kick out for singing in the store.

To come back to my original point, I don’t mind a little singing in public as long as it’s unobtrusive and pleasant. I don’t need to know that your “shit is bananas”. But if you have a pleasant little melody in your head, what’s wrong with humming a happy tune?

Part 266: This sort of thing ain’t my bag, baby!

RECORD STORE TALES Part 266: This sort of thing ain’t my bag, baby!

The weirdest gift I ever received at the Record Store was an Austin Powers “Swedish-made” Penis Enlarger Pump. This was a “gag” gift from a group of co-workers. I recall not knowing how to react!  Awkward!  It’s true that all of us were obsessed with Austin Powers at the time.  Talking like him, reciting lines, all that stuff.  But a penis enlarging pump?  Sorry, that sort of thing really ain’t my bag, baby!  Meanwhile, I had gone to Chapters and bought books for everybody.  Normal books.  Not…books about penises or penis pumps or anything.  The same co-workers packed it up with “gummy boobs”, some silver zebra boxer shorts (too tight, sadly), and plastic handcuffs.

I’m one of those socially awkward guys to start with, so you throw a penis enlarging pump in a box with handcuffs and gummy boobs, wrap it up in Christmas paper and what you get is a blushing LeBrain!

Although I sold the penis pump at a garage sale, I did display it in my bedroom, briefly.  Here’s the photo to prove it!

Part 265: A Nightmare On Cocknuckles Street Redux: Special Edition

NIGHTMARE 7

RECORD STORE TALES Part 265:
A Nightmare On Cocknuckles Street Redux: Special Edition

A while ago, I presented a story called Part 104: A Nightmare on Cocknuckles Street.  I was telling it from memory, a tale of a customer phone call gone awry!  I re-told it the best I could, thinking that my original record store journal from that day had been lost.

I was wrong.  I found it.  I present to you the original journal from the actual day of events!  Buckle up. [Street names changed for this blog.]

Date: 2005/12/10 20:36

So here is a story.

I come in after going out to get a soda and a candy bar, I still have my coat on when the phone rings. Kyle’s with a customer so I grab it. A dude is on the other end.

Him: Hey buddy, I ordered some CDs last Saturday and I haven’t heard anything so I wonder if they’re in.

Me: Sure, I’ll check for you, one second OK? (puts down phone removes coat.) Thanks for waiting. We’re up-to-date on calling the special orders but I’ll check for you. What was the CD?

Him: It was the new Josh Groban.

Me: (Checking in the computer, I knew already there was no Josh Groban. So I checked to see if anybody had ordered one, and nobody had.) …Actually…we don’t have any record of anybody ordering a Josh Groban.

Him: Well what the hell! (Wife yelling in background) (To wife: He says they ain’t got no record of it! They lost it!) Well how could that happen?

Me: I’m not sure exactly…let me check another one. What others did you order?

Him: There was a Motley Crue.

Me: (Pretty sure of what I would find) Hmmm, I have nobody ordering one of those, either.

Him: Well that’s fucked up. (Wife yelling in background) (To me:) Did you hear that?

Me: No, not really.

Him: Be glad you didn’t.

Me: OK, understood.

Him: Now how hell did this happen? I handed the guy a piece of paper and he said he would order them for me! He said they would be here in seven days. So what the hell happened?

Me: To be honest, I don’t know, now is it possible you were at a different store?

Him: It was your store. You telling me you fucked up?

Me: I don’t know for sure but it is possible. Let me…

Him: Well aren’t you a bunch of geniuses down there.

Me: You ordered them to the [Record Store], [Cocknuckles Street] location?

Him: It was your store, on [Dicklock Street]!

Me: You just called [Cocknuckles Street].

Him: What is that?

Me: This isn’t [Dicklock Street] that you called, this is the [Cocknuckles Street] location.

Him: Well I didn’t know there was more than one! This is the number in the book! Why the hell isn’t [Dicklock Street] in the book, you tell me that!

Me: Dunno man. They messed that up I guess. [555-5555]. There ya go.

Him: [55]-What?

Me: [555-5555]. Bye.

NIGHTMARE 4

Part 264: Garbage Removal Machine / REVIEW: Motley Crue – Lewd, Crued & Tattooed – Live

 

RECORD STORE TALES Part 264:  Garbage Removal Machine

The year was 2004.  I had always been an active on various “social media” but back then the place to be was called IAM.  Iam.bmezine was the full name, but it was where I spent most of my time, and where some of the journals that appear here today originated.

I had joined an IAM book exchange group and specified that I was interested in collecting Stephen King.  Someone sent me The Stand and I was hooked, so I wanted to get more into the mythos.  This girl from Thunder Bay, Ontario sent me a few more as well.  A little bit later, she moved to Waterloo for school.  We met at William’s coffee pub to exchange some more stuff.  She was wearing a Motley Crue – Girls, Girls, Girls T-shirt.

One thing led to another and we ended up going out.  She came over to my place and we watched a couple rock movies.  She was into all things “retro”, so I decided to give her all my old cassettes.  Everything that was duplicated on CD, I gave to her.  All my Iron Maiden, all my Judas Priest, Motley Crue, Van Halen…everything that I had on disc.  She gladly took them, and I gladly took back my storage closet.

In return, she gave me her copy of Motley Crue’s DVD Lewd, Crued & Tattooed – Live.  “It sucks,” she said.  “Vince Neil sucks now.  I was so disappointed.”  I didn’t have the DVD, and it wasn’t especially high on my radar because yes, the Crue had been sucking as of late.  However the presence of Samantha Maloney on drums (filling in for the terminally ill Randy Castillo) meant that it was the kind of one-off that I enjoy owning.

One of the better performances

A couple of weeks went by with Thunder Bay Girl, but my guard was up; my spider senses were tingling.  I felt like she was obsessing a bit.  A bit later she told me that the reason she sent me the Stephen King books in the first place was just to contact me; she went out to a used bookstore, bought a couple Kings and sent them to me.  I know, not exactly So I Married An Axe Murderer behaviour, but there were other factors that made me start to feel uncomfortable.  When she asked me what I wanted for my birthday that year, I decided to pull the plug before it got too far.

I did the manly thing, and dumped her by email.  I know, I know.  All I can say in my defense is that I was right.  My spider senses detected something alright.  Although it didn’t happen immediately, she eventually exploded like a powder keg.  We chose to “remain friends” (not a good idea) but friendship soon turned to a hateful obsession.  She exploded on me one day — something about a ferret?  Eventually she moved back to Thunder Bay, and I never heard from her again.  I like to think that she took my tapes with her, and dumped them in a Thunder Bay landfill out of pure spite.  Although I wish I had kept some of those cassettes, I’ve decided to maintain a safe distance from Thunder Bay at all times.  It’s the only way to be sure.

MOTLEY SUCK_0001MOTLEY CRUE – Lewd, Crued & Tattooed – Live (2001 Motley Records DVD)

Here’s Uncle LeBrain with a dose of reality: This DVD sucks. Truly. It sucks. The New Tattoo album wasn’t great to start with, but this is awful. The awfulness can be boiled down to one factor: Vince Neil, the laziest singer in rock. Here, a breathless Neil does his thing: lets the crowd sing half the song, skips every other word, and weasels his way out of the tough notes.  Set-list wise, this relies heavily on the Motley hits with very little deviation. Which is good, can Vince even remember the lyrics to obscure tunes?

So embarrassing is Vince Neil’s performance on this DVD that I have only managed to watch the whole thing twice.  The main reason to own it is Samantha Maloney. Diehard Crue-heads will remember that drummer Randy Castillo had replaced Tommy Lee, but himself had to sit out the tour due to the cancer that eventually killed him. Ex-Hole drummer Samantha Maloney, the first and only girl to be in The Crue, took his place and did admirably well.  It all came to an end when she hooked up with Nikki Sixx.  You knew these guys just could not be in a band with a girl.

A second reason for me to keep this in my collection is “Nobody Knows What It’s Like To Be Lonely”.  This is an audio-only track, and also the first-ever official release of one of the earliest Motley songs.  To date, the only official release.  It was recorded in May 1981 at the same session that yielded Motley’s first single “Toast of the Town” / “Stick To Your Guns”.  I believe the song used to be known as “I Got the Power” and was written by Nikki Sixx for his old band, London.  It does piss me off that this audio track is only on a DVD, not a CD, but I’m sure those more tech-savvy than me can rip it to an mp3 file.

2/5 stars

Part 263: METALLICA’s Fan Can #4 (Video blog)

RECORD STORE TALES Part 263:  Metallica’s FAN CAN #4

Less a story, more a show-and-tell.  I purchased this rare Metallica Fan Can via a staff member of mine.  Her name was Wraychel, and she had a Metallica Club membership.  When she told me that year’s Fan Can (#4) was available for pre-order, I asked her to get it for  me.  The Fan Cans were legendary!  I can’t remember what I paid.  It was a lot.

Don’t mind the dust, but enjoy the video.